


Will things ever be the same

by Roxy279



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Clexa Endgame, F/F, F/M, M/M, Murphy and Lexa are like family, always clexa end game cause that’s the way it was suppose to be, little angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-16
Updated: 2018-08-01
Packaged: 2019-04-23 13:00:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 27
Words: 87,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14332986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Roxy279/pseuds/Roxy279
Summary: The deathwave happens. Lexa doesn’t die from the gunshot she survives and John and Emori are offered a way to survive the death wave but they have to take Lexa who is still healing. This is mostly set after the deathwave hits.





	1. Chapter 1

Murphy looked at the blonde in frustration she was still standing there staring at the blood stained bed. “Clarke, we have to get out of here.” Lexa was just taken from the room dead by Titus who shot her. The blonde looked devastated and even though people have called Murphy heartless. He felt for his leader.  
   
He approached her carefully and tried to place his hand on her arm but she just shook him off. “Look princess I know she meant a lot to you but if we don’t get out of here now we are dead. They will blame us for this.” She still didn’t answer. She stood by the bed looking at the blood soaked blankets sobbing. He shook his head and went to the door. He couldn’t die for her.  
   
He had to find Emori. He had to get out of here. He pushed the door and it opened. He sighed in relief. He looked over at the blonde who was still staring at the bed. He shook his head angry at himself for being so soft. He had to try one more time. He stood behind her. “Princess we have to go. The door is opened we have to get out of here, we have to get to this blockade shit that the bald guy was going on about when he was beating me senseless. Come with me.” Clarke shook her head.  
   
“She’s gone Clarke. Your girlfriend isn’t here to save us this time.” She turned to him sharply and glared. He rolled his eyes. “I’m not an idiot unlike the rest of our people I can see a helping hand when it is given and that woman who was just killed gave us so many chances but she’s gone now and we have to go.”  
   
“No.” She said softly. “You go Murphy, I’m going to stay and fix this.”  
   
“Fix what exactly?”  
   
“I have to stay to make sure that our people will still be the 13th clan. I have to stay and fight for the peace she did otherwise she died for nothing.”  
   
He sighed. “Damn it Clarke, you’re going to get yourself killed!”  
   
“I don’t care.”  
   
He clenched his fists. “I can’t help you, do you understand that? I have to go find someone. Those people you fight for, those people who had us imprisoned for no damn reason, those people who killed innocent grounders while they slept are not MY people.” He took a breath to calm himself. “I have to find the one person who is my people. I can’t help you.”  
   
She smiled at him softly. “It’s okay, Murphy. Go. I understand, believe me I do.”  
   
“Fuck.” He sighed.  
   
The blonde stood forward and took Murphy into her arms. “May we meet again.”  
   
He rolled his eyes and hugged her back. “It would be too soon princess.”  
   
She smiled through her tears. “Go.” She motioned at the door.  
   
He nodded and took off.  
   
...............  
   
Somehow he ended back in the ritual room where Titus held him. “Great!” He threw his arms up.  
   
“John?”  
   
He turned quickly and saw Emori. They both ran into each other’s arms. He pulled back. “We have to get the hell out of here Emori, shit went down, and the flamekeeper shot and killed the commander.”  
   
“What?!”  
   
“I know it’s messed up. Clarke stayed behind to try and fix shit as usual but we have to get the hell out of here.”  
   
“John wait, there’s something I have to tell you before we go.”  
   
“Can it wait?”  
   
“No. John, I’m pregnant.”  
   
His eyes widened. “Shit.” He said shocked.  
   
She rolled her eyes and hit him in his arms. “Shit?”  
   
“No, I mean shit this is great but shit this has happened at the worst time in history.”  
   
She smiled at him and kissed him softly on the lips.  
   
“I can offer you both protection.” Titus appeared from behind the Polaris shuttle. Murphy protectively pushed Emori behind him.  
   
“We don’t want anything from you!”  
   
He held up his hands and approached them slowly. “There is something big coming.” He looked at both of them.  
   
Emori stepped from behind John to stand beside him. “War?”  
   
He chuckled sadly. “No. Much worse.”  
   
Murphy was getting impatient. “Well, what then?!”  
   
“This isn’t the first time the city of light has been bought to my attention or those flame keepers before me. Alie has resurfaced for a reason.” He looked at John. “You know why she was created.”  
   
“Yeah.” He drawled, “To make human kind better but the bitch did that by setting off the bombs.”  
   
“Sha. But at the time that is the only option she thought she had as the world was about to go to war which would have left no survivors.”  
   
“Okay, so what is she back for then?”  
   
“Once again the world will end. Beca pramheda left journals for flame keepers that have her predict that something called nuclear reactors would melt and cause another praimfaya.”  
   
Emori looked at him shocked. “John? This is bad. I have been told stories about the praimfaya we will not survive.”  
   
“Okay then what’s your solution?”  
   
“There is a safe place you can go that will keep you, Emori and the baby safe.”  
   
“What’s the catch?”  
   
He sighed. “You take Lexa.”  
   
“Lexa is dead! You killed her!”  
   
“No.” He shook his head. “The fisa saved her. But she won’t be strong enough to face Ontari.”  
   
“How about you go tell Clarke?!”  
   
“No.” He shook his head. “I don’t know how the people will survive what’s to come but she will play an important role. As usual.”  
   
Murphy scoffed, “Then why try to kill her you idiot!”  
   
“Because she was putting Lexa’s life in danger!”  
   
He laughed and walked away. He looked at Emori and her stomach that would soon be full of a baby, his baby. He thought about Clarke and what she would want. He came to the conclusion that she would want Lexa safe. “Fine!” He huffed.  
   
“Good. Meet me by the gates. Take this.” He handed both Emori and John a necklace shaped like an infinity symbol. “This will get you anywhere no questions asked.”  
   
..................  
   
Murphy was pacing near the gates of Polis with an amused Emori looking on. “What’s the problem John?”  
   
He stopped and looked at her. “The problem? The world is going to end.”  
   
“Yes, it is and me, you and the baby will be safe.”  
   
“What about everyone else. Shouldn’t we warn them?”  
   
Emori sighed. “Okay, you know more about this stuff then I do. Can we stop these reactors from melting?”  
   
He shook his head. “No.”  
   
“Okay, so help me understand then? How would anyone survive this?”  
   
“I dunno, hide, find a bunker and wish for good luck.”  
   
“Okay.” She said as she moved closer to him. “Okay. So obviously not everyone is going to be saved. I’m an outcast in my clan same as you, we can warn them but it won’t change anything for us. They won’t help us or choose us to be a selective few that may survive. They will choose people like Clarke.”  
   
“And Bellamy.”  
   
“Yeah, this is beyond us John. We take the commander to this bunker, we stay down low and survive the radiation.” She shrugged. “What else can we do?”  
   
“What if the commander wakes and kills us?”  
   
“I don’t think she will do that. If you want to help your friend. This Clarke. Keeping Lexa alive is the way to do it. It’s the only thing you can do.”  
   
He nodded as she embraced him. “You’re right. I know you’re right.”  
   
“I always am John and don’t forget it.”  
   
   
Two horses with a cart attached to an old cart were bought through the gates with Titus trailing behind. In the cart was Lexa covered with blankets.  
   
“She is under the blankets.”  
   
Murphy moved to the cart and moved the blanket so he could see for himself that the commander was alive. He pulled it down slightly and saw the commander sleeping peacefully, she still had black blood around her lips but he could clearly see a pulse on her throat. He pulled down a little more and seen the wound which was covered by bandages. It looked reasonably clean. She was strapped to the cart with soft material tight enough to keep her still but not too tight to hurt her. He sighed and pulled the blanket back over her head. “How are we supposed to keep her alive?”  
   
“She is already alive. But everything you need will be at this location.” He handed Murphy directions.  
   
He looked at the parchment. “This is near the mansion?” He handed the directions to Emori.  
   
“Sha.” She nodded.  
   
Titus looked at Murphy. “I know you don’t owe me anything but please I beg of you give this letter to Lexa when she wakes.”  
   
He rolled his eyes and snatched it from him. “I don’t owe you shit but I’ll do it for her and for Clarke not for you.”  
   
“Mochof.”  
   
Murphy sighed at the sight of the older man. He looked remorseful. “Listen. I know you don’t trust the princess but she truly does want what’s best for everyone. If you want people to survive she is the one to lead everyone.”  
   
He looked down to the ground in shame. “I know.”  
   
Murphy sighed and walked away. “Bye, badly.” He sat down next to Emori. “I had a look, she’s pretty well secured in the cart so we can both sit at the front.”  
   
“Good.” She said as she made the horses move.  
   
“If Clarke survives the end of the world.” He chuckled. “Who am I kidding of course she will. WHEN Clarke survives the end of the world and finds out that Lexa’s alive and I kept it from her. She’s going to kill me.”  
   
Emori smiled. “Or she could just be thankful John.”  
   
“Nope. I’m a dead man.”  
   
Emori laughed and nudged him. “I’ll protect you.”  
   
He shook his head and smiled. He looked over his shoulder and saw Titus looking remorseful still standing there watching them leave. He felt sorry for the old fool. He clearly did care about Lexa, he rolled his eyes. Thinking that the ground has made him soft. He watched Polis disappeared over his shoulder and hoped that Clarke could save as many people as she could.


	2. Chapter 2

Lexa woke with a splitting headache. She groaned and tried to sit up but the was a sharp pain in her abdomen. She felt for it and felt that what was causing her pain was covered with bandages. Then it all came back to her. Titus, a gun, Clarke.....“Clarke?” She croaked. Still trying to sit up, still trying to open her eyes.

“Nope.” She heard a voice drawl. She looked to her left where the voice came from. She squinted and could see a blurry image of a man. 

“John Murphy.” She croaked. She rubbed her eyes and felt a Still in her wrist. She looked at it and seen a tube from her arm to a bad beside her. She looked back to Murphy.

“Yup.”

She rubbed her eyes again trying to see clearly. Slowly the images around her were becoming clearer. She was in a small room on a bed similar to that of the mountain men. “Where’s Clarke? Where am l?”

Murphy sighed. “Emori?” He called.

Lexa heard a door open and she watched as this Emori stood on her right side. Lexa looked her up and down and took in how clearly pregnant she is. “Finally.”

“What is happening? Where am I”

Emori looked at Murphy. “You haven’t told her?”

“No I thought I’d leave the talking to you.”

Emori rolled her eyes.

“Someone Explain now!”

“Okay.” Emori held up her hands. “You were shot by Titus. He thought you had died but when he took you to the healers they fixed you. He asked us to bring you here.”

Lexa looked around the unfamiliar room. “And where is here exactly?”

“A bunker.”

She shook her head sitting up slowly. “A bunker? I have to get back.”

Murphy scratched his head. “Yeah that’s not happening.”

“What!”

“John! Just go make her some food.”

“Fine.” He huffed.

Emori shook her head. “I love him dearly but he’s an idiot.” She looked at Lexa sadly. “Titus left you a letter explaining everything. Why don’t you read that then I’ll answer any questions you have?” Lexa nodded as Emori handed her the letter. “I’ll give you a moment alone.”

“Mochof.” Lexa started at the unopened letter. Her gut telling her this wasn’t going to be good news. She took a deep breath and ripped the letter open.

Heda.

First of all I want to say, my apologies. I only did what I thought was best. My job as flame keeper is to protect you as you hold the flame but also and I mean this with all sincerity, your special Lexa. I knew the first time you were bought to Polis that you would be Heda and I knew you would do great things. My biggest regret is not standing by you, you have always done what was right for our people it after you lost Costia you became hard. You became lonely and when I first heard you speak of Clarke kom Skaikru I knew that she was making you feel again and my mistake was believing that she was making you weak and that you were making decisions based on your feelings. I was wrong Lexa. You were making decisions for the best of all of us as usual and I am sorry. 

If you are reading this letter then you have awoken and are accompanied by Murphy and Emori. After I shot you I took you to the healers to make you look presentable to light the fire, they saved you by using blood from Aden. Something the fisa’s learnt from Abby kom Skaikru. I would have announced that you had been revived but and I am sorry to say this Lexa, But Ontari killed all the nightbloods in their sleep. They did not receive a warrior’s death. It was truly heartbreaking. I found Murphy and Emori and found you safe passage. The fisa told me you wouldn’t be active for quite some time. Now I refuse to give the flame to Ontari. She is not worthy, as I write this letter know that I am meeting Clarke and giving her the flame to find Luna. Even though I believe she is a coward she is a better choice than Ontari. Then I will end my life, I have failed you and I have failed the nightbloods. 

The reason why you are in a bunker is Beca pramheda prediction is near Heda, by the time you have read this praimfaya has once again hit. Clarke will find out and I am sure that herself and Skaikru will work hard to ensure that safety of as many people as they can. In my journals I have left notes about the underground bunker in Polis. I will be giving the journal to Clarke. 

I am sorry Heda. 

Titus. 

Lexa sat on the bed breathing hard. So many thoughts were going through her head she couldn’t sort them. She felt like she couldn’t breathe. Emori walked in and ran to her Side. “Lexa copy me?” Emori started breathing in and out for a good minute or two, slowly Lexa felt like she could breathe again. “I know you must have a lot of questions but we can take our time. JOHN!”

John walked in and sat by Emori holding her hand. Lexa looked over the letter. “The nightbloods?”

John shook his head. “Gone. Ontari killed them all in their sleep and announced herself Heda.”

Lexa felt the tears well up in her eyes thinking about the nightblood children. “Praimfaya?”

Emori spoke to her softly. “It hit 3 months ago. We have been here for four months.”

“Clarke?”

Murphy looked at her sadly. “I went to Arcadia a couple of weeks before the death wave to steal medical supplies. I saw her, she was alive and well. She had become chancellor and was working out ways to save everyone. Some chick called Luna showed up and they figured she survived the radiation because she is a nightblood as far as I had heard they were going to try and recreate it. 

“What about the bunker in Polis?”

“They found it and held a conclave, Octavia won, she allowed 100 people from each clan.”

“Was Clarke on that list?”

“She was but she left with Bellamy to find and save Raven. I don’t know what happened to them. I’m sorry.”

Lexa nodded. “Leave me.” She said softly.

Murphy and Emori left and when they closed the door they could hear the sobbing and screaming of a heartbroken woman. They both stood outside the door until her cries were no more. When they opened the door they had seen Lexa had cried herself to sleep. “Come John we will make her some food.”

“Okay.” He said sadly. 

...........................

When Lexa woke she found Murphy sitting on the bed beside her. “We made food.”

She sat up slowly still in pain. “Not hungry.”

“Yeah I don’t believe that, you have been receiving food from a tube. So right now you would be really hungry.”

“Very well I do not feel like eating.”

He sighed and looked at her. “Look I know this sucks okay. I made a promise to myself I’d keep you alive and to do that you have to eat.”

“Why do you care?”

He shrugged. “We are gonna be stuck in here for a long time. I just think we should all take care of each other. We are all we have when you think about it.” He sighed. “Also I think Emori being pregnant is making me soft.”

She smiled at him. “Perhaps.”

“I’m sorry about all of this.”

“Why? It’s not your fault.”

“I know but that couldn’t have been easy to hear.”

“No it wasn’t.”

“Look. I’m sure the princess survived somehow. She’s like that ya know. A fighter. A survivor. Every time I think okay she’s going to die from the situation she put herself in somehow she lives.” 

Lexa chuckled. “Sha.” She wiped the tears from her eyes thinking about the blonde and the last moment they had together. 

“Plus I kinda need you to get better before the baby is born cause I don’t want to help deliver a baby by myself.” He admitted quietly. “I found a book about delivering a baby and it was disgusting.”

Lexa chuckled. “Okay John Murphy I will eat.”

“Good.” He smirked. “When you finished Emori will come in and help you work the shower? You smell”

She smiled at him. “Okay.”

.....................

After Lexa finished eating Emori came in and showed Lexa how to work the shower. She also had to help her undress. “Don’t worry Heda you’re not my type.” She joked when she found that letting was uncomfortable with her helping take off her clothes.

Lexa rolled her eyes but smiled. 

Now she was in the shower letting the warm water wash over her sore and injured body. She cried when she thought of how many people would have died due to the radiation. She cried thinking about Clarke and her possibly being dead. She cried thinking about how sad Clarke would be thinking she was dead. The thought of never seeing the blonde again made Lexa physically sick. But she held it in. Lexa has always been a person who can make do with any situation and Murphy was right, she knew he was right, for all they know they are the last 3 people on earth. They are all they have until the radiation clears and the people from the bunker resurface. She stepped out and dried herself as best she could when she heard a knock on the door. She knew it would be Emori so she asked her to come in.

As Emori helped Lexa put on her shirt, Lexa felt guilty. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“For you having to do this.”

Emori shrugged. “I don’t mind.”

“When I am better I’ll help you with anything you need,”

“Can you keep John from making me crazy.”

Lexa smiled. “He is just worried I think.”

“He’s hovering.”

“Hmm I could teach him to fight. That would keep him busy.”

Emori smiled. “That would be great Lexa.”

Lexa smiled feeling like she accomplished something.

Emori led her out of the bed room. She looked around it was a decent size. There were two bedrooms beside each other, a kitchen and a couch with a big screen in the middle. There was also a book shelf full of books from the old world and a kitchen that was also a decent size. Murphy came into view. “It’s not big but it will be home.”

“Is there a way out?”

“Ah yeah but why would you want to know this?”

“I want to see if I can find any survivors. I want to see what it is like out there and as I am nightblood I will live.”

Murphy sighed. “Well even if I say ‘hey Heda you crazy it’s full of radiation out there you could still die’ I know you will most likely do it anyway.” He rolled his eyes. 

“I will not leave if it puts you both in danger?”

Emori held her elbow. “No it’s fine. There is a room between the door that clears out radiation. It’s safe for us.”

“Okay. Well tomorrow I want to leave.”

“Fine.” John huffed.

Lexa stood tall. “Now where is this book John Murphy.”

He smiled. “I thought you would never ask.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the comments and kudos. I just want to make myself clear that this is a clexa fic with clexa endgame. I understand some people’s hesitence I mean come on the thought of Clarke and Bellamy being together in the show make me angry and sick. But the beauty of fan fics is that it’s mostly a safe place where you can read a clexa fic with angst and know that it’s going to have a happy ending and if it doesn’t the writers usually are pretty upfront about it. I think you will like my version of Bellamy. I hate that I hate him in the show. And I hate that they ruined him so I always try to make him likeable in my fics whoch I think I’ve done successfully as I will in this fic. Anyways drop a comment. FYI next chapter we see What Clarke has been up too.


	3. Chapter 3

Clarke ran from the tower where she had to set up power to the ring as fast as her legs could take her. She didn’t know why she was trying so hard, figured it must be how she’s Built. Can’t quit anything not even life after all it’s thrown towards her. Losing Lexa was the straw that broke the camels back. But here she is trying to get to the Rocket before It takes off without her. She burst into the room and found the relived faces of bellamy Raven and Monty Harper and Echo. 

Bellamy smirked at her. “Took you long enough princess.”

Raven dragged them all into the rocket. “Come on idiots the easy part is over.”

Clarke sat down catching her breath and Bellamy sat beside her and echo beside him. “Here we go.” Bellamy said softly. 

Clark felt her stomach drop as the ship took off. She closed her eyes wishing this was all a bad dream. She held the flame in her hand. After the flame was needed no more she stole it back from Gai. Raven had laughed at her but Clarke shrugged and claimed it as her own. It was the only thing she had left of Lexa. So Raven had made her a necklace she could hang it on. It’s her most prized possession, not that she had much else. 

They barley made it on the ring all fighting for air, For their lives but somehow they managed and now here she was looking at earth from a big window from the ring. The earth was covered in red. She could feel the tears running down her face but was too exhausted to care.

She felt someone stand by her and knew it was Bellamy. “We will see them again in 6 years.”

“Not everyone.” She said softly.

he wrapped his arm around her shoulder. “I know you miss her and I know how much you loved her but you would have done her proud Clarke. We saved who we could. We did EVERYTHING we possibly could.”

“I know. I miss her.” She cried.

Bellamy held her in his arms. “I’m sorry.” He said sincerely. “I’m so sorry princess.” 

She sobbed in his chest. 

.............................

Present. 

Lexa got dressed and packed a bag full of supplies to leave the bunker. Murphy stood with his arms crossed looking annnoyed. “What do you expect to find?”

“Nothing really?”

“Then why go?”

“I have to see it for myself.”

He groaned. “Just be careful alright.”

Lexa smirked at him. “Careful Murphy, starting to sound like you care.”

“What ever. Take this” he handed her something with a screen and a spike. It also had some sort of dish on top.

“What is it.”

“It will track the radiation from outside. We will be able to see on the screens in here.”

“Where should I put it.”

“Near trees.”

She nodded as she stood up to the door. There was a big red button next to a rectangle steel door. Murphy pressed it and the door opened quickly making them both jump back. She stepped in and waved goodbye to both Emori and John. When the door was closed she looked forward to a similar door. It opened quickly and immediately she was hit with a warm fog. She coughed but made it out the door. She couldn’t see too far ahead. She jumped when she heard the door close. She went walking for 30mins and found some trees that were still in tact. They didn’t look like they were dying. So she put the device Murphy gave her in the ground next to it. She watched as it lit up. She heard a rustle so she quickly hid behind a tree. There was a cry. A cry of a small child. Lexa shook her head thinking she must be hearing things but the cry was still there and seemed to be moving away. She moved towards the sound but still stayed hidden behind the trees. From a far she could make out a small body. A child no older then three. She was sitting by the lake crying. Her clothes were torn and she was all skin and bones. It made lexas heart ache. She slowly approached the child. 

“Heya?” She spoke softly. The little girl jumped up and starting backing away. “Don’t be scared.” She squatted so she was at the girls level. “Ai laike Leksa kom trikru.”

The little girls eyes widened. “Trikru?” 

“Sha.”

“Me too. Ai laike Madi kom trikru.”

“Madi? That’s a pretty name.”

“Mochof.” 

“Madi were are your parents?”

The little girl sniffled. “I have no parents. I had an aunt but her fight is over.”

Lexa kneeled on the ground. “I am sorry young one.”

The little girl sobbed. “There is no one here.”

“I am here and I have friends?”

“How many.”

“Two. Murphy and Emori and Emori is with child and Murphy smells” she scrunched up her nose playfully.

The little girl smiled. “Really!”

Lexa chuckled. “Sha.”

The little girl bent over and threw up. Lexa ran to her. “I do not feel good Leksa.”

Lexa picked her up and held the girl close. “It will be ok.” She cooed. She ran as fast as she could with the little girl to the bunker. She stood up to the door and pressed the button. The door flew open and Lexa stood in the room between the door. Murphy’s voice came over a speaker. 

“Lexa who the hell is that!”

“Murphy not now do what you need to she needs medical treatment.”

She felt cold air go through the whole room and the it faded after 10 mins. The doors opened with both Emori and Murphy waiting eagerly.

Emori led Lexa and Madi to the medical room. “I can’t believe there was a survivor.”

“Sha. She is alone.”

Murphy got some medical equipment set up. “Poor kid. She got a name?”

“Madi.”

They set her up with fluids as Murphy said she was really dehydrated. And they also gave her antibiotics. “Will she be ok?”

Emori held her shoulder. “We don’t know Lexa. She’s been out there alone for so long. We will just have to wait and see.”

“Is there nothing we can do to ensure she lives?”

Murphy grabbed a chair and pulled it up beside the girl so Lexa could sit in it. “We are doing it now but she is very sick.”

Lexa felt tears well up. “She is strong.”

.....................

Madi slept for 12 hours straight. Lexa never left her side. When the little girl woke she sat up and started playing with lexas hair while she slept. Lexa sat up when she heard the little girl giggle. 

“Leksa. I’m hungry.”

Lexa laughed and hugged the girl. “Do not worry Madi, I will take good care of you.”

Emori and Murphy ran into the room when they heard the girl. They both smiled at the two who were holding each other close. 

“Hi.” Emori waved. 

“Emori?” She said and pointed at her belly. “And baby!”

“Sha.”

“Murphy?”

“Yup.”

Madi looked at Lexa. “He does not smell that bad Lexa.”

Emori laughed while John rolled his eyes. 

Lexa held the little girls hand. “I’d be nice young one he’s the cook.”

The little girls eyes widened. “I never said he smelt bad!” She looked at him. “You don’t Smell bad Murphy.”

“Ah ha.” He said but smiled. “You hungry kid?”

“Yes!”

“I’ll go make you something.”

Lexa smiled at the girl. “While He is doing that you need to bathe.”

“Ok!” Madi clapped. 

Lexa Helped her off the bed and the little girl instantly grabbed her hand. “I like it here Leksa.”

“Me too.” She said softly.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ok so this is a chapter I know most wont like. But like I have said it’s clexa end game like all my fics. Be kind and FYI I’m posting this as I won’t be able to for a couple of weeks but if I get enough time today I’ll post another.

The ring.

Clarke sighed as she sat there taping her pencil away. She had made another drawing of Lexa. This time it was of her back tattoos. She looked over her desk, scattered were forms and requests, it has been 6 years since they made their way to the ring. They came across another ship and joined. It is Eligius. A ship of dangerous criminals from the time the bombs fell. She was now leading with the military take no shit Charmaine. In a couple of days time they would make their way to earth which should now be radiation free. 

1 year ago.

Clarke was sittting on her bed drawing again, this is how she spent a majority of her time up in space. She looked up as Raven came in and sat down next to her. “Hey.” She smiled

“Hey.”

“What ya doing?”

“Same as every other day.”

“Oh so drawing Commander hottie.”

Clarke laughed. “Lexa, Raven. Her name was Lexa.”

“Commander hottie. Commander scary. Commander me anyday.” The machanic winked.

Clarke laughed. “Fair enough. Yes I am.”

Raven picked up one of her recent drawings. It was of Lexa standing in front of the Polis tower from a distance. “Your so talented Clarke.”

The blonde smiled. “Thanks.”

“Look I’m going to be real for a minute so don’t bite my head off.” She sighed. “Don’t you think it’s time to move on princess?”

Clarke sat up straight. “What?”

“Come on, Bellamy has been making moves on you for the last four years.”

“So?”

“So what’s the problem?”

“I don’t love him like that.”

“But you love him?”

“Yes but not... not as much.”

“Not as much as you loved Lexa.”

“Yeah.”

“Clarke. Look I’m going to sound like a bitch here but Lexa is dead. Ok. She’s gone and she’s not coming back. Life has been moving on and will continue to move on. You should give you and Bellamy a chance. He’s a good man.”

“I don’t want to move on.” She said softly with tears in her eyes.

“Lexa wouldn’t want you to be lonely forever.”

Clarke shot up from her bed and glared down to Raven. “How the hell would you know! None of you knew her!”

Raven stood up to face the blonde. “Because If she loved you half as much as you loved her then she wouldn’t want this for you! Look at you Clarke! You never leave this room! You lock yourself in her drawing pictures of a dead woman! AND you barely eat or talk!”

“Float you!” She yelled as she pushed Raven making the another woman land on the bed.

“You can push me all you like princess but you know what I’m saying is true!” She stood up again to face the blonde. She laid her hand on her arm gently. We love you Clarke.”

Clarke slumped down on her bed and lent forward with her elbows on her knees. “It wouldn’t be fair to him.”

“How?”

“Cause my love for him would never compare to my love for Lexa.”

Raven sighed and sat down beside her and too the blondes hand. “I think he would take any love from you Clarke. Look all I am saying is that I think you should give it ago.” She held up a drawing of Lexa it was of her on her throne teaching the nightbloods. “This is the past princess. A past you will never forget but Bellamy...Bellamy is here in the now.”

She ended up taking Raven’s advice, that same night Bellamy found her and they had a good talk. She told him how she still loved Lexa and that the mere memory of her is hard to let go of. He held her hand and looked at her sympathetically. He nodded and listened to all she had to say not once interrupting her. When Clarke was finished talking they shared their first kiss. She smiled at him with tears in her eyes because the kiss could never compare to the kisses she shared with Lexa but she didn’t push him away because it felt ok. It didn’t feel completely wrong but she thought with time maybe it would feel good.

Present. 

Clarke was torn from her memory with a knock on the door. “Come in.”

Bellamy walked in smiling. He walked over to her and kissed her softly on the lips. “Ready to go home?”

“Yeah.” She smiled back. “I miss my Mom.”

“I know I miss Octavia like crazy.” He sat on the desk. “How do you think your Mom will take our engagement news.”

“Don’t know.” She shrugged. After dating for six months Bellamy popped the question. She didn’t answer straight away and locked herself in her room looking at pictures of Lexa. She cried because she realised that Lexa would never have to chance propose to her or vice versa. She cried because if she said no she would break Bellamy’s heart. So when he found her later that night she said yes. 

“Can you tell Raven it’s time to go.”

“Sure.”

Echo walked in. “Hey Wanheda. We going home or what?”

“Hey Echo nice to see you too? How’s your day going? Good?”

Echo rolled her eyes. “I just seen you yesterday!”

Clarke laughed. “Thanks. Good to see you too? Where is your girlfriend she usually stops you from putting your big foot in your big mouth.” 

Raven came and hugged Echo from behind. “Only a little princess. She is who she is.” She kissed Echo on the cheek. “Everyone is ready for take off. There are three pods. We will all be in the same one and I’m going to fly, obviously.”

“Ok.” She took a deep breath. “Let’s go home!”

.................

Lexa was awoken by a small body jumping on her. “Ompff.”

Madi giggled. “Wake up Nomon!” 

Madi was now nine and still full of life. It didn’t take her long to recover from when she first found her and it only took three months for Madi to start calling her Nomon. It was the proudest moment of her life.

“I’m up child.”

She heard the little footsteps of another child and prepared herself for the impact. Little John junior jumped on Lexa giggling as well. He was five and the spitting image of his father. “Come on aunt Lexie! You said you would take us fishing today!”

She felt another body hit hers and knew instantly who it was. “Yeah get up lazy!” Murphy laughed. 

“Get off me!” Lexa laughed. She pushed Murphy off the bed leaving the kids in hysterics. 

Emori laughed from the doorway. She was once again pregnant. Five months pregnant. “John how do you always end up on the floor?”

He stood up and shrugged. ”I’m a gentleman.” He said with his chin held high. “I simply let her throw me to the floor.”

Jay jay laughed. “Daddy! She does it all the time.”

“Yeah.” He picked his son up. “I let her.”

Lexa sat up. “Shall we spar later?”

“Sure.” He shrugged. “I’ll let you win.”

She chuckled at her friend. Her brother.

Emori walked in and slapped him upside the head. “Come on lex get up. Get this fool away from me for an hour or two.”

Murphy smiled and kissed his wife. “You love me.”

“Sha. Now go on get out.”

.............

All four of them spent the whole day fishing and decided to take a trip in the Jeep to see if they could get supplies from Polis. The kids were playing in the field and John and Lexa sat on the car. The Polis tower was only 1 tenth of its size and wild life had grown around the debris but they could still find supplies. “Do you think the people in the bunker are ok.”

Lexa nodded. “Sha. They would have made sure they had an adequate amount of supplies.”

“How will they get out, there’s so much debris.”

“They will figure it out.” She looked at him and nudged his shoulder. “Do you miss them? Your people?”

He smirked. “Nah. They were never my people really. Emori you and the kids are. What about you?”

She took a moment to think about it. She looked at the kids running around and smiled. “Sometimes. But I’m grateful for what I have. What we have.”

“Do you miss being Commander.”

“No.” she replied instantly. “I would much rather be a mother and an aunt.”

They both jumped from the car when they heard a big crash. They looked to the sky and seen three ships. John whistled and waved the kids over. They came running. All of them ran to the car. “Murphy back the car up, Madi and jay jay you stay here do you understand!”

“Sha” they both nodded.

Lexa quickly grabbed the binoculars and watched as the car backed up. She quickly ran and climbed up a tree, she lied on her stomach looking through the binoculars. Murphy made his way up catching for breath. She handed him the binoculars and he frowned. “Eligius?”

“Why does that sound familiar?” She asked as she took them back from him.

He clicked his fingers. “I remember hearing about them up on the arc. It’s a mining company that got funded as they took dangerous criminals from earth and imprisoned them. They went off the radar though.”

“Hmm.” 

“What should we do?”

“Observe. If they are indeed a mining company then perhaps we can talk them into removing debris from the bunker.”

“If they are insane?”

“I’m not sure yet. We should wait and see.”

“Ok.”

It took 30 mins for the ships to land safely and for the doors to open. The first person to walk out made Murphy gasp. Lexa frowned and took the binoculars back from him. “Is that Raven?”

“Yup.” 

Raven jumped up and down in the air yelling something but they couldn’t hear. Lexa watched as a woman came down and jumped on Raven’s back. “And look it’s Echo?”

“No way!” John said taking them back and looking through the lenses. “Shit they are getting it on!”

Lexa switched back and seen that yes they were kissing. “What an odd couple.”

Murphy laughed. “Raven was always a bit odd Heda.” He took the binoculars back. Lexa watched from the distance as two other people got off the ship. Murphy went quiet which was strange so she looked in the distance and could see these two people hugging. “Is everything ok?” She asked.

“Ah.” He gulped. 

She tried to take the them back but Murphy kept it out of her reach. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing I’m just observing is all.”

“Murphy give me the binoculars.”

He sighed and hesitantly gave them to her. She looked through the lenses. “Oh.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Be kind.


	5. Chapter 5

Lexa looked through the lenses and saw a familiar head of blonde hair. And she seen that person embraced and kissed by another familiar face. Bellamy Blake. “Oh.” She gulped. She watched as Clarke seemed to be barking out orders to everyone who got off the ship. That made Lexa smile. She smiled because Clarke kom Skaikru kru is alive. “She’s alive.”

Murphy sighed. “Yeah I told ya she would out live the end of the world” 

Lexa smiled sadly again as Bellamy wrapped his arm around her. “Sha You did. They seem to be heading towards the bunker.”

“That’s good.” He looked at his friend. “Are you Ok?”

Lexa smiled at him sadly. “I will be. She’s alive that’s all that matters.” 

“Lexa-“ he began.

“I swear I am ok.” She sighed looking through the lenses again. “It’s been six years Murphy and she thought I was dead. She’s special. Men and woman would be lining up to court her. It was only a matter of time before someone swept her off her feet.”

“Still...”

“Murphy take the kids back to the bunker, I will come back soon I have to keep watch.”

“I’m not leaving you here alone!”

“Look.” She handed him the binoculars. “Clarke is clearly in charge. I will be fine.”

“That’s not what I’m talking about Lexa.”

She held his hand. “It hurts ok.” She gulped. “But I will be ok.”

He hit the tree. “Damn it this is all my fault!”

“Murphy.” She squeezed his hand. “I understand why you didn’t tell her. I don’t regret these last 6 years. I got myself a family out of it. Perhaps me and Clarke are simply not meant to be.”

He groaned. “I’m coming back!”

“No stay put. Go get the radio and I’ll keep in contact with you through that ok?”

“Lexa-“

“Murphy just do as I ask. Please.”

“Fine.” He huffed and climbed down the tree. He came back and threw the radio up to her. “Keep me updated or I’m going to think something is wrong.”

“Very well.” 

He shook his head and took off towards the car. She sighed looking through the binoculars. Clarke’s hair was shorter and she looked healthy. That made Lexa happy. She watched on sadly as Bellamy said something that made Clarke smile. She sighed. “Welcome home Clarke.”

...................

Clarke laughed as Bellamy cracked a joke. Charmaine came marching towards them. “Wanheda what are your orders?”

“We have to move the debris to release the people from the bunker.”

“Ok.” She turned around and started barking orders. 

Raven and Echo came beside her hand in hand. “The place doesn’t look as bad as what I thought.”

Echo sighed. “Polis is no more.” 

“We can fix it.” Clarke said as she stood up straight. “It will be better then what it was.”

Bellamy wrapped his arm around her. “That’s my girl.”

Raven pretended to gag making Echo laugh.

Clarke shrugged him off lightly and turned back to follow Charmaine. “Charlie?”

“Yes.”

“We have to talk about the prisoners.”

Charmaine rubbed her temple. “Clarke we can’t keep them locked up forever.”

“Why not? Some of them have done things no person could ever dream of.”

“Look. They are my prisoners. I’ll deal with them.”

Clarke shook her head. “I trust you Charlie but if they step one foot out of line I’ll kill them myself.”

“Understood.”

.......................

Lexa kept on watching from the same spot. Mainly she had been watching Clarke, the woman hasn’t changed a bit. This entire time she hasn’t taken a break, eaten or drunk. 

The radio crackled to life. “Lex?”

“Heya Emori?”

“Murphy and the children just got back he has just told me what is going on. Lexa are you ok.”

“Sha.”

“We are both worried.”

“You both worry for nothing.”

“Lex....this is Clarke. You once referred to her as your soulmate.”

Lexa sighed and rubbed her temple. “Maybe I was wrong.”

“Lex...”

“Emori like I told Murphy, it hurts but it has been six years. She’s entitled to a life.”

“So are you Heda.”

“I have a life, Madi you John and jay jay are my life.”

“And you are ours.”

Lexa smiled. “Being a mother has made me soft.”

Emori laughed into the radio. “This is true.”

“She looks good.”

“Does she.”

“Yes. Healthy. At peace.”

“Well that is good I guess.”

“Sha. I would rather her alive and happy then dead. Even if she’s happy with someone else.”

“Do you still love her Heda”

“I never stopped.” she said softly. She heard yelling and looked through the binoculars and seen people run up to a hatch. 

................

Clarke pushed her way to the front. “Move!” Bellamy walked up beside her and held her hand. “Go a head bellamy.” She pointed to the door.

He smiled and walked slowly to the hatch. He took a deep breath and pulled the hatch back. He looked down and seen a face he hadn’t seen in 6 years. “Indra?”

“Bellamy?”

“Where’s my sister?”

Indra made her way up the hatch and looked at Clarke. “Clarke.” She nodded. 

“Indra.” Clarke smiled and took her arm in the warriors handshake. “It’s good to see you.”

Indra smiled. “You too.” 

“CLARKE!” Clarke look towards the hatch and seen her mother climb up. She know had a bit of grey in her hair but she still looked the same. “Mom?” She said softly as tears welled up in her eyes. 

“Honey!” Her mother ran to her and hugged her tight. 

“Mom.” Clarke sighed. “I was starting to think I’d never see you again.”

Abby laughed through her tears. “Oh honey I had no doubt you would find your way back down.”

“O!” Bellamy yelled as Octavia made her way up the hatch.

Octavia smiled at her brother and jumped in his arms. “Big brother. I thought I would never see you again.”

He chuckled through his tears as he held her tight. “No way. Nothing could keep me from my sister. Not even space.”

Clarke smiled at the interaction. She pulled back from her mother. “Charmaine!”

“Yes wanheda.”

“It’s time to set up camp. Send out some scouts to check the perimeter and Tomorrow we start to rebuild.”

Abby smiled and cupped her daughters cheeks. “After all these years the only thing that has changed is your hair.”

Clarke smiled and watched as her friends reunited with loved ones. 

....................

Lexa smiled watching Clarke reunite with her mother. “Lexa?” She heard Murphy though the radio. 

“Yes.”

“What’s happening?”

“The got the bunker open just looks like they are reuniting at the moment.” She felt a bit hungry and uncomfortable so she got down from the tree and started eating some dried meat. 

“That’s good.” Murphy said.

“Sha. Can you put Madi on?”

“Nomon?”

“Heya young one I’m sorry you had to rush off before.”

“That’s Ok Nomon. Is Clarke part of those ships!”

“Sha.”

“Are you going to be toghter Nomon.”

Lexa smiled sadly. “No Madi she already has someone.”

“Oh.” The girl said sadly. “Well Nomon we have to find you someone then!”

Lexa chuckled. “Maybe.”

“I love you Nomon.”

“I love you too. Now go get ready for dinner and have a good sleep Yes.”

“Sha Nomon.”

“Lexa?” Murphy said. “When are you coming home.” 

“I’m going to watch a little while longer then I’ll start the journey home. I have to make sure these people mean no harm.”

“Lex-“

Lexa heard twigs snap. “Murphy someone is near.” She whispered. “I’m going to hide the radio if you haven’t heard from me in a day then come but only you.” She turned off the radio and quickly shoved it between the tree and the ground. She marked a small x on the tree with her blade so she could find it. She stood up as two men made their way toward her. One was a skinny red head man the other was an older man in his 50s.

“Holy shit!” the older one said.

The red head looked just as shocked. “What the fuck!”

“Hello.” Lexa said calmly. 

Both men panicked and held up their guns. “Don’t fucking move.”

“Ok.”

The red heads eyes widened. “Fuck man she speaks English!” Lexa rolled her eyes. “You’re coming with us.”

“No I’m not.” She replied calmly.

The red head looked angry. “We will shoot you.”

She shrugged. “Wouldn’t be the first time I have got shot.”

“Ok. The older man said. “Let’s talk calmly.”

“Put down your guns then?”

“Ok.” He said as he lowered his gun.

“What man are you crazy!” 

“Put down the gun Dave.”

“No!” He walked towards Lexa. “You will come with us.” 

Lexa smiled, she quickly hit the gun out to the side and punched him in the throat sending him to the ground. The red head held up a different looking gun and shot her sending her to the ground. 

“Sorry....” he held up his hands. “Taser.” He shrugged then hit her in the head knocking her out.

...............

Clarke was sitting in her tent that had been set up for her. It was bigger then anyone’s else and they bought up a desk from the bunker along with a chair and a bed. She was sitting at her desk drawing the outline of the old Polis and matching it up with the new Polis that she had in mind. The scouts that Mia had sent out would have to given writing reports of what’s left. Then she would have to see it for herself and see what could salvaged. 

Bellamy walked in the tent and smiled. “Do you ever stop working.”

She shrugged. “There’s always work to be done.”

Bellamy took the pencil from her hand. “Come to bed.”

She sighed. “You go ahead.”

“Clarke you have to take a break.”

“Yeah I will.”

“When?”

She smirked. “When I’m dead.”

He laughed and kissed her. They both pulled away when they heard a scuffle outside. 

Clarke stood and watched as two men lead by Charmaine bought in a unconscious person. She couldn’t make out the face as they covered their head.

“What the hell is this Charmaine!”

“My scouts found a native.”

“What.” Clarke frowned. “That’s impossible it must be someone from the bunker.”

Bellamy moved forward but one of the men stood in his way. “She’s dangerous.”

The older man scoffed. “You attacked her you fool! She just fought back. Kicked his ass actually.” He smirked.

“Fuck you!”

“Enough!” Yelled Clarke. 

The unconscious woman started to wake. So the two men bought her to her knees. “Get up native!”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Remove the bag you idiot!”

He yanked the bag off her head. 

Bellamy gasped. “Holy shit...”

Clarke stood their staring. He mouth hung opened. She couldn’t find words. “Lexa?”

The green eyes beauty looked at Clarke and smiled softly. “Hello Clarke.”


	6. Chapter 6

“Hello Clarke.”

Clarke couldn’t believe it. She looked Lexa up and down to make sure she was real. The hair, the eyes. It Was Lexa. In the flesh. Not just Lexa from her dreams. She looked the same just a bit older and lighter, but not skinny, lighter in the way she looked like the whole world had been taken of her shoulders. She wore blue jeans and a blue singlet and combat boots. She was gorgeous, even more so then the last time she seen her. She had have been standing there for two Minutes now frozen in her place. She snapped out of it when she heard Bellamy clear his throat. She shook her head and looked at the brunette again and noticed blood dripping from her eyebrow and looked at the two men with anger boiling in her veins. “Who hurt her?”

Dave smiled. “Me” 

Clarke took a deep breath walked to her desk and grabbed her rifle. “Clarke.” Bellamy warned. “Calm down.”

But she ignored him and walked up to Dave and hit him in the face with the butt of her rifle causing a cut and sending him unconscious. “Get him the hell out of here!” She said to the older man. He nodded and threw the man over his shoulder. 

Charmaine stood next to Bellamy. “Someone you both know?” She whispered.

“Yeah.” He said still in shock. 

Clarke helped Lexa up with shaken hands. “Lexa?” She asked again. 

“Clarke.”

Clarke smiled and threw her arms around the brunettes shoulders and squeezed her tight. “You’re alive?” She said softly as the tears ran down her face.

Lexa hugged her back tightly. “Sha.”

Clarke wiped her tears on Lexa’s shoulder. She pulled back and gripped the brunettes shoulders firmly looking her up and down. Making sure she’s real. She cupped the brunettes face then started patting down her arms just to make sure she wasn’t dreaming “How? I seen you die Lexa?”

Lexa smiled softly. “It’s a long story.”

Clarke looked over her shoulder to Bellamy and Charmaine. “Can you give us a minute?”

Charmaine nodded and left. 

Bellamy walked past Clarke and kissed her on the cheek. It made Clarke feel uncomfortable with Lexa just standing in front of them. “Just call if you need me.” He smiled to her. He then looked at Lexa. “It’s good to see you well Lexa.” He said sincerely.

“You to Bellamy.” He smiled kindly as he left the tent. 

Clarke was still staring at the brunette and holding her shoulders tightly to afraid if she let go Lexa might disappear. “Hi.” Lexa said softly.

Clarke hugged her again. “Are you real?”

Lexa chuckled and buried her face in Clarke’s shoulder gripping tightly. “Sha.”

Clarke pulled back and held on to lexas hands and pulled her towards the bed. She shoved her down gently so Lexa was sitting on the edge. Lexa watched on amused as the blonde was tearing her tent apart looking for something. “Found it!”

Lexa smiled as Clarke sat next to her with a first aid kit and started cleaning her wound. Lexa placed her hand on Clarke’s leg. “I’m ok Clarke.”

Clarke ignored the warm feeling her touch sent to her stomach. “Tell me how your alive?”

Lexa smirked. “Luck?”

Clarke rolled her eyes but smiled at the brunette. She starting stitching the wound. “Was it an act?”

“By Titus yes. He took me to the healers and they fixed me, he sent me away with Murphy and Emori cause he knew the deathwave was coming and I was in no state to fight. I have been there ever since.”

“Murphy knew you were alive?”

“Sha, He did what he had to to ensure the survival of his wife and child.”

Clarke stopped and looked at Lexa with wide eyes. “He has a kid!”

Lexa chuckled. “Sha. His name is jay jay, short for John junior. He’s five.” She smiled. “I have a child too.”

Clarke froze and lowered her hands trying to think of how Lexa could possibly have a child. “Murphy’s?” She asked with a lump in her throat.

Lexa chuckled. “No. Emori and John a bonded and you know I only like woman. Her name is Madi kom trikru, when I woke for the first time I wanted to venture out and see the damage that was done. I heard her crying, she looked terrible. Very under weight and dehydrated. She passed out and I quickly carried her back to the bunker where we treated her.”

“She’s a nightblood?”

“Sha.”

“How old?”

“Nine.”

Clarke smiled and held lexas hand. “I would like to meet her someday.”

“I would like that too. I have a photo of her but it’s in my back pack hidden with my radio. I’ll show you before I leave.”

“Leave?” Clarke felt the air leave her lungs. Lexa can’t leave she just found her again. “What do you mean?”

“I have a family now. I must return.”

“Return? Where?”

“It’s a two day walk from here.”

“Oh.” She said sadly and continued to stitch the cut. When Clarke was done she looked at the brunette and couldn’t stop staring. “You look good.” She smiled. 

“So do you.” The former Commander replied softly and ran her hands through the blonde hair. “You cut your hair.” She tugged it playfully.

“Yeah.” Clarke chuckled and again ignored that feeling in her stomach. The blonde reached forward and cupped her cheek and ran her thumb over her jaw. “Your here?”

Lexa held Clarke’s hand. “Yes. You look good Clarke.” The brunette forced a smile. “Happy.”

“Yeah.” Clarke said with a bit of uncertainty. She linked their hands together and played with the brunettes fingers. 

“You and Bellamy?”

Clarke looked away from Lexa but still holding on tightly to her hand. “That’s not important right now.”

“I’m happy for you.”

Clarke held back the tears. “Thanks.”

Lexa stood up and Clarke stood up with her. “I have to go get my radio.”

Lexa went to move out the tent but was held back by Clarke still having a firm grip on her hand. “I’ll come.”

“No need.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “I’m coming.”

Lexa smiled realising the blonde hasn’t changed a bit. “Ok.” 

....................

Lexa led Clarke to the tree that had Lexa’s stuff. Clarke held her hand the entire way there. Even when Lexa bent down to pick up her bag Clarke wouldn’t let go and gave Lexa no indication that she would so Lexa made do with one hand. It would have been awkward but Lexa missed the blonde so much that she didn’t question it. Lexa smiled at the blonde and turned on the radio. “Murphy?”

“Lex! What the fuck happened?”

“I’m ok Murphy I’m here with Clarke.” 

“Fuck Lexa! It’s been two hours I was worried sick!”

Lexa smiled into the radio. “I’m fine I swear it. Just a cut.”

“A CUT!? What kind of shit show is Clarke running there!?”

Clarke rolled her eyes. Same old Murphy she thought. She held out her hand and raised an eyebrow at Lexa.

“Be nice?” Lexa smiled.

“I’ll try.” She held the radio up to her mouth. “You know I can hear you asshole.” Lexa chuckled and shook her head. It made the blonde smile, her first real smiled in a long time. 

“I know I said it loudly princess.” He huffed. “Bad Enough your banging the bell boy! But to have Lexa injured-“

Lexa took the radio off Clarke and cut him off. “Murphy enough!”

Clarke’s smile was wiped from her face and she looked away guilty. She knew she shouldn’t feel guilty but she did. She couldn’t help it. Clearly Lexa had said something to Murphy about her and Bellamy.

“I’m sorry Lexa.” He said sadly.

The brunette sighed and tugged at Clarke’s hand to get her to look at her. When she Did Lexa smiled at her sadly. “It’s fine, I’m fine, I’m going to leave now.”

Clarke shook her head. “Actually you should stay till at least the morning, it’s dark out now?”

“It’s a two day trip by foot Clarke.”

Murphy came in over the radio. “I agree Lexa. It’s dark I’ll meet you half way tomorrow in the rover.”

“Ok, Mochof. Where’s Emori?”

“She felt a bit sick this afternoon, been sick a couple of times so she’s sleepin.”

“Make sure she drinks plenty of water.”

“Will do Commander. Take your radio with you this time please.”

“Of course.”

.........................

Again on the walk back Clarke held lexas hand tightly not letting go for even one second. 

When they got back Clarke was ordering a tent be set up next to hers for Lexa. 

“Actually Clarke” Lexa interrupted. “I think I may set up a tent somewhere else.”

The blonde frowned. “What? Why?”

Lexa shrugged. I like it over there.” She pointed to no area in particular.

Clarke looked over to where Lexa was pointing and shook her head. “What difference does it make. Do you not want to set up a tent next to mine?”

Lexa blushed and looked away. “It’s not just your tent, it’s yours and Bellamy’s”

“So?”

“So I would feel more comfortable over there.” She pointed in a complete different area then the first time.

“What?” Clarke looked at the brunette who wouldn’t make eye contact with her. Then she realised. “Oh!” She stepped closer to the brunette and squeezing her hand. “Hey look we won’t do anything.” She said quietly.

Lexa pulled her hand back gently but Clarke wouldn’t let go. “It’s fine Clarke. It’s your right. You and Bellamy shouldn’t stop being yourselfs just cause I’m here.”

“Lexa.” She pulled at the her hand so she would look at her. When she finally did she seen the sad look in her eyes. It broke her heart. “I promise we won’t-“

“No.” Lexa held up her hand. “I’ll sleep somewhere else.”

Clarked sighed in defeat. “Ok.” She said softly. 

Clarke took Lexa to where she could get her own tent. Even then she wouldn’t let go of Lexa’s hand making it difficult for the brunette to carry things but she managed. On the way to the area where Lexa wanted to set up They passed three men that were looking at the both of them strangely. Every instinct in Lexa’s body was calling out danger. She pulled Clarke closer and glared at them and kept walking with her head held high. 

Clarke offered to help set up the one man tent but Lexa waved her off and stood at there staring at the blonde.

“Klark?”

“Yeah.”

“I need my hand back.”

Clarke looked down to their hands and blushed. “Right. Yeah.”

Lexa smirked as the blonde still wouldn’t let go. “Can I have it back for a while.”

Clarke grinned. “No.”

“No?”

“Yeah. You can set up a tent with one hand right?” She said cheekily.

Lexa smiled. “I have many skills but I believe I need both hands for that task.”

“Ok.” Clarke shrugged but still didn’t let go.

Lexa shook her head in amusement. She bought the back of Clarke’s hands to her lips and kissed it gently. “I’ll only be a minute.”

Clarke sighed dramatically. “Fine.” She huffed and let go immediately missing the warmth.

When it was done they both stood in front of the tent and Clarke took the brunettes hand back. “Who were those three men we passed before.” Lexa asked 

“Prisoners.” 

“Clarke I know a predator when I see one. Those men are dangerous.”

Clarke looked over her shoulder at the three men, Who were staring at them. “I have it handled.”

“It’s not safe in this camp with men like that.”

“Ok.” Clarke nodded. “I’ll talk to Charmaine tomorrow she’s in charge of the prisoners.”

“Good. Well?” She sighed. “I better get some sleep I have a big trip ahead of me tomorrow.”

“Right.” Clarke sighed. She moved towards Lexa and wrapped her arms around the brunettes waist and buried her head into the brunettes neck. “I’m so glad your alive Lexa.” She said softly.

“I am glad your alive too Clarke. I thought you were dead.” Lexa hugged her tight. “I’m so glad your not.” 

Clarke pulled back and rubbed her hand up and down lexas arm still not believing that the brunette was here. “I’ll be here first thing tomorrow morning.”

Lexa nodded. “Ok. Goodnight Clarke.”

“Reshop Heda.”

...........

Clarke was sitting in her tent at her desk after saying goodnight to Lexa. She tried to sort her thoughts out about today’s events. Lexa was alive but the simple fact was she was engaged to Bellamy. She sighed as she looked at the new Polis map. 

Raven burst into her tent. “I just spoke to Bellamy! Lexa is alive!?”

“Yeah.” She sighed and slumped forward in the desk. “She has a child too”

“Well fuck me!” Raven said in awe. She sat down next to her friend. “How are you feeling?”

“Lost.” She looked up to the brunette. “She looks good.”

“Yeah? Commander me good?” She wiggled her eyebrows.

“Always.” Clarke chuckled. “Her child sounds wonderful.”

“Man I can’t believe Commander hot stuff is a mother. I’m going to have to come up with a new nick name.”

Clarke laughed. “Yeah like what?”

“Commander hot mama?”

“No.” She shook her head.

“Commander mama bear?”

“No Raven.”

“You don’t like any of the names I come up for her!”

“Because her name is Lexa.” She shoved her playfully.

“Doesn’t matter what her name is princess, the point is she is hot! Like for real when she was cutting me up I was thinking.” She held her hand to her heart dramatically. “At least I’m going to die by this oh so beautiful creature.”

Clarke giggled. “You are so dramatic!”

Raven smiled. “but seriously princess how are you?”

“I’m so happy that she is alive. I still can’t believe it. I feel like I’m going to wake up and it will all be a dream. She’s alive Raven. Lexa is alive.”

“Do you still love her?”

“I never stopped.”

“What about Bellamy?”

“Yes I love him too but it’s not the same, it’s not even close.”

“Fuck princess you should tell him.”

“I know.” She said sadly. “Lexa doesn’t want me though raven she said she is happy for me.”

“Bullshit!”

“That’s What she told me. She’s leaving tomorrow.”

“So? She will be back.”

“Hmm.” She said tiredly.

“What ever you chose you will have my support.”

“I don’t want to hurt anyone.”

“Well if Lexa is happy for you really there is Only one person who will get hurt.”

“I don’t want to hurt him. This is why I didn’t want anything with him in the first place!”

“I know” Raven said softly. “Get some sleep princess.” Raven said leaving the tent. Clarke lied down not even bothering to change and fell asleep dreaming of Lexa.

................

Clarke got up before dawn. She looked over the other side of the bed and seen Bellamy was asleep. She felt guilt in her stomach even though she hasn’t done anything wrong but with Lexa being back it changes things for her. She never really stopped loving Lexa. She realised last night that what she did with Bellamy is settle and he deserves so much more then that. She quickly made her way out before he could wake and went to the camp fire and got some breakfast for Lexa to take it to the brunettes tent. She sat outside and waited for Lexa to wake. When the brunette came through the tent Clarke was lost for words at how truely beautiful the previous Commander is. She smiled at Lexa and held up her bowl of food.

“Mochof.” Lexa smiled softly as she sat down beside Clarke. 

Clarke automatically took her hand and held it tight. “Pro.”

“Oh I forgot.” Lexa said pulling something out of her bag. She handed a photo to Clarke.

In the photo a little girl with brown wavey hair and green eyes sat in lexas lap. Both of them smiling. “This is her?”

“Sha.”

“She’s beautiful Lexa. She looks so full of life.”

Lexa smiled. “She is.”

“Can I meet her someday?”

“Sha but not here in this camp Clarke it’s too dangerous.”

Clarke frowned at Lexa. “I said I would work on it. I meant it Lexa. I would never put you or your child’s life in danger.”

“Sorry.” Lexa said. “You are very true to your word you always have been.”

She smiled at Lexa. “Polis will be great again. You will see.”

Lexa smiled as she ate.” I have no doubt.”

.................

After breakfast they both made there way to the tree line hand in hand. “So um.” Clarke said while rubbing her neck. “When will I see you again?”

“I’m not sure.” Lexa replied honestly.

“There’s a lot to do, your help would be welcomed and I know a lot of people who would want to see you again.”

“I don’t want to overstep Clarke this isn’t my life any more.”

“You wouldn’t be. How about you come back in three days?” Clarke said hopefully.

Lexa grinned. “Then there would be no point in leaving today Clarke. I’ll come back in two weeks and see how things go when I’m here.”

“Two weeks?” Lexa nodded. “That’s... that’s a long time.” She said sadly.

Lexa kissed the back of her hand and and took a step towards her. “Sha. But you will be fine right? Your not alone?”

“Oh yeah, um. Sure.”

“You would be too busy to see me anyway.”

Clarke looked at the brunette seriously and moved closer to her. “I’d always make time for you Lexa.”

Lexa pulled her in for a hug and smiled into the blondes shoulder. “I’d never take you away from your duties Clarke.”

Clarke rolled her eyes and smirked. “I think that’s my choice?”

“See you in two weeks Clarke.”

“Right. Yeah.” She said as Lexa walked off. “Bye Lexa.” She said softly.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Man this is a long chapter. I didn’t realise

When Murphy picked up Lexa half way she told him she didn’t want to talk about Clarke yet. When she walked into the bunker Madi bolted out of the her room and jumped into her arms. Lexa laughed and swung Madi around. She may not have Clarke in this lifetime but she was happy that she had Madi.

When nighttime approached Lexa put Madi to bed. Lexa stayed up most the night as she couldn’t stop thinking about the blonde. She gave up on trying to get to sleep, got up and made her way out to the living area. She heard a door open and seen Emori leaning against the door frame. Lexa looked at her concerned that maybe Emori was up late cause she wasn’t well. “Are you well?” .

Emori smiled and sat next to Lexa. “Just pregnant Heda.”

Lexa smiled and touched emori’s belly. Remembering when John jr was born. 

Flash back 

“I HATE YOU JOHN MURPHY!” Emori screamed.

Emori had been in labour for 22 hours and was half way to giving birth. Lexa sat inbween her legs having read all the books she possibly could on pregnancy and delivering a baby. Madi was waiting in the bedroom and John was sitting by Emroi’s head trying to calm her down.

He looked over to Lexa. “Lexa Get this baby out of her it’s making her evil!”

Lexa rolled her eyes and shook her head. “Emori one more push and the baby will be out.” She said calmly.

Murphy ran to Lexa to have a look. He went white in the face then passed out. Emori sat up. “Did he just faint!?.”

“Sha.”

“I’m gonna kill him!”

She chuckled. “Me too but first let’s get this goufa out Sha?”

She screamed as she gave one big push. Then there was another smaller scream. The first cry from John jnr. Lexa held the baby and then kicked John who was on the floor. He grunted and got up. He looked in awe at the little boy. “Emori? He’s beautiful.”

Lexa gave the baby to Murphy and he cried as he carried the baby to Emori. They both looked at him in awe. Lexa finished doing what she needed to to Emori, as she stood up Murphy waved her over. “Come here Heda.” He said softly. She smiled as she walked over to them both. “Look.” He said pointing at the baby. “You helped bring her here safely.” Murphy stood up and hugged her tight. “Thank you.” 

Lexa laughed and hugged him back, then slapped him upside the back of the head. “That’s for fainting.”

He smiled and rubbed the back of his head and sat back down by Emori and the baby. She was about to leave to give them some privacy and to let Madi know that the baby was happy and healthy but Emori stopped her. “Wait!” Lexa stopped and frowned at her. “Go Get Madi and both of you come in here.”

“Emori I’m not going to intrude.”

“Lexa. Your both my family.” She cried.

Lexa smiled and hurried to get Madi. When she returned Madi said beside Emori on the bed and Lexa stood behind her. “Look at us.” Emori said. “We are not the perfect family. We got the commander of blood, the little misfit survivor from the deathwave. John, claw girl and now this little terror.” She said looking lovingly at the baby boy. “I wouldn’t change it for the world. We are all we have now.”

Present.

Lexa rubbed Emori’s belly. “Murphy told me last night you had a rough one?”

“Sha But I did enjoy the day of peace.” She smiled.

“Glad I could help.”

Emori nudged Lexa’s shoulder. “Are we going to talk about what happened?”

Lexa slumped back on the chair and sighed. “There’s nothing really to talk about Emori.”

“Lexa. Come on? This is Clarke we are talking about. I watched you mourn her. I held you at night while you mourned her, and now she’s back and you say there’s nothing to tell?”

She rolled her eyes. “She’s with Bellamy now.”

“And?”

“And she seems happy?”

“Looks can be deceiving Heda.”

“She’s Happy And she’s alive that’s all I care about.”

Emori looked at her sadly. “Lexa...You’re allowed to be upset.”

“Am I?.” She sat up. “She thought I was dead. She waited five years to move on. What right do I have to be upset?”

Emori moved closer to her and wrapped her arm around her shoulders. “Because you love her stupid.”

Lexa smiled sadly. “Sha and it’s my love for her that allows me to be happy for her even though when I see Bellamy wrap his arm around her or kiss her it makes me physically sick. But it’s not about me.”

“Fine.” She sighed. “Tell me about Polis then.”

“It’s not safe. There are prisoners there that make my instincts want to put a knife thought their hearts.”

“Hmm. What else?”

“I felt out of place.” She said sadly. “I don’t think Polis is for me at this stage.”

“It could be one day.”

“I don’t think so.”

“Why?”

Lexa felt the tears pool in her eyes. “As happy as I am for Clarke I can not watch her with him on a daily basis. I can not watch them make a family. It would kill me Emori.”

“What will you do then Lex?”

“I am going back in two weeks. I’ll decide then. You Murphy and jay jay can leave all I ask is that you wait till I say it is safe.”

“Not chance we are leaving you and Madi Heda. Your both family.”

“I can’t hold you all back.”

Emori laughed. “Lex you wouldn’t be.”

.............

2 weeks later.

Clarke had kept herself busy for the last two weeks counting down the days till she seen Lexa again. 

The scouts reported what was left of the Polis tower. It was 13 stories high and the structure was still intact and solid. So the first thing Clarke ordered was to clear up the debris inside and outside the tower. The second thing was start building houses and at the same time she has been keeping her eye on the prisoners Lexa mentioned. Mia was a bit offended that Clarke thought she couldn’t handle it but she quickly got over it when Clarke told them too much was a risk. She also ordered a medical facility to be set up which made her mother beam with pride. So here she was now in her room getting ready to meet Lexa at the same tree line she seen her off at when Bellamy walked into the room.

“Hey princess.” He smiled. “You got a moment?”

“Ah.” She sighed. “I was actually going to leave to meet Lexa.”

He looked at her sadly. “So you have no time for me today?”

“Not really Bell. Indra and the ambassadors are excited to see her again and I need her opinion on some matters.”

He frowned. “You have had no time for me in the last two weeks Clarke.”

“I’ve been busy Bell. You know that.”

He huffed. “All you do is work, you barley sleep.”

She looked away guilty. She really has been busy but really only because it was the only way to keep her mind of Lexa. “Like I said I have been busy.”

“Too busy for a moment with your fiancé?”

“Bellamy.” She sighed. “I really don’t have time for this”

“When will you make time?” 

“When Lexa leaves.”

“Which is?”

“I don’t know Ok!” She snapped making him flinch. “Look.” She said softly. “I’ll make sure we have time together after Lexa leaves.” He nodded and looked away sadly. She walked over to him and kissed his cheek. “I’ll be back soon.”

“Ok.” He smiled. 

.......................

Lexa pulled up the rover at the same clearing she left at. She seen Clarke sitting against a tree and stood when she seen the car approach. Lexa felt nerves in her stomach, even after all these years it amazed her the effect the blonde had on her. She made her way out of the car and didn’t prepare herself for the impact of Clarke hugging her, she stumbled slightly.

“Shit Sorry.” Clarke held Lexa by the shoulders to make sure she didn’t fall over since she practically jumped in her arms.

Lexa held on the the blondes waist and laughed. “It’s good to see you too Clarke.”

Clarke felt butterflies in her stomach at the sound of lexas laughter. She looked the brunette up and down. She was wearing tight leather pants and a green singlet. It felt strange Lexa wearing clothes similar to that of the sky people but it looked good on her. Her hair was down and beautiful and Clarke has to hold back the sigh at the familiar scent from her hair. She smiled at the brunette and looked over Lexa’s shoulder to the rover. “It’s really strange to see you driving a car.”

“It was strange learning. Murphy taught me.”

Clarke chuckled. “Sounds like a story I need to hear.”

“Sha. It is funny now I think back on it.” She shrugged. “I might have broken Murphy’s nose a couple of times.”

Clarke laughed and grabbed the brunettes hand. “I definitely want to hear that story.” She tugged at Lexa’s hand. “Come on I have so much to show you.”

................

Clarke led Lexa to the tower. There was almost no rubble left. Lexa looked in awe. Clarke smiled at Lexa’s reaction “Eligius was a mining company so their machinery has made it easy to remove debris. It has thirteen floors now. So this will be the central place for the Commander and myself and other leaders. The elevator was repaired..” They stepped into the elevator. “When I told Raven about the tower and the fact that we would have to use the stairs as the elevator was broken she wouldn’t have that said she was too lazy to walk up thirteen flights of stairs so she has been working day and night to get it up and running again. She only got it working yesterday. The commanders room and mine are on the top floor but you will never guess what we found in one piece?”

Clarke stopped the elevator on the twelfth level and led Lexa to a room and the item made Lexa gasp. There is in front of her was the throne. 

“The throne.”

“Yup. Amazing isn’t it?”

“Sha.” She walked up to it and circled it. There were marks but it was in one piece. She felt a familiar tug to sit on the throne but thought better of it. “Amazing.” She said in awe.

“This will be where congenda business will occur.”

Lexa looked around, the room was much the same as the previous throne room. It looked more placed together though, she’s assuming that was because of Clarke’s touch. “Sha.”

“Come on?” She pulled Lexa’s hand towards the elevator again.

They got to level thirteen and Clarke led them to her room. “This is a nice room Clarke.” It was big and specious and had a queen sized bed near the balcony and a desk to the other side. In the middle of the room was a three seater lunge chair and a small table. She also had near the desk shelves filled with books and parchments. It was neat and tidy.

“Thanks.” She smiled. “There still a balcony but not much to see from it yet.”

Lexa walked over to the balcony and looked out. Polis was full of people working hard. “I think there is plenty to see.” She smiled. 

There was a knock on the door and Bellamy walked in. “Hey Lexa.”

“Bellamy.” She smiled.

“Clarke? Indra is looking for you something to do with the prisoners.”

Clarke huffed. Getting annoyed that her time with Lexa would be cut short. “Can it wait?”

He shrugged. “Sounded urgent.”

“Fine.” she looked at Lexa. “I’m sorry Lexa.” She said softly.

“It’s fine Clarke.”

Bellamy stepped forward. “I can show you around if you like Lexa?”

She smiled. “Very well.” 

Clarke looked uncertain. Bellamy rolled his eye. “We will be fine princess.”

She nodded and turned to Lexa and held her hand. “I’ll be back soon so don’t get into to much trouble.”

“I will try.”

Clarke smiled and left the room.

“So...” Bellamy said. “What has Clarke shown you?”

“Just the level twelve and thirteen so far.”

“Great! Come on I’ll take you to my favourite part of the tower.”

....................

“The kitchen?” Lexa said amused.

“What? It’s where the magic happens Lexa.”

Lexa chuckled. The door burst open “I’m starving!” Yelled Raven.

Bellamy frowned. “Who are you yelling at Raven?”

“Echo of course-“ she looked at Lexa. “Well fuck me.”

Lexa looked at her. “No thanks.”

Raven smirked. “You ARE alive?”

“Seems so.”

“Hmm. Hold on!” She ran quickly out of the room.

Bellamy shook his head. “We apologise often for Raven she’s just strange.”

“I can see that.”

They both heard bickering when Raven dragged Echo into the kitchen. “This better be good.”

“Oh it is for me!” Raven said excited.

Echo gasped as she looked at Lexa. “Heda?”

“Echo kom Azgeda. You look well”

“HA! I told you she was alive babe now you owe me cooked dinners for a week!”

Echo rolled her eyes. “Fine.” She huffed. 

Bellamy laughed at his friends. “I was just about to make some lunch and show Lexa the training grounds if you want to join us.”

Both nodded in agreement. 

..............

Raven and Bellamy lead while Lexa and Echo stayed back a bit following. “It is good to see you well Heda.” 

Lexa smiled at Echo. “I am Heda no longer but you look well too Echo.”

Echo smiled looking forward towards Raven. “Sha.”

“I must say I am surprised?”

“How so?”

“You were always allied with Queen Nia, I never would have thought of you being allied with Skaikru and being in a relationship with a sky person.”

Echo nodded. “I was always true to Azgeda. It is not my fault the queen was poisonous. I felt more loyalty towards Roan anyway.”

“And what of Roan?”

Echo sighed. “He was killed in the conclave.”

Lexa gently held her elbow and stopped her from walking. She looked Echo in her eyes. “I am truely sorry Echo. I liked him. I felt Nia only wanted What was best for her but with Roan I knew he wanted what was best for Azgeda. We talked after I beat him in the arena that day. He truely only wanted peace for his people. I am sorry for your loss.”

Echo nodded. “What’s done is done. I tried to cheat in the conclave and I got caught.” She sighed. “I was told if I left that 100 Azgeda people would be allowed in the bunker. So I did so. I thought I was going to die until I ran into Clarke, Bellamy Monty, Harper and Raven. For some reason Clarke understood the choices I made and in time everyone else did as well. I’m glad they found me and gave me a second chance and glad that Octavia and Indra stuck to blood must not have blood and I am also very glad that we all don’t have to make choices like that anymore thanks to you and thanks to Clarke.”

Lexa smiled. “I am glad too Echo kom Azgeda.” The resumed walking. “So tell me what was it like living up in the stars.”

Echo groaned. “Terrible. Worst then death.”

Lexa chuckled. “Raven made it better yes?”

“Sha.”

Raven looked over her shoulder and smiled at the interaction between Lexa and Echo. “They have both come along way.”

Bellamy looked over his shoulder too. “Yeah.”

Raven sighed. “So how are things between you and Clarke now that Lexa is back.”

He frowned at her. “The Same. Why did she say something?”

Raven looked at him sceptically. “The same?”

“She’s been busy.”

“Right.”

“She has!”

Raven held up her hands. “I believe you Bellamy.”

“I trust Clarke.”

“Good she’s given you no reason why you shouldn’t.”

“Then What was with that question?”

“Come on Bell. This is Lexa we are talking about. LEXA. I’m not saying Clarke will be unfaithful and from what I hear Lexa isn’t like that either but this must be effecting your relationship in someway. Shit. She was completely in love with her and she thought she was dead and now she’s back. Come on Blake ?”

He sighed. “And she loves me. The only thing effecting our relationship is her need to continually keep working herself to the bone.” He shook his head. “Is it weird that it’s not effecting me. It should right?”

“It’s a bit strange? Aren’t you worried?”

Bellamy frowned thinking of his answer. “I’m not worried Clarke will be unfaithful, I’m sad that she might leave me but I don’t know.” He shrugged. “It feels like I should be sadder and I should hate Lexa.” He looked over his shoulder to Lexa who was laughing at something Echo said. “But I like her. She’s nice.”

They stopped at the training grounds. “Yeah She is. Look you need to talk to her not just about how much she’s working but you have to talk about Lexa. Those feeling don’t just disappear Bellamy and you really need to have a good think about what your feeling too.”

“Ok.” He nodded. “I will.” 

Lexa caught up to Bellamy and Raven. In the training grounds she seen Octavia. She had the Commander sash on and red paint across her eyes. Octavia caught Lexa’s eye and approached the group. “Brother.” She drawled. “The Commander of blood.”

Lexa smirked. “Lexa is Fine.”

“Hmm.” Octavia looked her up and down. “Are you in the mood for a spar?”

Lexa shrugged and was about to agree but a warrior came up beside her. “Red queen? I’m sorry to interrupt but Indra and Wanheda need you urgently.”

Octavia rolled her eyes and looked at Lexa. “Another time?”

“Sha.” Lexa couldn’t help but notice the anger and sadness Octavia held in her eyes. “Another time Octavia Kom skaikru.”

Everyone froze around her. Octavia glared at her. “People call me Queen or red Queen.”

Lexa shrugged. “I’m not most people.”

Octavia smiled. “I guess not. Next time?”

“Sha.”

As she walked off Raven shook her head in shock. “Everyone seen that right? Wasn’t just me?”

Bellamy nodded with tears in his eyes.

Lexa looked at them strangely. “Did I miss something?”

Echo sighed. “That was the first time Octavia has smiled in a long time.”

Bellamy cleared his throat. “Six years.”

............................

It had been hours since Lexa last seen Clarke. She was starting to think she wouldn’t see her before she left. After going to the training grounds Bellamy bought her back to the tower so she could look over the maps that Clarke made. She added a couple of improvements. She still felt lost in the city of Polis. Even on the training grounds that used to be her sanctuary. It didn’t feel the same like there was something missing. She’s now standing on the balcony trying to think of what the missing link is. She thought back to her time as Heda and living in Polis. Some of her greatest memories were here. She remembered training as a nightblood and sneaking out of the tower with her nightblood brothers and sisters. She smiled thinking that her nightbloods did the same. Thinking of them even after all these years makes her sad. Aden would have made a fine Commander. Her was fair and just. He used to always visit her before night and they would read together. He loved learning about the old world and found the Skaikru very interesting. He was so excited when he found out that Clarke had been bought to Polis. He was like an excited puppy. 

She sighed thinking of the blonde. It was here in Polis that she first got to introduce Clarke into her world. After the first week of her being bought to Polis and after making Skaikru the 13th clan Clarke had finally let Lexa show her around. Clarke made Lexa feel good. Feel something and then it hit her. Lexas eyes widened in realisation. The missing link was Clarke. Polis didn’t feel the same as Clarke was not hers. She wasn’t her partner in political business. She didn’t come to Lexa’s room late at night just to sit and be in her company. She didn’t get to tell Lexa stories of herself and the Skaikru. That was all Bellamy’s now. She looked behind her at the bed that she knew Clarke and Bellamy shared. It made her feel sick. Being here made her feel useless. She still loved the blonde and the blonde was going to get bonded. She chuckled sadly at how pathetic she was being. She started to question why she came back in the first place. Oh but she knew why. Because Clarke had asked her too and Lexa always always could not say no to her. She sat down on the balcony and thought of their first time together. It was special to Lexa. It felt like it was special to Clarke too. So maybe the brunette thought just maybe that’s all she has of Clarke. The memories and that one special day were they were not leaders, she was not Heda nor Clarke wanheda. They were simply just Lexa and Clarke. 

She heard the door open and looked up to see Bellamy smiling down at her. “Hi.” 

“Heya.” She smiled back. 

“Sorry I tried to find Clarke but she’s really busy.”

“It is Fine. I don’t expect Clarke or anyone to neglect their duties for me.”

“She would though.” He shrugged. 

“I would never ask her to.”

He sat down beside her and watched as the people of Polis worked hard. “Amazing isn’t it.” 

“Yes.” she smiled. “This is all I ever wanted. Unity. It’s all Clarke wanted as well.” She frowned realising that maybe referring to Clarke as her partner in anything to Clarke fiancé probably wasn’t appropriate she didn’t even know if Bellamy knew of their relationship. “Sorry.” She said looking away from him.

He bumped her shoulder. “Hey It’s Ok.” He said softly. “I know you and her were together. I mean Clarke is my soon to be wife but she is also my best friend. She has told me about her previous lovers.” He chuckled. “Not that there was many. Just you Finn and Niylah.”

Lexa frowned She knew about Finn. She knew Clarke loved him but she had no idea who Niylah was. “Niylah? Did she go to space with you all.”

He shook his head. “No no. Clarke meant after the mountain and then I believe they were together briefly when the world was ending.” He shrugged.

Lexa felt her heart beat faster. She swallowed the lump in her throat. The deathwave hit only a month after she was shot. With in that time Clarke thought she was dead she had already moved on. All in four weeks. “Oh.” She croaked. She felt the tears well in her eyes and she couldn’t help it when they started falling.

“Shit!” Bellamy said facing her. “Fuck...What did I say? Please don’t cry?”

She wiped the tears away. “I must apologise Bellamy kom Skaikru being a mother has made me soft.”

He shook his head and held her shoulder. “No no don’t apologise. Why are you crying? What did I say? I’m so sorry I upset you?”

“It’s nothing.” She lied. She had foolishly believed that Clarke cared for her but now she thought otherwise and it hurt more then words could describe.

“Lexa?” Bellamy said softly. “Please tell me what I said?”

She smiled through her tears. “I am a fool Bellamy. That is not your fault. That is mine.”

“What? I don’t understand. Why are you a fool?”

“It matters not now.” She sighed. “I would like to go home to my family.” She stood on wobbly legs still not able to stop the tears.

Bellamy ran in front of her and held her shoulders. “Please Lexa. Please tell me what I said so I can fix it.”

She held his hand over his that was lying on her shoulder. “Your a good man Bellamy. I am glad Clarke has you but you can not fix this.”

He swallowed the lump. “Then at least tell me what I said?”

She nodded and looked away embarrassed that she was standing in front of this man crying like an infant. She sighed. “I thought that I was something special to Clarke. I was wrong and that’s ok.”

“Ok.” He took a deep breath. “What did I say to make you think that.”

She sat on the edge on the desk and wiped away the tears. “You know I have been in love twice in my life. Once with a girl named Costia who was murdered because she loved me. When she was taken from me I swore off love. I became hard and ruthless. But then.” She smiled. “Then the sky fell.” Bellamy nodded and sat down next to her. “And then Clarke walked into my tent and in that very moment with just one look from her my walls started breaking. When I first kissed Clarke it was the first time in 4 years that I had kissed anyone. When I first was with Clarke intimately it was the first time in four years and I thought it was special, but Clarke she waited what? Four weeks?” She sighed. “I realise now that it was just one sided.”

Bellamy jumped from the desk. “No!” He shook his head frantically. “No she loved you Lexa. Fuck! I’m so sorry!”

“It’s ok.” She stood. “I will be ok.”

“No!” He said again. “Look I can prove that she loved you Lexa! She has books and books of drawings!” He walked around the room frantically looking. “Where the hell are they!” He said in frustration. “She only draws things that are important to her. People that are important and you.” He pointed at Lexa. “Are in three quarters of them!” She wiped the tears not believing him and pulled out the photo of her and Madi. She smiled down at it and placed it on Clarke’s desk. He turned around. “What is that?” He pointed to the photo. 

She shrugged. “Something to remember me by.” She smiled softly at him.

“Nope.” He shook his head. “No no no. You can wait till Clarke gets back and talk about his.”

“There is no need.”

“Fuck!” He sighed. “I can’t be the reason why you leave.” He said sadly. 

“Your not. I came to the conclusion before you came in the room.”

“Lexa please please wait for Clarke?”

“It is time I left now anyway.” She wiped away her tears. “Take care of her.”

Bellamy’s shoulders slumped in defeat. He nodded. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” She held out her hand for him to take. He did and gripped firmly. “May we meet again Bellamy.”

He held back his tears. “May we meet again.” He repeated and bought her in for a hug. She hugged him back then left the room. “Fuck!”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of my fav chapters. Bit angsty. You have ben warned.

Clarke hurried to the tower. She was pissed. The one day she took off, the one day she kept open for Lexa, the one day she was happy not to work and she had been called to deal with the prisoners. It was nearly dark which means Lexa would be leaving soon and in her head she was thinking of all the ways she could possibly get the brunette to stay the night. She ran into the tower and basically ignored everyone in her passing to get to the elevator. When she got there she leant against the wall trying to catch her breath. When the elevator got to her floor she jumped out before the door could even open all the way and ran to her room pushing the doors open with a huff. She expected to see Lexa but instead she was meant with Bellamy who was pacing. He turned to look at her with bloodshot eyes. “Bell?”

“Clarke. I fucked up.” 

She looked around the room and seen no sign of the brunette. “What did you do? Where is Lexa?”

He ran his hands through this hair. “We were talking and I- we were having a heart to heart.”

“Bellamy! What did you do!”

“I told her you were with Niylah. Before the deathwave.” Clarke stumbled backwards. “I’m so sorry Clarke. Fuck! I made her cry!”

“You what?” 

“She thinks you didn’t love her and it was one sided.”

“Did you correct her!”

“Of course! I even tried to find the drawings you made of her but I couldn’t find them anywhere!” 

“Where is she?”

“She left ten minutes ago. She said she wanted to go home.”

Clarke bolted out of the bedroom and didn’t even bother with the elevator, she ran down thirteen flights of stairs. She had to see her before she left. She had to explain. “Fuck!” She Yelled As she got to the first floor and ran out the Polis tower. Again she ignored everyone in her passing. She had to get to Lexa she just hoped she wasn’t too late. 

She sprinted to the clearing and seen the Jeep. She felt tears come to her eyes. She wasn’t too late. “Lexa!” . The brunette was putting her bag in the back of the car. Clarke noticed her beautiful green eyes were bloodshot and swollen. She froze when she heard Clarke’s voice. “You going to leave without saying goodbye?” Clarke leant against the tree trying to catch her breath. Trying not to cry at the heartbroken face of the previous Commander.

“You have been busy.” Lexa said softly turning towards the blonde.

Clarke approached her. “I know I’m sorry about that. I had a whole day planned for us. Indra wanted to see and you, the ambassadors are eager to see you as well. I wanted to show you the plans for the medical centre and the school I’m having built. There was so much I wanted to do today but mostly.” She said taking a step closer. “Mostly I just wanted to spend time with you.”

Lexa looked away and tried to discreetly wipe away her tears. “It’s fine. It’s late now so I’m going to go home.”

Clarke moved forward and held Lexa’s hand. “This is your home Lexa.”

“No-“ 

“I know what Bellamy told you!” She blurted out. “And I know what you must be thinking but I can explain.” 

Lexa shook her head. “You don’t owe me anything.” Backing away.

Clarke pulled the other woman’s hand so she would come closer her but Lexa gently pulled back and stepped away. “Lexa please. Come back to the tower. We can talk. Stay another night.”

“No Clarke.” She sighed. “I want to go home.”

“But this is-”

Lexa cupped Clarke’s cheek gently cutting her off. “You are the leader of these people now. This is your life Clarke.” She croaked. “But it is not mine.”

Clarke placed her hand over Lexa’s that was on her cheek and cried. “Please Lexa.” She grabbed her hand and put it against her chest. “Please don’t go like this.” She looked desperately in the green eyes. “Don’t leave me again.” she breathed out. 

Lexa tried to take back her hand but the blonde had a good grip on her so she stepped into Clarke’s space and lent her forehead on hers with their hands trapped between them. “I’m happy for you. Bellamy is a good man.”

“Lexa-“

Lexa shook her head cutting her off. She placed her free hand on the back of Clarke’s neck rubbing her thumb trying it calm down the blonde. “He’s a good man and he will give you what ever you desire. How ever many children you want to bare. He will be by your side till the day you die and that makes me happy. You have finally got what you have always wanted.”

“No.” She cried kissing the back of her hand. “Not everything. This is about Niylah but I can explain!”

Lexa stepped back but Clarke still had a grip on her hand. “It’s not just that.” She pulled her hand free and made her way to the car but Clarke wrapped her arms around the brunettes waist and pulled her flush against her front. 

“No you can’t leave like this. Not after all this time. I won’t let you.”

“Clarke... “ she took a shuddering breath. “Let go.”

“No.” She cried into the back of Lexa’s shoulder. Clarke knew that she was losing this battle so she tried what she was good at. Bargaining. “No I’m going to fix Polis I’m going to make it safe for you and Madi to live in. She can go to school here and there is a medical facility being built, you will both get the best care. You will see!” Lexa shook her head and unwrapped Clarke’s arms from her waist. Clarke turned the brunette pinned her against the car. “Your not leaving like this!” She said angrily. “Talk to me please!” She pleaded. When the brunette didn’t respond Clarke realised she was running out of options, she tried reasoning she tried bargaining and she tried pleading. Now she would try threatening even though it’s not what she wanted. She just didn’t want Lexa to go. “If you leave like this I’ll have you arrested!” Lexa still didn’t respond, the only response She was getting was tears from the brunettes eyes. “You hear me Lexa. I’ll have you arrested.” She sobbed. Clarke buried her head into lexas neck and cried. She unpinned Lexa and just slumped into her against the car, sobs wracking her body. Lexa held her up and hugged her tight. There was one thing she could try. So she started leaving feather light kisses against the side of Lexa’s neck. But Lexa gently pushed her back and shook her head. She opened the car door got in and closed the door behind her. Clarke hoped up on the step and cupped Lexa’s cheek wiping away the tears. “Please Lexa? Come back? I’ll do anything you want me too. Name it.”

Lexa kissed the inside of the blondes hand and smiled at her. “Be Happy Clarke.” Lexa started the car. “Mebi oso na hit choda op nodotaim.” (May we meet again)

Clarke jumped down in defeat and cried watching the woman she loved drive away. She fell to the floor and buried her head in her knees.


	9. Chapter 9

When Clarke returned to the tower she walked right past Bellamy to get into the bathroom. She needed to wash away the day. She couldn’t seem to stop crying and it was making her angry. She knows Bellamy will want to talk about it but what is she suppose to tell him. That’s she’s still madly in love with Lexa even though she suppose to marry him. She entered the bathtub and let the hot water relax her muscles. Thinking about the hurt look on Lexa’s face made her bring her knees to her chest and cry.

When she left the bathroom Bellamy was sitting on the bed being comforted by Raven. They both looked up towards her. 

Raven stood up. “Bell told me what happened.”

Bellamy stood up too. “I swear I didn’t mean to hurt her.”

Clarke chuckled sadly and wiped her eyes. “You didn’t hurt her Bellamy. I did.”

Raven shook her head. “You did nothing wrong princess. Did you explain.”

“Nope.” Clarke said as she walked to the cabinet in her room and poured herself a shot of Monty’s moonshine. She drunk it and poured herself another. “She was too busy you know with her heartbreaking and all to allow me to explain.” She threw back another drink. She looked at Bellamy. “What gave you the right to talk to others about my past?! About my ex lovers?”

He flinched at Clarke’s tone. “I didn’t think it was a big deal.”

Clarke laughed as she took another shot. “Mmm Hmm. How interesting.” She mocked. “Maybe I should go around telling everyone how you fucked half the  
Girls in the original hundred. INCLUDING Raven Reyes...... “ She pointed at the mechanic and took another shot. “No big deal right? Does Echo know that Raven? Does Echo know you fucked Bellamy? Huh?”

Raven looked at her friend with pity. “I know your hurt and angry but maybe drinking right now and lashing out at us isn’t the way to go about this.”

That made Clarke laugh feeling the alcohol running through her veins. 

Bellamy looked at her sadly. “I’m going to go.” He paused at the door and looked over his shoulder. “I’m really sorry Clarke.” Then left.

The blonde sat back in her office chair. “See ya.” She held up another shot and drunk it.

Raven looked at her angrily. “He didn’t mean to hurt her or you Clarke.”

Clarke rolled her eyes and noticed a photo sitting on her desk. She picked it up and ran her fingers over it. She felt the tears run down her face. She knows Lexa must have left it here for her. She ran her finger of Lexa’s and then the little girls, a family she will never know. She started crying and threw the photo down on the desk and took another shot. “This is all your fault!” She yelled pointing at Raven.

Raven looked at her shocked. “What? Are you insane?”

Clarke stood up and stumbled a bit the alcohol already effecting her. “I told you I wasn’t ready! I told you I was still in love with her! But you insisted! you told me to move on!” 

“Yeah Clarke cause I thought she was dead!”

“If I hadn’t of listened to you I would be with her right now!”

Raven had enough. She snatched the bottle from Clarke. “I’m sorry I didn’t want to see you waste away to nothing! I just wanted my friend back! But don’t blame me princess. Do not blame me for Lexa leaving. I didn’t make you sleep with Niylah and I’m not making you stay with Bellamy right now. If you don’t love him then tell him! If you don’t want to marry him then damn well fucking tell him!”

She screamed and threw the cup against the wall making it smash. “Float you!”

Raven got up in her face. “Yeah float you too! And don’t EVER bring up me sleeping with Bellamy again! I have tried to forget about that disturbing shit for the last six years!”

Both woman looked at each other. They were both breathing heavily. The blonde took a deep breath then laughed with Raven joining her. “I’m sorry.” She said as she started sobbing.

Raven hugged her tight. “Fuck princess. You should just tell Bell.”

“I already broke one heart today I don’t want to break another.”

“He deserves to know.”

“I know.” She said sadly. “What am I going to do?”

“I don’t know.” She sighed. “Follow your heart and all that shit.”

Clarke chuckled. “My heart has always been with her.”

“I know princess.”

“I never thought I’d see her again. And she’s here on earth. Alive. With a daughter who I’ll never meet, with a family I’ll never be a part of and that hurts more then the thought of her being dead. This hurts.” She cried into her friends shoulder.

“I know” Raven sighed and held her friend. “I know.” She repeated softly.

...................

It was now night and Clarke was sitting at her desk drawing. She drew a picture of Lexa’s heartbroken face as she drove off. 

Knock knock.

Clarke sighed and got up from her chair. She answered the door and was surprised to see Octavia. 

“Clarke.” Octavia said as she brushed past her. “I haven’t been in here before.”

“No well you haven’t been to a lot of your old friends Octavia.”

Octavia glared at her. “It’s Queen.”

“I’ll never call you that.” Clarke rolled her eyes sitting at her desk. “Not while we are alone together anyways.”

Octavia shrugged. “So.” She said standing by Clarke’s desk. “The prisoners need to be killed.”

She sighed. “Yeah I know.”

Octavia picked up the drawing that Clarke just finished of Lexa. “Bellamy told me what happened.”

“Your brother has a big mouth.” She snapped,

Octavia scoffed. “Yet your engaged to him?” She said placing the picture down and picking up another.

“Are you here for a reason Octavia?”

“Can you hold everything together for a week or so?”

“Why?”

“Can you or not?”

“Yes but why?”

“I’m going on a trip.”

Clarke stood. “What! Where!”

Octavia shrugged and pointed to the picture of Lexa. “Gonna find the commander of blood.”

Clarke took a deep breath and rounded the desk getting up in Octavia’s face. “If you hurt her I swear-“

Octavia laughed cutting her off. “Don’t want to hurt her princess. Just want to talk.”

“What the hell about!”

“That’s really not your business.”

“Anything to do with Leksa kom trikru is MY business.”

Octavia tilted her head. “She’s not yours. You have no say.”

“Octavia.” Clarke warned. “I’m not joking.”

Octavia shrugged. “I only spoke to her briefly and I like her. She’s the only one I have meant in the last six years who’s not afraid of me so I’m going to go find her.”

“To do what?”

Octavia smirked. “Wouldn’t you like to know.”

Clarke face fell. “Octavia. She’s in a vulnerable place right now-“

“Yeah I know she found out that you fucked Niylah after she was apparently killed.”

“Fuck Bellamy!” She looked at Octavia pleadingly. “Please O, you use to be my friend once.”

Octavia softened and sighed. “Clarke I just want to talk to her. That’s it. I have no one here-.”

“That’s not tr-“

“Yes it is!” Octavia snapped. “I need this. I need to know what else is out there I need to speak to someone who might understand. I need to know everything that I have done in the last six years was worth it.” She leaned on the desk. “I’m miserable Clarke. I hate feeling like this and She made me smile, it felt nice.”

Clarke smiled. “Yeah.” She said sitting next to her. “She has that effect on people. When I was first bought to Polis all those years ago I came across the old woman I don’t know if Lincoln told you about her. Her nick name was crazy crissy.”

“Yeah I remember actually. He mentioned something about her.”

“Hmm well she was this old lady, she had to have been in her 80s and people told me that when the mountain took her husband and her son she lost her mind and she was never the same again. Her family was one of the first ones missing to the mountain and the Heda at the time took pity on her and allowed her to stay in Polis. All she did all day was mumble and speak nonsense and yell and scream at anyone who walked by her, including me.”

“Let me guess you tried to help.”

Clarke chuckled. “Yes, I walked up to her and she was hurling abuse at me in trig then hit me with her walking stick right on my forehead, gave me a bruise and a bump for a week straight. But me being a daughter of a doctor wouldn’t walk away so I came back every day and watched from afar and every single person for a week that walked passed her was yelled out, or had something thrown at them. Even children!”

“Really.”

“Yeah. All but one. It had been a week and I had been sitting on my usual spot watching from a far when I seen Lexa was going to walk past. Cause I was angry at her I couldn’t wait to see what the old woman was going to do to her.” She chuckled. “So I’m sitting on the edge of my seat waiting till Lexa got closer and closer to walking past crazy crissy and I had the biggest grin on my face waiting to see what would happen and then Lexa walked in the line of sight of the old bat.”

“So what happened?”

“Lexa sat beside her?”

“What?”

“Yup. Sat right down next to her.”

“And the old woman did nothing?”

“She talked. She sat there and talk for a good hour and Lexa sat there and listened intently. Nodding her head and then after the old woman was finished Lexa said something to her and then she burst out and laughter.”

“Really?”

“Yup.”

“What the hell. What was so special about Lexa?”

“That’s what I wanted to know. So when Lexa was done I followed her and asked her. I had to know.”

“What she say?”

Clarke smiled sadly.

Flashback.

“The old lady has a name Klark. Her name is kristin and she’s not crazy.”

“Lexa. I watched her for a week! Something is wrong with her and you just walked up to her and she did nothing but talk and she even laughed.”

“So?”

“So what the hell did you talk about.”

Lexa shrugged. “I didn’t talk.”

“What was she saying.”

“I’m not sure.”

“What the hell do you mean your not sure! You just sat with her for an hour!”

Lexa rolled her eyes. “What I mean is she wasn’t making any sense.”

Clarke shook her head. “I don’t understand.”

“No you don’t. Because you see what you want to like the rest of Polis. You see a crazy old woman who has nothing to do with her time but hurl abuse at people who pass her.”

“And what do you see Lexa?” She asked softly.

“I see a woman who has lost everything that means something to her. I see a woman who is in pain every minute she breathes. I see the strongest most resilient person and all the lands and.” She poked Clarke’s bump. “I see a woman with excellent aim.” Clarke frowned and rubbed her sore spot. “One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say.” She shrugged. “Even if it doesn’t make sense or you don’t agree.”

Present.

“Wow.” Octavia said in awe. “She is something isn’t she.”

Clarke smiled. “You have no idea.” She shook her head. “What will you do when you find her?”

“Don’t know. I just want to get away from here Clarke I need a break.”

Clarke nodded. “Can you tell her-“

“Nope.” She shook her head. “I’m not getting involved in your love life princess.”

Clarke nodded. “I understand.”

“Great. So can you keep shit together?”

The blonde looked at the floor sadly. “Yeah.”

Octavia stood up and sighed looking at the blonde. She really did look lost. Octavia felt for her. Despite everything that has happened over the last six years Clarke was her friend. Her co leader. She was part of the original 100 and she new that Clarke was tough but looking at the blonde now she didn’t see a strong person she seen a person who was barely put together. So Octavia pushed aside her anger she felt at the world and walked to the blonde. She placed her hand on her friends shoulder and squeezed slightly making the blonde look up to her. “What are you afraid of?” Clarke looked at her confused by the question. “You have always faced your battles head on and you let Lexa leave.”

“What? No.” She shook her head. “I asked her to stay-“

“You didn’t go after her?”

“She-was. She-“

“Cut the crap. I can see right through it. It’s only us in here princess.” Clarke stood up brushing of Octavia’s hand. “I’ll ask again. What are you afraid of.”

Clarke turned with tears in her eyes. “I’m afraid I’ll lose my best friend.”

“Yeah no that’s no it. You have never been afraid of tell my brother how it is. Try again.”

The blonde huffed. “I just told you-“

Octavia scoffed. “Coward.”

Clarke walked up in her face. “I am not a coward.” 

Octavia smirked. “Then What are you afraid of.” She shoved the blonde. “Coward.”

Clarke grunted and pushed her back. “Nothing!” Octavia got her in head lock but the blonde elbowed her in the stomach. “Float you!” She stood up with tears in her eyes. 

Octavia stood up straight. “What are you afraid of?”

Clarke bent at her knees and sobbed. “I’m not good enough.” She took a deep breath. “I’m not fucking good enough for her, for them! Polis isn’t good enough for them! She has a family! A child! And I’m not good enough!”

Octavia shook her head and chuckled. She moved into the blondes space. “Them get good princess. Or you will lose her.” She walked past her and looked over her shoulder. “Again.”

Clarke watch her leave and knew what she had to do.

.....................

Clarke stood at Bellamy bedroom door. She took a deep breath and knocked. “Come in.” She heard Bellamy say. He smiled softly at her from his desk. She smiled back sadly and took in his appearance, he hasn’t shaved, he has bags under his eyes and he looks sad. She sat down on the other side of the desk with a frown. “I know you must hate me.” He started.

“I don’t.” She answered quickly. “I don’t hate you Bellamy.”

He lent forward on the desk. “You have barley spoken to me. You have barley let me touch you. You come to bed late and sleep so far away from me I often think you are going to fall flat on your face.” He smiled slightly.

Clarke looked away guilty. Ever since Lexa came back It didn’t feel right him touching her at nighttime so she would purposely come to bed late knowing he would be fast asleep. Sometimes she even slept in other places, like the spare rooms they have in the Polis tower that have yet to be filled. “Bell....”

“Clarke. Please? Are we over?” He looked at her desperately.

She looked at him with tears in her eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“You used to be able to tell me anything.”

“I still can.”

“But you won’t.” He held her hand over the desk. “So I’ll ask you questions and I know you will be honest with me. Cause that’s how we work.” She nodded. “Are you still in love with Lexa?”

She squeezed his hand. “I never stopped loving her.”

He nodded and swallowed the lump in his throat. “If you had of known she was alive would you have been with me?”

She took a deep breath. “No.” She said softly. 

He nodded and pulled his hand back. “Did you see any type of future with me at all?” She nodded. “Would you have been happy?”

“I would have been satisfied.” She looked away guilty. “But my love for her would always be there. I felt when she died, or when I thought she died a piece of me died with her. I told you that when we first got together.”

“I know.” He said sadly. “I just thought over time we would fall in love like you did with her.”

She shook her head and wiped her eyes. “Some people do that. Fall in love over time. It wasn’t like that with her. I walked into her tent and took one look at her and I knew... I just knew that she was the one. Before she even spoke to me.” She wiped away more tears. “I was in denial about it. Told myself and told her it was too soon. But it wasn’t soon enough. I just wanted to be with her all the time. I trusted her fully and that’s why it hurt when she left me at the mountain. She broke my heart, Even though I understood why. It hurt like hell. I was so angry when she had me bought to Polis. But I wasn’t at the same time.” She chuckled. “I know that doesn’t make sense but it was like my mind told me I should be angry at her I should hate her and never trust her again but my heart had other plans. It just didn’t want to do those things. It took a week but when I settled down she showed me around Polis.” Clarke smiled at the memory and looked out the window. “Ever since then I wished that I had stopped wasting time and just been with her.”

He smiled at sadly at her through his tears. “Then what are you doing now?”

She frowned at him. “What?”

“What are you doing still wasting time?”

“Bellamy....”

“It’s ok.” He said as tears rolled down his cheeks. “I love you Clarke your my best friend.” He sniffled.

“I love you Bellamy but...”

“But I’m not her.”

“Yeah.” She cried. “I’m so sorry.”

He got up and walked around the desk pulling her to her feet and hugging her to his chest. She cried because she really didn’t want to hurt him. “I’m sorry too. We will be ok. You should fight for her Clarke. You should be happy. You deserve it.”

She pulled back and wiped her eyes. “What about you?”

He smiled. “I’m ok.” He took a deep shaky breath. “This feels right. Doesn’t it?”

“Yeah.” She smiled at him. “I’m still sorry.”

“Those things you said about Lexa I think.” He shook his head. “No I know I felt the same for Gina and I don’t want to hurt you either but if she walked through that door right now.” He pointed to the bedroom door. “I know what I’d do.”

She nodded. “Maybe we both settled cause we are best friends.”

“I think so princess.”

“I don’t know what to do Bell.”

He held her shoulders. “What do you want to do?”

“Find her.”

“Then do it..What’s stopping you?”

“She said she didn’t want to be here.”

Bellamy laughed. “Clarke when have you ever listened to anyone.” She pushed him and smiled. “She said that stuff because she thinks you don’t love her. You need to find her and talk to her about this Niylah stuff. Make her listen. Your good at making people listen.”

She shook her head. “Lexa is happy with her family, she’s happy Where’s she’s living. I’m going to fix up Polis first, I’m going to make it safe. Then I’ll find her and ask her to come back but not for me but because she wants too. I’m not going to stand in the way of her happiness.”

“What about your happiness?”

“Honestly.” She smiled. “I’m just happy she’s alive.”

He hugged her. “Me too.” She pulled back and looked at her. “I know you’re going to throw yourself into work Clarke but just promise me you will eat and stay hydrated.”

“I promise.”

.........................

Lexa had cried the whole way back to the bunker. The image of Clarke falling to the ground crying as she was driving away would forever be burned into her memory. When she arrived it was late at night as she had to stop multiple times to catch her breath and wipe the tears from her face. As soon as she opened the door Emori and John jumped from the chair and knew from the look of Lexa that things didn’t go well. They both held her on the lounge chair while she cried herself to sleep. She didn’t tell them anything, she wasn’t ready.

When morning came around Lexa woke to the smell of a freshly cooked breakfast. She sat up and seen Emori in the kitchen. Emori smiled and bought over a plate. No words were needed, she just sat next to Lexa rubbing her back trying to get her to eat. Murphy had taken the children swimming to give Lexa some space. She appreciated it.

When night came Lexa read Madi a story and watched her as she slept. She was sad that Clarke would never get to meet Madi. She kissed her on the temple and made her way out to the living area where John was sitting watching a movie.

“What are you watching?” 

“A movie called dirty dancing.” He shrugged. “I thought it would be all about sex but it’s about dancing. Such a bummer...” 

Lexa chuckled and sat down beside Him. He paused the movie and turned towards her. “What happened?”

She sighed. “I decided Polis isn’t for me.”

“Yeah and what else?”

“Murphy...”

“You looked terrible yesterday Lex. Something else happened and I’m guessing it has to do with the princess.”

She rubbed her eyes. Talking about it just made it more real. “I found out that Clarke slept with some woman shortly after she thought I was dead.”

“What!”

“It’s fine.”

He stood up and started pacing. “God Damn it Lexa! Stop saying it’s fine and that your fine! When it’s not fine at all!”

She sighed and lent back in the chair. “What would you like me to do Murphy?”

“Get angry or something!”

“Why? I can not change Clarke’s feelings. I can’t make her unlove bellamy and I can’t undo what happened six years ago. Getting angry is pointless.”

He sat next to her. “What do you mean change Clarke’s feelings?”

“She clearly doesn’t or didn’t I should say, feel the same as me.”

“Bullshit. Look the princess isn’t perfect Lex. You didn’t see her after she thought you were dead. I did. She was mourning you, anyone could see that! She loved you.”

Lexa shook her head. “It matters not now.” She said sadly. “Polis doesn’t feel like home anymore.”

“Ok.”

“But I would never stop you, Emori and Jay Jay from ever going there.”

“Is it safe?”

“Not yet. But it will be. Clarke will make it safe.”

“We aren’t leaving you Lexa.”

“And I’m not holding you back.”

“From what? Your my family! This.” He pointed around the room. “The people here are my family. The first ones I have had all my damn life and I’m not giving it up for anything.”

She smiled at him. “Me too.”

“Your like a sister to me Lexa.” He shook his head. “I will go to Polis when and if you are ready and I know that Emori feels the same.”

“Your like a brother to me too. You are my brother.” She chuckled. “When I first told Clarke about Madi she asked if you were the father.”

Murphy fell back on the chair clutching his stomach as he laughed. “That. Is . Disgusting.”

She picked up a pillow and hit him with it. “Sha.”

When he stopped laughing he took a deep breath and held lexas hand. “Are you going to be ok.”

She shrugged. “Yes I suppose. She didn’t want me to leave.” She gulped. “She cried and begged me to stay. She even tried telling me she would arrest me if I left.” She chuckled and wiped her eyes. “But it’s for the best. She can have the life she always wanted with Bellamy. She can make Polis great again. She WILL make Polis great again and I think she just wanted me to stay because she felt obligated.”

“Lexa that’s insane. I don’t know her well but I’m telling you. I’m telling you she loved you. That love doesn’t just fizzle out and die.”

“Brother. If she loved me she would not have bed another so quickly. She barley mourned.”

“Look I’ll stand by your decision but your wrong. You are so very wrong to think that. I was there Lex. I seen how much she was hurting.”

“It’s fine.” She sniffled. “I just want to concentrate on being the best mother and aunt I can be. She has her life now and I have mine.” 

He groaned. “Let’s watch this damn movie.”


	10. Chapter 10

Lexa was sitting on a rock by the water. Emori and John took the kids hunting to give her time to herself. It had been a few days since she left Polis. There hasn’t been a moment that has gone by where she hasn’t thought about Clarke in some way. She would wake up and thinks it would be nice if Clarke was here. She eats breakfast and thinks that Clarke would like this and that. She goes fishing and thinks about a time where Clarke first came to Polis and ate her first fish. Now she’s sitting by the water remembering when she first really opened up to the blonde.

Flashback Ton Dc after the bombs.

Lexa left her tent and told her warriors to leave her be. She felt like she let her people down but knew in the long run it was for the best letting the bombs drop. The mountain had to be stopped. She decided that what she needed was a walk and her destination was a lake near Ton Dc. On her way there her mind kept wandering to that of blonde hair and blue eyes. 

When she got to that lake she noticed a lone figure sitting but the water. It was Clarke and she had her knees to her chest. Lexa didn’t know what to do. She could see that blonde girl was clearing crying. Titus often tells her ‘crying is weakness’ but she couldn’t help feel a tug in her heart at the sight of the blonde. So she walked up to her and sat down silently. The blonde looked at her but Lexa paid no attention she didn’t want to make her feel uncomfortable. So she sat silently trying not to think of all the people that were killed and injured in Ton Dc and Every now and then she could hear the blonde sniffle.

“Do you care?” She hear the blonde say softly.

Lexa sighed and swallowed the lump in her throat. She turned to look at the blonde. “What you must think of me Clarke Kom Skaikru.” She looked away from the blonde so she didn’t see the water pool to her eyes. “You must think I am a monster like pauna.”

“You show no emotion.” The blonde scoffed.

“No. I don’t. My people need me to be strong for them besides, I have been here to many times.”

“Where?”

“Siting. Thinking about the loss of my people due to the mountain men.”

“We killed them!”

“No we didn’t.” The brunette replied calmly. “The mountain men did and have been for centuries. You act as though your people are the only ones but you wouldn’t understand. Not in the slightest.” She stood up and shook her head at the blonde. “I foolishly believed you might but clearly I was wrong.” She went to walk away but the blonde grabbed her hand and stopped her.

“Wait!” She said panicked. “Just. Wait.”

Lexa huffed and sat back down beside her again. “You think I’m heartless, if I was so heartless then I would have warned the people of Ton dc.”

“What?” Clarke said confused. “That doesn’t make sense Lexa.”

“I am Heda, it is my duty to protect my people from any threat. The biggest threat to our way of life is the mountain men. They have been harvesting our people, taking our children, sending fire from the sky! I must eliminate that threat. I must protect them.” She took a deep breath. “Ton Dc is a small village. If I didn’t have a heart I would have warned them then the mountain men would have known that there was a inside man the only leverage we have is your friend in that mountain, if I didn’t care Klark kom Skaikru then your friend would surely be dead and we would be at a loss yet again. This is the first time in my peoples history that we have any chance of destroying the mountain because of the inside man. It wasn’t an easy decision for me to make but that’s why I am Commander because I make the choices that no one else will! It may not make sense to you because you haven’t been here as long as we have but I want my people to live without the fear of the mountain. I have lost...” Lexa shook her head. “We have lost so much to them and I’ll do what ever it takes and I know my people will come back even stronger from this.”

Clarke squeezed lexas hand, not realised that the blonde was still holding it. “What have you lost Lexa?”

Lexa turned to her with watery eyes. “Everything.” She said softly. “Everyone.” She sighed.

She tensed when she felt softly fingers move her braid behind her ear and then down her cheek following the pattern of her war paint gently. “I’m sorry.” The blonde said quietly.

Lexa looked at the blonde. “Me to. I’m sorry we are both put in the position where we have to make these awful decisions but if I wasn’t the leader of my people and you weren’t the leader of yours, we would both be warriors following someone else’s orders and I don’t know about you Klark kom Skaikru But I would fight until my last breath for peace.”

Clarke smiled at her and shuffled closer. “You’re right.” She sighed. “Your not heartless Leksa kom trikru And I don’t think your a monster by the way. I’m sorry I said that I’m just angry and upset.”

“Do you usually lash out at people when your angry and upset.”

“Yeah.”

“You should spar instead. Would you like too.”

Clarke raised an eyebrow. “With you.”

“Sha.”

Clarke smirked. “No I don’t feel like getting my ass kicked today thanks. I’ve seen you spar with your warriors.”

“I wouldn’t be like that with you Clarke.” She said softly.

Clarke smiled. “Can we just sit here a while longer.”

“Yes.”

Present

Lexa smiled sadly at the memory. She threw a rock in the water and froze when she heard a twig snap. She stood up quickly and turned. Octavia was standing near. “You will have to work on your stealth skills once again Octavia kom Skaikru.” She sighed as she sat back down.

Octavia sat beside her. “Yeah I really didn’t get that chance in the bunker.”

“What are you doing here?”

Octavia shrugged. “God I have missed this.” She said closing her eyes letting the sun warm her face. 

“I could imagine.”

Octavia picked up a rock and threw it in the water. “So listen I’m going to stay here for a couple of days.”

“Are you now?”

Octavia stood up and started undressing down to her underwear. “Yup.” She said jumping in the water. Lexa shook her head and laughed. “You coming in?”

Lexa shrugged, undressed and jumped in the water. 

.....................

Lexa was floating on her back with Octavia floating beside her. “Why are you really here?”

Octavia sighed. ”Needed to get away.”

“Hmmm.” 

“Nomon!” 

Lexa looked up to see her daughter. “Heya Nomon, Who is that?” She said pointing to Octavia. 

Lexa smiled. “Her name is Octavia.”

Octavia smirked. “I’m a queen.”

Lexa rolled her eyes then pushed Octavia’s head under the water. Octavia came up coughing. “My apologies Your majesty.”

Lexa and Madi laughed making Octavia laugh as well. She jumped on Lexa’s back trying to get her under. “Get her Nomon!” Somehow Lexa managed to flip Octavia over her back and back in the water. They wrestled for 20 minutes with Madi cheering on the side until Murphy came looking for them. He rolled his eyes when Lexa’s asked him to serve Octavia some food.

As they were getting dressed Octavia sighed. “You didn’t have to do that?”

“Do what?” She asked confused.

“Make me lunch I can go hunt for my own food.”

She smiled. “I have no doubt but Murphy always makes to much anyway. It is really not a problem Octavia.”

She nodded and followed Lexa to the bunker. Lexa watched as Octavia looked around curiously. She caught Lexa’s eye. “Nicer then the hell I was stuck in for six years.”

Lexa nodded and they all sat down to eat. Emori sat down last. “So Who are you?”

“The red queen.”

Jay jay looked at her with wide eyes. “Nomon aren’t queens suppose to wear crowns and be old?”

Murphy smiled at his son. “Son this is Octavia she is skaikru.”

“Like you nontu?”

Before he could agree Octavia interpreted. “I’m nothing like you Murphy.” She sneered making everyone at the table freeze. 

Emori placed her fork down on the table. “John is good at many things. Hunting cooking to name a few, he is a good husband an exceptional father and a loyal brother. You would be so lucky to be compared to him.”

Octavia looked down at her plate embarrassed. Lexa stood grabbing Octavia by the elbow and pulling her up. “Take your food and go wait outside for me.”

She nodded and left. Lexa looked at John. “sorry Brother.”

“It’s ok Lexa, she knows the John Murphy from six years ago.”

“Still. It was uncalled for. I’m going to go talk to her.”

.........................

When Lexa found Octavia she was sitting but the water. “Do you usually have people serve you food then disrespect them?”

Octavia discreetly wiped a tear from her face. “No.” She said softly.

Lexa sighed and sat down next to her. “You will apologise.” She said leaving no room for argument.

Octavia nodded. “Sha.”

Lexa bumped her shoulder. “Are you well.” Octavia shook her head and cried. Lexa moved closer and put her arm around her shoulders. Octavia lent in to her body. “I hate who I have become.” She said through her tears.

“Then change it.”

“I have so much blood on my hands Lexa I don’t know if that’s possible.”

Lexa nodded understanding the burden of being commander. “Everything that you have done did you do it for yourself or the people?”

“The people.”

“Then I think you will be ok Octavia. I know it is hard but you did what you had too it’s not too late to become who you want to. Polis is at peace, you can be as well knowing that what you have done has contributed to that peace.”

Octavia nodded. “Can I stay here tonight?”

“Once you apologise to john, then yes.”

Octavia grunted. “Better get it over with then.”

They both stood up and made there way back to the bunker. When they entered John, Emori and the kids stopped eating to look at her. She rolled her eyes. “Sorry Murphy, old grudges die hard ya know?”

He nodded. “Yeah I get it. Did you like your dinner?”

She looked at Lexa confused. “Um yeah.”

“I made that shit.”

She chuckled. “Yeah it was good.”

“Good or grand your majesty?”

She smirked. “It was good Murphy.”

“Did everyone hear that, the queen likes my cooking. That’s royalty baby!”

Everyone laughed including Octavia. “One piece of advice.” Lexa said from beside her.

“What?”

“Stop with this queen stuff your just setting yourself up for a lot of teasing.”

She smiled. “Yeah I can see that.”

“Now.” Murphy said standing up. “Can you find your way to the table or do you need a red carpet?”

The children all giggled. “You see?” Lexa laughed. 

.....................

Lexa and Octavia were sitting up in a tree watching the moon reflect on the river. “So?” Octavia said from beside Lexa. “What’s up with you and the princess?”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” She sighed. 

“You should hear what she has to say.”

“Octavia...”

“Niylah is a good person.” She snapped her head towards the other woman. She held up her hands in mock surrender. “She’s a friend.”

“Friend?”

She clenched her jaw. “Maybe we could be more.”

“What’s stopping you?”

“I think she could make me happy. That’s what’s stopping me.”

“And that’s a bad thing?”

“I’ve been happy before Lexa. I know what it’s like to lose that and I don’t want to go through it again. Plus she slept with Clarke.” She said scrunching up her face.

Lexa laughed. “You love her.”

“Nope,”

“Yes you do.”

“Nope.”

“Awww.” Lexa pouted. “The queen has found love.” 

Octavia smiled and punched her in the arm. “Shut up Heda.”

They both laughed. “You shouldn’t be afraid of getting hurt Octavia, I felt the same after Costia was killed but then I meant Clarke and even though we are not together now and she doesn’t love me like I thought I’m glad I opened up to her. I don’t regret that.” She said softly. “It’s made me a better person.”

“No offence but your stupid.”

“I’ll never understand why Skaikru say something insulting but start the insult but saying no offence when clearly its offensive. Your so annoying.”

Octavia laughed and threw her arm around Lexa’s shoulder bringing her close and kissing her on the cheek over and over. Lexa laughed trying to get away. “You love me.”

Lexa rolled her eyes and wiped her cheek. “No offence but that’s disgusting.” Lexa smiled.

They both laughed 

................

Both Octavia and Lexa were standing by the door of the bunker. It was morning and time for Octavia to go back to Polis. “What will you do when you return?”

“Find Niylah.” She shrugged.

“Nawww.” Lexa said pinching Octavia’s cheek. 

Octavia playfully hit her hand away. She smiled at Lexa. “I’m glad I came here. I like you Lexa but look as your new friend I have to tell you that your making a mistake.”

“Don’t-“

“You are...I’m not one to pry or get involved with shit like this and I’m not gonna tell you to go running back to Polis. Back to Clarke but if you see her again, you should listen to her. Someone told me that listening is a great form of respect.”

Lexa frowned. She used to say that all the time, she still does. “Who told you that?”

“Clarke. When she was telling me a story about you. When she was gushing about you.”

Lexa nodded. “Ok.”

“Good.” Octavia smiled. She pulled Lexa in for a hug. “Thank you Lexa.” She said softly.

“Nothing to thank me for.”

“Ah ha.” She pulled back. “When we meet next I want to spar.”

“Ok.” 

Octavia walked off. “See ya Lex!”

...........................

Clarke was waiting anxiously by the treeline. Bellamy had told her that Octavia would be returning today and Clarke wanted to know how Lexa was doing. When she seen Octavia she stopped pacing. “O!”

Octavia nodded. “Hey princess.”

“You look different?”

“I do?”

“Yes.” Clarke noticed that she looked a bit happier. “How is she?”

“I told you I wasn’t going to get involved.”

“I know.” She sighed. “Please just tell me how she is?”

“She’s sad but she’s ok.”

Clarke nodded and stood up straight. “You were right the other day. I’m going to get good. I’m going to fix Polis and win her back.”

“I take it you ended things with my brother.”

“Yes. It was mutual.”

“Good, I’m glad Clarke.”

She smiled. “I’m going to start with the prisoners, can you help.”

“Of course.” She said walking by her. 

Clarke held her by the elbow. She looked sadly at Octavia. “Did you get to meet Lexa’s daughter?”

Octavia sensed the sadness in her tone. She held her hand over the blondes. “Yes. She’s awesome Clarke, you will love her, jay jay is cute as well and Murphy is different but good different and his wife Emori is way to good for him. You will love them all.”

“I hate that you got to meet them first.”

“Yeah well.” Octavia shrugged. “I hate that you slept with my girlfriend first but what can you do?”

“Girlfriend? Who? Niylah?”

“Yeah.” She shrugged. “Well I’m hoping anyway.”

Clarke smiled at her. “I’m happy for you.”

“Thanks.” She smiled. “Come on let’s get this shit out of the way.” She sighed as the blonde started walking next to her. “We need a bigger group of friends.”

“Why’s that?” 

“You slept with Finn who slept with Raven who slept with Bellamy my brother who slept with you who slept with my girlfriend Niylah.”

Clarke scoffed. “Yeah that’s kinda gross.”

Octavia laughed. “Come on princess let’s go.”


	11. Chapter 11

It had been a month since Lexa left Polis. Bellamy and Raven were standing near the training grounds watching as Clarke took on two men and one woman. 

Raven scoffed. Her and Bellamy where watching from sidelines. “They have no idea what they are in for.”

Bellamy shook his head and looked on with worry. “I don’t know Reyes. She’s tired.”

“And heartbroken.” She pointed out.

“Yeah I don’t think she’s going to win this one.”

Raven smiled. “Oh the princess will win Bell.”

The woman who had a sword jumped at Clarke, she side stepped her then   
hit her in the back of the head with the end of her sword knocking the woman out. One of the men swung his sword around near her legs. She jumped it and hit him on his back then kicked him in the ribs. The second man tired to get her in the back while her back was turned but Clarke blocked his attack and kicked him in the stomach sending him to his knees. She walked up to him slowly while he looked up to her then she sent her knee smashing into his face breaking his nose and knocking him out. She looked around the training pits. “Anyone else?!” She dared.

Raven rolled her eyes. “Only an idiot would agree to fight her in this state.”

Bellamy looked on impressed. “We have to do something.”

“Do you have a Lexa clone Bell?”

“I’m serious Raven, she has barely slept. We basically have to force feed her and all she does is work and fight.”

“She will be fine.” They heard behind them.

Both Bellamy and Raven jumped as Octavia crept up on them.

“Jesus fuck O!” Raven dramatically held a hand to her heart.

“Yeah don’t do that!” Bellamy agreed.

Octavia smiled. “Don’t look now but here comes the princess and she looks pissed.”

They both turned to watch Clarke storming towards them. “Oh shit.” Raven watched wide eyes.

Clarke stopped in front of them. “Have you all been following me?!”

Octavia scoffed. “I haven’t, I have better things to do.”

“Float you!” Clarke stepped towards her. 

Bellamy held his hand against her chest to stop her. Clarke hit it away. “Calm down Clarke.”

She scoffed. “I’m so sick of you Blakes and your shit!”

“What did I do?” Octavia pushed Bellamy out of the way so she could stand in front of Clarke so they were both standing toe to toe. 

“You went and seen her!” She snapped.

Octavia laughed. “Oh I see. So this is about Lexa?”

“Don’t say her name!” Clarke pushed her.

Octavia pushed her back. “You made the decision to hang around here and fix the place up Clarke!” She pushed her again. “You let her leave.” She pushed her again. “Your choosing to stay! So get the fuck over it!”

Clarke screamed and tackled Octavia to the ground. Raven held Clarke around the waist pulling her back while Bellamy was doing the same to Octavia. When they were pulled apart Bellamy stood between them and turned to Clarke. “That’s Enough Clarke!” 

Raven pulled her back and stepped around her to stand in her face. “Stop. Clarke.” She gently placed her hand on Clarke’s shoulder. “Just stop. You’re angry and frustrated because it’s taking longer then you thought. We are your friends you don’t get to treat us like this.”

“You follow me everywhere.” She snapped.

“Yup we sure do! The other day you passed out in your bedroom from exhaustion. We have to make sure you eat which is hard mind you because all you do is work and when your not working you’re here fighting like an idiot. So hell yeah we follow you around.”

Octavia huffed. “Again I just want to point out that I do NOT follow you around.”

“No.” Clarke swallowed the lump in her throat. “You just go on and on about how much you admire Lexa.”

“So? She’s awesome I can’t wait to see her again.”

Clarke tried to shove Raven out of the way to get to Octavia. 

Bellamy rolled his eyes. “Really O.” She sighed. 

Octavia shrugged. “You know what let her come at me. Least if she’s fights me she can actually say she’s fighting for something.”

“Fuck you!” Clarke yelled as she walked away in a huff.

Raven turned to Octavia. “Why?.”

“What? She gets to treat us all like shit and we have to take it?”

“She’s sad and we put up with a lot worst from you!”

“Whatever.” She shook her head.

“No Raven is right Octavia.” Bellamy said softly. “She’s overworked. Exhausted and probably dehydrated and she’s in pain. She never gave up on you. She never stopped looking out for you even when you were being horrible to her. Right now your being a really shitty friend.” He shook his head in disappointment. “Come on Raven.” She said pulling her way. “Let’s go make sure she eats lunch at least.”

..............................

Octavia knocked on Clarke’s door but there was no answer. After talking to Bellamy and Raven she realised that they were right. She was being a shitty friend. She remembered trying to push everyone away once the bunker doors were opened. A lot of people got the hint but Clarke she refused to give up. She would see her everyday, try to get her to talk and eat. She knocked again after no answer she shrugged and walked in anyway. She found Clarke pacing back and forward.

“What do you want Octavia?” 

Octavia sighed and closed the door. “I’m sorry.” Clarke shook her head and kept pacing. Her first were clenched so hard that her knuckles where white. “Talk to me Clarke. Yell at me if you have to but what your doing. It’s not healthy.”

“I’m just so angry!” She said still pacing. “I’m so fucking angry Octavia!”

Octavia sat down on the bed. “Why?”

Clarke huffed. “It’s taking too long. I work and I work and it’s taking to fucking long! It’s been a month! One month! And the clinic is only three quarters done. The school hasn’t even been started and the Polis tower still looks like shit!”

“It will take time.”

“I want it done now!” She there her knife across the room.

Octavia looked at the blade now embedded in the wall then back to Clarke. “Feel better?”

Clarke took a deep breath and sat by Octavia. “No.”

“Clarke just go see her.”

“No. I can’t go there with nothing to offer them.”

“Clarke.” Octavia said softly. “She doesn’t care about any of this. She doesn’t care about what you have to offer.”

“I am NOTHING compared to her.”

“I know.” She smirked.

Clarke chuckled. “Thanks O.”

Octavia bumped her shoulder. “I’m sorry about the stuff I said and I don’t speak about Lexa to hurt you Clarke.”

“I know.”

“Look.” Octavia turned towards her. “You can’t go on like this. You want this place up and running? Then you have to rest. You have to eat and drink and you have to stop treating the people who love you like their your enemy. What’s that saying about Paris?”

Clarke sighed. “It wasn’t built in a day.”

“When I first stepped outside the bunker doors and first seen Polis I thought fuck how is this place ever going to be the same again. Then I seen you and I knew that you would fix it all Clarke. I knew you would help me lead these people and fix Polis. No one else could do that you know. So yes It is taking a while to fix but it WILL be fixed.”

“I know.” She smiled sadly. “I just miss her.”

“Me too.” Clarke glared at her. “What she’s so badass.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “I’m starting to think that the Blake siblings have a crush on her.”

Octavia laughed. “Nah I um.” She rubbed the back of her neck. “I lo-“ she rolled her eyes and cleared her throat. “Iloveniylah.” She said quickly.

Clarke grinned. “I’m sorry your going to have to repeat that.”

She huffed. “I love Niylah.”

Clarke smiled. “That’s great o!”

She rolled her eyes. “Shut up and let’s never speak of this again.”

Clarke laughed. “Sure. She’s doing great things with mom and helping the clinic get up and running.”

“I know. She was good at organising shit in the bunker too.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah And she kept me sane ya know? Is that how you felt when you slept with her?”

Clarke shook her head. “No. She was a friend offering comfort in a time i needed it.”

Octavia nodded. “Lexa will see She is a good person Clarke you just have to talk to her.”

“She’s stubborn, I can talk all I want getting her to listen is another issue.”

Octavia smirked. “Well lucky for you you’re good at making people listen.” Octavia bumped her shoulder. “So can you start living like a normal person now?”

“I will try my hardest.”

“Good.” She stood up. “And stop injuring my warriors.”

Clarke smirked. “They asked for it.”

“Sure princess.”

...............

It had been a month and Murphy has had enough of Lexa moping around. He held the radio to his mouth. “Hey is anyone from Polis there?”

After a few minutes the radio crackled. “Yeah who’s askin?”

“It’s me Murphy?”

“I heard you were alive.” 

Murphy smirked knowing who it was. “Yeah.” He chuckled. “Sorry to disappoint you Raven.”

“Ahhh what can ya do? So what you want Murphy?”

“I want Lexa to talk to Clarke. I’m sick of her being all-“

“Moping and broody?”

“Yup!” 

“I feel the same about the princess. I’m going to give the radio to Clarke and tell her it’s an Ambassador you give yours to Lexa and say it’s Octavia.”

“Great.”

“Bye asshole.”

...........................

Lexa sat on the bed and held the radio to her chest she thought it would be nice to talk to Octavia and also if she can get some information on how Clarke is going without being to obvious. it’s been a month. “Octavia?”

“Leksa?” Lexa froze she knew that voice anywhere. “Leksa are you ok? What’s wrong?”

Lexa sat shocked. She didn’t expect this. “Hi.” She said softly. Not knowing what else to say to the blonde. She looked over her shoulder and seen Murphy smirking and rolled her eyes.

“Hi.” The blonde said back. “Are you ok Lexa?”

“Fine.”

“Did you need Octavia for something?”

“No.” She replied softly.

“Oh. Um. It’s good to hear your voice.”

“Yours too.”

_“Ai meme we Leksa.”_ (I miss you Lexa)

Lexa shook her head. _“Nou Klark”_ (Don’t Clarke)

_“Ait.”_ (Right) She heard the blonde sigh. _“Moba.”_ (Sorry)

“You still apologise a lot.”

“Guess I still have a lot to apologise for.”

“I have to go.”

_“No Leksa hod op!”_ (No lexa wait!)

“Sha?”

“Please just. Don’t go yet. Tell me something, anything at all. What did you do today. How is Madi? What did you have for lunch? Anything....please. I miss you.”

Lexa held the radio to her chest and squeezed her eyes shut. “I miss you too.”

“Ok. Ok that’s, that’s good....so you miss me and I miss you”

“I suppose.”

“Good. That’s good. So tell me something. Anything.”

Lexa frowned trying to think of something. “I baked some bread today.”

“Really! You bake?”

“Sha.” She smiled.

“Wow. The commander of blood. A baker. Who would have thought it.”

Lexa smiled. “What about you Clarke?”

“I don’t bake.”

“I know I mean tell me something.”

“Oh ok. Um. There’s so much.”

“Really?”

“Yeah the clinic is three quarters done.”

“That’s good. Who is in charge?.”

“Oh um mom.”

“Just your mother?”

“Ah no just a couple of other people.”

“Who?” 

“Mom and Ah niylah.”

“Oh.” Lexa sighed.

“She’s very good at-“

“I have to go bye Clarke.” Lexa said turning off the radio. She slumped back on the bed. It still hurt to talk about.

“Could have given her a chance to finish Lex?” Murphy said from her door. 

Lexa for up and knocked his shoulder on the way out.

....................

“Leksa?” Clarke said in the radio. “Fuck!”

“Well that was stupid.” 

She turned to find Raven leaning against the door frame. “Fuck.” She said Again.

“And you were getting somewhere too.”

“Yes, thank you Raven.” 

“Dumbass.” She said walking away.

“Fuck.” She said Again.

She heard the radio crackle “Leksa?” She said hoping the the brunette was still there.

“Nope.” She heard back.

She rolled her eyes at the voice. “Murphy....”

“You know princess? Maybe.... JUST maybe next time...I mean that is if there is a next time. A big IF. Maybe refrain from talking about the person you slept with almost straight after you thought Lexa was dead. Huh? Sound like a plan princess?”

She shook her head. “Float you.” She said in the radio.

“Right back at ya asshole.”

She threw the radio on the bed and lied down on it. “Fuck.” She said Again. “I can’t do anything right.” She sighed.

........................

Lexa sat by the lake watching as Madi fished. She felt someone sit next to her. “This is annoying the shit out of me.” Murphy snapped.

“Not now Murphy.”

“You could have heard her out Lexa!”

“I’m sorry I don’t want to hear about the going’s on of my ex lovers ex lover.”

He rolled his eyes and laid back on the ground beside her and rubbed his face with both his hands. “Lexa this is stupid!”

“And you’re a liar!”

He sat back up “I didn’t lie about shit!”

“Well then you tricked me!” She pushed his shoulder.

“Yeah well I’m sick of looking at your sad face!”

Lexa groaned and got him in head lock. He pushed her back so he could try to get out but was unsuccessful. “You are being unreasonable! That’s saying a lot comin from me sister!” She huffed and let him go. “Look.” He said softly. “I’m not saying you should forget what’s she’s done or forgive her all I’m saying is hear her out! Damn it Lexa what she did was six god damn years ago and she thought you were dead.” She looked away. He shook his head and got closer to her. “You once told me you would give anything for her to be alive. Well she’s alive sis, she’s two hours drive away and you sit here hurting because of something she did six years ago when the world was a different place. If you were to be like this with everyone you would have nothing to do with me and Emori.” 

She turned quickly towards him. “No.” She shook her head.

“Yes. We were bad, we both did some pretty fucked up shit. Imagine a life with out us in it.”

“I would never!”

He smiled at her. “Me either.” She held his hand. “Your my family Lexa and I hate seeing you in pain. This is causing you pain and it won’t stop until you face her. All I’m saying is listen. That’s all.”

“What if I don’t like what she has to say brother.”

“Then you can move on.”

“I’m not ready to hear what she has to say”

“Ok.” He sighed. “Then at least let the princess know that you need time.”

She sighed and nodded. 

....................

Lexa was in her room alone staring at the radio. She has wished ever day since she awoke in the bunker that Clarke was alive and here she is keeping her distance from the blonde. She cracked her neck and her knuckles a nervous habit she picked up as a child and looked at the radio again. She shook her head and started pacing. 

“Something wrong?” 

She looked to her door where Emori was standing. “I have lead armies to war. I created a coalition creating peace, I have fought men and woman 10 times my size and yet.” She took a deep breath. “Talking to Clarke makes my stomach full with butterflies. Like some love sick fool.”

Emori laughed. “Oh Lex you ARE a love sick fool.”

“Shof op.” The brunette grinned. 

“Just get it over with Heda.”

“I’m not ready to listen to her reasoning.”

“Then don’t.” She shrugged. Emori left and closed the door. 

She held the radio in her hand and sat on her bed. “Klark?”

She waited a minute. “Commander hottie.”

She frowned. “Commander hottie? Raven?”

“That’s me!”

“Oh.”

“Yeah Commander hottie is my nick name for you.”

Lexa rolled her eyes. “Is that so? You know Raven I have a nick name for you too?”

“Do tell.”

“Annoying Skai tinker.”

Raven laughed through the radio. “I like you Commander hottie.”

“Is Clarke there?”

“Yeah hold on this is gonna be fun.”

“What? Raven please just put Clarke on the radio.”

“Can’t hear you Commander but you will be able to hear us...“

Lexa shook her in confusion. She could hear rustling and could hear raven snickering. “Raven what the hell have I told you about coming into my room!” She heard Clarke say.

“Klark?” She said in the radio with no response.

“Don’t know.” Raven said. “I wasn’t listening.”

She could hear Clarke groan. “Your annoying Raven!”

“Hey that’s what Commander hottie said about me.”

“Her name is Lexa.”

“So you don’t think she is hot?” Lexa smiled realising what Raven was up too. She laughed.

“What? Raven I’m not getting into this with you. Get out!”

“So you really don’t think the former commander is a hottie.”

She hear Clarke sigh. “Of course Raven she’s gorgeous.” Lexa blushed at the admission.

“Oh yeah? what’s so gorgeous about her, personally I think she has a nice ass.”

“Hey! Don’t talk about her like that!”

“Like what?”

“Like she’s a piece of meat.”

“Come on Clarkey just tell me what you think is the most attractive feature on the former commander?”

“If I do will you go away?.”

“Sure.”

“Ok. Her eyes.”

“Her eyes?”

“Yes her forest green emerald eyes. Now get out.”

“Oh my god.” Raven bent over clutching her stomach in laughter. “You are disgusting!”

“Reyes!out!”

“Ok.” She chuckled “here?”

“What do I need the radio for Raven!”

“Commander hottie is waiting to talk to you.”

“What!” She heard the blonde hiss.

“Yeah she heard the whole thing!” Raven laughed 

Lexa heard a scuffle. “Give it to me!”

“Oh is that what you say to Commander hottie.” She laughed. 

Lexa chuckled. She heard a door slam. “Leksa?”

“Hello Klark.”

“I’m so sorry about that.”

Lexa smirked. “It’s ok.”

“Well no it’s a bit embarrassing.”

Lexa smiled. “Why you told me once that I had dreamy eyes.”

“What!”

“Yes it was just before the mountain you had too much of Monty’s moonshine and drunkly confessed.”

“Oh god.” She sighed. “What did I say.”

“I remember it like it was yesterday.”

**flashback**

_Lexa was in her tent lying in bed when she heard her warriors arguing with someone. She thought it was strange as no one came to her tent this late at night. “Heda? Fiya..Klark kom Skaikru hir” (Heda apologies...Clarke of the sky people is here)_

_Lexa rolled her eyes. “Teik em min op.” (Let her enter.)_

_Clarke stumbled through the tent flaps and scoffed at her guards. “Told ya sheed wanna see me.”_

_“Klark are you drunk?”_

_”pffft.” She waved her hand around. “No!”_

_”You’re drunk.”_

_”shhhh don’t tell my mother.” She laughed._

_Lexa took a good look at the blonde. Her hair was disheveled and her jacket was out of sort. Lexa approached the blonde. “Clarke are you ok? What happened.?”_

_Clarke waved her away and made her way to Lexa’s bed. “Nothin.”_

_Lexa sat down beside her. “Did someone harm you? I’ll have them killed!”_

_Clarke laughed. “You’re sweet.” Lexa blushed. “I mean in a scary cute” She held up her hands like claws. “Rarrrr kinda way.”_

_Lexa shook her head. “Klark what happened?”_

_”My mother won’t look at me Lexa” she threw her hand in the air. “My mother! The father killer! Won’t look a ME!”_

_”Father killer?”_

_”Yup! She was part of the reason why my father was executed! And SHE can’t look at ME!”_

_”Moba Klark. That is truely terrible.” Lexa said softly._

_Clarke lent forward and got really close to Lexa’s face. “Can I tell you a secret?”_

_”Sha.” Clarke looked Lexa in her eyes and glanced at her lips. “What is it?.” She said softly._

_”I forgot. Fuck. Your eyes are so green Lexa. So dreamy.”_

_Lexa blushed. “Ah Mochof”_

_”I’d get lost in them. I mean I kinda just did I wanted to tell you something and the words were literally taken from my mouth.” Clarke giggled. “You took the words right out of my mouth Commander.”_

_Lexa smiled and pushed the blonde so she was lying down. “Go to sleep Klark.”_

_”So dreamy..” she yawned._

**Present**

“Ok.” Clarke said through the radio. “That’s probably the most embarrassing thing I have ever done.”

Lexa laughed. “It’s fine Clarke.” Lexa shook her head to get her mind at the task at hand. “Hei”

“Heya” 

“Klark I need to apologise for my behaviour earlier.”

“No. You don’t.”

“I do.” She sighed. “I have only ever been with two people before you and Costia. After she was killed it was hard for me to open up to anyone. I didn’t even try for me it was better to be alone. So me kissing you for the first time was so out of character for me.”

“Leksa-“

“No let me finish Beja.”

“Ok.”

“You rejected me the first time but I had hope that one day you would be ready. Hope is dangerous Clarke cause if you hope then you set yourself up for disappointment, well that’s what Titus always told me anyway. So then I left you at the mountain and I thought I would never have that chance again but I cared about you and when I found out Queen Nia wanted to harm you I had to find you first to keep you safe because you see Clarke I hoped and hope is hard to let go of.” She sighed. “So when we were together intimately it wasn’t some last minute decision I made, it was something I was hoping for for three months and I felt happy and at peace for the first time in a long time. It meant something to me. You moving on from me weeks after that.” She swallowed. “It hurts Clarke.” Lexa wiped the tear that fell.

“Leksa it meant something to me as well.”

“What? What did it mean to you?”

“Everything damn it!” She heard the blonde sob. “Leksa I have done a lot of shitty things but I’d never hurt you on purpose.”

“I know.” Lexa said softly. “Do you respect me Clarke?”

“More then you will ever know.”

“Then I need time.”

“What?”

“I need time and you need to give it to me so that one day we could be friends.”

“Friends? Leksa-“

“I Promise one day I’ll listen to your reasoning but not now.”

“Leksa Beja?-“

“Please Klark.”

“Leksa I-it’s hard to stay...away...I miss you.”

“Beja Klark?”

“Damn it!” She heard something break. Then she heard Clarke breathing heavily trying to catch her breath. “I do respect you and I will honour your request but know this Leksa....I miss you and I WANT to see you.”

“Thank you Clarke.”

“Bye Lexa.”

“Bye Clarke.”

.......................

Clarke held the radio had in her hand and went to through it but felt a hand stop her. “Whoa Whoa Whoa.” Raven said taking it off her. “These take me time to make ya know.”

“You heard.”

“Of course.” Raven scoffed. “I have no boundaries princess you know this.” Raven sighed. “I’m sorry. But why didn’t you tell her you and Bellamy aren’t together ”

Clarke shrugged. “She wants time and honestly I need time. I don’t have anything to offer her.”

“God not this again Clarke!”

She huffed. “What don’t you Bellamy and Octavia not understand. She is EVERYTHING and I am NOTHING! She has a child Raven! A child! I can’t have her come here when the place is not complete! I can’t have her coming here when I am a god damn mess!”

“Clarke-“

“NO!” She took a deep breath. “No Raven if she is going to come to Polis it will be because she wants to come to Polis because Polis is the place people want to be you know? I don’t want her moving just for me. I need to be better don’t you understand.”

Raven hugged the blonde. “Princess. You are so good you do so much good. If you ask me I think your to good for her.”

The blonde laughed. “Your just saying that cause I’m your best friend.”

“No I mean it.”

“Well your the only one. I think the Blake’s have a crush on Lexa.”

Raven cackled. “Oh my god your serious!”

“They both go on and on about her.”

“Well so do you princess.”

“Yeah.” The blonde looked away. “Because I love her.”

She hugged the blonde again. “Ok. Let’s get this shit storm up and running then. Me and Bell and who ever the hell I want are gonna work day and night to get this place spick and span!”

“Thanks Raven.”

“Well I’d be a crap best friend if I didn’t help you get laid now would I.”

“What-“

Raven clapped her hands. “Ok operation get the princess laid is a go.”

“Please don’t call.-“

Raven held the radio up to her mouth. “Bellamy!”

“Yup!”

“Operation get the princess laid has commenced, get the team together!”

“Yes ma’am.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Raven?”

Raven walked out the door. “Meet us in the coalition chambers in 30 mins princess.”

“Great.” Clarke mumbled.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 10

It had been three months. Three months since Clarke watched Lexa drive away. Three months she has put all her energy and time into rebuilding Polis. Three months since she and Bellamy ended on mutual terms. She slumped back in her chair opened her drawer and pulled out the photo of Lexa and Madi. Three months she thought as she stared at the photo. Lexa never contacted her back through radio. She always made sure that she has the radio close to her. Her fingers twitched wanting to contact the brunette everyday but she couldn’t. She told Lexa she would give her time.

The last three months she has built the school and the medical centre. The Polis tower is completed and full of important officials. There are houses all round Polis. She even executed the three men Lexa pointed out. She caught them planning on doing dreadful things to woman in the camp. Charmaine didn’t try and argue when she tied them up and held a gun to each of there heads and she didn’t feel an ounce of guilt. But still, she went to bed every night crying. Cause none of the achievements felt like achievements because Lexa wasn’t there. 

There was a knock on the door that bought Clarke out of her thoughts. “Come in.”

Bellamy walked in with a smile on his face. Things have been great between them, Bellamy has been busy overseeing the construction of the school but every day he would check in on her to see how she was holding up without Lexa. Some nights she cried, other nights she lashed out at him but most days they just talked like they used too. “Princess?”

“Hey Bell.”

“It’s time.” She frowned at him trying to figure out what he means.

Raven walked in behind him and held up a bag and a radio. 

“What’s going on?” The blonde asked confused.

“Polis is good princess.”

Raven nodded. “Yup, school is Built, medical centre is Built, tower finished and prisoners executed.”

Bellamy smirked. “And you are ok as well.”

“Well.” Raven said holding up one finger. “Except the brooding, that’s kinda annoying.”

Bellamy elbowed her. “Reyes!.”

“Ow! What!?”

Clarke stood up and walked around the desk. “What’s going on?” She asked again.

“It’s time to go princess.” Bellamy said.

“Yup.” Raven agreed. “Time to go see Lexa and make things right.”

“But. I can’t just leave.”

Octavia walked in. “You can And you will. I’m sick of looking at your sad face.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Thanks O.”

She shrugged. “Don’t act like you don’t want to go.”

“I’m not! I do want to go!”

“Then what’s stopping you?”

Clarke sighed. “She asked for time. What if I go and she doesn’t want to see me.”

Bellamy held her shoulder. “You have given her plenty of time princess. At least if you go and she doesn’t want anything to do with you, Then you will know. Then you can move on. You will have closure.”

...............

Clarke stood near the tree line with Bellamy and Raven. 

Raven gave her the radio. “You sure you don’t want company?”

“No. This is something I have to do myself.”

Bellamy handed her her back pack. “Do you even know where your going?”

“Yeah Octavia gave me directions. I’ll find them.”

Raven looked at her and was unsure. “What’s the worst case scenario here Clarke?”

“Worst case I come back alone and get a pet or something that I can grow old with.”

Both Bellamy and Raven laughed. “I can so see that.” Raven laughed.

She hugged them both then left. 

......................

Clarke had been walking for a couple of days now, she followed the tire tracks, it was obvious over the last six years that driving to Polis was something that Lexa had done frequently. 

She smiled when she seen the back of the rover. It was parked at a tree line that overlooked a river. She heard something strange and moved cautiously beside the car and looked towards the noise. The sight bought a smile to her face. There was music on that she couldn’t place and Murphy was dancing, well he was attempting to dance with the children, while Emori looked on and laughed. Clarke took note of Emori’s belly she was obviously due sometime soon. Beside her sat Lexa. Emori had her arm wrapped around her shoulders both of them laughing and shaking their heads at Murphy’s antics. 

Clarke squatted so she couldn’t be seen. She wanted to see what Lexa’s family was like. Murphy moved towards Emori and held out his hand but Emori hit it away and shook her head. So he did the same to Lexa who looked at him amused. She shook her head but Murphy grabbed her hand and pulled her up. Lexa stood there with her arms crossed so Murphy just danced around her. Madi ran in front of Lexa and held her hands to try and get Lexa to move but she still wouldn’t budge, The little boy who Clarke was assuming was jay jay did the same but still Lexa didn’t move. Clarke seen Madi say something to Lexa which made her roll her eyes, she huffed and then started moving her hips. Clarke grinned watching. Lexa did this for about a minute then sat back down next to Emori who was laughing uncontrollably. 

Clarke looked at lexa and sighed. She looked happy. Tired but happy. They all did. They all made the best of what they have had in these last six years. Clarke was lost in watching Lexa that she didn’t notice Madi walk away from them and towards the blonde. The girl walked up behind Clarke and tapped her shoulder. Clarke fell to the floor in fright making Madi giggle. _“Ai laike Madi kom trikru. Chon Yu bilaike?”_ (I am Madi of the tree people. Who are you?)

Clarke stood and smiled down at the girl. _“Klark kom Skaikru”_ (Clarke of the sky people) she held out her hand. _“Meika’s slak”_ (nice to meet you)

The little girls eyes widened. “No way!” She squealed. 

She heard feet running towards her direction. She quickly turned to see Lexa and Murphy slow down as they noticed it was her. “Klark?” Lexa looked at her shocked. _“Ha yu na komba raun hir?”_ (What are you doing here.)

Clarke shrugged. She wanted to talk to Lexa but not with an audience. _“Drop of?”_ (Lost?)

Murphy scoffed. “Sure you are princess.”

She rolled her eyes. “Murphy. Always a pleasure.”

Emori had come over to them. “Hi I’m Emori and this.” She pointed to the little boy behind her leg. “Is jay jay.”

“Hi.” She smiled. 

Madi ran to Lexa. _“Nomon em don ge Klark!”_ She whispered yelled. (Mother it is Clarke!”)

Lexa smiled at her daughter. _“sha. Em na sen yu in”_ (yes. She can hear you.)

Madi laughed and ran back to Clarke holding her hand swinging it back and forth. “She is just as beautiful as you said she was Nomon.”

Lexa blushed. “Yes thank you child.” She shook her head. 

Murphy shrugged. “Hey Lex maybe she’s here to arrest you?” He smirked at Clarke. 

Clarke rolled her eyes and Madi laughed. “No she’s not uncle Murphy.” 

“Still.” He waved her over. “Better to be safe then sorry. Go take jay jay by the water.”

The little girl groaned but did as she was asked. 

Clarke glared at him. “You didn’t have to do that I’m not here to hurt anyone.”

“Who knows what your capable of now princess.”

She took a step towards him. “Float you Murphy!”

He stepped towards her. “No. Float you princess! What are you doing here? I’m not letting you hurt any of us!”

Emori placed a hand on his chest. “John she’s here alone. Calm down.”

Lexa sighed. “Murphy it’s fine.”

He groaned in annoyance. “There’s that word again.” He shook his head. “No I want to know why she’s here. I want an explanation?” He turned towards the blonde. 

“I don’t owe you shit John Murphy!”

Lexa held Johns shoulder. “Calm down brother.” She looked at Clarke. “He’s very protective, Maybe you should just answer his question.”

She shuffled on her feet. 

Murphy was getting impatient. “Today princess!”

“I came to talk to Lexa!”

Murphy smirked. “See was that so hard?”

“You such an asshole. How you got a woman to marry you and bare not one but two of your children I’ll never know.”

Emori chuckled. “I’ll let you know when I figure it out.” She shrugged and kissed John on the lips softly. “Come on you got your answer let’s go play with the children.”

He rolled his eyes. “Fine.” He looked at Lexa. “If you need anything.”

“I’ll be ok.”

He sighed and looked over his shoulder to glare at Clarke. “I’ll be watching.”

She watched as they walked away. “Always the charmer.” She tried to make a joke. 

“What are you doing here Clarke?”

She stepped closer to Lexa. “I missed you.” She said softly. “Can we talk?”

“Sure.” She sighed. “Come on we will go back to the bunker.” 

.................

Clarke looked around the bunker. “So this has been your home for 6 years?”

“Yes.”

She noticed the big tv. “You have a television?”

“I don’t really use it. Murphy and Emori do, sometimes they will get me to watch a movie.”

Clarke smiled. “Really? What have you seen.”

“The last one I watched was dirty dancing.”

“Ah.” She smiled. “A classic.”

“It was ok.” Clarke sat on the chair and patted the space beside her. “I’d rather stand.”

Clarke nodded. That hurts, she thought.

The bunker door opened and the children ran in with Murphy and Emori behind them. He shrugged. “Kids were hungry.”

Lexa nodded. “I’ll make them something.”

Clarke stood quickly. “I’ll help!”

Clarke followed her to the kitchen. “You don’t have to Clarke.”

“I want to.”

“There is some meat in the fridge can you please get it?”

“Sure.” Clarke opened the fridge and was surprised at how well stocked it was. “Wow.” She whispered and grabbed the meat on the plate. Lexa was cutting up bread. “Did you make the bread?” Remembering their conversation on the radio.

“Sha. I am more of a baker where John is more the chef.” 

“And Emori?”

Emori lent on the bench. “I’m the eater.”

Clarke smiled. “Me too. I’m no good at cooking. I admire people who are.”

“John and Lexa can make anything taste good.”

Clarke looked at Lexa and smiled watching her cut the bread. “I’m sure.”

Lexa made everyone sandwiches including Clarke. She tried to wave her off but Lexa insisted. Clarke had to hold back her moans at how good the sandwich was. As Clarke ate her sandwich she watched as Lexa and Murphy in the corner quietly arguing.

................

“I don’t trust her Lex.”

“I know.”

“I don’t want her to hurt you again.”

“I know.”

“What is she doing here?”

“I don’t know.”

He sighed. “These last three months have been hard Lexa. Watching you try to mend your broken heart.”

“It’s been hard going through it.”

“I know I just. Look I know you ok. You don’t want to talk to her but she’s here so your going to have to...maybe closure is what you need.”

“Yeah.” She said sadly.

“why don’t you take her for a walk?”

“Sha.”

“Are you Ok?”

Lexa sighed. “I didn’t think I’d see her again.”

John rolled his eyes. “That was never not going to happen Heda.”

...................

Madi sat next to clarke. “Hi!”

“Hi.” She smiled. 

“Sooooo do you love my Nomon?” Clarke choked on a bit of bread she had in her mouth. Emori gave her a glass of water and laughed. 

“Ahh.” She hit her chest. “Um.”

“Clarke?” Lexa said. “Would you like to go for a walk?”

“Sha.” She smiled relived.

......................

Clarke and Lexa walked side by side near the river in comfortable silence. The sun was shining on the lake giving off a beautiful reflection. Lexa was looking at the lake, her face was calm and relaxed. The last rays of sunlight was beaming down on her and it highlighted the brunettes cheekbones and made her green eyes glisten. Her brown curly hair blew lightly in the wind. The blonde itches to run her hands through it. Lexa was wearing a lose red singlet that hung off her shoulder showing off her tattoo on her arm she remembers so vividly running her fingers over gently. She wore tight black leather pants that showed off her toned legs. Clarke always knew that Lexa was beautiful but at the moment Clarke thought there wasn’t enough words to describe the beauty she was seeing. She made a mental note to her self to draw this exact moment once she got back to Polis. Just as she was about to say something a gust of wind blew Lexa’s hair over her shoulder revealing a tattoo that Clarke had never seen before right behind the former commanders ear. She Held her arm out in front of Lexa gently stopping them from walking and ran her fingers gently the spot behind her ear where a tattoo of a shooting star now was and underneath that shooting star was written ‘klark’. Clarke’s eyes watered as she ran her finger over the tattoo. She looked from the tattoo to Lexa who was smiling softly at her.

“I had Emori do it not long after I woke in the bunker. She said it would help.” The brunette sighed looking at the lake. “It didn’t but i don’t regret it.”

Clarke cupped Lexa’s cheek. “It’s beautiful Leksa.” She removed her hand intertwined there fingers together. “It beautiful here as well.”

 

“Yes.” She smiled looking over the lake. “It wasn’t always. The deathwave ruined it but me and Murphy worked hard to restore it.”

Clarke sighed and sat by the water pulling Lexa down with her. “I tried everything to save everyone. She said sadly. 

“I have no doubt Clarke. You saved who you could. That’s all that matters.”

“It was hard to want to save anyone.”

Lexa frowned at her. “Why?”

Clarke picked at the grass. “Because you were killed. Or so I had thought anyway.” Clarke looked at Lexa. “Ontari had murdered all your successors and the city of light was slowly taking over. I had limited time to find Luna who refused the flame and at the same time destroy an artificial intelligence I knew barley anything about. But she did warm me about the deathwave and gave me a choice. Pull a lever and destroy the city of light or not and we could all live happy in this fake world. I chose to destroy the city of light then I had to straight away figure out how to save everyone from something that couldn’t be stopped. ” She sighed. “When I wasn’t thinking about how the world was ending I was thinking about you.” She said softly. “And how I would never see you again, never hold you again.” She wiped a tear from her eyes. “And then people were pressuring me. Wanting me to fix a problem that couldn’t be fixed. Hating me because I couldn’t fix that problem. But Niylah...”

“Clarke-“

“No let me finish.” Clarke held Lexa’s hand a little tighter. She was relived when Lexa didn’t pull away. “Niylah didn’t expect anything from me. When I was with her I could forget about all the shit that was happening around me. Including you being dead.” She squeezed Lexa’s hand. “I didn’t love her. She WAS and IS my friend. It wasn’t lust or love. It was comfort. I needed something, I needed someone cause I was finding it hard to wake up in the morning and try to save everyone.” She reached over and placed a loose lying hair behind Lexa’s ear. And softly running her fingers over the shooting star tattoo again. “I’m Not as strong as you.”

Lexa shook her head. “You’re stronger.” 

“No I’m not.”

Lexa sighed and shuffled over to sit closer to the blonde. “Ok.”

“Ok?”

“Sha. I understand.”

Clarke could still see the hurt in lexas eyes. “But it still upsets you?”

Lexa smiled at her softly. “Yes. I can not help it.”

Clarke nodded sadly. “Ok. That’s ok.” She sighed. “I understand too.” Clarke lied her head on Lexa’s shoulder.

...............

Clarke opened her eyes and tried to place where she was. She looked up and seen Lexa looking down at her. She had fallen asleep with her head in Lexa’s lap. She smiled softly at the brunette and turned to cuddled into her stomach. “Did I fall asleep?”

“Sha Come we will go back to the bunker and have dinner.”

Clarke snuggled into Lexa more making the brunette laugh. “Just a bit longer?”

Lexa weaved her fingers through Clarke’s hair. “Ok.” 

.....................

When they go to the bunker John, Emori and the kids were sitting at the table eating. “Oh look the princess woke up finally.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Yes rebuilding a city really takes it out of you.”

Murphy smirked. “I served you and Lexa some dinner.”

“Is it poisoned?” She drawled.

“Some people just say thank you.”

“Thank you Murphy. Is it poisoned?”

The kids giggled. Madi tugged Clarke down beside her. “Uncle Murphy wouldn’t do that and why does he call you princess?”

Clarke smiled at the girl. “When I first landed it was a name my peers called me.” She shrugged.

“I like it! We have meant a queen and a princess now!”

Lexa sat beside Clarke and started eating. “Thank you for dinner brother.”

“Your welcome.” He smiled. 

“So Emori how far along are you?”

“8 months.” She smiled.

“That’s great. We have a medical facility in Polis now.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I had built a whole section for obstetrics.”

“What’s that?”

“It’s the medical term for pregnancies. There is also a children’s ward.”

Lexa smiled at her. “That’s is good news Clarke. Do you have enough doctors?”

“Yes. Mom had been training people in the bunker and on the ship I was on people were being trained also. There’s also apprentices.”

Emori frowned. “What’s that?”

“Ah like a second.”

“Oh I get it.”

“There’s also a school.”

Jay jay looked up. “A school? What’s that princess.”

Clarke chuckled at the little boy. “It’s a place children go to learn.”

“Learn what?” He asked tilting his head. 

“To read and write and other things.” 

John huffed. “I know what your doing so stop while your ahead.”

Clarke frowned. “And What is it I’m doing?”

Lexa glared at Murphy. “Murphy!” 

He shrugged. “You’re trying to get us all to go to Polis, probably thinking that if we go Lexa will follow, she won’t by the way but we aren’t leaving here without her so you can just save your breath.”

“I wasn’t-“

He scoffed. “You haven’t changed at all.”

“What’s that suppose to mean?”

Emori held Murphy’s hand. “John. That’s enough.”

“She does this Emori when she wants to get her own way. She is a manipulator at best.”

Clarke stood abruptly from the table making everyone jump. “You don’t know anything about me!” She took a deep breath. “But clearly I am not wanted here.” She sighed. “Thanks for dinner and it was nice meeting you all.” She looked at Lexa. “It was good seeing you again.” She smiled sadly and went to the couch to pick up her back pack. She didn’t look back because she felt like a fool for even showing up. She shook her head and promised herself she wouldn’t cry not until at least she was outside.

...................

When the door shut everyone glared at Murphy, even the children. ”What?”

Jay jay scolded him. “Nontu! That was rude!”

“Yeah uncle Murphy!” Madi added. “She’s nice!”

Emori sighed. “It was unnecessary John.”

Lexa sat there and shook her head. “She was just talking about the things that she has achieved brother.” She sighed. “I’ll be back with Clarke and you!” She pointed to Murphy. ”Are going to be nice.”

“I was just being honest.”

Emori smirked. “Nope you were just being an ass.”

Lexa got up quickly and ran outside. Clarke had just passed the rover. “Clarke wait!” Clarke shook her head and kept walking. “Clarke?” Lexa pulled at her elbow but the blonde shrugged her off. She stopped though and took a deep breath. “It’s late. Just stay?”

“No.” She kept walking. 

Lexa jumped in front of her to stop her but Clarke quickly turned away, she didn’t want the brunette to see her crying.

Lexa stood behind her. “I’m sorry about Murphy.”

“Nothing to be sorry about.” She muttered. “Just so you know though I wasn’t trying to manipulate-“

“I know that Clarke. Come back. It’s late anyway.”

“No. I’m fine. I’m sorry I interrupted your day. It was stupid coming here. I just had to see you.”

“Clarke.” Lexa said softly. “I’m glad you came.”

Clarke wiped the tears from her eyes. She looked around it was really dark. “I can sleep in the car.”

“No you will sleep inside.” 

“I’m not going back there Lexa.”

Lexa huffed. “Murphy was out of line Clarke. Come back inside.”

“No!”

“Fine! I’ll go get some blankets and a pillow stay here.”

....................

Lexa slammed the door open. “John Murphy!” She yelled making everyone at the table flinch. “You will go out to that rover and apologise to Clarke so she will sleep inside instead of the car!”

“What? No!”

“Brother! I am not asking!”

“Fine.” He huffed.

..............

Clarke sat against the tree waiting for Lexa. She heard someone coming and stood up and wiped her eyes. “Lexa?”

“Nope. Guess again.”

She groaned. “Where’s Lexa She said she was getting me a blanket and a pillow.” 

“Yeah well she sent me out here to apologise so you would come back inside.”

“I’m not going back in there.”

“Why sick of us already princess.”

“Fuck!” She threw her hands up in the air. “Why do you have to be such an asshole!” 

“I’m the asshole?” He laughed. “That.” he pointed to the bunker. “Is my family, I’ll be an asshole to anyone who hurts anyone of those people. For the first time in my damn life I’m happy and I’m not going to have you destroy that!”

“I’m not trying to damn it! And you have made it perfectly clear that I’m not going to be a part of the family. So float you!”

He grunted and lent against the car. “Your hurt her.” He said softly. “And I blame myself for it. I had a chance to tell you she was alive and I didn’t cause I was thinking about Emori and jay jay. I wasn’t thinking about her but I am now. You! Are with bellamy!”

“No im not!”

He turned to her. “What?”

“I’m not with Bellamy. How could I be?” He looked at her with confusion on his face. “I’m not here to hurt Lexa, Murphy I love her. I never stopped loving her. I settled for Bellamy and he confessed he did the same. We are best friends it was easier to be together then to be alone. I came here to fight for her.”

He scoffed. “Your doing a pretty shitty job at it.”

“I’m never going to be apart of that family!” She pointed to the bunker. 

“Since when have you ever walked away from a fight?”

“I’m tired. I’m so fucking tired.”

Murphy walked up to her. “I’m sorry I was out of line come back and sleep in the bunker.”

“I don’t-“

“Yeah yeah. Look if you don’t Lexa’s gonna kick my ass then carry you in the bunker herself so let’s skip the bullshit shall we.”

“Fine.” She picked up her backpack. “Look don’t tell her I’m not with Bellamy. If she comes back to Polis I want it to be on her terms.”

“Pffft. Whatever you say princess. Now for the really important question?”

“What now?”

“How was my cooking?”

She rolled her eyes. “Your an idiot...”

...................

When Clarke and Murphy arrived she played with her bag strap nervously. Lexa stood up from her chair and walked towards Clarke, she grabbed her bag and put it on the lounge chair then grabbed her hand and dragged her to the table. She sat where she previously was. Madi smiled at her and held her hand. “I saved you some bread.”

“Mochof.” She smiled. 

Jay jay whined “Madi! I wanted to give her MY bread!” He pouted.

Clarke smiled. “How about you both eat your own bread and I’ll just eat this.” She pointed to her bowl.

Lexa smiled and gave Madi her bread back. She took the bread of her own plate and ripped it in half and put it on Clarke’s.”

“Mochof.”

“Well.” Murphy cleared his throat. “Just so you all know Im keeping my own bread.” He smirked

Emori rolled her eyes and swiped the bread for his plate and shoved it in her mouth. The children laughed. He shrugged and kissed her on the cheek. 

................................

Madi had begged Clarke to read her a story, so had jay jay. So at bed time she lied down on Lexa’s bed with either child beside her. “What sort of story do you want to hear?”

“One with magic!” They both said in unison.

She smiled. “Have you ever heard of Harry Potter?”

“No!”

Lexa watched from the doorway smiling. She walked back out so Clarke could tell the kids the story. Murphy had already went to bed and emori was showering. 

When Emori finished showering she sat next to Lexa. “Still telling a story?”

“Yeah. Harry Potter a wizard.”

She chuckled “who comes up with this. I got to hear it.” She got up and made her way to the room and laid beside jay jay.

Lexa smiled. She was happy that Clarke decided to stay.

...................

Lexa was sprawled out on the couch reading. It had been 2 hours since Clarke started her story. Clarke walked out with jay jay in her arms and Emori beside her. “Lex!”

Lexa sat up. “Sha.”

“That was the best story I have ever heard! And there’s more!”

Lexa smiled. “I’m glad.”

Emori took jay jay and looked at the blonde. “I want to hear more.”

“Ok.” Clarke smiled.

“Goodnight.” Emori smiled.

“Night.” She smiled back kindly.

“Night lex!” Emori called over her shoulder. 

“Reshop emori”

Clarke sat beside Lexa. “I’m sorry I took so long but even when the kids were asleep Emori asked me to keep telling the story.”

Lexa smiled. “It’s ok Clarke.”

Clarke smiled back. “I see why you don’t want to leave here.”

“It’s home.”

“Right.” Clarke said sadly. “There’s still a lot to do in Polis but the tower is finished now and like I said so are the school and the medical centre. People are building houses now surrounding Polis. I even executed those three prisoners. I caught them planning on doing some pretty horrific things.”

“I’m glad they are dead.” Clarke nodded and took off her jacket leaving her in her tank top. Lexa frowned when she seen what was hanging from Clarke’s neck. She gently held it. “The flame?”

“Oh yeah.” Clarke blushed. “Um it’s mine now.” She shrugged.

“How so?”

“Titus gave it to me. Luna rejected it and I was forced to give it to Roan so he could keep the peace but when we found out about praimfya and Roan was killed I stole it back from Gai.”

“why do you keep it?. I know it’s not for power that isn’t who you are.”

“No. No one really knows I have it except Raven and Bellamy.”

“Is there a reason why it means so much to you?”

Clarke rubbed the back of her neck. “I had to take it to go into the city of light and destroy Alie and you were there?” Lexa looked at her confused. “The flame keeps there hosts memories and personality and when I needed help in the city of light you came in and saved me. Then you sacrificed yourself so I could get to the switch.” She shrugged. “This is all I had left of you.”

“Oh.” Lexa looked shocked. “Wait how did you take the flame?”

Clarke picked up a blade and cut the tip of her finger. When it bled black Lexa gasped. “Oh.” Clarke smiled at her and yawned. “You’re tired?”

“Yeah. I am actually.”

Lexa got up but Clarke held her hand pulling her back down. “Don’t go yet.”

Lexa nodded and sat back down. The blonde snuggled into her side and closed her eyes. Lexa wrapped her arm around her shoulders and lent back on the chair. When she could hear Clarke’s breathing evening out she gently lied the blonde down and placed a blanket over her.


	13. Chapter 13

Clarke woke from a nightmare. She sat forward and tried catching her breath. The dream was about Lexa and when she was shot. She took a deep breath and walked into Lexa’s and madi’s room, she just had to make sure that Lexa was breathing. She slowly crept in and stood on Lexa’s side and gently held her fingers on Lexa’s pulse. She sighed in relief when she felt the pulse. Just as she was about to pull away Lexa grabbed her hand. “Clarke?”

“Hey. I’m sorry, I had a bad dream and I just had to check.”

Lexa nodded and moved over, she lifted up her blanket inviting Clarke in. She didn’t even think before she got under the covers and move towards the brunette and placed her arm around Lexa’s waist and started playing with her fingers. “Lexa?”

“Sha?”

“Polis is safe now”

“I know.” She said softly. 

“I know it’s not as nice as here but it will be one day.” She swallowed 

Lexa turned to her and cupped her cheek. “It was always the people who made Polis what it was.”

“Yeah.” She smiled. “Come back?” She asked quietly.

Lexa wanted to but she just wouldn’t be able to watch Clarke with Bellamy. Not yet. “I can’t Clarke.” She said sadly. 

Clarke nodded and buried her face into Lexa’s neck. She held her tight and cried. “Ok.” She said through the tears. 

........................

When Clarke woke it was because a finger was jabbing her in the cheek. She opened her eyes and seen Madi hovering above her giggling. It made Clarke smile. She rubbed her eyes and sat up. Lexa was still sleeping so she quietly got out of the bed with Madi following behind her out to the living area. Murphy was in the kitchen with jay jay beside him cooking breakfast. Jay jay waved at her. “Good morning.”

Murphy looked up. “Morning. Breakfast is a while away.”

She nodded looking around not quite sure what to do. “Clarke.” Madi said getting her attention.

“Sha.”

“Let’s go for a walk!”

Clarke did know what to do. Lexa was sleeping and didn’t want to wake her but she wanted to know this little girl her meant so much to Lexa. She looked to Murphy who smirked at her. “It’s ok princess she won’t mind.”

She nodded again and was tugged slightly by Madi who was pulling her out the door.

.......................

Clarke and Madi were by the rover. “Hey Clarke do you know how to climb a tree!?”

Clarke chuckled. “It’s been a while but yes your mother taught me actually.”

“She did!”

“Sha. I fell the first time.”

Madi giggled. “Tell me the story.”

**Flash back. Before Mount Weather. ******

****_Clarke was walking around near camp, she had to get away. To many people wanting answers. She needed to breathe. She lent against a big tree and sighed and smiled looking around the forest, earth is everything her father told her it would be._ ** **

****_“What are you doing out here Klark?”_ ** **

****_Clarke jumped back. She knew the voice of the Commander anywhere. She walked behind the tree to find the brunette but she wasn’t there. “Lexa?” She said as she circled back around._ ** **

****_“Up here.” Clarke frowned and looked up. Lexa was sitting in a tree branch lazily lent back against the trunk with one leg bent up and the other dangling from the branch, she had her blade cutting up an apple. She smirked at the blonde. “Are you lost?”_ ** **

****_“Ah.” She looked around confused. “No. Why are you in the tree? Are YOU lost?”_ ** **

****_Lexa jumped down landing right in front of Clarke. “I am Heda. I know these lands like the back of my hand and they don’t call us trikru for nothing Klark.”_ ** **

****_“Right?” She looked up at the tree. “Fair enough.”_ ** **

****_“You haven’t answered my question?”_ ** **

****_“Am i to answer all your questions...Heda..”_ ** **

****_“Yes.”_ ** **

****_“Well guess what this isn’t offical business so I don’t have to tell you shit.” She huffed and started walking away, she stopped when she felt a hand on her elbow._ ** **

****_“Moba. Hod op.” (Sorry. Wait.)_ ** **

****_“I don’t know what that means.”_ ** **

****_Lexa gently pulled at her elbow asking her turn towards her. “Sorry. Wait.” Clarke nodded. “I did not mean to sound so.” Lexa frowned looking for the word._ ** **

****_“Commaderish” The blonde grinned._ ** **

****_Lexa smiled. “Sha.”_ ** **

****_“I’m sorry too.” She sighed._ ** **

****_“To answer your question Klark. I came out here for some peace and quiet.”_ ** **

****_Clarke smiled and realised that Lexa hadn’t let go of her. “Me too.”_ ** **

****_“I can teach you how to climb?”_ ** **

****_Clarke laughed. She frowned when she realised it was the first time she had laughed in a long time. She smiled at the brunette who was eagerly awaiting her response. “I think I’d fall.”_ ** **

****_Lexa shrugged. “Get knocked down. Get back up again.”_ ** **

****_“Ok.” Lexa stood behind Clarke and was holding her hips directing her where to go. Clarke was trying her hardest not to blush at the contact. She was almost at the same branch Lexa was originally sitting on. She smiled. “Look I did-.” Her hand slipped and she fell to the ground with a thump. “It...” she groaned._ ** **

****_Lexa rushed to her side and knelt by her. “Are you Ok?”_ ** **

****_“Mmm Hmm.” She groaned. “Just Great.” Clarke looked at the brunette who was grinning. Clearly trying to hold back from laughing. “Don’t you dare.”_ ** **

****_“Chit?” Lexa said._ ** **

****_Clarke rolled her eyes but smiled. “Go on then.” Lexa sat by her and laughed. Clarke sat up next to her joining in. “Guess I’m not going to be an honourable trikru any time soon.”_ ** **

****_Lexas laughter died down and she looked at the blonde seriously. “I’d be honoured if you were part of trikru Clarke.”_ ** **

****_Clarke looked at her like she didn’t believe her. “You would?”_ ** **

****_“Of course. You are loyal, fierce and a fine leader.”_ ** **

****_“I don’t feel like it.”_ ** **

****_“Why?”_ ** **

****_Clarke sighed and looked away. “I just seem to keep letting people down. Raven hates me. I sent my best friend into the mountain and he might die. Octavia hates me for sending him there, my mother won’t even look at me.”_ ** **

****_Lexa placed her hand on Clarke’s arm gently. “Klark look at me.” Clarke looked at her sadly. “Not everyone will be happy with the decisions you make but not everyone can make the decisions that you have to that’s what makes you different from them. Unique.”_ ** **

****_Clarke looked down at lexas hand and held it gently. “Maybe I don’t want to be different.”_ ** **

****_Lexa blushed at the contact. She squeezed her hand gently. “You are a born leader. You couldn’t change that even if you wanted to. It’s who you are.”_ ** **

****_Clarke exhaled loudly. “Your right but just in case I’m banished from Skaikru can I be a part of trikru?”_ ** **

****_Lexa smirked. “Sure. If you can climb that tree.”_ ** **

****_Clarke stood up. “I never back down from a challenge Heda.” She teased._ ** **

******Present. ******** **

********Madi was giggling. “Did you get up the tree.”** ** ** **

********“Ah ha.” Clarke grinned. “It took me five times.”** ** ** **

********“Actually.” Lexa appeared from behind the tree. “It took you eleven.”** ** ** **

********Clarke rolled her eyes. “Did not.”** ** ** **

********“Clarke...” Lexa said snickering. “You had to find our healer and ask her for healing balm for your behind.”** ** ** **

********Madi fell back cackling, Clarke blushed. “Shof op Leksa that healer was suppose to keep that to herself.”** ** ** **

********“Well.” Lexa grinned. “The healer thought I would get a good laugh from it.”** ** ** **

********Clarke grinned. “Did you?”** ** ** **

********Lexa laughed. “I did Klark especially the next day when we had a meeting and you refused to sit down.”** ** ** **

********Clarke rolled her eyes. “That was because I wanted to be aware of my surroundings and sitting was not how I was going to do that.”** ** ** **

********Madi giggled. “Or maybe it was because you butt was sore!”** ** ** **

********Clarke grabbed the little girl playfully and started tickling her. “Shof op goufa. I am not the best climber but I am an excellent tickle monster.”** ** ** **

********The little girl laughed. Lexa watched on with a big smile on her face. “Breakfast is ready.”** ** ** **

********Clarke and Madi stood, the girl took Clarke’s hand. “Hey Clarke?”** ** ** **

********“Yeah.”** ** ** **

********“Polis sounds nice.”** ** ** **

********Clarke smiled down to her. “You should have seen it when your Nomon was in charge. It was beautiful. The Main Street had markets lining up and down. People from all lands came to visit to trade or just to be there really.”** ** ** **

********Lexa looked at her and smiled. “Clarke I’m sure Polis will be grand once again with you in charge.”** ** ** **

********“I’m trying.” She sighed. “Still a lot to do. I have been so busy.”** ** ** **

********Madi tugged on her hand. “If we come to Polis Clarke will you make time for us.”** ** ** **

********Clarke stopped and cupped both the girls cheeks. “I will always make time for you and your Nomon, goufa.”** ** ** **

********Madi smiled widely and ran off in front of them. Lexa had watery eyes and tried not to look at the blonde. The blonde noticed and pulled Lexa to a stop. She wrapped her arms around lexas shoulders. “Always Lexa.” She whispered into her ear.** ** ** **

********Lexa nodded and pulled back. She smiled at the blonde. “Come. Let’s have breakfast.”** ** ** **

********...........................** ** ** **

********After breakfast Madi had been glued to Clarke’s side asking all about Polis. She followed her everywhere. Clarke loved it.** ** ** **

********It was midday now and the children suggested a swim in the creek. Clarke was sitting by the creek watching as Lexa played with the children. She felt Emori sit by her. “She’s good with kids huh.” Clarke nodded. “Who would have thought the Commander of blood would be good with kids?”** ** ** **

********Clarke smiled as she watched jay jay jump on her back, the little boy laughing uncontrollably. “I knew she was. I seen it.”** ** ** **

********“The nightbloods?”** ** ** **

********“Yeah.”** ** ** **

********Emori bumped her shoulder. “Your good with kids too. Madi and jay jay have taken a liking to you. Especially Madi.”** ** ** **

********Lexa splashed Madi making the girl squeal. “They are both good kids.”** ** ** **

********“Yeah they are.” Emori looked at Clarke and asked the question she was pretty sure of the answer just by watching Clarke look on at Lexa sadly. “Is she going to go to Polis.” Clarke bought her knees to her chest and rested her chin on her knees. She didn’t look at Emori but Emori could see the blondes eyes well up. She took a shakey breath and shook her head. Emori bumped her shoulder again. The blonde turned her head. “She just needs time. John told me your not with Bellamy anymore. Do you understand that is one of the major reasons why she won’t go back.” Clarke nodded. “So. Tell her your not.”** ** ** **

********Clarke shook her head and watched the kids and Lexa again. Lexa smiled at her and waved. Clarke waved back. “No.” The said softly. “This is Lexa’s home now, I’m not going to be the reason why she leaves this place. If she wants to come to Polis I want it to be because she wants to. Not for me Emori. Look at her.” Emori looked at Lexa laughing at something jay jay did. “She’s so happy. I’m not going to take that away from her.”** ** ** **

********“Even if it means your unhappy.”** ** ** **

********“Yeah.” She smiled. “Yeah even if it means I’m unhappy.”** ** ** **

********Emori sighed. “You’re making a mistake but I’ll respect your decision and I won’t say anything neither will John.”** ** ** **

********“Mochof.”** ** ** **

********“Pro.”** ** ** **

********.........................** ** ** **

********“Aright princess!” Murphy clapped his hands together. They had just finished having dinner and were sitting in the lounge area. “Emori has told me about Harry Potter. I’m ready for part 2.”** ** ** **

********The kids jumped up from there spots excited and ran to Lexa’s bed with Emori and John following. Lexa laughed as they made their way to the bedroom. John and Emori where on the left side with Madi and jay jay next to them. Clarke lied in the middle next to Madi so Lexa laid to her right. It was a tight fit but no one seemed to complain. Clarke continued the story. In the end she looked around, everyone was asleep. Madi was curled into her side and Lexa had sometime during the story lazily draped her arm across the blondes waist. Clarke closed her eyes and smiled. She had to leave to go back to Polis, she would miss them all but Clarke knew she was making the right choice.** ** ** **

********....................** ** ** **

********The next morning Clarke got up before anyone. She packed her bag getting ready for her trip back to Polis. Murphy came out of the room and stretched. It was strange seeing Murphy in an family environment. He was happy, truely happy and he didn’t want anyone to take that away from him and she didn’t blame him. What they all had here was special. As much as she wanted to stay she had duties in Polis to attend too, she felt she had already been gone long enough and Lexa gave her the answer to her question. She didn’t want to be in Polis she wanted to be here and she can’t blame her, they have a life here and they are all happy and Clarke was going to respect that as much as it broke her heart that she would never be a part of it. She sighed as she slung her bag over her shoulder. She promised herself she wouldn’t cry until she got to Polis. When she stood up straight Murphy was leaning against the wall staring at her. “Leaving so soon princess?”** ** ** **

********She shrugged. “Yeah.” She said sadly. “Long way back.”** ** ** **

********He stood from the wall and approached her. “Did you ask Lexa to go back?”** ** ** **

********“Yes.”** ** ** **

********“And?”** ** ** **

********She looked away and pushed back her tears. “She said she can’t.”** ** ** **

********Murphy groaned in frustration. “Well Tell her you’re not with Bellamy!”** ** ** **

********“No.” She shook her head. “I want her to come back cause she wants to come back not because of me.”** ** ** **

********He rolled his eyes. “And you think I’m the idiot?”** ** ** **

********“No.” She smirked. “I know your an idiot.”** ** ** **

********Lexa came out of her room. “Good morning.” She said to them both. She frowned when she seen that Clarke had her bag over her shoulder. “You’re leaving already?”** ** ** **

********“Yeah.” She swallowed. “I got a long trip ahead of me.”** ** ** **

********“Oh.” Lexa looked sad. “I’ll drive you.”** ** ** **

********“No. I have already put you all out.”** ** ** **

********“No you haven’t.”** ** ** **

********“It’s fine.” She shrugged. “After being stuck in space for 6 years I love the walking through the forest. I missed it.”** ** ** **

********Madi came bounding out of the room. “Heya prisa!”** ** ** **

********Clarke smiled sadly. “Heya goufa.”** ** ** **

********The girl walked up to Clarke and hugged her waist. “You leaving today?”** ** ** **

********“Sha.”** ** ** **

********Madi hugged her tight around the waist, “Im Gonna miss you!”** ** ** **

********Clarke held Madi tightly. She wanted to know this child more and it made her sad that she wouldn’t get to be part of her life. “Me too.” She said quietly.** ** ** **

********Jay jay came out of the room and ran to Clarke. “Princess!” He ran into her arms. Clarke held him on her hip.** ** ** **

********“Good morning jay jay.”** ** ** **

********“Are you leaving?”** ** ** **

********“Sha.”** ** ** **

********“I’m gonna visit one day!”** ** ** **

********She chuckled. “I hope so.” She kissed him on the cheek and let him down. Emori hugged her. “Come to Polis if you have any issues.”** ** ** **

********“I’ll be fine.” she smiled.** ** ** **

********“Murphy?”** ** ** **

********“Clarke?”** ** ** **

********“Take care.”** ** ** **

********He smiled kindly at her. “I will princess.”** ** ** **

********Lexa stood forward. “I’ll walk you out.” She said quietly.** ** ** **

********“Mochof.” She smiled.** ** ** **

********When they got outside Clarke grabbed lexas hand knowing she wouldn’t be able to anymore. Lexa looked at their entwined fingers and smiled. “I can drive you back Clarke it really isn’t a bother.”** ** ** **

********“It’s fine Lexa. I missed this when I was up in space.”** ** ** **

********“Ok.” She said quietly.** ** ** **

********When they got to the clearing Clarke placed her bag on the floor and wrapped her arms around Lexa’s waist and buried her face in the brunettes shoulder. “I’m gonna miss you.” She said sadly.** ** ** **

********“Me to.” Lexa croaked.** ** ** **

********Clarke took a big breath and pulled back. She ran her thumb over the brunettes jaw and looked into the green eyes that she missed so much. “I’m glad you have them.” She said honestly. “You have a beautiful family Lexa.”** ** ** **

********“Thank you.” She smiled through her tears.** ** ** **

********Clarke kissed Lexa on the cheek then picked up her bag. “Ok I guess this is Bye then.” She said softly.** ** ** **

********Lexa felt the urge to hold the spot on the cheek that Clarke just kissed. But she didn’t. She felt a lump in her throat. “I suppose it is. Bye Clarke.” Lexa said sadly watching her walk away. “May we meet again.”** ** ** **


	14. Chapter 14

When Clarke got back to Polis Raven was waiting by the tree line. “What the Hell! You don’t know how to use the radio all the sudden!” The woman marched up to Clarke and shook her head. “I’ll yell at you later! So?”

Clarke let her bag fall to the floor. She had kept her promise to herself and didn’t cry the whole trip, until now. Seeing her best friends hopeful expression made her walls crumble. Lexa was not coming to Polis. She looked at Raven as the tears rolled down her cheeks. “So.... um. I need a pet.” She smiled sadly trying to make a joke.

Raven moved quickly towards her and hugged her tight. “I’m so sorry Clarke.”

Clarke held on to Raven tightly so she wouldn’t fall to the floor. “It’s ok. She’s happy. Her family is great even Murphy.” She sniffled. 

“He still an asshole?”

“Yes.” She pulled back. “But he loves them all.”

Raven sighed. “Come on. Let’s go back so you can rest.”

“Ok.”

Just as they were walking away the heard the rumblings of a car. 

...........................

Lexa took a moment before she walked back into the bunker. She was sad to see the blonde go but she wasn’t going to keep the blonde from Bellamy or her duties.

She walked into the bunker. “So!” Murphy asked. 

She looked at him confused. “What?”

He threw his arms in the air. “So when are we leaving?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Come on Lexa? She came here for you!”

Emori stood by Murphy. “She clearly loves you Heda.”

“No she doesn’t.” She sighed. “I’m going to go for a walk.”

........

Lexa walked and walked. She went on with life for the next two days. She couldn’t get the blonde out of her head. She couldn’t forget the sad look on her face when she told her she couldn’t go to Polis or the heartbroken look when they both said goodbye. She couldn’t forget how good it felt to have Clarke in her arms at night or how good she was with Madi and jay jay, how proud the blonde was of the work she had accomplished in Polis. 

She was currently having breakfast with everyone and she was looking at them thinking how being in Polis would effect them. Emori is due any day now and if she was in Polis she would have the best medical care there is. Clarke would make sure of it. Both the children would have an actual education and again Clarke would make sure they would get the best care and Murphy, Murphy would be happy if his family was happy cause that’s who he was and herself, she would be content knowing that her family was well taken care of. In regards to Clarke she would just have to accept that the blonde has moved on and be happy to have Clarke in her life even if it is just as a friend.

She sighed. “I think we should take a trip to polis.” Everyone froze and looked at her. “Just to see If it’s for us.”

Murphy smirked. “Took you long Enough.”

The kids screamed with joy and ran from the table to pack their bags. 

Emori smiled at her. “You sure Heda?”

“Sha.”

“Ok lets go then!”

....................

Murphy stopped the car at their usual spot near polis. Madi jumped up in down in the seat. “Nomon look it’s Clarke!”

Lexa got out of the car followed by everyone else. 

The blonde looked at the car shocked. “Lexa?”

Lexa smiled. “Clarke.”

The kids ran to Clarke almost knocking her over. She laughed but she was still shocked.

Raven walked up beside Clarke and watched as Murphy stepped out of the car. “Well well Well. John Murphy.” She looked Him up and down.

“Raven Reyes.” He drawled.

Emori walked to Raven. “I’m Emori, Johns wife and this is our child jay jay.”

Raven looked at the kids then back to Emori then to a smug looking Murphy. “How?! Just how did you manage to score a hot wife and children!”

He shrugged. “Beats me.”

“Don’t think I haven’t forgotten either Murphy.” She said referring to her getting shot in the back.

He rolled his eyes. “Yeah.” He went to the back of the car and came back with a container. “Here I made you this for you as a peace treaty.”

She looked at it then opened it and her nostrils were filled with smells she had not once encountered. He handed her a fork and she took a bite. She moaned as she ate more. “You got more of this?” She said with her mouth full of food.

“Yeah.”

“Ok I forgive you.”

Lexa came and stood in front of them, Clarke ran her hand up Lexa’s arms just to check if she is real and she’s not imaging this. “Lexa? What are you doing here?”

Lexa shrugged. “We just came to look to see if it’s suitable.”

Clarke smiled and hugged the brunette. “I’m glad.”

.................

The first place Clarke took them too was the tower. The kids were in awe especially when they got on the elevator. Madi held Clarke’s hand the entire way there. Pointing at things and asking the blonde questions that she happily answered. 

Guards were in shock looking at Lexa but she didn’t seem to phased by the attention she just nodded at them politely and continued to where Clarke was leading her.

When they got to the top floor Clarke had ordered people to have two rooms set up near hers. John insisted on looking at the kitchen so him and Emori took the children with Raven leading the way. 

Clarke and Lexa were left in the room alone. As Clarke was about to speak there was a knock at the door. 

Bellamy entered. “Hey princess I heard you were back.” He seen Lexa. “Oh Hey Lexa! Your back!”

She smiled politely. “Heya Bellamy.”

Clarke moved towards Bellamy and held the door open so he can leave. “Bell we were kinda in the middle of something.”

When he walked passed her he whispered. “Is she here for you?” She rolled her eyes and pushed him out. “Did you make a move?”

She blushed. ”shhhh.”

“I want details princess!”

She closed the door and looked at a very confused Lexa. “You didn’t have to ask him to leave just for me Clarke.”

She shrugged. “It’s fine.”

Lexa shook her head. “The tower looks good.”

“Thank you.” Clarke moved towards her then hugged her tight. “I’m so glad you came.”

Lexa sighed and hugged her back. “Me too.”

.....................

After Raven showed Everyone the kitchen she took Murphy Emori and jay jay to the clinic while Clarke took Madi and Lexa to the School.

The school wasn’t too big but Clarke explained it would get bigger the more children were reproduced but at the moment there wasn’t a lot of kids. It could fit about 150 students. Clarke had explained there would be different age groups and the Bellamy was in change and he was actually going to be a teacher. Lexa thought it suited him well. Lexa was overall impressed but then again nothing Clarke did was short of amazing. 

As they were leaving the hairs on the back of Lexa’s neck stood up, she felt a blow beside her face and she turned swiftly held the arm of her attacker and threw them over her shoulder. She smirked when she realised who it was. “Indra?”

Indra grinned as Lexa helped her from the floor. “It’s good to see you haven’t grown lazy of your training Leksa.”

Clarke stood with Madi and rolled her eyes. “Was that really necessary Indra.”

“Yes.”

Lexa laughed and hugged her old general. “It’s good to see you Indra.”

“You as well.”

Madi walked over beside Lexa. “Indra, this is my daughter Madi, Madi this is Indra.”

Indra held out her arm and the little girl took it in the warriors hand shake. “Have you been training too child?”

“Of course!” Madi laughed. “Nomon has been training me and jay jay and even uncle Murphy!”

Indra looked at Lexa with her eyebrow raised “John Murphy?” She drawled.

“Sha.” Lexa smirked. “It has not been easy.” 

“I can imagine. Lexa, Octavia has eagerly been awaiting your return so you can both spar. Care to join me?” Indra said proudly.

“Of course Indra.”

“Actually.” Clarke said. “We have plans Indra.”

“Can it not wait wanheda?”

Clarke huffed and rolled her eyes. “I suppose not.”

Lexa stood close to Clarke recognising her agitation. “How about you take Madi to the clinic and give her a check up?”

Clarke beamed at the thought that Lexa trusted her enough to take Madi for a check up by herself. “Ok.” She smiled. 

.......................

“Leksa kom trikru.” Lexa heard as she walked into the training grounds. She watched as Octavia held down a man three times her size.

“Octavia kom Skaikru.” Lexa smirked. 

Octavia stood “Well well well the almighty commander of blood has returned.” She grinned.

Indra rolled her eyes and looked at Lexa apologetically “As you can see Leksa my second still has an attitude problem.”

Lexa smiled. “Don’t all Skaikru have an attitude problem Indra?”

Octavia chuckled. “That’s true.” She shrugged. “So you want to spar?”

Lexa looked around. There were warriors that stopped what they were doing to watch the interaction, some even ran of, Lexa assumed this was to get more people to come watch, she realised there would be a bit of an audience. “Are you sure you want to do this here? I do not want to embarrass you.”

Octavia looked at her shocked. “Excuse me....oh we are soooo doing this here.”

Lexa shrugged. “Fine.” Lexa took off her jacket and walked into the sparing grounds. 

.....................

Meanwhile Clarke walked into in the clinic holding Madi’s hand who was looking around in awe. She spotted her mother looking over equipment. “Hey mom.”

Abby turned and smiled when she seen her daughter. “Clarke!” She said happily engulfing her in a big hug.

Clarke rolled her eyes but she loved it. She pulled back from her mom and held Madi around her shoulders. “Mom this is Madi, Madi this is my mother Abby.”

Madi hugged the older woman and looked at her sweetly. “Hi!”

Abby chuckled and hugged the little girl back. “Hi.”

“I Just want to give Madi a check up.”

“Well.” Abby looked at the girl. “John, Emori and Jay Jay are just through those doors also getting checkups how about you go wait with them while I chat to my daughter.”

“Ok!” She ran off.

Abby smiled fondly. “She’s a lively one?”

“Yeah.” 

“So That’s Lexa’s daughter?”

“Yes.”

Abby sat down at a chair and patted a spot next to her. “So your trip was successful then? come on honey I want to hear everything.” Ever since Clarke returned her and her mother’s relationship had improved. Abby now respected Clarke and vice versa. So Clarke told her mother everything with no need to hide information from her any more. She told Abby once how much she loved Lexa before the death wave but when Lexa left Polis Clarke showed up at Abby’s door and vented and cried into the night about the brunette. Abby held her all night just listening.

She sighed as she sat down. “It’s complicated mom.”

Abby held her daughters hand. “Have you told her you and Bellamy aren’t together?”

“No.”

“Clarke why on earth not?!”

“Because I don’t want her to stay for me mom.”

“For the love of-.” Abby sighed. “You are the most stubborn person on earth Clarke Griffin.” Abby shook her head.

“I’m not stubborn mom I just want her to be happy.”

Abby held up her hands. “Your making a mistake.”

“It’s mine to make Mom.”

“Like I said, most stubborn person on earth.”

Clarke smiled at her mother. “Maybe.”

The door burst open and Indra was holding up both Lexa and Octavia. Both of them injured, bleeding and laughing. 

Clarke rushed to Lexa. “What the hell happened?!”

Indra shrugged. “They sparred.”

Clarke let go of Lexa and smashed Octavia into the wall holding her by her collar. “What. The. Fuck!”

Lexa pulled Clarke back by the waist. “It’s fine Clarke.”

Octavia frowned at her. “You know I’m Heda right? You can’t just throw me around.”

“Like I care Octavia!”

Abby came stood between them. “Ok let’s get these two cleaned up.”

Clarke glared at Indra. “You got an explanation?”

“They sparred.” She shrugged. “Most of Polis turned up to watch it was quite the spectacle.”

Clarke shook her head and lead Lexa to the nearest bed. “Yeah that’s not happening again.” 

Lexa smirked. “It is fine Clarke I won anyway.”

“What!” Octavia yelled. “I fucking won!”

Lexa laughed. “No you didn’t”

Octavia looked at Indra. “Indra! Tell her!”

Indra shrugged and looked Octavia sympathetically. “It was a close call second.”

She gasped and stood from the bed pointing at Lexa then the door. “Let’s go!”

Clarke turned sharply and shoved Octavia on the bed. “I’m not joking Octavia there is to be no repeat of this shit!”

Octavia huffed and sat back down on the bed.

Clarke shook her head and walked towards Lexa and stood between her legs to assess her injuries. She walked away to get supplies. When she came back She started to wipe away blood from her face. “Are you mad Clarke?” Clarke ignored her. “Clarke?” Clarke sighed.

Octavia laughed. “Wanheda is mad....”

Clarke turned and glared at Octavia making her shut up. She turned back towards Lexa and started stitching a cut on her cheek making the brunette hiss. 

Abby approached Octavia. “Come on Octavia we will go to another room.” She groaned but complied with Indra following behind.

When they left Lexa held Clarke’s hips. “You are angry?”

“You think!”

“Why?”

“Why? Are you serious right now Leksa! Your all cut up!”

“It was sparring Clarke those things happen.”

“Not to this extent!” She huffed. “You both are not to do this again!”

“Are you going to make me Clarke.” She smirked.

“Lexa.” She said in warning. “I’m not joking.”

“You can’t tell me what to do.”

“Yes I can Lexa!” Lexa looked at her confused. “Look.” She said calmly. “Clearly you and Octavia have no limits. I don’t like seeing you get hurt Ok so please promise me you won’t fight her again.” She cupped both of her cheeks. “Please?”

Lexa nodded. “Ok. But just so you know I won.”

Clarke rolled her eyes but smiled. “Thank you.” She said relived. “Now sit still while I fix you up.”

...............................

By the time everyone finished with their check up and Clarke finished fixing Lexa up it was nightfall and time for dinner. Murphy offered to cook which Clarke agreed to knowing Murphy would get his own way eventually plus she knew he was a good cook. Clarke had a room in the tower for dinning and led everyone there staying close by Lexa and Madi the entire time. When they sat down Madi sat on Clarke’s lap talking about the check up she had and all the interesting things she noticed about Polis. Clarke smiled and sat there Listening adding her opinion and facts every now and then. Lexa sat by them watching on and smiling.

Bellamy entered the dining hall. “Princess!” He shouted.

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Yes Bellamy.”

He walked over to the table and chuckled. He sat down opposite Lexa and next to Clarke. “Who is this cutie?” He pointed to Madi.

Clarke smiled. “This is Madi, Lexa’s daughter.”

He held out his hand. “Hi Madi It’s nice to meet you.”

She shook his hand. “You too! Hey are you going to be my teacher!”

He smiled widely. “Sure am!”

“Great!” She Beamed. 

He chuckled and looked at Lexa. “Lexa I see you and my sister caught up.”

“Sha.” She smiled. “Is she still telling people she won?”

He laughed. “Yes but don’t worry no one believes her.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “I really don’t think it’s a laughing matter Bellamy.”

Bellamy made a face at Clarke when she wasn’t looking making Madi giggle. The blonde looked at him and rolled her eyes. “Bellamy.” She warmed.

“Clarke.” He said back just as serious. 

Lexa chuckled. “Perhaps we shouldn’t anger her anymore.”

“But why it’s so fun.”

Clarke picked up a bread roll and threw it at him. He caught it and took a bite making Madi giggle again. “You’re not funny.”

“Madi thinks I’m funny.”

Madi laughed. “He is funny Clarke.”

“Who’s side you on goufa?” 

Lexa shook her head in amusement. “I would like to hear your plans for the School Bellamy.”

He smiled widely. “Are you free tomorrow!”

She looked at Clarke. “Do we have plans tomorrow Clarke?”

Clarke smiled. “Not all day.”

“Great!” Bellamy clapped.

..........................

Lexa had just put Madi down to sleep and she was out on her balcony enjoying the view when she heard a knock on the door. She opened the door and was pleasantly surprised to see Clarke. 

“Clarke?”

Clarke was speechless. Lexa was wearing boys shorts and a very tight singlet. She looked hot. “Ah Hi.”

“Hello.” She said opening the door. “I was just out on the balcony enjoying the view. Would you like to join me?”

“Sha.”

They both made their way outside and sat on the chair that was out there. “It’s good to see Polis alive again.” She smiled at Clarke.

“Yeah?”

“Sha over the past 6 years I have made my way to Polis either alone or with everyone else and I would just look over it. It was strange it was almost like it was dead and I was waiting for it to come back alive. Does that make sense?”

“Of course lexa. This was your home for so long.”

Lexa nodded and looked back over Polis. She realised it was late and Bellamy wasn’t with Clarke. “It’s late Clarke, doesn’t Bellamy wonder where you are?”

Clarke rubbed her neck. “Ah no not really.”

Lexa frowned. “He doesn’t worry about your whereabouts?”

“No.”

“He doesn’t wonder why your not in your bed with him.”

“No.”

“Clarke is something wrong?”

“No.”

Lexa frowned and moved closer to her. “Has Bellamy done something to upset you?”

Clarke shook her head. “No.”

“I apologise Clarke I don’t mean to pry and I say this with all due respect but You tend to get yourself into a lot of trouble I constantly had to have guards watch you and yet Bellamy is your intended and he doesn’t care about your where abouts?”

Clarke laughed. She couldn’t help it, it’s true and she knows it’s true. She does tend to have trouble following her wherever she goes. When her laughter settled down she looked at the brunette who was looking at her concerned, the blonde smiled and held her hand. “Lexa. It’s fine.”

“Chit? Did he hurt you Clarke? I’ll make him pay.”

Clarke shook her head. “No I promise.”

Lexa took a deep breath. “Good. I just started liking him.” Lexa looked at her seriously. “Will you tell me if something or someone was upsetting you.”

Clarke wrapped her arms around her shoulders and hugged her tight. “Of course Lexa.” She Let go and led Lexa to the chair and sat down. “How do you like Polis so far?”

Lexa smiled widely. “It is wonderful Clarke, you have done an amazing job.”

She looked away nervously. “Is it somewhere you could maybe call home again?”

Lexa sighed. “I don’t think I have a choice in the matter.”

“What? Of course you do.”

“The kids, Murphy and Emori love it here. I’ll stay if they are staying.”

“What?” Clarke frowned. “No. You will do whatever makes you happy.”

Lexa sighed. “I didn’t say that I didn’t like it here Clarke.”

“No but you basically insinuated that you’re only staying for your family.”

“Is that a bad thing?”

“Yes!”

“Why?”

“Leksa if you don’t want to be here you should just leave!”

Lexa looked at her sadly. “Do you not want me to stay?”

“What?” She frowned and moved closer to the brunette. Clarke cupped her cheek and ran her thumb over the tattoo behind her ear. “Of course I want you here, if I didn’t I wouldn’t have asked you Leksa but this decision should be yours. You should do what makes you happy.” She ran her hand down the brunettes neck and held her shoulder. “I want you to stay because you want to stay. You deserve all the happiness is the world. It’s your choice and what ever you choose I’ll respect even if it means I’ll miss you.”

Lexa moved towards the railing of the balcony and looked out over Polis again. In the distance she could see huts that had been set up. “Do you think I could live out there?”

Clarke stood beside her and placed her hand on the brunettes back rubbing soothingly. “Amongst the people?”

Lexa turned and smiled. “Sha.”

“Hmm.” She frowned. “I think that you could do whatever you want.”

“But?”

Clarke sighed and turned towards the brunette. “But...I think that a life amongst the people would be to dull for you Lexa.” Lexa went to argue. “Just listen.” She said gently. “You have been to Polis three times Lexa since we landed back to the ground and each time you have made suggestions that would improve everyone’s way of living. Ever since it had been announced that you were alive almost everyday an ambassador, warrior, healers, guards....just heaps of people in general have asked to see you. Your special Lexa.” The blonde stepped closer to her. “You’re a born leader. People admire and respect you and even when you were in the bunker you found ways to lead. You can have a life down there.” She smiled looking towards the lights. “If that’s what you want but somehow I think you will find your way back to the tower.” 

Lexa looked a Clarke then back down to Polis. Lexa knew the blonde was right. “Perhaps when I’m elderly then.”

Clarke laughed and held Lexa’s hips. “I can see it now.” She smiled. “Little old Lexa living in a hut amongst the people. Yelling out orders, telling stories all day long. Chasing people around with your walking stick.” 

Lexa chuckled and placed her hands on Clarke’s waist. “What about you? Do you think you will ever live amongst the people.”

Clarke grinned. “Yeah. I’d live next to little old Lexa and we can both chase people around with our walking sticks and keep count of how many people we get. I’d win of course.”

“Oh really?”

Clarke nodded and buried her face in Lexa’s shoulder. “Mm Hmm. You would let me.”

Lexa held the blonde tight. “Yes I would.” She sighed. “You are a bit of a sore loser.”

Clarke pulled back. “What! I am not!”

Lexa smirked. “I beat you at chess twice and you paced the room looking for ways I could have cheated.”

“No.” Clarke shook her head. “No I was shocked cause I had literally just taught you how to play. You won your first two games of chess against ME who have played it since I was a kid! I was not a sore loser I was in shock!”

Lexa chuckled. Then she looked down to the lights again. “Do you think that one day we will get our someday.”

Clarke turned Lexa face towards herself gently. _“Leksa fali ‘ma’ mba den yu fig raun” _(Lexa it’s closer then you think.)__

__Lexa smiled softly thinking about that morning with Clarke. She gripped the blondes waist and her eyes glanced to the blondes lips. Then back to her sky blue eyes. Eyes that she has dreamt of so often. She cupped her cheek and ran her thumb over her soft skin. She wanted to kiss her. She wanted so badly to smash their lips together but Then she remembered that Clarke was with Bellamy. “I hope so.” She said softly as she stepped back._ _

__Clarke sighed. “Right well I better get back then.”_ _

__“Sha.”_ _

__Clarke scratched the back of her neck. “It’s late though, um do you mind if I stay with you and Madi?”_ _

__“Won’t that bother Bellamy?”_ _

__“No not really.”_ _

__Lexa frowned. “But won’t he-“_ _

__“Lexa trust me it’s not an issue.”_ _

__“Oh. Well ok then.” She shrugged. “Of course you can stay Clarke.”_ _

__Clarke smiled as Lexa lead them to the bed. Madi was on the right side so Lexa got in the middle and held up the blankets. Clarke got under the covers and placed her head on Lexa’s chest and wrapped her arm around her middle. “You’re warm.”_ _

__Lexa smiled and ran her hands through Clarke’s hair. “You have the strangest compliments. Clarke?”_ _

__“Mmmm”_ _

__“Are you sure this will not upset Bellamy?”_ _

__“Sha.”_ _

__“He is strange Klark. I would never allow you to share a bed with another if you were mine.”_ _

__Clarke felt goose bumps rose from her toes to the tip of her ears thinking about one day being Lexa’s. “Good night Lexa.”_ _

__“Reshop Klark.”_ _


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey people. Just want to say that I appreciate the comments and I appreciate that most of them have been respectful. I understand to some extent what people are saying about Clarke not telling Lexa. I hope this chapter clears up a couple of things.

Clarke woke to giggling, she smiled knowing it was Madi. She felt the little girl playing with her hair. When she opened her eyes she realised that she was still sleeping on Lexa’s chest who at this point was still asleep. “Good morning Clarke.” The little girl smiled

Clarke wiped her eyes and removed her head off Lexa’s chest. “Morning goufa.” She smiled. She lied down by Lexa and propped herself on her elbow looking down at her. 

The door opened and jay jay came running full speed and jumped on the bed making Lexa open her eyes. “To early.” She grumbled as she turned towards Clarke. 

Both the kids giggled and ran out of the room passing Murphy who looked tired, irritable and annoyed and who lied down beside Lexa, making Clarke frown. “Do you make a habit of sleeping in Lexa’s bed?” She asked.

Lexa held Clarke’s hand so the blonde wouldn’t get to upset. “First off....Don’t be disgusting Clarke and second off, I could ask you the same question.”

“Why are you here?”

Murphy sighed and pulled a blanket up around his shoulders. “Emroi is angry at me so I’m hiding.” He yawned. 

Lexa Sighed. “What did you do?”

“JOHN!” They all heard outside the doors Murphy jumped off the bed and hid under it. 

Clarke looked at Lexa confused but Lexa just smiled and closed her eyes. 

The door burst opened. “Lexa where is he!” Lexa pretended like she was sleeping. Emori glared. “I know you’re awake Heda!”

Clarke chuckled. “What did he do?”

“He ate my cake!”

“Oh.” Clarke said confused. “Was this some sort of special cake?”

“No! It was MY cake!” She walked to the foot of the bed. “Let me tell you something wanheda. You do not take a pregnant woman’s food!”

“Ok.”

“So where is he!”

“Under the bed.”

Murphy jumped out. “Traitor!” He said running out of the door with Emori yelling after him.

Lexa started laughing. “You gave him up?”

“Sha.” Clarke smiled lying down next to Lexa. “I’m sure he deserves what’s coming to him.” 

Lexa nodded in agreement. “Sha.”

Clarke ran her fingers through Lexa’s hair making her close her eyes. “I have to go.”

“Where?”

“Got to go see the ambassadors. You could come?”

Lexa shook her head. “No I told Bellamy I would meet with him today.”

“Ok.” Clarke smiled and ran her hand down Lexa’s arm. “I can’t believe you’re here.” She frowned. “Not in Polis But here as in alive.” She sighed. “I never thought I’d see you again Lexa.” 

Lexa gently reached out and tucked a strand of blonde hair behind Clarke’s ear. “I know the feeling.” She said softly. “When I woke for the first time and Murphy or Emori didn’t know if you survived or not I too thought I would never see you again.” Lexas eyes watered at the memory. “But I am here now Clarke and maybe we were suppose to go our separate ways.”

Clarke placed her hand on Lexa’s hip. “You really believe that?”

“Sha. Because if I had lived we would have fought together and we still would have reached the same outcome but the difference is I would have followed you.” She closed her eyes and pushed back the tears. “And if I had Madi would surely be dead.”

Clarke gripped Lexa’s hip making her open her eyes. “Hey.” She cupped her cheek. “Don’t think like that ok?” Lexa nodded and took a deep breath. “Your right. You were suppose to be here and I was suppose to be up there. We are both here now though.” 

“Sha.” Lexa smiled. 

Clarke wiped away the tear that fell. “Don’t think like that again ok?”

“Sha.”

“Good.” Clarke looked out the window behind her. She sighed and looked back to Lexa. “ I have to go.”

“I understand.” 

She placed a gentle kiss on the back of Lexa’s hand. “Have fun with Bellamy.”

“I will try.” 

.............................

Bellamy knocked on Lexa’s door not long after Clarke had left. He directed her to his room which was on a different floor. It was smaller then Clarke’s and most of his room was taken up by his office. He had books scattered everywhere along with papers. Lexa thought it was strange that Bellamy had a room separate from Clarke but assumed this was his working space.

The brunette grinned. “How do you get any work done in here Bellamy kom Skaikru?”

He shrugged. “What? I have a system!”

She rolled her eyes playfully. “I am sure.”

He chuckled and asked her to sit at the desk. He was showing her programs for the children and the different ages groups and what they would be learning, he was proud that most children would be attending school. He was disappointed that some would not because of the old ways. 

“It will take time Bellamy but once people see what a difference an education will make to a child they will want their child to be a part of it.”

He sighed. “I know.”

He continued talking about the school and Lexa realised that Bellamy was a really good man. He has the best interest of the children at heart. He really wants the school to be successful. She had always known that he was a good man even before the mountain fell. She was shocked when she found out he was apart of the slaughter outside Arcadia. She always wondered why he took such measures. 

“Lexa?”

She shook away her thoughts “Mmm. Yes.”

He smiled. “I asked what you thoughts were so far?”

“My apologies Bellamy. Everything you have told me is beyond what I imagined was possible. I can not wait to see it all implemented.”

He smiled largely at her. “Thank you that means a lot.” 

She frowned. “Can I ask you something Bellamy?”

“Of course Lexa.”

She sighed thinking about the best way to approached the subject. “Do you care for Clarke?”

He frowned at her. “Of course. She’s my best friend.”

“I mean no disrespect Bellamy but I’m worried as to why she spent last night sleeping with me and Madi and not you.”

His eyes widened. “Oh.”

“Nothing happened though we are just friends.” She assured him. “We have a lot of history and I. I care for her and sometimes I feel as though Clarke will put herself last and others first even if it makes her unhappy.”

“Yes.” He nodded. “I completely agree.”

“So knowing what Clarke is like perhaps you should ask her why she would rather spend the night in a bed that is not yours.”

“Oh.” Bellamy gulped. “I think you need to talk to Clarke.”

She nodded again. “I apologise if I’m overstepping-“

“Hey no.” He shook his head. “No listen ok.” He smiled at her softly. “Do you know when I realised for the first time that Clarke loved you?” 

“No. She doesn’t-“

“Lexa? Come on, you know she does.” Lexa shook her head in denial. “Well I’ll tell you. After everyone thought you were dead there was a moment in the trading post. We all went there because Alie had taken over Raven and we were trying to figure out a way to bring her back, anyway Jasper went to smash the flame and she screamed at him not to because it was you. That’s when I knew that she loved you Lexa. She was holding on to this piece of tech that had a part of you in it.”

“Oh.” Lexa said trying to work out in her head how she feels about that.

“I couldn’t understand why. I didn’t get why she loved you. You left us to die.” Lexa went to argue. “No no just wait, I’m not here to make you feel guilty just trying to make you understand I guess.” he said scratching the back of his neck. “When we were stuck in space I had a lot of time to think because really there was nothing else to do. She was so miserable Lexa. She didn’t really have time to mourn on the ground but like I said we had nothing but time up there.” He pointed above his head. “We all did some horrible things. You left us at mount weather to save over 200 hundred of your people without bloodshed. Clarke pulled a lever killing 200 people to save so little of ours and I.” He swallowed. ”Killed 300 warriors while they slept because at the time I thought it was what was best for Skaikru and because I was angry and hurt.”

“Yes.” Lexa shook her head. “Yes we have all done some terrible things.”

“Yeah and that’s what took me so long to understand. I will forever have to live with what I did on that field that night. I wake up from nightmares, I see there faces and hear their screams. I see Clarke’s disappointed face and even till today things have not been the same between my sister and I. Some days she is nice to me then next it’s like she remembers what I did and what I did ultimately lead to Lincoln’s execution.” He wiped a tear that fell. “I did that too her, to them. I felt like dying up in space, there was nothing to do but think about what I did, I just wanted to die Lexa. Clarke. She offered me forgiveness and I NEEDED it. I didn’t understand But I understand now Lexa and before me and Clarke started a relationship she told me she was still hung up on you but it was just so easy with her you know? She’s my best friend, my co leader, it just was easy-“

“Bellamy-.”

Bellamy reached over the desk and held her hand. “You need to speak to Clarke. Trust me Lexa.”

She nodded. “Ok I will and I do trust you Bellamy.”

He looked at her sadly. “I’m sorry I killed those people. I’m just so sorry.”

Lexa squeezed his hand. “I forgive you Bellamy.” He smiled through his tears. “That’s why your working so hard on this school?”

“Yes. I took away so much and now I’ll die trying to give back as much as I can. I swear it.”

“I believe you.”

“I’m ok, me and Clarke are ok and I hope that one day me and you could be friends.”

“Friends?”

“Yeah.” He chuckled. 

“I think i would like that.”

.....................

In the throne room there was a meeting with the ambassadors. Octavia was sitting in the throne with Indra by her left side and Clarke by her right   
side. The ambassadors where talking about territory that is until the trikru ambassador stood up. “Wanheda, Red Queen. We have all heard of Lexa’s return, we would like to hear her input on all issues concerning the rebuilding of Polis.”

Clarke stood up straight. “I appreciate that you have a great respect for our former Heda. Tishana kom trikru, I also respect her opions and input.”

“As do I.” Indra said proudly.

“Me too.” Octavia said with a smirk.

“In saying that, it is Lexa’s choice whether or not she wants to put in her input. You may have seen her walking around Polis.” The ambassadors nodded. “She has already added her opinion on improvements and things that we can do to better our society but I’ll be sure to let her know your all eager to speak with her once more.”

Just then the door burst open. Madi ran into the room and slowed down when she realised that she was interrupting something. “Moba.” she whisper yelled. She ran up to Clarke and hugged her waist. 

Clarke chuckled and smiled down to the girl. “Can I help you goufa?”

“Can I spend time with you I’m bored.” She whisper yelled again. 

“Sha But you must be quiet.”

Madi nodded and turned to all the ambassadors. She stood up straight beside Clarke with her hands behind her back much like her mother. 

Octavia shook her head in amusement. “Moving on is there any other issues?”

The ice nation ambassador stood. “Sha Heda. Ice nation would like to see if there is anything left of Azgeda.”

“There’s a little bit.” Madi said happily.

The ambassador frowned. “Have you seen it.”

“Sha. It’s not very big but there’s a little land but most of the land that is left is trikru.”

Clarke chuckled and hugged her to her side. 

“And how do you know this child?”

Clarke looked at Octavia desperately not wanting anyone to know yet that Madi is Lexa’s child. Even though there is peace that decision should be hers. “Ok that’s enough for today meeting is over.” Clarke sighed in relief and sent Octavia a warm smile.

When the ambassadors left Indra chuckled. “Only a child of Leksa kom trikru would disturb a coalition meeting.”

Madi turned to Clarke. “Did I do something wrong?”

“No.” She said cupping her cheek. “Come on let’s go eat.”

Madi grabbed Clarke’s hand and pulled her out of the room. 

.................

Lexa made her way to the tower to see what Madi was up too and to also see if Clarke was free to talk. The conversation with Bellamy left a lot of unanswered questions.

She ran into Murphy and smirked at him. “You still in trouble brother?”

Murphy grinned. “Nah I used my charm.”

Lexa chuckled. “You mean you cooked her a bigger an even better cake?”

“Yeah like I said I used my charm.”

Lexa shook her head in amusement. “Where’s Madi?”

“With Clarke.”

“Clarke? I thought she was having a coalition meeting?”

“Yes but your daughter didn’t care and ran into the meeting anyway.”

Lexa rolled her eyes at her daughters antics. “Do you know where they are now?”

“Eating.” He shrugged. 

..................

Lexa walked into the dinning area and watched on as Madi sat in Clarke’s lap talking to her excitedly about anything and everything. She smiled and lent against the wall with her arms crossed observing the two. Clarke was listening to Madi intently and laughing at the things Madi was saying. 

Clarke looked up and noticed her, she smiled warmly and waved her over. 

Madi seen her and her eyes lit up. “Nomon! Guess what?”

“What?” Lexa smiled and she lent Down and kissed her daughters head. 

“I was part of the congenda meeting today!”

“I heard.” She looked at Clarke. “Moba Klark.”

Clarke chuckled. “It’s fine. Made the meeting a little more exciting.”

“Sha they can be a bit draining.” Lexa sat down next to Madi and Clarke.

“Tell me about it. How was your time with Bellamy?”

“Good we are friends now.” She frowned. “He is currently making us a friendship bracelet. I have never heard of this custom before?”

Clarke laughed. “He’s an idiot.”

Lexa smiled. “It’s nice. I have never had anyone make me any jewellery before.”

Clarke stopped laughing and looked at her seriously. “I can make you jewellery Lexa.”

“That’s not necessary Clarke.”

Clarke shook her head and held up her hand. “Nope it’s done.”

Lexa placed her hand on the blondes back smiling at her. “You don’t have to but I know you will because you are stubborn so thank you.”

Clarke smiled and kissed Madi on top of her head and moved her off her lap. “I have to go do something, I’ll see you both tonight at dinner?”

“Sha.” They both replied. Lexa held her wrist gently. “Ai gaf chich Yu op pas” (I need to talk to you later.)

Clarke smiled. “Of course.”

.......................

Clarke ran into Bellamy’s room, he was sitting at his desk working on his friendship bracelet. “Stop!” She said bending over to catch her breath.

Bellamy jumped. “What!” He said looking around.

She stood up with her hands on her hips. “You can not make her a bracelet before I make her something!”

“What? Why!”

Clarke pointed at the bracelet. “She’s never received jewellery before! I have to be the first one to give her some!”

He threw the bracelet on the table. “Oh man but look it’s so awesome!”

Clarke looked at it briefly it was a band made from leather and had some silver on it. Bellamy was right it was awesome and very much Lexa’s style. “You can not give her that!”

“Clarke come on!”

“No look after I give her something you can but I have to be the first. It’s important to me Bell.”

“Urgh. Fine.” He huffed. “Your lucky your my best friend.”

She sat at the desk and smirked at him. “You sure your not trying to replace me Bell, I never got a friendship bracelet.”

He laughed. “Guess I like her more princess.” She picked up a paper scrunched it up and threw it at him. “I’m glad you’re here I need to talk to you.”

“What did you do?”

“Nothing.” He held up his hands. “Promise But Lexa was asking why you were in her bed last night and not mine.” He smirked.

“Oh.” She smiled shyly. “You didn’t say anything right?”

“Of course not but you should.”

She sighed. “Bell-“

“No Clarke listen. For once in your life can you just listen?”

“I do-“

“Nope! This is you not listening.” She rolled her eyes. “Good now look I understand your reasoning for not telling her that we aren’t together princess but your making a mistake. She was sitting there right where you are and she was concerned for you Clarke, she clearly still loves you, you have to tell her before she finds out from some one else and she will and not because anyone would betray you. It could slip out and I can tell you now if she doesn’t hear it from you she will feel hurt.”

“But what if she stays for me?”

He shrugged. “What’s wrong with that? What’s wrong with wanting to stay near your loved ones?”

“I don’t want her to feel obligated Bellamy. This isn’t her life anymore. I’m the leader now and she is free from that burden. I come with that burden and if she stays I want it to be because she likes it here. I love her Bell but I can’t leave here not yet. She deserves to be happy.”

He lent back in his chair and sighed. “You know Lexa better then me Clarke, tell me does she do or has done anything that she HAS to do or does she do want she wants?”

Clarke frowned. “She has made decisions as commander-“

“But she’s not a Commander now. She’s Lexa. Just Lexa and I’m asking you if Lexa does anything she doesn’t want to do.”

“No.” She said softly.

“There you go.” She smirked. “I really didn’t feel comfortable lying to my new best friend by the way so can you hurry up and tell her now.”

She chuckled. “Float you.”

......................

“Raven!” Clarke called as she walked into Raven’s room. “Please don’t be doing the nasty with Echo?”

Raven came out of her bathroom. “Not today princess.”

Clarke sighed in relief. “Good, I’m still scarred from the last time I accidentally walked in on you both.”

“You should have knocked!”

“It was in the kitchen Reyes!”

Raven chuckled. “Oh yeah.” 

“Look I need your help Ok I need to make Lexa some jewellery?”

“Like a wedding ring or something.”

“What!” Clarked eyes widened. “No!” She smiled. “Maybe one day though.”

Raven rolled her eyes. “You are so disgustingly in love it makes me sick princess.”

“What ever. Can you help me?”

“Sure. What you have in mind.”

“I want to make her a ring.”

“Like an engagement-.”

“No raven, just a nice ring.”

“Ok cool. I’ll help ya. And lucky for you I have gold.”

“What how?”

Found some when I was out scouting. When the death wave hit a lot of thing resurfaced.”

“Ok.” She smiled. “Let’s get to work I want it done by tonight.”

..............................

Lexa sat on her balcony once more while Madi slept. Polis was now covered in what Monty calls fairy lights. Raven explained they are all powered by the sun. It was gorgeous, Lexa could honestly sit here all night and take in the sight. There was also small fires from camps and lamps. It was so much better then the Polis she ruled in. She smiled thinking that this is what she wanted for Polis. 

Clarke didn’t show up for dinner so she assumed that the blonde must have been busy. She missed her even though it was only hours. She spent dinner laughing and joking with Murphy, Emori, Bellamy and Raven. Echo was busy cooking Ravens dinner but from the look Echo gave her when she served her she enjoyed it. She was happy for Echo, it would have been hard to be ruled by a queen who didn’t care about her people. Raven honestly bought out the best in her. Much like Clarke did for her back then. 

Lexa heard a knock on the door. She got up and answered it. When she pulled the door open Clarke was standing there looking nervous. Lexa seen her look Lexa up and down. “Do you wear actual clothes to bed?” Clarke smirked. 

Lexa looked down to herself, she was wearing underwear and a singlet. “I am wearing clothes.” She raised her eyebrows.

“You’re in your underwear Lexa, What if it was someone else who knocked on the door?”

“Clarke kom Skaikru.” She smiled. “You are the only person in Polis past and present who comes to my room so late at night. I’m truely shocked you knocked.”

Clarke smiled. “Haha Heda, can I come in?”

“Sha.” She opened the door to allow the blonde in. Lexa lead her to the balcony.

“Sorry I couldn’t make it to dinner I lost track of time.”

Lexa sat on the chair and Clarke sat beside her. “It’s fine Clarke, you missed quite a show though.”

“Oh?”

“Sha. Bellamy and Murphy argued about food the entire time. It was humorous.”

Clarke laughed. “I’m sure.”

“What were you doing?”

“Ah” Clarke pulled out a little leather bag and handed it to Lexa. “Well I made you this.”

She looked at the little bag then back to Clarke puzzled. “What is it?”

Clarke chuckled and moved closer to her. “You have to open it to find out Leksa.”

“Oh.” Lexa opened the little bag and pulled out a beautiful gold ring with emeralds in it. “Clarke.” She gasped. “It’s beautiful. I can not accept this.” She held out the ring for Clarke to take. But Clarke rolled her eyes and took the ring off Lexa and held her hand. She put the ring on her middle finger. 

The blonde smiled. “I’m so happy it fits.” She said proudly.

“Clarke-“

“Lexa I told you I would.”

“Sha But I did not expect it so soon. This must have taken up your whole day.”

Clarke shrugged. “Since lunch. It looks beautiful on you Lexa.”

Lexa looked at the ring and was overwhelmed. “Clarke I don’t know how to repay you I have never received something like this.”

Clarke held her hand. “You don’t have to repay me, I enjoyed making it for you.”

Lexa stood up quickly. “I have to give you something in exchange.”

Clarke stood up laughing. “Lexa it’s a gift.”

Lexa looked at the ring again then to Clarke. She wrapped her arms around the blondes waist and buried her nose in Clarke’s neck. “Thank you.” She said softly.

“Pro.” Clarke said wrapping her arms around Lexa’s back holding her tight. She pulled back and sat down on the chair. “We have to talk.”

Lexa sat down next to her. “Of course is something the matter?”

Clarke looked away. “I need to tell you something.”

Lexa looked at her and held her hand. “You can tell me anything Klark.”

Clarke nodded and took a deep breath. “Me and Bellamy are no longer together.”

“What?” She frowned. “Was it because you slept in my bedroom last night. I’m sorry I had to tell Bellamy I was worried-“

Clarke chuckled. “No Lexa that’s not the reason.” Clarke started to play with Lexa’s fingers. “I was satisfied. We both were.” She smiled at the brunette. “We are best friends and we have been through a lot together and I do love him and he loves me but not like a soon to be married couple should. We both came to the conclusion that it was easier being together then being alone.”

“I’m sorry Clarke. When did this happen?”

“That doesn’t matter.”

Lexa stood. “Did I have something to do with this?”

Clarke stood up with her. “Leksa it doesn’t matter.”

“Of course it matters Clarke. It’s my fault!”

“No it’s not! did you just hear anything that I just said?.”

Lexa started pacing. “I did this.” She said quietly. 

Clarke stopped Lexa from pacing by placing her hands on her upper arms and gently pushing her against the wall. “I told you that day. I told you I didn’t have everything i wanted.”

“Clarke-“

Clarke cupped her cheek. “No just listen. I didn’t plan on being with anyone after we left earth Lexa. I accepted that I’d die alone. The only reason I started anything with Bellamy was because Raven suggested it. If I had of known...if I had any idea at all that you were alive even if I thought that I would never come to earth again I would have never started anything with him.” 

“But-.”

“But Nothing.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Cause I don’t want you to move to Polis for me. I want you to be happy Lexa.” Clarke lent her forehead against the brunette and wrapped her arms around her back hugging her. “I know you enjoy being a mother and an aunt and a sister. Like you said three months ago I’m the leader of these people now, this is my life, it’s not yours anymore, I don’t want you to have the same burdens as you did as Heda. I can’t leave yet Leksa. I just can’t.”

“What about your happiness?”

Clarke chuckled sadly. “I’d be happy just to be your friend Leksa. If that’s all you can give me I will take it.” She pulled back and cupped the brunettes cheeks. “Please don’t let this sway your decision.”

Lexa pulled back and looked into sky blue eyes. She seen nothing but love. She pulled her close and kissed her on the lips making Clarke moan. Clarke backed Lexa up against the wall and pushed her lips against the brunettes making Lexa gasp giving Clarke an opening to push her tongue in. Clarke felt like her whole body was on fire. She wanted to touch Lexa everywhere she has dreamt about this for the last 6 years, she just didn’t know where to start. Lexa pulled back to take a breath but Clarke had no intention of stopping so she staring leaving little kisses and bites on lexas neck. 

Lexas eyes rolled in pleasure. “Clarke?”

“Mmm.” She replied while running her hands over lexas very toned stomach making her core burn with desire. 

Lexa ran her hands up Clarke’s ribs and over her arms to cup the back of Clarke’s neck. “Clarke we have to stop.” 

Clarke pulled back abruptly thinking she overstepped. “I’m sorry Lexa I got carried away.” She said backing up. 

“No.” Lexa smiled pulling her close. “No I want this but.”

Clarke shook her head and went back inside the bedroom not ready to hear the rejection from Lexa. She cursed herself for rushing things. 

Lexa followed Clarke quickly. “Clarke!” Lexa whisper yelled so wouldn’t wake up Madi. 

Clarke ran to the bedroom doors as the tears welled up in her eyes. She stopped when she felt a pair of arms around her waist. She tried to move but Lexa held her firmly in place. When Clarke stopped struggling Lexa lent back against the wall with Clarke to her front. 

“Clarke?”

Clarke took a big shuddering breath. “I’m sorry Lexa.” Clarke felt Lexa move her hair to one side. The brunette then started leaving little kisses on her neck. 

“Clarke can you turn around and look at me?” She said softly in the blondes ear. Clarke shook her head not able to talk because of the lump in her throat. “Beja?” 

Clarke sighed and turned in lexas arms. She pressed her forehead to lexas shoulder to embarrassed to look at the former Commander. “I’m sorry.” She repeated again.

Lexa held her tight and kissed her ear. Rubbing her back up and down trying to calm the blonde. “What for?”

“For taking things to far.” She croaked.

Lexa held her tight. “Can you please look at me.” When Clarke didn’t answer Lexa Sighed. “I won’t let you go till you look at me.” Clarke sighed and lifted Her head to look at Lexa. Lexa smiled gently at her and cupped her cheeks. She wiped away the tears with her thumbs. “You didn’t do anything I did not want.”

Clarke frowned. “You stopped-“

“Yes.” Lexa laughed. “Because Madi is asleep in the room.”

Clarke blinked away the tears. “Oh. So it wasn’t unwanted?”

Lexa held Clarke by the hips and bought the blondes body towards her so they were flush. “Did it feel unwanted?”

“Up until you told me we should stop. No.” Clarke looked away. “I just don’t want to push you into anything again Lexa.”

Lexa frowned confused by the blondes statement. She gently cupped her face and turned it towards her. “What are you talking about Klark?”

Clarke looked down to lexas stomach and gently ran her hand up her shirt. She stopped when she felt a slight lump. The scar from the bullet that Clarke thought ended the former commanders life. The blonde looked at Lexa. “This was because of me.”

“Chit?” Lexa said softly, still confused 

“You were shot because I made you go against years of traditions.”

“Is that what you really think?”

“Yes.” 

“Clarke...” Lexa said gently, placing her hand over Clarke’s. “You didn’t make me do anything. I wanted to stop blood must not have blood for so long,I just did not know how to go about it. It wasn’t till I meant you that you made me realise that my vision of peace had to start with blood must not have blood. I truely believed that if the bloodshed was stopped then we could move forward. This!” She said holding the blondes hand against her scar. “Was because of a foolish old man who realised to late that the vision that i had, that you had could come to fruition. You didn’t make me do anything Clarke. That was not your fault.”

Clarke sobbed and buried her face in lexas neck. “Feels like my fault.”

Lexas heart broke for the blonde, Clarke had been going for 6 years thinking she was the cause of her death. She sighed and hugged her tight. “It’s not. I know you are stubborn, I know you are strong willed but I beg you Clarke please believe me when I say that what happened that day was not your fault.”

Clarke pulled back and took a shuddering breath. “Im not sure it’s that easy.”

“We have a lot to discuss Clarke between you and I. If we are to be together we have to let go of the past. There’s nothing we can do to change it. There is no point in dwelling on it. Even if you do not believe me when I say it was not your fault what happened, you have to let it go.”

Clarke shook her head. “I will NEVER get the image of you dying out of my head Leksa. I STILL have nightmares about it.”

Lexa cupped both the blondes cheeks. “Klark.....I didn’t die. I’m right here.”

Clarke sighed and pressed her forehead against Lexa’s. Both women were almost knocked over by little arms around their waist.

“Clarke! Why are you crying!” Madi exclaimed half asleep. She looked to her mother. “Nomon fix her!”

Both women chuckled. 

Clarke wiped the tears from her eyes and smiled at the little girl. “I’m ok goufa.”

Madi squinted her eyes at Clarke and glared at her mother. “You’re lying.” She pouted. 

Clarke smiled and ran her hand through the girls hair. “I am a bit upset but.” She said smiling at Lexa. “I will be ok.”

Madi nodded. “Well.” She said as she yawned. “Will you be staying with us again Clarke?”

Clarke looked to Lexa for permission. When the brunette smiled and nodded Clarke smiled at the girl. “Sha.”

Madi held both Clarke and Lexa’s hand and dragged them back to the room. Madi climbed into bed holding Clarke’s hand. She positioned herself in the middle so Clarke and Lexa could sleep on either side of her. She cuddled up to Clarke. “Who upset you Clarke?”

“No one”

Madi looked over her shoulder at Lexa. “It wasn’t you was it Nomon?”

“If it was?” She smirked.

“Nomon it would be very awkward if I had to defend Clarke against you.”

Both woman laughed. Lexa playfully poked madis side making her giggle. “You think you can beat me?”

“Sha.” The girl laughed. 

Clarke hugged Madi to her side. “No need goufa.” 

“Mmkay.” She yawned and started to drift off to sleep. 

Lexa wrapped a blanket around the three of them and held both Clarke and Madi closely. “We will talk tomorrow?”

“Sha.”

“Goodnight Klark.”

“Night leksa.”


	16. Chapter 16

“Lexa!” 

Lexa jumped from her bed as Murphy burst opened the door. He was white as a ghost. Lexa looked to her left and Madi and Clarke also had jumped out of their bed. 

“Brother What is it?”

“Emori. She. She....”

Lexa ran up to Murphy and held him by the shoulders. “What happened?”

“She’s bleeding.”

Clarke ran from the room to find Emori, Lexa dragged a shocked Murphy with her. “Madi?!”

“Coming Nomon!” 

When Lexa got to the room Emori was sitting on the edge of her bed crying with Jay jay beside her hugging her side. She was holding her stomach and blood was running down her legs. Clarke knelt in front of her. “Emori we have to get you to the clinic.”

John stood there shocked. Lexa turned to him. “Brother. Snap out of it Emori needs you!”

He took a deep breath and nodded. He picked Emori up bridal style and smiled softly at his son. “It will be ok jay jay. I need you to stay with Madi ok?”

“Nontu....”

“Son. I need you to be strong can you do that for me? For your mother?”

The little boy held his head high as Madi stood next to him. “Sha.”

Murphy nodded and ran out the room with Clarke leading the way and Lexa beside her. He looked at Emori she had her eyes closed crying. “John?”

“It will be ok?”

“What if...”

He kissed her forehead. “It will be ok.” He repeated. 

Lexa watch on her heart breaking. She felt Clarke’s fingers intertwine with hers. She couldn’t look at her right now because she felt like breaking and one look from the blonde would send her to tears and she needed to be strong. She felt Clarke kiss her shoulder the move to the front of the elevator and held the radio to her mouth. “Mom? Come in mom?”

“Clarke?”

“Mom Meet me in the clinic, something is wrong with Emori she is losing a lot of blood.”

“Copy that.”

When the doors opened they rushed out and made their way to the clinic. When they arrived Abby was already in scrubs directing them where to go. Murphy laid Emori on the bed while Clarke and Abby set up the ultrasound. Lexa pulled John back so he wasn’t in the way. He tried to move back. “Let them work.” She said softly. 

Clarke watched the screen as her mother ran the device over Emori’s stomach. “The baby has the ambillical cord wrapped around their neck. This baby needs to come out now mom.”

“I agree. Get the nurses to set up an operating room.”

Clarke nodded and ran out of the room. Abby looked at John. “John get some scubs on.”

“Lexa?”

Abby nodded. “She can come too.”

They both quickly started undressing as Abby moved the bed into another room. Murphy ran up beside Emori and held her hand. “John I’m scared.”

He pushed back his tears. “Me too.” He said softly. “But you are in the best hands and me and Lexa are not leaving your side Ok?”

She smiled at him. “If anything happens to me-“

Lexa cut her off. “Do not think like that.” 

When they got in the room there were two other people. Abby looked at Emori. “Emori we are going to do all that we can to get your baby out safe but to do that you will need to be put to sleep.”

“Do what you have too.”

Abby nodded as she put the mask over her face. “Count backwards from 10.”

“10. 9. 8. 7-“

Abby and Clarke set up a curtain so that Lexa and John couldn’t see what was happening. Murphy sat by Emori’s head trying not to cry and Lexa sat by John rubbing his back. 

After thirty minutes Lexa watched as Clarke held up a baby girl. She cried slightly, the blonde moved her to a different section of the room while Abby continued to work on Emori. 

“Shit.” Clarke said. 

“Talk to me Clarke?” Abby said while she was still working on Emori.

“She’s not breathing.”

Murphy gasped as tears rolled down his cheeks. Lexa wrapped her arm around his shoulders. Both of them thinking the worst. Nurses rushed to Clarke’s aid. 

“You know what to do.”

“Yup.” Clarke said confidently. 

Sixty seconds had gone past with no word from Clarke. Murphy squeezed his eyes shut leaning towards Emori. Thinking how could he would tell his wife if anything happens to their baby. 

Lexa held him silently crying. “Clarke?”

Another sixty seconds. “Ok.” Clarke said. She left the baby with the nurses and walked over to the both of them. “She’s ok.” Both of them let put a relived sighed. “She needed help breathing but that’s common in these types of situations. But she’s fine. We will have to monitor her for a couple of days but she’s strong.” Clarke smiled. “Would you like to see her?”

Murphy shook his head. “No I’ll wait for Emori to wake.” He looked at Lexa. “Lex.” His voice cracked. “Can you...I don’t want her to be alone..”

She wiped the tears from her eyes and kissed the top of his head. “Sha bro.”

Clarke held her hand as she walked her to the baby. There lying on a little table was a little baby girl. As Lexa held the little hand the baby blinked her eyes opened. “She’s small.” 

Clarke chuckled. “Sha.” 

Lexa continued to hold the little baby’s hand rubbing soothing circles on the back of back of her little hand. She had black hair and a chubby face. “She’s beautiful brother.” Lexa said over her shoulder. 

Murphy smiled and wiped his eyes. “She gets her good looks from me.”

Lexa laughed and looked back to the baby. “Clarke is right. She’s a fighter.”

Murphy smiled. “Now that she gets from her mother.”

Lexa wiped away more tears. She felt a pair of arms wrap around her waist. “They will both be ok.” Clarke whispered in her ear. Lexa nodded and smiled. She felt Clarke kiss the back of her head. “Im going to go help mom. Ok?”

Lexa smiled over her shoulder. “Sha.”

..................

Clarke lent against the door frame smiling at the scene in front of her. Emori was holding her daughter for the first time. Both her and Murphy cried happy tears. Madi and jay jay stood by Lexa on the other side of the bed watching in awe of the little girl. Lexa noticed her and smiled warmly. She waved her over but Clarke shook her head she didn’t want to intrude. She was just happy that Emori and the baby are happy and healthy. Murphy looked over his shoulder and smirked. “You coming in princess?” Clarke looked at him and he smiled at her. She realised in this moment this was Murphy inviting Clarke her into this family and she knows how hard that is for him. She nodded and walked towards Lexa and stood by her. Lexa held her hand and smiled at her. Emori looked to Clarke with tears running down her face. “So John and Lexa tell me you and Abby saved my baby. Thank you Clarke. I don’t know how to repay you.”

“You don’t owe me anything Emori. This is why my and mom worked so hard to build the clinic.”

Emori nodded. “I want to help. I want to be part of this clinic in someway.”

Clarke smiled. “I’m sure we can find you someway to contribute.”

“Mochof.”

“So what’s her name.” 

“Rebel.” Emori replied

Clarke chuckled. “Rebel?”

“Sha.”

John shrugged. “It’s appropriate.”

There was a knock at the door. Indra stood there looking at Clarke.

“Wanheda Charmaine needs your immediate attention.”

Clarke groaned. “Where is Octavia?”

“Heading over to the prisioners now.”

Clarke rolled her eyes and looked at every. “Sorry.” She sighed. “I’ll find you all later.”

Lexa stopped her from leaving. “Can we talk later.”

“Of course.” Clarke smiled before she turned away.

...................

Lexa was sitting in the clinic with John, Emori, Madi and jay jay. Murphy was sitting next to her nursing Rebel and Emori and the kids were sleeping. It had been a couple of hours since Clarke had left.

“So.” John smirked. “Clarke slept in your bed again?”

Lexa smiled at him. “Sha.”

“What’s that about huh?” He teased.

“She and Bellamy are no longer together.”

Murphy grinned. “Bout time she told you.”

“You knew?”

“Yeah since she came for her visit. I told her to tell you but she Is stubborn.”

Lexa chuckled. “Sha.”

“So what’s on your mind?”

She sighed and lent back in her chair. “I like Polis brother.”

“But?”

“But I feel lost.”

“I think that what you need is to talk to Clarke about what your feeling but just so you know I agree agree with her.”

“What?”

“Yes Lexa. I know it’s shocking. I agree with the princess.” He looked at her seriously. “You deserve to be happy sister. You never really had a choice to be here. You were dragged here as a child and you had to fight to the death to survive and then you became commander and fought for the people. I know you loved it here but you weren’t really here because you wanted to be here. That choice was taken from you and now the princess is giving you a choice because although you no longer bare leadership burdens...Clarke does. She is Wanheda, the mountain slayer. The chancellor. Hell Lexa she has more power and influence then Octavia who is the commander/queen. If you stay it won’t be like it was for us back at the bunker where we went fishing and swimming when ever we pleased. If you stay and you and Clarke get your shit together and actually BE together then you will have to bare some of her burdens as well.” He grabbed her hand softly. “She’s giving you an out Lexa and you don’t need to feel bad or guilty if you decide that this life here in Polis is not for you anymore.”

Lexa had tears well up in her eyes. “I feel so torn bro.” 

Murphy moved closer to her an nudged her shoulder. “You need to talk to Clarke.”

“What if my decision hurts her.”

“She will understand.”

Lexa nodded. “I have to talk to Clarke.”

“Not shit.” Murphy smiled. He looked down at his new born baby with tears in his eyes. “How did I get so lucky to have a beautiful wife how gave me two children?” He looked back at her. “How did I get so lucky to gain a sister and a niece.”

She wrapped her arm around his shoulder. “We are both lucky brother.”

...................

It was late by the time Clarke had finished dealing with the prisoners. She sighed as she stepped out of the elevator and onto her floor. It had been a long day and she was looking forward to a nice long bath and then she was going to seek out Lexa no matter how late it was but she didn’t have to go far as the brunette was leaning against her door with her eyes shut. “Hey.”

Lexa pushed herself off her door and smiled at the blonde. “Hei Klark.”

Clarke loved the way Lexa said her name. She rushed toward the brunette and melted into a warm embrace. She had her arms wrapped about the brunettes waist and buried her nose in her neck. She took a deep breath exhaling Lexa’s unique scent. She pushed the brunette against the wall and playfully started to sniff her neck over and over making the brunette laugh. “You smell nice.”

“Klark that tickles.” She chuckled. 

“Oh yeah.” The blonde smiled. “Does this.” She said then starting pecking Lexa all over the side of her neck.

Lexa pushed Clarke back again. “Yes.” She laughed. Clarke smirked then pushed the brunette back and started pecking her face. “Clarke!” She laughed. 

Clarke stopped and wrapped both her arms around the brunettes neck and heavily leaned on her. “How is everyone?”

“Good.” Lexa said placing her hands on the blondes hips.

“I missed you.”

“Me too.”

Clarke smiled and lent in slowly till there lips were inches apart. Then Lexa closed the distance between them. It was a soft kiss. Gentle.

Lexa smiled. “I need to talk to you.”

Clarke nodded. “Ok.” She said as she lent in and started nibbling on Lexa’s neck. 

Lexa’s eyes rolled in the back of her head. “This is not like any conversation I have had before.”

“Mm.” Clarke pulled back. “You can’t deny that it’s a conversation you like Heda.” Clarke lent in and captured her lips again.

“True.” She said between kisses. She put her hand on Clarke’s shoulder and gently pushed her back. “Beja?”

Clarke groaned. “Ok can I at least go for a bath first?”

“Sha. Take your time.”

...............

Lexa was sitting on Clarke’s bed waiting for Her, when Clarke emerged from the bath room she was wrapped up in just a towel. The blonde sat down next to Lexa and held her hand. “Are you going to get dressed?”

“Soon. I already kept you waiting long enough.” Clarke smirked. “Am I distracting?”

Lexa ran her fingertips down Clark’s neck trailing down her arm. “It has been a long time Clarke.” She gulped.

Clarke frowned, at first she didn’t understand what Lexa meant. She looked at Lexa in her eyes and seen the nervousness. “Oh.” Clarke said softly and gripped Lexa’s hand. “Hey we don’t have to do anything Lexa. I honestly just wanted to get out here as soon as possible I was in the bath for thirty minutes already.”

Lexa nodded. “What if we...and I’m not...it’s just been so long.”

Clarke kissed her cheek softly. “Well you know the old saying right?” She grinned. “Practice makes perfect. So I guess we will just have to keep making love over and over and over again till you feel comfortable.” Lexa laughed. “I love it when you laugh.” 

Lexa smiled and kissed her lightly on the lips. “That sounds reasonable.”

“So What did you want to talk about?”

Lexa sighed and decided to just come out with it. “Klark. I feel torn.” 

Clarke frowned and moved closer to her. “Ok. How? Talk to me Leksa.”

The brunette turned towards the blonde. “I like not being in charge.”

“Ok?”

She sighed and stood up. “I have been there and I have done that.” She turned and looked down to the blonde. “My time as a leader has passed Clarke. You know I was thrown into the world of politics since I was four when the fleimkeepers found me.”

“Of course.” She said reaching out for the brunettes hips gently and pulling her closer. “I remember. You said your parents hid you when ever they would come to trikru but eventually they found you.”

“Sha and then executed my mother and father for doing so.” She sighed realising she hadn’t thought of her mother an father in a while. “Madis parents did the same thing you know.”

“Yeah. She told me.”

Lexa smiled softly and cupped the blondes cheek. “It makes me happy that you are both growing close.”

Clarke kissed the inside of her hand. “It’s not hard Leksa. She is special. Like you.”

“I’m not special.”

Clarke scoffed. “Yes you are.”

“Clarke I don’t want to be a leader but I don’t want to leave you.” Lexa rubbed the back of her neck feeling her muscles tense in stress.” She felt Clarke squeeze her hips. 

“Hey?” Lexa looked down at Clarke. “Come here.” She said softly. The blonde pulled until Lexa was straddling her thighs. Lexa wrapped her arms around Clarke’s shoulders and Clarke wrapped her arms around Lexa’s back so she wouldn’t fall. The blonde looked at Lexa in her eyes and seen the brunette was trying to hold back her tears. She looked away but the blonde kissed her jaw. “Look at me Leksa.” Lexa Turned her head. “I’m not asking you to be a leader.”

“What would I do then?”

“I don’t know.” Lexa rolled her eyes and tired to move off the blonde but Clarke held onto her firmly. “Leksa just wait. Please.” Lexa huffed and shook her head. “Look. I’m just being honest ok. I don’t know what you would do here or what your place would be in Polis but I promise you I wouldn’t make you do anything you don’t want to do. You and your family are safe here. I just want your place to be by my side. That’s all. We don’t have to rush into anything right now. We can figure it out.” She moved her hands up Lexa’s back and held the back of her neck softly. “Together?”

Lexa smiled. “Together.” She leaned down and kissed the blonde softly. She felt Clarke pull her body to her so they were closer and moaned into the kiss. 

“Ewww!” They both jumped apart when they heard Madi. They both turned towards the girl standing at the door. She had her eyes covered. “Clarke! Are you kissing my mother!”

“Ahhh.” She said “umm yup.” She nodded. “You got a problem with that goufa?” She said playfully.

Lexa rolled her eyes. “You can uncover your eyes now Madi.”

Madi lowered her hands slowly. She glared at Clarke. “Why are you kissing Nomon!”

“Cause she’s good at it.”

“Klark!” Both Lexa and Madi yelled at the same time making her giggle. 

Clarke moved towards the girl. “Because I care for her.” She said softly.

“Aren’t you with Bellamy?”

“Nope.”

“Yes!” She ran out of the room. Lexa stood next to her and laughed as she heard the little girl yell. “Raven! You owe me!” Clarke shook her head and walked to the door. She watched as Madi banged on Raven’s door. 

“Ugh.” Raven answered. “What do you want you little turd it’s late.”

“You owe me tech lessons!”

“What.” She yawned.

“Nomon and Clarke were just kissing I bet you they would get together! And I won!”

Raven looked towards Clarke’s room and smirked at the sight. Lexa was standing behind Clarke with her arms wrapped around the blondes waist. “You bet against me Reyes?”

Raven groaned. “Didn’t think you had the balls princess.” She shrugged. “Ugh ok I owe you lessons now get lost twerp it’s late.” 

Madi squealed and hugged Raven around the waist. “Oh my god your so adorable it’s disgusting.” She playfully pushed the girl away. “Go on get lost.” 

Lexa chuckled. “Madi go back to bed I’ll be there soon.”

“Ok.” She said happily. She ran to the both of them and hugged them tight then ran off.

Clarke turned in Lexa’s arms. “You go ahead I’ll get changed and meet you?” 

“Sha.” She kissed the blonde again. 

Clarke smiled watching her walk away. “Progress.”She said quietly.


	17. Chapter 17

Clarke woke before Lexa and Madi and sat on the balcony. The sun was rising, this was always her favourite part of the day. She smiled as she felt the heat hit her face. She heard a yawn and turned to see Madi stretch. Madi smiled at her although she looked half asleep. She made her way to Clarke and slumped into her lap.

Clarke smiled. “Make yourself comfortable goufa.”

Madi groaned and snuggled into Clarke. Clarke hugged her and kissed the top of her head. “It’s early.” Madi said quietly.

“Sha. I like watching the sun rise.”

Madi frowned and turned her head to watch the sun slowly rising over the mountains. “Why?”

Clarke shrugged. “I suppose because I spent most my life on a space ship wondering what it would look like from the ground.”

“It is nice I guess.”

Clarke grinned. “That’s just because you haven’t seen it from a good view. come on.”

Clarke held madis hand and took her through a passage way that lead to the top of the tower. It wasn’t actually the top since the death wave took a lot of the tower. It looked like a level but without a roof and walls. There was still some debris around but no one knew of this place only Clarke. She stumbled across it one day when she was avoiding Bellamy. It was a good hiding place. Clarke sat on the floor and Madi once again sat in her lap.

“Wow.” The little girl said. “It’s amazing.”

“Sha. No one knows of this place.”

“Really! So it’s mine and yours then!”

“If you like mads.”

“Yea!” She wrppaed her arms around the blondes neck. “Our secret place!”

Clarke laughed and pointed at all the places Clarke wanted to improve. Madi sat there taking it all in. She eventually fell asleep. Clarke lied back with one hand behind her head and Madi resting on her chest. She smiled cause for the first time in a long time she felt happy.

.......................

“Hey Lexa!” Bellamy said as she sat down beside her in the dinning Hall.

“Good morning Bellamy. Have you seen Clarke and Madi?”

“Nah.” He shrugged shoving a whole piece of bread in his mouth. “Prasbolly gettin up ta oh goof.”

She smirked at him. “Bellamy swallow before you speak you might choke.”

He shook his head and went to talk again but started coughing and choking on the bread. Lexa hit him on his back to help him. He eventually stopped coughing. Lexa covered her mouth trying not to laugh. “Shut up.” He said playfully.

Lexa laughed and a shook her head. “Now you have finished choking what were you saying.”

“I said that they are probably up to no good.”

“True.”

Bellamy pulled something out of his pocket and put it in front of Lexa. It was a little leather bag. She looked at it then back at Bellamy. “Go on!” He said excitedly.

Lexa shrugged and opened the little bag. It was a beautiful hand crafted leather bracelet with a piece of medal on it that said. “Lukot.” (Friend)

“Bellamy?”

“It’s out friendship bracelet!” He said excited. He held up his wrist and showed her the exact same one. 

“Wow.” She smiled. “Thank you Bellamy it’s wonderful.”

He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and bought her in for a a side hug. “Your welcome. Tell you the truth.” He looked around and whispered in her ear. “My best friend is a pain in the ass I’m looking for an upgrade.”

Lexa laughed. “You are strange Bellamy.”

“Not as strange as Raven.”

“No one is as strange as Raven.”

“Who’s calling me strange?”

Both Lexa and Bellamy looked up to see Raven and Echo come in the room. “We both are Reyes.” Bellamy smirked.

Raven huffed. “Says you.”

“And Lexa!”

Echo smiled. “And Echo.” 

Raven pouted. “You all suck.” She looked at the food. “Food!” She said happily sitting down at the table with Echo sat down next to her.

Jay jay ran into the room followed but Murphy, Emori and the baby. The little boy Sat down next to Bellamy and started stuffing his face. Bellamy laughed. “And I though I was bad.” The little boy looked up to him and smiled with a face full of food making everyone laugh.

John came up behind Lexa and kissed the top of her head. She smiled at him watching him move towards jay jay. “Son one thing at a time.” Jay jay tried to argue with a mouth full of food causing half of it to be spat at Murphy. He playfully glared at his son. “Oops.”

Emori chuckled and kissed Lexa on the top of the head and handed the baby to her. “Honestly John, he gets that from you.”

“Wuft.” He said with a mouth full of food.

She rolled her eyes and sat down next to him. “Idiots.” 

Lexa smiled at the scene around her and realised that this was her new home. She smiled down to the little baby in her hands. 

Bellamy cooed at her. “She’s so little! And cute!” He smirked to Murphy. “She must get her looks from her mother.”

Murphy shrugged. “Yeah.”

“Can I have a hold?”

Emori smiled. “Of course.”

Bellamy smiled and held out his hands. “Don’t hog her Lexa!”

Lexa rolled her eyes and handed him the baby. He smiled adoringly. “I want one.” He said softly.

Lexa smiled. “I’m sure you will one day Bellamy.”

She went to drink the water on the table. Bellamy looked at her. “You could have my babies.” 

Lexa starting coughing and hitting her chest choking on the water. Everyone at the table looked at him shocked. “Chit!?” She said grasping for air.

“I mean.” He blushed. “Um well if you ever want kids or whatever you can have my sperm.”

“Holy fuck.” Raven looked at him wide eyed. “I can’t not watch.” She said. her mouth hung open.

Murphy laughed and hit the table. “Blake? Did you just offer to impregnate my sister!?” He said between chuckles. 

“I mean yeah.” He shrugged. “Not in a gross way though!”

Lexa was still looking at him with wide eyes. “Bellamy I like you as a friend I can’t make love to you.”

Just then Clarke walked into the room with Madi. Madi ran to Lexa and kissed her on her reddened cheeks then sat down next to Raven. Clarke however stood at the doors frozen in place. 

Raven nudged Echo. “Babe do you think Clarke will kill Bellamy? Or just hurt him?”

Bellamy’s eyes widened looking at Clarke. “What! No!”

Emori looked behind them. “She won’t kill him.” 

John shrugged. “She might.”

Bellamy looked like a deer caught in headlights. “Ah no that’s not what I meant! I mean. Shit!” Clarke walked over to Bellamy and gently took the baby from his arms. He jumped up quickly. 

Echo laughed. “Run Bellamy!” 

As Clarke handed the baby to Emori, Bellamy ran to the doors and Clarke ran after him. “What the hell Bellamy Blake!” She yelled.

Lexa stood up. “Excuse me.” She said to everyone at the table leaving and running after them. 

When she rounded the corner. Bellamy was holding the door to the kitchen as Clarke was trying to get in. “Open the door Bellamy!” The blonde yelled.

“No way princess! I want to live!”

She groaned pushing on the door. “You have to come out sometime asshat!”

“Yeah! When Wanheda goes home and I can calmly speak to Clarke!” He yelled through the door.

Lexa stood by Clarke. “Is this some weird I custom don’t know of.”

Clarke stopped trying to open the door and looked at Lexa. “What?”

“By accepting this friendship bracelet.” She held up her hand. “Does this mean I now have to have babies with Bellamy?”

She could hear Bellamy gasped from behind the door. “No!” They both yelled. 

Clarke kicked the door. “You gave her jewellery then asked to have sex with her!”

“What! No!”

Lexa rubbed her temples. “I’m so confused.” She gently removed Clarke from the door. “I’m going to get him to open the door. Promise you won’t hurt him?”

She crossed her arms. “No.”

“Klark?”

She groaned and said. “Whatever.”

Lexa turned around and knocked. “Bellamy it’s me. Lexa. Can you open the door, I have made Clarke promise she won’t hurt you.”

The door opened slowly. He stood there sadly. “I’m sorry.”

Lexa frowned. “You have to explain Bellamy.”

“Yes Bellamy.” Clarke grit her teeth. “Explain.”

He scratched the back of his neck. “Ok.” He held up his hands. Looking at Clarke over Lexa’s shoulder. “I don’t want to have sex with Lexa. All I was saying is that um.” He took a deep breath. “I just meant....” he scratched his head trying to look for the words. “Ok so I want kids right and I’m not getting any younger and I know that Lexa is into woman exclusively and can’t have babies so all I said with my big mouth is that she could have my sperm if she ever wanted to have kids.” 

Clarke looked at him wided. “All that you said? You make it sound like you’re offering her a piece of cake! How long have you been thinking about this?!”

He shrugged. “Five minutes.”

Lexa frowned. “How could Bellamy get me pregnant without having sex?”

“Are you actually considering this!”

“Clarke.” She sighed. “I’m so confused.”

Bellamy stepped forward. “What would happen is that a doctor would take my sperm and put it in like this syringe thingy then put it in you.”

“Oh.” 

He shrugged and put his hands in his pocket. “I’ve always wanted kids. Sorry I sprung it up on you like that it’s just, I was looking a the baby and I don’t know said the first thing that came to my head. I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable Lexa.”

She smiled at him. “That’s quit alright. It’s sweet now I think of it.”

Clarke was standing back with her mouth hung open. “Sweet!?”

“Sha. Don’t you think Clarke?”

“Ah no I do NOT think it’s sweet. I think he’s a dick!”

Lexa laughed. “Yes well. That too.”

“Come on princess I’m not some creepy perv.”

She huffed. “That’s debatable Bellamy!”

“You love me.”

“Nope.” She crossed her arms. “Your a dick.”

Lexa laughed and turned fully towards the blonde. She cupped her cheek. “Don’t be jealous.”

Clarke threw her hands up in the air. “Well Lexa it’s not everyday that a person offers to have a baby with the woman you care about.”

Lexa kissed her softly. “I would never do anything like that without you support Clarke.”

She relaxed. “Ok.” She smiled. “Come on I’m hungry.”

Bellamy walked up beside her. She elbowed him in the stomach. “Dick.” She smiled.

He grunted. “Love you too.”

.....................

When breakfast was finished Octavia found Lexa and asked if she would like to accompany her and Indra to the training grounds. Clarke glared at Octavia. “Octavia.” She warned. 

But she held up her hands. “Not to spar princess.”

Clarke let out a relived sigh. “Ok.” She smiled and kissed Lexa on the cheek. 

Madi held Clarke’s hand. “Can I spend today with you Clarke?”

“Always.” She smiled down to the girl. She gave Octavia one last warning look over her shoulder as she walked out on the hall with Madi. 

Octavia chuckled. “Wow it’s like she forgot you were once Heda.”

Lexa rolled her eyes. “Believe me Octavia. No one has forgotten.”

Octavia smiled Back. The door opened and a woman walked in and kissed Octavia on the cheek. “Hey beautiful what are you doing today?”

“Just going to the sparring grounds with Lexa.” 

The woman turned toward Lexa. “So this is the famous Lexa.” She held out her hand. “I’m Niylah.”

Lexa looked the woman up and down. “So you’re the one that Clarke shared a bed with.”

Niylahs eyes widened. “Oh.”

Octavia chuckled. “She doesn’t hold back does she?”

The girl blushed. “That was a long time ago.” 

Lexa Sighed. And looked away annoyed. Niylah and Clarke was still a sore subject for the former commander. “Are we going or not Octavia?”

Octavia nodded and lead them. Indra and Niylah hung back. Octavia bumped her shoulder reading how tense the brunette was. “Hey.” She nudged her again. “Come on it was a long time ago.”

“I know.” She said sadly.

“Niylah is a good person. You will find that out for yourself.”

Lexa shrugged. “If you say so.”

“I do say so. I didn’t think I would ever love anyone again after Lincoln. She was there for me and she was patient. It took a while for me to open up again.” Octavia looked over her shoulder and smiled at Niylah who smiled back. “Im glad I did.” 

Lexa looked over her shoulder to the former trader. She huffed in frustration. “I’m sorry Octavia it will take me some time to not want to hurt her just by looking at her.”

Octavia chuckled again. “I used to feel that way every time Niylah mentioned Clarke’s name but I got over it. They are friends and it was a long time ago, shit was going down. I get it now and in due time you will too.”

“Do not expect me to like her.”

Octavia threw her arm around Lexa’s shoulder. “Dont expect me not to defend her when you’re being a bitch.”

Lexa scoffed. “I hope not with your fighting skills. She will surely get hurt.” 

Octavia got Lexa in headlock and Lexa punched Octavia in the stomach. They were both wrestling rolling around on the ground. ”I won that fight! Admit it!”

“I won’t lie!” Lexa laughed

Indra hovered above them. “Stop you fools before Wanheda finds out.”

Niylah pulled Octavia back. “Yes I agree with Indra. Are you crazy?”

“Yes.” They both shrugged and continued there way to the sparring grounds.

....................

Clarke was about to walk into a meeting with the ambassadors. Bellamy was to make a presentation about the school. Before she went in she pulled Madi aside. 

“Mads I have to ask something of you.”

She smiled and stood up straight. “What ever it is I can help Clarke.”

Clarke smiled. “I’m sure you can. Look people don’t know your your mother’s daughter yet and I’d like to keep it that way for a while which means you can’t talk about what you have seen outside of Polis. Cause if you do they will figure it out.”

“So it’s another secret we share!”

“Sha.”

She shrugged. “Ok can I boss some people around.”

Clarke chuckled. “Sure I don’t like the broadleaf Ambassador so you can boss him around a bit.”

“Yes!”

.......................

Clarke had introduced everyone to Madi as her second. They all noddded in acceptance. Madi stood at attention next to Clarke the entire meeting. She reminded her so much of Lexa. “Trunk kom broadleaf.” Madi said loudly making everyone stop suddenly.

“Yes child.”

“My name is Madi not child you will address me as so.”

He looked at Clarke shocked. “Wanheda?”

“My second has spoken.” She said firmly. forcing her face to remain stoic. Bellamy the same.

“My apologies.” He bowed. “Madi kom trikru.”

“You are forgiven Ambassador.” She bowed slightly. Clarke looked on proudly. “Now Ambassador can you explain why you have not had any input?”

“I don’t understand?” He frowned.

“Bellamy kom Skaikru has spent the last hour or so now explaining what new innovations would be happening in regards to the new school being built and everyone at this table.” She waved around the room. “Has had input. That is everyone but you?”

“My apol-.”

“No need to apologise Ambassador but since you have no input you will serve everyone there drinks and food.”

He stood there wide eyed and looked at Clarke. “Wanheda?”

“Sha?”

“I am not a servent.”

Madi interrupted him. “No your not but since you are not acting like an Ambassador and you have nothing to add to the table. Serve us you will.”

Clarke nodded in his direction. “My apologies, Wanheda, Madi, next time I assure you I will bring more to the table. For now I will serve you all.” He bowed. 

Clarke winked at Madi and continued with the meeting. 

..................

When everyone left the room Madi and Clarke started laughing uncontrollably. Clarke stopped and hugged the girl. “You will make a fine leader one day Mads.”

“Mochof. I’m going to find Nomon!”

“Ok.”

“I love you Clarke.”

Clarke froze and looked down to the girl who was smiling from ear to ear. “I love you too Mads.”

“And you love my Nomon.” Clarke went to argue. “It’s ok Clarke you don’t have to say it but I know and she loves you to you know.” She stepped back and ran out the room. “Bye Clarke.”

Clarke smiled watching the little girl run out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realise after posting this chapter that some people may be upset with the Bellamy offering up his sperm thing. Again I just want to point out that this version of Bellamy is different from the show just like in most on my fics. Anyways, I thought it was a pretty funny scene to write honestly and nothing was ever going to come of it. In my other fic when Clarke and Lexa have kids it’s because of Abby being able to scientifically make it happen but I thought with this fic I’d make it a little more realistic. I’d happily write Bellamy being a sperm doner I think it would leave the story open to a lot of funny incidents. But look I’ll leave it up to you guys. Just be respectful.


	18. Chapter 18

Clarke walked into the ship that had bought her down. “Charmaine!”

Charmaine looked st her amused sitting in the drivers seat. “Yes.”

“I’m getting tired of this shit! Every day there is an issue with your people.”

“There your people too Wanheda.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “I know.” She sighed. 

“You know that most of these prisoners are in here for small crimes. Like theft of not paying a fine.”

“Yes I know this! But they are becoming a problem.”

Charmaine stood from her seat quickly. “Maybe that’s because you don’t care about them now that we are on the ground!”

“That’s not true. I’m busy trying to rebuild Polis!”

“Yeah That And I’m sure your girlfriend has nothing to do with your time.” She rolled her eyes. “Do you know why I allowed you to become captain of MY ship Clarke? Because I thought that you would give a shit about us, when these people were imprisoned their names were drawn from a hat! Bought onto this ship without their consent and then had to live here as slaves mining for minerals cause our government didn’t want to risk putting people up there that they thought mattered!” She huffed. “Then we take over and we’re accidentally put on hypersleep wake up and find that the world had been wiped out!” She walked up to Clarke’s face. “I LET you become captain because I thought you would help these people but all you have been doing is helping the people from the bunker!”

Clarke ran her hands through her her. “Charmaine. It’s not that I don’t want to help them, it’s that I don’t know how.”

“Then figure it out Clarke. These people deserve a home too.”

Charmaine walked away but Clarke held her elbow and turned her back. “You’re right.” She said softly. “I’ll figure it out. You have my word.”

Charmaine nodded. “Those three men you killed...I know they deserved it. They were the worst ones on this ship but it scared the rest of the people.”

Clarke nodded. “Ok. I’ll fix this I’ll figure it out ok.”

......................................

Clarke was sitting in the throne room with Octavia in Indra. “Clarke I don’t give a shit about the prisoners.”

“I know you don’t but I do.”

“That’s not my problem. My responsibility lies to those who were In that bunker. You have no idea what we have all been through.”

“Then tell me Octavia.” She said softly.

Indra squeezed her shoulder and nodded at her. “There was not enough food and too many people.”

Indra sighed. “The clans were fighting each believing that they had more right to the bunker.”

Octavia continued. “I spoke to Jaha.”

Clarke sighed and looked away from them. “So basically anyone who did the tiniest thing was killed?”

“There was an arena and if you were accused then you had to fight for your life.”

Clarke pinched the bridge of her nose. “Octavia..”

“What else was I suppose to do Clarke!”

Clarke sighed. “I don’t know. I honestly don’t.”

Indra nodded. “Octavia did what she had to Clarke. It’s that simple. As far as we are concerned we have earned the right to call Polis our home.”

“Listen.” She said softly. “I get it, I really do but you changed when the doors opened right? Blood must not have blood was implemented.”

“Yeah cause we don’t need to live like that anymore.”

“Exactly!” She hit the table. “Exactly. You are thinking like the prisoners are you enemy, like they are a threat to you. From what Lexa has told me and from what Raven has showed me through satellite there is still plenty of land left. There is no need to fight over it. Fighting over who earned it more or who was here first, is pointless. Those prisoners were just like us Octavia they were arrested and taken away from there homes and the people that they love. The worst crime that a person committed on that ship was theft. Her name is Rebecca and she stole to feed her starving kids which no longer exists anymore. She didn’t even get to say good bye. She literally taken from earth put on a ship to become a slave for the government at the time accidentally put in hyper sleep woke up and everyone she loved ceased to exist and yet she still wants to go on she still wants to live. So many people on that ship are like that. They are just as strong as us, they deserve a chance to have a life here and I will admit that I have been too busy trying to rebuild Polis and not thinking about them which is why I believe they have been acting out by stealing and causing fights.”

Octavia lent back in her chair and sighed. “What’s Lexa’s opinon on the matter?”

“Octavia, she isn’t in charge anymore.”

Indra nodded. “We know Wanheda but her opinion is still important.”

“Yeah I mean.” Octavia huffed. “She’s had to deal with this before when we landed.”

“I really don’t want to-“

“Listen princess, I’ll see what Lexa’s says then I’ll make a decision.”

Clarke huffed. It was better then nothing. “Fine. I’ll go look for her now wait here.”

......................

Lexa was at the school with Bellamy. They were both going through the ages of the children that would be attending. There was fifty kids. There was no children under the ages of five, Bellamy told Lexa that the bunker had a restriction on reproducing. Thirty-five kids were ages between twelve and fifteen and fifteen kids between sixteen and seventeen. Jay jay was the youngest. “How do we do this Lexa?”

“Well.” She rubbed her chin. “I think the older children should only come to school a couple of times a week the rest of their time perhaps spent as an second?”

“An apprentice?”

“Yes.”

“That’s excellent! Do you think jay jay will be able to fit in with the others?”

“Definitely.” She nodded. “You can give him different learning material then the others.”

“True and then as more children are reproduced we can start looking at starting a younger group.”

“Sha.”

“I think six is a good age to start.”

“Yes. Although me and Murphy have been teaching Madi and jay jay quite young.”

“Murphy teaching? Really?”

Lexa smiled proudly. “There is so much you don’t know about him Bellamy.” She looked down to the papers in front of her. “You and Clarke are so worried about people becoming healers and engineers that you have forgotten about the people who make a city run?”

“Who.” He frowned.

“Farmers, cooks, cleaners ect.”

“Oh.” He scratched his head. “I never thought of that.”

“Yes I have noticed.”

“Sorry if I offended you Lexa.”

“It is ok.” She sighed. “My father was a farmer.” She smiled. “The best in trikru.”

“Wow really? For some reason I pictured your parents as warriors, what did your mother do?”

“She was a hunter. What about yours?”

“Oh.” He looked away sadly. “Ah it was hard up there ya know. I didn’t know my father. My mother was a a seamstress but had to do other things to make sure that we were aware of surprise inspections so she wasn’t floated for having Octavia and Octavia wasn’t floated for being born.”

Lexa held his shoulder. “What other things?”

He looked at her sadly. “Prostitution.” 

She frowned. “She must have really loved you and your sister.”

“She did, she really did. I helped raise her you know. It hurts so much that I failed her. I was suppose to protect her. I thought that she may have forgiven me by now, some days she can’t even look at me.” He looked down to the desk.

Lexa bowed to look him in the eyes. “Maybe She will never forgive you but I don’t think you would ever stop trying to earn it.”

He smiled. “I will never give up.”

“Yes.” She nudged him. “You are annoyingly persistent.” He chuckled. “So you Mother was a seamstress? Without her people would walk around nude. Do you see what I am saying Bellamy. It takes more then doctors and engineers to run a population.”

He nodded. “You’re right, I will go over everything again.”

“Good.”

“Lexa?” The both heard. 

Lexa smiled. “In here Clarke!”

Clarke came into the classroom. “There you are.” She smiled. The blonde made her way to Lexa and bent down and kissed her softly on the lips.

Bellamy chuckled. “Hi Bellamy how are you? How’s your day been?” He said sarcastically.

Clarke rolled her eyes and pushed his face away. “Go away Bell.”

“Rude.” He laughed and pointed at her as he was getting up to leave. “This is why YOU didn’t get a friendship bracelet.” He looked at Lexa. “I’ll think about what you said. Ok Lexa?”

“Sha.” 

Clarke looked at Lexa and bent down and kissed her again. “Hi.” She smiled.

“Hello Klark.”

Clarke sat on the edge of the desk and held Lexa’s hand. “I need your help.”

“Of course. Anything.”

“Octavia and Indra want your opinion on some matters.”

“Ok.” She smiled. 

Clarke smiled back and looked around the room. “Things coming along nicely here?”

“Yes. Bellamy thinks I should consider teaching.”

“How do you feel about that?”

“I do not think that is for me.”

Clarke bent down and kissed her again. “You will figure it out.”

“What if I don’t?”

Clarke pulled her up so the brunette was standing between her legs. She rested her hands on her hips while lexa wrapped her arms around the blondes shoulders. “You will.” She smiled. “But if you don’t then you can be an advisor you basically already are.”

“This is true.” She lent forward and kissed her and ran her hand through her blonde hair.

“Mmm.” Clarke sighed resting her forehead against the brunettes. “I hate to cut this short but Indra and Octavia are waiting.”

Lexa nodded. “Ok.”

..............

Lexa listened intently to what both Octavia and Clarke were saying. She sighed when they finished. “Well what do you think should happen Lexa?” Asked Octavia.

“Hmmm.” She sighed. “I think that the one mistake that I made when I was Commander was assuming that Skaikru wanted war. If I could go back in time I would have handled things differently.”

Clarke held her hand under the table. “How so?”

“I would have done a better job at making sure you all meant no harm. In this case we know this to be true. The three most dangerous prisoners were killed the rest are harmless.”

Octavia scoffed. “Says the princess.” 

Clarke glared at her before she could say something Lexa cut in.

“Have you actually meant these prisoners?”

“No.” Indra shook her head. 

“So maybe that should be your next priority Octavia.” 

“Then what?”

Lexa looked at Clarke apologetically. “I mean no disrespect Clarke but I think you are too concerned with nurses and doctors and teachers that you are not thinking of the. Ahh.”

“Little man.” Octavia added. 

“Yes.” She felt Clarke try to pull away her hand but Lexa held on firmly. “Just listen, I was just talking to Bellamy about this very issue.” Looked at the three of them. “If I could go back in time I would use Skaikru abilities and integrate them in society. That would be my advice about the Eligius crew.”

Octavia sighed. “And this is what you would do Lexa?”

“Sha.”

She looked at Indra who nodded at her. “Ok. I’ll meet the people but if I think they are a threat Clarke, we are going to have a problem.”

Clarke glared at her. “Yes. That problem would be me.”

Octavia huffed. “Whatever princess.” She looked back at Lexa. “Wanna meet at the sparring grounds later?”

Before Lexa could answer Clarke cut in. “Actually I was wondering if you and Madi would like to do something later?”

Octavia huffed. “Of course you do?”

Clarke frowned at her. “What are you talking about?”

Octavia rolled her eyes and stood up. “Come Indra. Let’s go train the warriors.”

Indra nodded and stood but Clarke wasn’t letting Octavia leave without knowing what she meant. “If you have something to say just say it.”

Octavia turned and rolled her eyes. “I don’t have time.” She shrugged. “Lexa when you finished being bossed around from the princess come find me.”

Clarke stood abruptly from her chair. “Float you!”

Lexa stood up with her and held her around the waist. “Octavia.” She said calmly. “Leave. I’ll come find you later.”

She rolled her eyes. “Fine.”

Indra walked up beside her and hit her upside the back of her head. 

Lexa turned Clarke around. “I do NOT boss you around!”

Lexa chuckled. “I know.”

Clarke cupped her neck gently rubbing the brunettes jaw. “I’m sorry if it seems that way.”

Lexa pulled her closer and kissed her gently. “Clarke.” She smiled. “You are by nature very bossy.” Clarke went to argue. “But not with me.”

Clarke sighed. “Good. Will you let me know if I am?.”

“Sha.”

Clarke hugged her close and kissed her neck. “Why did she say that then?”

Lexa pulled her back gently. “I have not known Octavia very long but I have come to realise that when she does not get her own way she acts like that.”

“I suppose.” She kissed her again. “So as I was saying before Octavia pissed me off. Would you and Madi like to join me for dinner tonight. Just the three of us.”

“Yes.” 

Clarke smiled and pushed her against the table. She ran her hand up Lexa’s shirt and gently caressed her abs. “Mmm.” She moaned as she pushed her tongue into Lexa’s mouth. “You are a good kisser Heda.” She smirked as she planted little kisses along Lexa’s jaw.

Lexa blushed. “I am glad.”

Clarke laughed. “You’re not very good at receiving compliments.”

She shrugged. “It’s a strange compliment. It was like that compliment you gave me the other day.”

Clarke smiled amused. “Oh yeah what did I say.” 

“That I was nice and warm.” Lexa raised her eyebrow.

Clarke threw back her head and laughed. She shook her head and ran her hand through Lexa’s brown curls. “I think I could compliment you all day about anything really.”

“Yes I know. Yesterday when we were sitting on the balcony you were telling me how soft my hair is, which again is another strange compliment.”

Clarke ran her hand through Lexa’s curls. “It is though.” She lent forward and smelt it. “And it smells nice.” She kissed her lightly on her neck. “So compliments aside. What are you doing now?”

“I am going to go meet up with Raven and Madi and get some tech lessons. You?”

“I’m going to go speak to Charmaine.” Clarke kissed her again. “I’ll see you tonight?”

“Yes.”

...........................

Lexa stood by echo near the training pits watching as Octavia was teaching a young boy moves. When Octavia looked up and noticed Lexa she made her way over. Lexa looked at Echo. “Can you give us a moment?”

Echo nodded and picked up a staff to go train. Octavia huffed when she stood in front of Lexa. “I’m not sorry.” She shrugged and looked away. When Lexa didn’t respond she huffed again and looked at her. “I may be a tiny bit sorry.” Still Lexa didn’t answer. “Ugh” She throw her hands up. “Fine I’m sorry ok are you happy?”

“I’m not the one you should apologise too.” Lexa cocked her eyebrow.

Octavia scoffed and crossed her arms. “Not happening. Lexa shrugged then went to walk away. “Wait.” She growled. “This is bullshit.”

“What is? Me wanting you to apologise to someone you were out of line to?”

“Every time I want to do something with you Clarke just so happens to at the exact same moment want to do something with you as well!”

“That is not true Octavia.”

“Look I wouldn’t care if it was anyone else! other then Niylah, you are my only friend and Clarke acts like you belong to her!”

Lexa Sighed and moved towards Octavia. She gently held her arm. “I am your friend Octavia kom Skaikru and as your friend I would never treat someone you care about the way you treat Clarke. I can’t stand Niylah at the moment but I’d never disrespect her the way you do Clarke. This isn’t just about me being your friend or you feeling that Clarke thinks I belong to her. There is more to this and you need to figure it out.”

“Ok how about this.” She sighed. “I will try my hardest to figure it out and I promise I will try not to disrespect Clarke in the meantime.”

Lexa thought about it then nodded. “I can accept this.”

Octavia smiled. “Good. Now come on there are some warriors I want you to meet.

................................

Lexa and Madi held hands walking to Clarke’s room. That’s where she said to meet her for dinner. When they both walked in Clarke had a table set up with candles in the middle and a feast. She smiled as they both entered. Madi ran to her and threw her arms around the blondes waist. “Clarke! I missed you today!”

Clarke smiled and kissed the top of her head. “I missed you too goufa. I’m sorry I was busy but I will make time for you tomorrow?”

“Can we go to our secret place tomorrow morning?”

“Yes. Now go sit at the table I want to kiss your Nomon.”

Madi’s face crindgd. “Eww.” She said as she ran away.

Lexa chuckled. “Yes Clarke Eww.”

“You love it.” She smiled and kissed her gently on the lips. “Did you have a nice day?”

“Sha. I had a talk to Octavia she said she would try not to be rude.”

“Lexa you didn’t have to do that I can fight my own battles.”

“I know.” She smiled. “You have a lot going on right now and it was unnecessary.”

“Don’t know what her problem is.” She sighed. “But enough about that come on.” She tugged her hands. “Look.” She said waving at all the food. “I helped Murphy male it’s.”

“That’s nice Clarke.”

“Yeah it was fun but really not my thing. He kicked me out of the kitchen quite a bit.”

Madi giggled. “Uncle Murphy is funny. What was it he said about Clarke Nomon?”

“Nothing Madi.”

“Yeah he said that Clarke can’t cook cause she has a princess crown stuck so far up her-“

“Ok.” Lexa covered the girls mouth. “I think Clarke understands.”

“Yes I understand the next time I see Murphy I’m going to kick his ass.”

Maid giggled. “He also said you can’t fight cause-“

“Alright!” Lexa said again covering her mouth. “Clarke dinner looks wonderful.”

Clarke sat down next to them and frowned. “You know I can fight right Lexa?”

“Sha. I have no doubt.”

“Such an asshole.” She muttered.

Lexa ran her hands through the back of Clarke’s hair and tugged playfully so she would look at her. “Murphy is all bark and no bite Clarke. He doesn’t mean half of the things he says.”

She smiled and kissed the brunette. “I’m still going to challenge him.” She shrugged. “Ok let’s eat.”

Lexa shook her head and smiled. 

........................

Clarke was sitting on her chair with Madi asleep on her lap. She had fallen also while Clarke read to her. She kissed the top of her head smiling at the girl. Lexa was sitting next to her watching in awe. “Lexa?” She said quietly.

“Sha.”

“I don’t want you to have babies with Bellamy.”

“Ok.” She smiled.

“Ok?”

“Sha.” She cupped the blondes cheek. “I would like more children one day though.”

“Ok”

“Ok?”

Clarke smiled and kissed inside of Lexa’s hand. “Come on let’s get this goufa to bed.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I took in what everyone was saying ;)


	19. Chapter 19

Lexa was walking through Polis by herself as Clarke had duties to attend to this morning. She felt like a big chip had been removed off her shoulder after talking to Clarke. She didn’t know what her role would be but she knew her place was here in Polis. She still felt loss but holding the blonde in her arms every night made her feel at home. It had been two weeks since that day. Rebel is a healthy baby girl keeping Emori and Murphy on their toes of course Lexa offers to help and enjoys one on one time with the baby. Clarke has been busy these last two weeks but always makes time for herself and Madi, infact Madi has been attached to Clarke’s hip. 

In between time spent with Clarke and Madi Lexa has spent her time with the Blakes and others. 

Bellamy likes to spend quiet time with her just reading and talking about books and history and also the school. He suggested she have a place in the school as a teacher but Lexa declined, it didn’t seem that appealing to her. He was a bit disappointed but understood. 

Her time with Octavia was often at the sparring grounds, warriors would often ask to spar but she always declined knowing how much it upset Clarke when she got hurt the last time but she was happy to help with their form. Octavia suggested that she become a trainer and Lexa admitted that that did seem very appealing and promised Octavia she would think about it. 

She had visited Raven in her workshop with Madi and asked if she could sit in on lessons the mechanic was giving her daughter which Raven agreed to. She found what Raven did fascinating. 

_“Raven what your mind can do is beyond words. It’s incredible to say the least.”_

_Raven hit the bench and pointed at her. “You see! That’s what I have been telling everyone! YOU are my new best friend!”_

_“Oh... this is awkward Raven but I believe that Bellamy has already claimed that I am his best friend.”_

_“What!” She stood up from her bench. “Nuh uh. Fuck that!” And stormed out the room to which she assumed was Bellamy’s way._

_Madi giggled. “She’s strange isn’t she nomon.”_

_“Sha.”_

She found herself in the company of echo a lot as well. They would both walk through Polis and always ended at the sparring pits watching on. 

_On this one particular day she watched as Octavia and Clarke were ordering around Warriors. Echo laughed. “It’s funny how life works out huh?”_

_“What do you mean?”_

_“Here I sit with the former Heda. Trikru at that, watching our two leaders, both Skaikru ordering around warriors from all clans” She chuckled. “Who would have thought that a spy from Azgeda and could befriend a trikru Commander.”_

_Lexa smiled. It was indeed strange how life had worked out. She shrugged. “I like it.”_

_Echo turned to her. “Me too.”_

She has greatly enjoyed getting to know and make new friends but what surprised her the most was that Abby also wanted to spend time with her. So Lexa being the curious person she is asked her about it. 

_“Why do you want to spend time with me?”_

_Abby smirked. “I think it’s important to get to know the person who shares a bed with my daughter. Don’t you?”_

Even though it had been two weeks Lexa and Clarke still haven’t been intimate, they shared kisses and held each other a lot but they simply haven’t found the time and Lexa hated to admit it but she was nervous. It had been so long. 

_Lexa blushed and nodded and decided never to bring it up again, So she helped Abby around the clinic with stock and with patients while listening to Abby tell her stories of Clarke as a child and of Jake, Clarke’s father._

_“This one time.” Abby laughed. “Clarke was 15 and she had over a friend what was her name...oh right” she clicked her fingers. “Stacey, her name was Stacey. Anyway she invited Stacey over to study and I was playing a game with Jake and we both realised that we hadn’t heard from the girls in hours. So Jake decided he would go ask the girls if they wanted something to eat.” She laughed again. “And all I hear is Jake running out of the room screaming ‘abs my eyes! My eyes! I’ve gone blind Abby help.’ So I panicked and I ran up to him and I see Clarke stumble out of her room in her bra struggling to get her top on while Stacey ran out of the room red faced” Abby snickered. “When Clarke finally got her shirt on and stood with her hands on her hips and said ‘well that was embarrassing’ then Jake turned to Clarke with his eyes still covered mind you and smirked and said ‘you should be embarrassed I was thirteen when I go to first base. Bit of a late bloomer we have here abs.’’ Abby and Lexa laughed at the memory._

_“And what did Clarke say to that?”_

_“She just shook her head and went after Stacey as she was leaving though Jake asked her what lesson she learnt and Clarke responded with. ‘Always lock my door.’ ”_

_“He sounded like a great man Abby”_

_“Oh he was.” She smiled sadly. “Clarke is a lot like him. He was too smart for his own good and had a very cheeky side which I’m sure you have seen in Clarke.”_

_“Yes.”_

_“He also had a big heart. Now that I think of it, I don’t think Clarke got any of my attributes.”_

_“You’re wrong Abby. She gets her strength fro you.” Abby smiled and hugged Lexa. She was thrown at first but hugged her back._

Abby suggested she work in the clinic but Lexa declined. The work of a healer is not for her.

She also spent time with Marcus Kane. They talked about Polis and he was curious to get her opinion on a lot of subjects. 

_He was still a peaceful man and very insightful. “You look lost Lexa.”_

_“Mm.” She said leaning back on her chair. “I am just trying to find my place here.”_

_He lent forward on his desk. “You will figure it out in due time I’m sure.” He smiled kindly. “You have all the time in the world to figure it out.”_

So as she walks through Polis admiring the huts that have been built she realised that she still hasn’t found her place but nevertheless she’s quite happy to take her time. She smiled as she walked past Echo and Raven bickering about something I’m sure wasn’t important. They both seen her and waved. Raven stomped her way over to her and held her by the shoulders. “Lexa! I need to ask you to do something.”

“Very well.”

Echo walked up behind Raven. “Hei Leksa.”

“Echo.” She smiled.

Raven rolled her eyes. “Ok so Clarke wants to set up a festival right and I want to make fireworks-“

“The exploding lights you were telling me about.”

“Yes! But Echo is on my back about it! She says it’s dangerous and Clarke will be mad and blah blah blah.....can you tell her how awesome I am?.”

She looked over Raven’s shoulder and seen Echo shaking her head. “Well.” Lexa Said. “While I do think your mind Is incredible and I have no doubt that you would be able to make these ahh fireworks I think you should ask Clarke if you can practice away from Polis first.”

Raven squinted her eyes. “Alright I will but if you weren’t my best friend....” Lexa went to argue. “Fuck Bellamy! You are not his best friend.” She huffed and walked away.

Echo smiled. “Thanks.” She walked off after the mechanic. 

Lexa made her way to the clearing where the rover was parked and sat herself upon it looking over Polis. It was so much more lively then the last time her and Murphy were here just nearly 4 months ago. She heard a rustle in the bushes and quickly jumped off the car to turn towards the noise. 

A woman the same age as Lexa walked out from the bushes and smiled. 

“Lexa kom trikru.”

“Trishana?” Lexa said in awe.

“Sha. It has been long Lexa.” Trishana walked forward and grabbed Lexa’s arm in the warrior handshake. “It is good to see you?”

“You too old friend. I don’t mean to sound rude but what are you doing sneaking up on me”

“My apologies Lexa But ever since I heard of your return I have tried to seek you out but you have either been absent or busy with wanheda, I felt that this was the only way.”

Lexa nodded in acceptance. “Very well.” Lexa looked at the pin on Trishanas shirt. It was the Symbol of the trikru Ambassador. She frowned as the last trikru Ambassador was an old friend as well. Trikana kom trikru, Trishanas mother. “You are Ambassador?”

“Sha.”

“Trikana?”

The woman looked away sadly. “Dead.”

“I’m so sorry Trishana.”

“Not your fault Lexa. This is what I have come to discuss with you today.”

“About your mother?”

“No lexa. The ambassadors want you back. It’s your birthright.”

“Chit! What about Octavia? ”

Trishana sighed. “Octavia has done well, this is true but she is not a nightblood and she is not you. You are the only nightblood left on earth Lexa.”

Lexa thought of Madi but didn’t bring her up. “You should all be loyal to your Queen!” She hissed.

Trishana laughed. “Octavia is not the one keeping the coalition toghter. It is wanheda.”

“Then What is the issue!”

“We were all fine having Wanheda lead and Octavia sitting on the throne But then we found out you were alive there is no need for her to be Heda anymore. She was going to stay Heda until nightblood children were old enough to take her place but there hasn’t been any born in the last 6 years. The coalition do not want her on the throne Lexa, not unless there is nightblood children that will one day take her place.”

“Where are you loyalties! Octavia is a fine Commander!”

“My loyalties!” Trishana laughed bitterly. “Echo kom Azgeda killed my mother in cold blood to make Azgeda take over the coalition, and I have to look at her every single day walking around the tower like she is someone of importance! She killed my mother! Your friend!”

“That is in the past Trishana!”

“I don’t care! Octavia’s time is running out Lexa. Once again your the only one who can save the coalition.”

.....................

Lexa returned to the tower and asked Clarke, Octavia, Indra, Bellamy, Raven and Echo to meet in the throne room. Octavia was red faced pacing the throne room while Clarke looked out the balcony with disappointment written across her face. Indra was watching her second and Lexa could see the care in her eyes even though she knew that Indra would never admit it. Raven was sitting next to Echo holding her hand as Echo looked to the floor, guilt eating her alive and Bellamy was shaking his head.

“Six years.” Octavia said bitterly. “Six damn years I have been loyal!”

Lexa sighed. “Octavia you can not take this personally.”

Octavia stopped and glared at Lexa. “Are you fucking kidding me!” 

Clarke walked towards Octavia. “She’s right.”

Octavia huffed. “Of course you would agree with your girlfriend. You ALWAYS did princess.”

Lexa watched as Clarke blushed, she would have smiled if not for the situation. “I don’t know what you remember Octavia but when I was Heda all Clarke did was disagree with me.”

Clarke smirked. “Not all the time.”

Octavia groaned. “Can you two go be disgusting somewhere else! What the hell are we gonna do!”

Echo stood. “I’m sorry this is my fault.”

Bellamy shook his head. “No it’s not Echo.”

“I killed that woman’s mother.”

Raven held her hand. “That was a different time babe. Either way this has nothing to do with that?”

Bellamy nodded. “She’s right.”

Octavia stopped and took a deep breath. Indra was by her side. “Look, me and Indra have worked to damn hard to watch the coalition crumbled. So I’ll step down Lexa and you can become Heda.”

Clarke shook her head. “No that’s not what she wants.”

“Well fuck Clarke what else are we suppose to do! It’s not like I can produce nightblood children-“ Octavia stopped. “Wait.”

“No.” Lexa said firmly.

“Madi is the only night blood child Lexa!”

“I don’t care she won’t be a pawn in Polis politics!”

“It’s her birthright!” Octavia hissed. 

Lexa walked towards Octavia. “Do not dare tell me of my child’s rights Octavia!”

The whole room burst with arguments. Indra and Octavia arguing that Madi should be trained while Echo, Raven and Bellamy argued that she was just a child but what confused Lexa was that Clarke wasn’t saying anything. She was frowning and looking out the window. Lexa knew that look. It was the same look she always use to get. It was the look that means she was going to argue with her. 

“Enough!” The brunette yelled. Everyone in the room went quiet and looked at the former commander. But Lexa only had eyes for Clarke. “Clarke?”

Clarke looked at her sadly. “Yes?”

“Do you agree with Indra and Octavia?”

Clarke sighed. “In a way yes.”

Lexa grit her teeth to hold back her tears. 

Bellamy yelled. “What the actual fuck Clarke!”

But Clarke ignored him and was watching Lexa. She could see the hurt in her eyes. “Lexa just listen and let me explain.”

“You lied.” Lexa said plainly

“What?”

“You lied. You said my family would be safe if we came here.”

“You are all safe. I didn’t lie. I have never lied to you. Just listen-“

“No.” Lexa shook her head. “No. My daughter will not become a pawn in your political games!”

Clarke stepped back. “I would never-“

“Hey!” Raven clapped. “Maybe we should leave Clarke and Lexa to talk.” She looked around the room. 

Lexa huffed. “No I’m done here.” She said looking at Clarke.

“What?” Clarke said softly

“Done.” Lexa said leaving the room and slamming the door. 

As Lexa rounded the corner she heard the doors slam open and feet running towards her. 

Clarke jumped in front of Lexa and put her hands on her shoulders to stop her from walking. “How could you think I would use Madi like that!”

“What else am I suppose to think Klark!”

“Your suppose to trust me!”

“You want my child to become a noviciate!”

“You didn’t hear what I had to say so don’t assume!”

“You said you cared about us!”

“I do!”

“But You’re Fine to put leadership burdens on an eleven year old girl!”

“I didn’t say that!”

“This was a mistake! I should have known that this was too good to be true! We should have never came back! Yet again because I blindly believe the things you say! And now my daughters life could be in danger and it’s all your fault!”

Both Clarke and Lexa were trying to catch their breaths. Lexa looked angry while Clarke looked like someone just ripped out her heart. 

Lexas expression softened looking at the blonde but before she could say something Clarke stepped forward into Lexa’s space. “Then leave.” She said. her voice cracking. And moved past the brunette. Lexa turned and watched her walk away. She realised that Bellamy and Raven were watching the whole time. The quickly followed Clarke trying to get her to stop and talk but with no use. 

Lexa walked to her room and slammed the door. She didn’t mean what she said to Clarke but she was just so angry. 

.....................

Clarke sat on top of the Polis tower. She watched as the sun started to set. She had been up there for hours crying. Words couldn’t describe the pain she felt. Lexa didn’t trust her and she thought she would hurt Madi. Her heart hurt. Her head hurt. Her body ached. In the time she was sitting up on the tower she made a decision. She decided to let Lexa and Madi go as much as it made her want to crawl up in a ball in die. 

She heard the door open, She quickly wiped her face to hide her tears.

Madi came bounding over to her. “Clarke!” She said happily. “Everyone has been looking for you! But I knew where you were.” The girl giggled and sat down beside her. Clarke didn’t speak she just looked out at the horizon. She felt a small hand touch her face. “You’re sad.” Madi said softly.

“Sha.”

Madi held her hand. “I can fix you!”

Clarke laughed bitterly. “No one can fix me goufa.”

“Come on Clarke.” Madi said kneeling in front of her. “Let’s go do something. It will make you smile!”

Clarke smiled sadly at the girl. “Madi.” She sighed. “I’m going to be busy for a while.”

“How long? I can wait.” She said happily.

Clarke looked away. “I don’t know.”

“Well there is always tomorrow right Clarke?”

Clarke cupped Madi’s face, she smiled adoringly at the girl. She felt so glad that she got to meet her. She was special just like Lexa. “No Madi I will be busy for quite some time.”

Madi frowned. “Did I do something?”

Clarke pulled Madi into her lap and held her tight. “Never.” She kissed the top of her head. “Your perfect.”

“You said if we move here we could see each other all the time.”

“Sha But something has come up.”

“Will you see Nomon?”

“No.” She said softly.

“Jay jay?”

“No.”

“Murphy, Emori and the baby?”

“No goufa. No one.”

“No one!”

“Sha.” Clark swallowed the lump in her throat.

“Clarke.” Madi pouted. “Why?”

Clarke held Madi tight again. “I have done some bad things Mads and I think this is all I get now. I have to rule Polis and do it alone.”

“No one should be alone Clarke.” Madi sobbed. Clarke kissed the top of her head but Madi jumped up making Clarke stand up as well. “You said you cared about us.”

“Mads?”

“Do you care about us Clarke?”

Clarke looked at the sad face of the girl. She could feel a pain in her chest but she couldn’t listen to the pain she had to ignore it. She had to respect Lexa’s wishes.

“I will make sure you get the best education and best medical care.” 

“Do. You. Care about us!”

Clarke shook her head and lied. “No.” She said so softly it sounded like a whisper.

Madi looked like someone slapped her. Clarke walked towards her but Madi ran out the doors. Clarke slumped onto the floor crying. It was for the best she thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Take a deep breath. Everything will be ok.


	20. Chapter 20

Clarke had distance herself from everyone. She even had everyone moved to the level below hers. From what her guards told her none of them were happy about it. 

Raven and Bellamy have tried to talk to her numerous times but she always made sure she had things to do to keep her to occupied. 

She seen Lexa at a distance more then once. She looked sad but Clarke pushed that aside. This is what Lexa wants. She seen Madi too, she looked hurt and lost. It broke Clarke’s heart that she was the one to cause that but Clarke held her chin up high because she believe that she is giving Lexa and Madi a life free of burdens. 

So here she is in the prisoner ship again this week. With Octavia and Indra standing in front of her. They had just finished talking to some of the prisoners. “So they are not a bunch of psychos.” 

Clarke rolled her eyes. She really wasn’t it the mood for Octavia’s bad attitude today. She had a headache from overthinking. She was exhausted from lack of sleeping and her heart felt like it had been ripped apart leaving her feeling nauseous all the time. “Just like I said...” 

Indra sighed. “And what do you suppose we do with these people Clarke?”

“Make them work.”

Octavia scoffed. “So they were slaves up in space and now they are slaves again here in the ground. Yeah princess they will really go for that.”

Clarke bit the inside of her cheek so she wouldn’t yell at Octavia. “No Octavia. Not slaves. Slaves work for nothing. These people would be working like the rest of the people from the bunker.” 

Octavia huffed. “What ever, you have my approval.” She waved her hand.

“I was going to do it without your approval anyway.”

Octavia glared. “I am the red queen. QUEEN.”

“Yeah?” She shrugged. “You will alway be the little girl hidden under the floorboards to me.”

Octavia got in her face but Indra pushed her back. “Now is not the time.”

“Name the time and the place.” Clarke hissed.

“What’s the matter princess did Lexa finally figure out that she was too good for you!”

Clarke tried to get past Indra but she was held back by a pair on arms. “Enough Clarke.” She heard Charmaine say behind her pulling her back. 

Clarke took a deep breath to calm down. She stormed off out of the ship running into someone and knocking them over. It was Rebecca. She was around Clarke’s age and had jet black hair. Her eyes were brown and she had a slim figure. Clarke helped her off the ground. “Sorry.” She said softly.

“Clarke.” Rebecca smiled. “It’s been a while.”

“Yeah.” She sighed. “Been busy.”

“I know, Polis is looking good.”

Clarke grinned. “Just good?”

“Well.” She shrugged. “I’m used to complete city’s with roads and stuff.”

“True. So how have you been.”

“You know.” She looked away sadly. “Some days are harder then the rest.” She sighed. “Miss my kids. Think about them all the time.”

Clarke nodded. Rebecca’s story was heartbreaking, Charmaine had shown her the video of the ship waking up from their hypersleep. She remembered seeing Rebecca screaming as she looked out the window to the earth.. “You know Rebecca I’m trying to find jobs for everyone and I think you would be great lending a hand in the school. It’s complete but still needs some help running it.”

She smiled. “Really?”

“Yes. Bellamy will love the extra hand and I think you would have a lot of good input.”

“Bellamy is your fiancé right?”

“Ah no not anymore.”

“Oh I’m sorry.”

Clarke chuckled. “Don’t be. We ended on good terms. It was mutual.”

“Right.” She smiled sadly. “Well I’m not good at teaching but I’m pretty good at knowing what kids need and I’m bored shitless.” She laughed. “It will keep my mind of things ya know.”

“Yeah of course.”

“I’ll go find him now then!”

...............

Clarke was lying on her bed staring at the ceiling. It was late at night and all she wanted was to hold Lexa and Madi. She wondered when they would be leaving Polis or if they actually would be leaving Polis. She hopes not. She got up when there was a knock on her door. She rolled her eyes only one person could get past her guards. “Fuck off Octavia!” 

She knocked again. “I can be here alllll night princess.” She said on the other side of the door.

Clarke groaned and got off her bed stomping her way to the door. She swung it open harshly. “What do you want?”

Octavia smirked and walked past her into her bedroom. “Just a friendly visit.”

“Get out.”

Octavia rolled her eyes. “Look.” She sighed. “I promised Lexa I would try not to be like that towards you. So here I am trying.”

Clarke slammed the door shut. She sighed. “I’m just going to ask you straight out Octavia and I want an honest answer.”

“Ok?” She frowned.

“Do you have feelings for Lexa?”

Octavia looked confused, then amused and laughed. “No.” She shook her head. “No I don’t.” She snapped. “I told you I love Niylah!”

“Well you know you act like a jealous ex girlfriend.”

Octavia sat on her bed. “Hmm. I also promised I would try to figure out what my problem is with you.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Well when you figure it out let me know.” she huffed. “Until then fuck off...” she waved towards the door.

She leaned back on the bed. “So angry princess. Wouldn’t happened to have anything to do with a hot brunette would it?”

“Get out Octavia.”

Octavia stood. “She’s too good for you.”

“I know.” She grit her teeth. “Now get out.”

She huffed. “You get everything handed to you.”

Clarke stared at her wide eyed. “You are joking right?”

“No I’m not.” She walked to Clarke. “You were born into wealth. You got handed your leadership. Christ even your dead girlfriend came back for you!”

Clarke stood back and shook her head. “I was born into privilege that I will admit and that I had no control over.” She sighed. “I didn’t get handed my leadership. It just happened. Lexa thinks I was born for this I’m starting to think she is right, I can’t not lead it’s not how I function but none of that matters because those two things are not what bothers you is it?” She walked into Octavia’s space. “Your angry cause I get Lexa back and you don’t get Lincoln.” Octavia’s eyes glistened. She turned her back to the blonde. “I don’t get everything handed to me Octavia. I’m going to die alone. So at least that will make you happy right?”

“You and Bellamy are the reason why he’s dead.”

“No.” Clarke said sadly. “Pike is the reason why Lincoln is dead.”

Octavia shook her head and turned to her. “No! If my damn brother hadn’t of slaughtered those people things would be different. If you had of come with me instead of staying in Polis then you could have helped!”

Clarke’s eyes watered. “Maybe.” She pulled out a blade and put it in Octavia’s hand. “Maybe you’re right.” She snarled. “So here Octavia. Here take your revenge.”

Octavia gripped the blade in her hand. “You think I won’t!”

“Get it over with then!”

Octavia shoved Clarke against the wall and held the blade to her throat. “I hate you.” She said in a low voice. “I hate that you get to be happy. I hate that you find this leadership shit so easy. I hate that you got to be with Niylah first! I hate that the only friend I have in Polis would rather be spending her time with you! I tried! I TRIED to forgive you. I tried to be your friend but every time I look at you or Bellamy it just reminds me that you’re BOTH here and Lincoln IS NOT!” She pushed the blade against Clarke’s neck till blood trickled out. “I fucking hate you Clarke Griffin.” Her voice cracked. “I fucking hate you.”

“Do it then.” Clarke said softly.

Octavia huffed and pushed off the blonde. “Lexa would never forgive me.” She placed the blade on the desk gently. “She means to much to me to lose over the likes of you.” She walked to the door. “She is too good for you. I meant that and you ignoring her for the past week just goes to prove my statement that you are a god damn coward Clarke Griffin.” She chuckled and looked over her shoulder. “I will be civil for Lexa’s sake but make no mistake.” She pulled the door open. “I wish you were dead.” She chuckled sadly. “Wow I figured out what my problem is with you. Thanks.” She said then left and slammed the door shut.

Clarke fell to the floor with tears running down her face. She had never felt more alone.

................................

Clarke was sitting in Charmaines office going over the people in the ship and what role they would play. So far she was impressed.

The older woman was leaning back on her chair and looking at Clarke like she was trying to figure her out. “What?” 

“Nothing.” She shrugged.

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Well stop staring at me.”

“I can’t.”

“Why?”

Charmaine pointed at her neck. “I’m just curious who you ALLOWED to too that to you.”

“Allowed?”

“Yes. As being the one who trained you in combat I say with the upmost certainty that no one would be able to get close enough to do that unless you allowed them to.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about so just shut up and get back to work.”

“Was it your girlfriend?”

“She’s not my girlfriend and if she was she would never hurt me.”

“Right well.” She scratched her chin. “Who was it then.”

Clarke sighed. They had a lot of work to get through and she knew Charmaine wouldn’t let it go till she told her. “Me and Octavia had another disagreement.”

“No.” She shook her head. “You let her do that to you.”

“So?”

“So?” Charmaine sat forward. “So? Really Clarke? You let someone hold a blade to you throat and all you can say is so? What the fuck!”

Clarke shrugged. “She had her reasons and I had mine.”

“For fuck sakes Clarke! What has gotten into you. You look like you haven’t slept, you have lost weight and your letting some pissy little bitch push you around!”

“Charmaine-“

“No I have only seen you like this a couple of times before. That was when the broody brunette left and after you accepted Bellamy’s proposal.” Charmaine stood and walked around the desk. She looked at Clarke sadly as she sat down in front of her. “Now I knew that guilt is why you acted like this when Bellamy proposed, I know that cause you told me. I understand why you were upset when the broody brunette left I figured it was the chick you were talking about while we were up there.” She pointed upwards to the sky. “But why? Why in the hell would you let the red queen bitch hold a blade to your neck?”

“Maybe I just don’t care anymore.” Her eyes watered.

“Clarke.” The older woman sighed. “Talk to me what is going on?”

Clarke wiped away the tears. “I’m still not good enough for them.” 

“Who? The broody brunette and the mini broody?”

Clarke chuckled through her tears. “Her name is Lexa and the girls name is madi.”

“Right.” She waved her off. “Why the hell aren’t you good enough. I’d bang you.” She shrugged.

Clarke rolled her eyes. “How flatteringly.”

Charmaine smirked. “I’m just having a hard time understanding this Clarke you have to help me out here. You are strong, honest, kind, fair and good looking at that so why aren’t you good enough for broody and her kid?”

Clarke stood. “Because of my burdens.”

“Being a leader?” 

“Yeah.”

“Clarke look I don’t know broody like you do but I know that chick loves you so does the kid, her eyes light up when ever she sees you. If they want to be with you and you have these burdens that is their choice.”

“Lexa doesn’t trust me.”

“So? Earn it.” She shrugged.

“It’s not that simple. She doesn’t trust me with Madi.”

“Ok.” She Frowned. “So.....Earn it....you have been apart for six years you are only starting to know Madi, I’m sure you would never hurt them Clarke but Lexa isn’t acting out of character she’s acting like a protective mother and your pissy about it cause it hurts your feelings. If she thinks that you would hurt mini broody maybe you have given her reason too.” She shrugged. “Or maybe she overreacted who knows? You certainly won’t know shit until you talk to her.”

Clarke nodded. “Maybe your right.”

Charmaine huffed. “Of course I am.”

..............

Clarke sat in her room again drawing pictures of Lexa and Madi. The sadness she felt was beyond words. She had thought about what Charmaine said and knew there was some truth to it. She knows she has to speak with Lexa but thinking about what the brunette said was painful.


	21. Chapter 21

It had been a week since Lexa last talked to Clarke. She had tried this past week but Clarke had there rooms moved to the lower levels so she only really seen Clarke in the distance and she knew how upsetting what she said to the blonde was, She wanted to apologise but she also wanted to give Clarke space. She realises that she should have just heard What Clarke had to say. There was no way she would hurt Madi and to make matters worst Madi has barely spoken two words all week. 

So here she stood in front of the Polis tower looking up to where she knew Clarke’s room was. She watched as the blonde walked out on to the balcony. She looked over Polis with her arms crossed almost like she was trying to protect herself. She looked down and made eye contact with Lexa. Then walked back inside. 

Lexa huffed and rolled her eyes. “It’s not just you.” Raven said from behind her. Lexa turned around to face her. “She hasn’t spoken to anyone and she has told guards not to let anyone approach her and she has them guarding her floor. not even her own mother is allowed in. She’s pushing everyone away. I can easily blow them up but I figured that Clarke just needs some time.”

Lexa clenched her jaw. “I didn’t mean what I said. I was upset.”

“Yeah we know but I can understand why she’s so hurt. You basically told her you don’t trust her with your child.”

Lexa frowned. “I have given her space but it has been a week. I need to talk to her.”

“No shit. How do you plan on doing that?”

Lexa looked up the tower to Clarke’s room. “Guess I’m going to have to climb.”

“What!” Lexa walked into the tower and took the elevator to her floor which was below Clarke’s. Raven was following her. She basically kicked open the doors and walked to her balcony. “Lexa you could die!”

Lexa smirked. “I’m trikru Raven, climbing in in my nature.”

“Yeah well Echo is Azgeda and can stand in the cold for great amounts of time but I don’t kick her out in the cold!”

Lexa pauses as she pulled her self up on the the ledge. “Raven. You did that last night.”

“Oh yeah.” Raven chuckled. “Good luck then.” 

Lexa rolled her eyes and started climbing, she slipped when she got to Clarke’s balcony but managed to pull herself up and heave herself over. She landed on her feet like a pro and stood up straight. She walked in and looked for Clarke the blonde was sitting at her desk drawing, she hadn’t noticed Lexa yet. “Why have you been avoiding everyone for the last week?” Clarke jumped and stood from her chair. She frowned at Lexa and looked at the balcony doors. “I know blood must not have blood but if you make the guards come in here I will make them bleed and if your wondering how I got in I climbed.” Clarke’s eyes widened as she hurried out the door and looked over the balcony, she could see Raven on Lexa’s balcony. 

“Princess!” Raven waved then gave her the finger.

Clarke rolled her eyes and walked back into her room. 

Lexa followed her. “I understand why you have been avoiding me Clarke but why everyone else?” The blonde sat at her chair and continued to draw. Lexa sat down beside her. “So your not talking to me?” Clarke kept drawing. “Madi’s not talking either you wouldn’t happen to know anything about that would you?” Lexa sIghed. “She misses you.” She said softly. Clarke froze but didn’t look up from her drawing. “I miss you.” The blonde huffed and kept drawing. “Clarke? I was angry. I didn’t mean what I said.”

Clarke cleared her throat. “What’s Done is Done. This isn’t the life you want, so I made it easier for you and Madi. I will take over as Heda. Octavia and Indra will be my advisors. No one will ever know Madi is a nightblood. It won’t ever come from me or anyone else that currently knows.”

“What?” She shook her head. “That’s not what I wanted either.”

Clarke threw the pencil and drawing on the table in front of them. She lent forward with her elbows resting on her knees. “What do you want from me Lexa?” She finally looked at the brunette. ”Friendship? I can do that. I can be the person you can lean on and expect nothing in return. Do you want a lover with no strings attached? Just sex? I can do that too it would hurt like hell but I’m strong. Or do you want a political partnership? We work well together, everyone knows that.” She shrugged. “Or maybe you would like a child minder. Someone to take care of your daughter but to never really be close to her?” She looked Lexa in the eyes. “Which one?”

Lexa looked like a fish caught out of water. Her mouth was opened and her eyes were wide. “I-“

“Can’t be friendship. Because friends trust each other, they can rely on each other. Can’t be a lover because you don’t seem to want a physical relationship with me. I think you have made that abundantly clear and it definitely can’t be a political partnership because as you have stated many times, this isn’t your life anymore.” Clarke took a deep breath. “And it definitely can’t be a child minder, since you think I’d put Madi in danger for political reasons.”

“Clarke I-“

“SO.” She said loudly cutting Lexa off. “In my opinion you want nothing from me.” She shrugged. “That’s ok though. I’ve felt alone my entire life. I had one moment in my life where I felt complete, where I felt happy. Truely happy. I count myself lucky I had that at all because not a lot of people get that, so I’m grateful. My place on this earth is clearly not to be loved. So I made it easier for you and Madi. I’ll lead these people, I’ll do it alone. I’m ok with that but just before I kick you out of my room I want you to know that i didn’t completely agree with Octavia. Madi is so full of life. She’s special. Like you. She says what she wants, she does what she wants. She’s a born leader Lexa,   
I mean she walked into a coalition meeting because she was bored and because she wanted to spend time with me and when the ice nation Ambassador asked if his clan could venture to see what was left of Azgeda Madi started talking to him about it. So Lexa. What I was going to say that day before you asumed the absolute worst of me is that people are going to find out that Madi is a nightblood and that she is your daughter but not from any of us. Most likely from Madi herself. I was going to suggest you tell people so you have more control over the situation but it’s ok. Now I truely how you feel. So....GAURDS!” GAURDS came running into the room. “Get her out.”

“Clarke?”

“Bye Lexa.” She said softly. 

The gaurds approached Lexa. She turned sharply and glared at them. “Do not touch me.” She said in a low threatening voice. The gaurds froze looking at Clarke for instructions. Lexa turned to Clarke. “Clarke we are not done.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “That’s not what you said a week ago.”

Lexa turned back to the gaurds. “Leave us.”

“You are not in charge anymore Lexa. Take her away.”

One of the guards reached out to her but she grabbed his arm and twisted it around his back. The other gaurds tried to get her from behind but she elbowed him in the face breaking his nose. Lexa looked at Clarke. “Clarke I’m sorry.” Lexa said sincerely. “I was upset. I don’t want this life for Madi. I had that life and it was horrible. You know that. I’m sorry for taking it out on you.” 

Clarke shrugged. “It’s fine. Let my gaurds go and leave.” Clarke looked away. “Please.” She said softly.

Lexa let the guard go and sighed. “We miss you.” She said quietly.

Clarke just looked at her with tears in her eyes. “Bye Lexa.”

Lexa sighed then turned around and left.

....................

When the gaurds removed her from Clarke’s room she made her way back to her own room and slammed the doors open and closed. She then picked up a chair and threw it across the room.

“Whoa.” Raven said as she walked into the room from the balcony. “What has that chair ever done to you.” Lexa rolled her eyes and started pacing. “So I take it your talk with Clarke went well.” 

Lexa huffed. “She is the most stubborn person I have ever meant in my entire life!”

“Well you hurt her Lexa.”

“I didn’t mean it!”

Raven held up her hands. “Yes I know that.” Raven sighed. “She loves you Lexa.”

“No she-“

“Oh my god if you say that she doesn’t I’m going to get one of my special toys shove it up your ass and blow you up!” Lexa stopped pacing and looked at Raven wide eyed. “You weren’t there. You didn’t see her after she thought you died. You didn’t watch her almost waste away to nothing. Jesus Lexa! She carries around a piece of tech that was stuck in the back of your neck for shit knows how long just so she could feel close to you! You have no idea how much that woman loves you! She has never stopped loving you!”

Lexa slumped down on her bed wth her hands in her hair. “What do I do? I didn’t mean it Raven. I apologised.”

Raven sat down next to her. “I’m going to go get Bellamy and have a chat to her but your the only one who can fix this.” She stood up. “You’re lucky your my best friend.”

 

....................

Raven managed to get her and Bellamy to Clarke’s level. It wasn’t easy the guards tried to fight them but Raven promised them if she didn’t let her in she would blow them up and everyone in Polis has seen Raven experiment with explosives so they reluctantly stood aside.

Raven kicked Clarke’s bedroom door, Bellamy was behind her looking on amused. “Hey princess! It’s been a week now and I’m bored, open the doors before I blow them up! You know I will!”

The gaurds looked at each other frightened but when the doors opened they looked relived. 

When they both entered Clarke was sitting at her chair drawing. Bellamy sat on one side and Raven on the other. Bellamy picked up a drawing off the table, it was a beautiful sketch of Madi watching the sunset. “Your drawings never cease to amaze me princess.”

She sighed. “What do you both want?”

Raven huffed. “Wow nice to see you too.”

“Raven I’m busy.”

“Yeah you look busy.”

“Look.” Clarke sighed. “I’m fine Ok.”

Bellamy squeezed Clarke’s shoulder. “Clarke. You’re not fine. Talk to us.”

Clarke looked at the drawing of Lexa and Madi scatttered in the table. “What would you like me to say Bell? Look at these.” She said pointing to the drawings. “This is something I’m never going to be apart of and I have tried so damn hard! I thought hey Maybe Lexa just needs time you know but then she goes and assumes that I would put Madi in danger and for what? The greater good? For the coalition? I would never do that! I would rather die! I love them damn it!” Clarke slumped forward and started crying. “I love them, I love that stubbrun woman and I love that little girl and I had to tell her last week that I didn’t care about her so her and Lexa could be free from my burdens! Free from Polis politics! So what the hell would you like me to say! I feel like I’m dying! But at least if I keep myself busy it stops hurting for a while!”

Raven wrapped her arm around Clarke’s shoulders, Bellamy did the same. They held the blonde and let her cry. 

Raven shook her head and looked at the blonde. “Clarke she loves you.”

“Don’t Raven.”

Bellamy nodded. “It’s true princess.”

“Stop.” She warned.

Raven got up from the chair. “Ok so look this is what happens with us ok. We go through things we come up with plans and somewhat fix it or it just goes to shit.”

Clarke looked up at her. “What.”

“We need a plan Clarke. A plan for you and Lexa.”

“Raven she doesn’t want me.”

Bellamy held her tight. “Clarke she talks about you all the time. Her face lights up and she get all.” He waves his hands around looking for the word.

“Heart eyes!” Raven finished for him. 

He clicked his fingers and pointed at Raven. “Exactly!”

Before Clarke could argue Raven clapped her hands. “Ok so look Clarke seriously if you are ok with this lone wolf bullshit we will support you but I just want you to know what your getting into.”

“What-“

Raven held up her hand to stop her. “Hey look I’m just being honest here let’s think about this. Commander hot stuff is a catch.”

“Raven-“

“Nope.” She held up her hand. “She is.” She shrugged. “She Just all types of awesome, on a different level to me of course but still she’s a catch. Right Bell?”

“Yeah.” He shrugged. “If I knew she was into men I’d totally-“

“Ok.” She Glared at him and cut him off. “What’s your point Raven?”

“My point is I know of at least.” She held up her hand counting her fingers silently. “Eight people that have asked me if Lexa is single.”

“What!” Clarke stood from her chair.

“What bout you Bell?”

He rubbed his chin. “I lost count honestly.”

Clarke huffed. “Who are these people?”

“Anyways.” Raven ignored her. “I’m not saying she will move on straight away but.” She shrugged. “She will eventually. You ok with that Clarke?”

She clenched her jaw. “Yes.” 

Bellamy chuckled. “So you’re ok with with let’s say Tom asking Lexa to the festival your holding.” Tom was a member on skairku. He wa a loyal to Bellamy. He was tall muscular, handsome and basically a really good person. She had send over the last week Lexa share a few laughs with him in the distance but she didn’t have t worry about him because Lexa wasn’t attacked to men.

Clarke took a deep breath. “She will say no.”

“Oh yeah you’re right.” Raven said. “What about Gai?”

“Excuse me?”

“You know indra’s daughter?” Raven chuckled. “You do know that they have kissed before right.”

Clarke’s eyes widened. “She has only been with Costia and myself.”

“Well der.” Raven smirked. “Doesn’t mean she hasn’t tried to move on.”

Bellamy chuckled. “Look princess.” He sighed. “You can do what ever you like. In fact you WILL do what ever you like.” He looked at her sympathetically. “I know what she said hurt you but people say hurtful things sometimes when they are upset. I mean shit when you get angry you do it too.”

“Not to that extent.”

Raven sighed. “Me and Lexa have been spending time together princess. She told me what she went through as a kid. It was pretty fucked up.”

“Yeah she told me about it too.” He looked at them sadly. “Gave me nightmares.”

Raven stood next to Clarke. “I can totally understand why she reacted the way she did. She didn’t know Octavia changed the conclave. In her head she was thinking that Madi would be going through the same thing. I’m not excusing her behaviour all I’m saying is I understand.”

“But I would never allow anyone to hurt Madi!”

“We know.” Bellamy said. “But she was upset Clarke and dare I say, scared.” Bellamy squeezed her shoulder. “Just talk to her give her a chance to explain.”

Clarke frowned. “What if she doesn’t want to be here.”

“Ugh.” Raven through her hands up. “Not this again.”

“But I told madi-“

“That kid has the biggest heart Clarke. She will forgive you if she hasn’t already.” Bellamy smiled. “She asked about you Just yesterday.”

“She did.”

“Of course. She loves you.”

Clarke smiled softly. “Ok.”

Raven punched the air. “I’m so awesome.”

“Hey I helped.”

Raven rolled her eyes. “Ok you helped slightly. Lexa is gonna love me even more.”

“Don’t see your friendship bracelet.” He grumbled.

“I am not getting into this again Bellamy Blake! Lexa is MY best friend. You got the princess!”

“That’s bullshit!” Bellamy stood.

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Gees Thanks Bell.”

“No offence princess but I want Lexa! YOU have Clarke!”

Raven groaned. “No way! You handle her way better then me! Beside I have made her something way better then a friendship bracelet.”

“I offered her children!”

Raven huffed. “That’s just creepy!”

Clarke groaned. “Oh god.” She shook her head. “Is it better then my ring Raven?”

“Pfft no. She loves that thing.”

Clarke smiled. “Good. Now stop fighting over Lexa and get lost.”

....................

Lexa was lying in her bed next to Madi both staring at the ceiling. Both sad. “I miss Clarke.” Madi said sadly. It’s the most She has spoken in a week.

“Me too.” 

“She said she didn’t care about us.”

“Chit?”

“Yes. She did. But I don’t think she meant it Nomon. She’s sad.”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“It is a long story.”

Madi turned towards Lexa. “Nomon. Clarke said she was lonely.” Lexa turned towards Madi. “Go make her feel less lonely Nomon so we can spend time with her.”

“It’s a little more complicated then that.”

Madi huffed. “I’m not stupid Nomon!”

Lexa reached and and pulled the girl towards her. “I know.” She whispered.

“Then tell me please.” She sobbed.

“I said something very hurtful.”

Madi’s eyes widened. “Nomon fix it.”

“I don’t know how.”

“Make her something! Take her somewhere! Say sorry! Anything Nomon! Remember when I lost uncle Murphy’s cooking book and he was upset and I made him a really nice drawing and he forgave me! Just do that!”

Lexa chuckled. “I will try.” She promised.

.....................

When Madi fell asleep Lexa made her way onto the balcony and started climbing again to get to Clarke’s room. The doors were opened and Clarke was sitting at her desk drawing again. “You told Madi you didn’t care about us?”

Clarke jumped in fright. “Jesus Lexa!” She said holding her chest. “Stop sneaking up on me and stop climbing the tower before you get yourself killed!”

Lexa walked to the desk. “You told Madi you didn’t care about us?”

Clarkes shoulders slumped. “Yes I did, I told her that to keep her away I am giving you what you want.”

“But THAT is not what I want Clarke!”

Clarke sighed and walked around the desk to Lexa she stood in front of her and gripped the bottom of her shirt. “I know.” She said quietly. “I’m glad your here I wanted to talk to you I was going to seek you out tomorrow.”

“You were?”

“Yeah.” She smiled. “I had a talk to raven and Bellamy I still haven’t come up with a solution for the coalition business but.” She sighed. “I was wondering if you would like to go on a date with me?”

“A date?”

“Yeah.”

“Ah.” Lexa ran her hand down Clarke’s arm. “What is that?”

“Well. We would go somewhere, just the two of us and spend time alone.”

“Oh.” Lexa frowned. “Ok But I want to talk.”

Clarke held Lexa’s hand. “Me too but Before we do Lexa I need to know. I can’t do anything with you if I don’t know....”

“What is it?”

“Do you want me to be part of Madi’s life.”

Lexa cupped both Clarke’s cheeks. “Yes.” She said firmly. 

Clarke smiled. “I want to one day be apart of your family.”

“You are.”

“No im not. I’m the outsider.” Lexa shook her head ready to argue but Clarke placed her hand over Lexa’s heart stopping her. “No it’s ok. I understand. You have all spent six years together. Whether you like it or not I’m an outsider but I have never been one to back down from a challenge so if you want me part of your family Lexa I will fight like hell to be apart of it but if you don’t let me know now and I’ll back off, I can’t be an outsider forever. It’s hurts.”

“I’m sorry you feel that way.”

“It’s not your fault. We have been apart for six years. We both thought each other were dead. You, Murphy, Emori and the kids have spent all that time together. Right now I feel like I’m not part of it.”

Lexa held Clarke’s hips. “I don’t want you to feel that way.”

“Well Leksa. When you accuse me of trying to use your daughter for political reasons what am I suoppose to feel?”

Lexa Sighed. “I’m sorry Clarke. I didn’t mean it.” She held the blondes shoulders. “I was scared. I didn’t know Octavia changed the conclave and I just do not want Madi to go through what I did. I jumped to conclusions.”

Clarke looked at her sadly. “What would make you think that I would harm her?”

“I don’t think that.”

“Then why say it.”

Lexa closed her eyes and exahled. “If I tell you can you promise me you won’t ignore me again.”

“Ok. I promise.”

“In that moment I understood from a leaders point of view why you would want to use Madi and...it’s not the first time you have chosen your people over me.”

Clarke flinched and walked backwards. “Ok.”

“Clarke you promised.” Lexa pleaded.

Clarke swallowed the lump in her throat. “That’s not fair! That was so long ago things were different and you did the same thing to me!”

“I know.” Lexa said softly. 

“I need to be alone.”

“Clarke-“

“This isn’t me shutting you out Ok this is me trying to process and trying to think of how to move forward.”

Lexa nodded and moved slowly towards the blonde. She cupped her cheek and gently kissed her on the forehead. “I’ll seek you out tomorrow.”

Clarke nodded and held her hand getting her to stop. “Lexa Wait...” She sighed. “When you asked me to stay in Polis that day...going back to Skaikru was one of the hardest decisions I have ever had to make.” Her eyes watered. “I wanted to stay so badly. I wanted to stay with you. To fight with you. It took me so long to understand why you left me at mount weather but in that moment... I knew what it must have felt for you. My heart was screaming at me to stay but my head.” She tapped her temple. “My head was telling me I had to go back and help Skaikru, I had a responsibility to them.” She cupped Lexa’s cheek. “But make no mistake Leksa kom trikru. I wanted to choose you.” She swiped her thumb against her cheek. “If you made me choose right now between Polis and you and Mads. I would pack my bags and leave with you both. I would leave and I wouldn’t turn back, I spent six years regretting leaving that morning, thinking over and over so many different scenarios of what would have happened if I stayed.” she ran her hand down Lexa’s neck and caresses the shooting star tattoo behind her ear and smiled. “But I know you would never make me choose and I....” She shook her head. “I just want you to be happy Lexa. So I mean this when I say it. Listen to me i beg you. If you want to leave then please just go. Go take Madi, go back to the bunker and live your life.”

“That’s not-“

Clarke moved forward and kissed her on the lips cutting her off. She pulled back and smiled. “Or stay. Go live with the people like you suggested.”

“Clarke-“

Clarke kissed her again. “I just want you to be happy. You and Madi. So have a think about it, I just need to be alone right now and I need to make things right with Mads.”

Lexa smiled. “Ok.”

Clarke smiled back then wrapped her arms around her shoulders. “It’s Ok to want some peace for yourself. I won’t ever hold it against you. Goodnight Lexa.”

Lexa stood back and kissed Clarke softly. “Goodnight Clarke.”


	22. Chapter 22

When Lexa woke up in the morning Madi wasn’t beside her, she went looking for her in Clarke’s room but she wasn’t there either. She ran into Murphy on the way to the dinning hall. “Heya brother have you seen Clarke or Madi?”

“Yeah they said something about something and they would be back later.”

She rolled her eyes. “So informative brother.”

He grinned. “Thanks.”

She walked past him and knocked his shoulder playfully and made her way to the dinning hall. Octavia was sitting with Indra and Bellamy. All three looked her way. “Lexa!” Bellamy said loudly. She smiled and made her way to him. 

“Good morning Bellamy.”

“Morning.” He side hugged her as she sat next to him. “So have you and Clarke made up?”

“Yes, we still have a lot to discuss though.”

“That’s great Lexa it’s progress.”

“Sha.”

Octavia cleared her throat. “Indra, Bellamy could you give me a moment with Lexa.”

They both nodded, stood up and left. Octavia moved to sit next to her. She knocked her shoulder. “You talking to me yet?”

“I was never not talking to you Octavia.”

“So just avoiding me then?”

“Sha.”

“Lexa. Listen. I would never suggest Madi be a noviciate if it would put her in danger. I got rid of the stupid conclave crap.”

“I know that now.” Lexa said softly. “You should have opened with that.”

Octavia smiled. “I guess I should have I’m just pissed off really that I worked so hard and it meant nothing.”

Lexa shook her head. “It meant a lot to a lot of people Octavia. The people of Polis love you and respect you. I told Trishana you were a fine Commander.”

“Thanks. That means a lot. I’m sorry I made you think that I wanted to use Madi for political gain. I would protect her.”

Lexa smiled. “I know.”

“So? You and the princess have made up?”

“We have some things to work through but we are talking again which is nice.” 

Octavia decided not to tell Lexa about her confrontation with Clarke. She knew the former commander and her only friend would get angry. “Good.” She lied.

“Did you figure out why you resent her so much.”

“Yes But I don’t want to talk about it right now.”

Lexa smiled. “Thank you for keeping your word.”

“You welcome.”

“I have decided to get to know Niylah.”

“Oh. Really?”

“Sha. Since you kept your promise my friendship with you must mean a lot so I will try to get to know the woman you love because your friendship means a lot to me too.”

Octavia gave her a tight lipped smile. “Thank you.” She looked away guilty.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.”

“What do you think about me training the nightbleeders that come into Polis.”

“Lexa. That’s an excellent idea!”

“I haven’t told Clarke that’s what I want to do, do you think she will be ok with it?”

Octavia rolled her eyes. “Lexa you could tell her you want to shovel shit and she would support you. Beside you don’t need her permission I’m in charge of the warriors and you have my approval..” Lexa smiled bashfully. “Although maybe you need to train some more before you train the future leaders of the world if that fight we had speaks anything about your abilities.”

Lexa smirked. “Is that right?”

“Sha.” Octavia grinned. 

Lexa nodded then elbowed Octavia in the stomach. Octavia grunted and tackled Lexa to the ground. “Admit I won!” Lexa said as she got Octavia in headlock.

“Never!”

Bellamy walked back in and laughed. “What are you two doing? If Clarke finds out she will be pissed. Maybe you should stop?”

Octavia scoffed as she pinned Lexa down. “I’m not taking advice from someone who offers their sperm to their friends.” 

Bellamy blushed. “It’s not as weird as it sounds!”

Octavia laughed. “Sure brother.” She grunted and Lexa flipped them and stood up. 

“It’s a nice gesture. Don’t be mean to your brother I’m sure plenty of people do that.”

“Nope.” Octavia laughed. “Just him.”

Bellamy huffed and walked away. As he got out the doors he felt someone jump on his back. “I still think it’s nice Bellamy kom Skaikru, don’t listen to your sister.”

He smiled as Lexa rubbed his hair. “Thanks Lexa.”

“Where are you going?” She asked still on his back.

“The school to work on some stuff.”

“Want some company?”

“Sure.” He smiled. 

......................

Clarke woke up just before then sun rose and made her way to Lexa and Madi’s room. She slowly crept in and and walked to the bed. She smiled at the scene. Madi was taking up most of the bed leaving Lexa almost hanging of the side. She shook Madi gently to wake her. Madi’s eyes opened slightly, when she realised it was Clarke her eyes lit up and she went to squeal but Clarke smiled and covered her mouth. Madi nodded and carefully got out of the bed. Once they were outside the doors she ran into Clarke’s arms. Clarke picked her up and laughed. She took Madi’s hand and lead her to their secret spot. 

Once they got up to their spot Clarke sat down and Madi as usual sat in her lap.

“I missed you Clarke.” The girl said softly.

“I’m sorry mads. I missed you too and your Nomon. I swear I’ll never do anything like that again, I thought i was doing the right thing but I never meant to hurt you.” She hugged her tight. “I love you Mads.”

Madi smiled. “It is Ok Clarke and I love you too.”

“Ok?”

“Sha. Even the great Wanheda can be stupid sometimes.”

Clarke smiled and hugged her tight. “I’m not going anywhere Madi, I promise I will be in you life one way or another.” 

“Good.” Madi smiled.

......................

Bellamy and Lexa were lazying around her bedroom. Lexa was on her bed reading while Bellamy was on the chair also reading when the door burst open and Raven walked through, Bellamy fell off his chair in fright making Lexa and Raven laugh. 

Echo walked in. “What’s so funny?”

“Your girlfriend doesn’t know how to knock!” Bellamy grumbled getting up off the floor.

Raven shrugged and jumped onto the bed next to Lexa. Echo sat on the chair laughing at Bellamy who was still going on how rude Raven is. “Can I help you Raven?”

Raven turned her head to look at the brunette. She looked truely confused. “No why?”

Lexa smirked. “You burst into my room.”

“So?”

Lexa chuckled. “Never mind.”

Raven grinned. “Actually I Come baring gifts.” She pulled out a little square box.

Lexa frowned. “Why?”

“Cause your MY best friend” she glared at Bellamy who in return gave her the finger.

“Oh you didn’t have to Raven.”

“Just open it.” She rolled her eyes.

Lexa nodded and opened the box. Inside was a watch. It had black leather bands and it was gold plated. “Raven where did you get this?”

“I found it. It was broken, I fixed the shit out of it took me weeks. The time is right by the way.”

“Thank you Raven I will wear it always.”

Raven smiled and tackled her to the bed. Lexa chuckled and shook her head in amusement. “Huh! Told ya she would like mine better Blake!”

Bellamy rolled his eyes. “What ever.” He mumbled.

Raven laid down next to Lexa. “So where’s the princess and the mini Heda?”

Lexa shrugged. “I believe that Clarke is trying to make amends.”

“What about you both?”

“She needs some time and I respect that but I think we will be ok I just don’t know where to start.”

Raven turned towards her. “Why does she need time?”

Lexa Sighed. “She asked me why I could have thought that she would use Madi and I was honest.”

Bellamy slumped down at the foot of the bed. “What did you say.”

“I told her it wasn’t the first time she has chosen her people over me and I could understand from a leadership point of view why she would use Madi.”

Echo lied down next to Raven and hugged her. “That’s rough Lexa.”

“She asked.” Lexa shrugged. “I was just honest.”

They all looked towards the door when there was a knock. “Enter.” Lexa said still lying down.

Abby walked in and smiled at the scene. “Feeling lazy are we?”

They all groaned. 

She laughed and sat on the edge of the bed. “Lexa have you fixed things with my daughter yet?”

“We are working on it.”

“Yeah.” Raven scoffed. “Lexa was brutally honest.”

“I was not brutal.” She groaned. “Never mind I don’t want to talk about it anymore.” She turned away from Raven.

Abby sighed. “Move over.” Lexa shuffled over and Abby lied down next to Lexa staring at the ceiling. “She’s stubborn.”

“Sha.”

...........................

Clarke and Madi has spent the whole day together, they went for a walk around Polis, to the training pits and sat on the top of the tower where Clarke taught the little girl how to draw. While spending time with Madi Clarke had a lot of time to think. She understood where Lexa was coming from. 

The both walked into Lexa’s room and stood in shock. Lexa was on her bed but on her left was her mother on the right was Raven and Echo hugging and at the foot of the bed was Bellamy who’s arm was dangling over and they were all sleeping. 

Madi giggled. “Clarke? How did this happen?”

Clarke chuckled. “I don’t know. Hey go get the camera from Raven’s room.”

Madi giggled and ran out of the room. When she got back Clarke took some pictures. “Come on goufa we are going to go develop these now.”

“What will we do with them.”

Clarke laughed. “Embarrass them of course.”

.......................

Lexa woke to someone clearing there throat. She rubbed her eyes and sat up and frowned at the sleeping occupants on her bed. She looked up to the sound of giggling. Clarke and Madi standing at the foot of the bed with their arms crossed grinning at her. “Ready goufa.”

Madi smiled and held up a little cherry bomb that raven had made. Clarke new it worked cause Raven proudly showed her many of times even though Clarke insisted that it would never get used. She lit up the end and walked back with Madi. 

The cherry bomb caused a loud explosion sound. Bellamy screamed and fell off the bed while Raven jumped on Echo and Abby covered her ears and screamed. 

Madi and Clarke where clutching their stomachs in laughter. Lexa fell back to the bed and laughed.

Bellamy grumbled as he stood up. “Very funny princess!”

Abby got up from the bed. “Clarke! You almost gave me a heart attack!”

Raven was still covering echo. “Are you Ok babe?” 

Echo nodded. “You covered me?”

Raven looked at her funny. “Of course.” She smiled and looked over her shoulder to Clarke. “My cherry bomb worked again princess!”

Echo was still staring at her. “Will you be my wife?” She asked Raven who was grinning at Clarke.

“And you said they would never be use-Wait? Huh?” She looked down to Echo. 

Echo gently put a strand of hair behind Ravens ear. “I love you Raven Reyes of the sky people. Will you be my wife?”

Raven looked at her wide eyed. “Are you sure? Did the cherry bomb send you in to a state of delusion?”

Echo leaned up and kissed her softly. “You are the best thing that has ever happened to me. I’m not letting you go.”

Raven blinked like she couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “Me?”

Echo laughed. “Yes you.”

Raven smiled. “Yeah.” She said with tears in her eyes. “Yeah I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” 

Madi squealed and ran to Raven. “Your getting bonded!”

Lexa held Raven’s shoulder. “Congratulations.”

Abby stood wiping away the tears and Bellamy looked away to hide his tears. 

Clarke was gazing at Lexa and smiled watching the brunette interact with everyone. When Lexa caught her eye she smiled gently. 

Octavia walked in and stood next to Clarke. “What’s going on?”

“Echo just proposed to Raven.”

Octavia chuckled. “Good for them.” She looked at the blonde. “Have you stopped being a baby?”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “I wasn’t-“

“Yes you were.” Octavia cut her off. She turned to the blonde and lent in so just she could hear her. “You better get your shit together Clarke before you lose her for good.”

Clarke glared at her. “You Don’t know what your-“

Octavia scoffed. “Grow some balls Clarke. Your not good enough.” Octavia walked away to congratulate the couple. She watched as Lexa got off the bed to greet Octavia. The brunette wrapped her arm around her shoulder and pulled her to her side. Clarke felt her blood boil in jealousy.

Lexa turned and walked to Clarke. She held her arm. “Did you and Madi have a nice time?”

Clarke pushed back her jealousy and smiled. “Yes. Hey Lexa?”

“Sha.”

“Can we talk later tonight.”

“Of course.”

“Good.” She kissed Lexa on the cheek. “I have things to do we will talk tonight then?”

“Ok.”


	23. Chapter 23

Lexa had asked Murphy and Emori to watch Madi for the night, the little girl was a bit upset that she couldn’t see Clarke again today but Lexa assured her that Clarke would most likely make time for her tomorrow. 

As Lexa made her way to Clarke’s room she was thinking about how happy both Raven and Echo were and that she would really like that one day. She never thought she would not even when she was with Costia. Bonding has never really been something that she had ever considered, especially after she had thought Clarke to be dead but now, now that she has Madi and that there is peace and the fact that she was standing in front of the door that had the woman in it she once thought was dead, now she wants it all and she wants it with Clarke.

So she stood in front if Clarke’s door and took a big breath but Before she could knock the door opened. She was greeted by Clarke who looked surprised. The blonde smiled and took the brunette in her arms. “I was just coming to look for you.”

“Sorry. Madi was not happy that she didn’t get to see you again tonight.”

“I’ll make it up to her tomorrow.” She held Lexa’s hand and pulled her in. The table was set up again with candles and food. Clarke stood against the table with her arms crossed and a smirk on her face. “I didn’t need Murphy’s help today.”

“Is that so?”

“Yeah, he was impressed didn’t even say anything rude but that may also be cause I threatened to shove my princess crown up his ass.”

Lexa laughed and sat down. “Will you two ever get along?”

“Hey we get along a lot more then what we used to.” The blonde said sitting down beside Lexa.

“True.” 

Clarke placed her hand on the brunettes thigh. “I have been thinking about us.”

“Yes Me too.”

Clarke looked at the brunettes hand and held them both with her own. “I’d like to think the world we live in now is a lot different then when Skaikru first landed.”

“It is Clarke. We as a society will always have ups and downs but it is much different.”

Clarke nodded and sighed. “Lexa...I would never choose anything over you and Madi-“

“Clarke-“

“No no just let me finish.” She sighed. “I know what it is like to live in a world where you don’t exist it is the hardest thing I have ever had to live through, not going to war, not praimfiya, not living in space with basically nothing. No.. the hardest thing I have ever had to do is exist without you.” She smiled. “And Madi..Now Madi is in my life I can’t imagine a life without her either. I would never give you both up for anything. I’d never hurt you or her Lexa. You have to believe that.”

“I do Clarke.”

“Ok then.” She took a deep breath. “Tell me what you want Lexa.”

Lexa sighed. “I want you.”

Clarke nodded. “Where do you want to live?”

“Here.”

“Ok. Are you happy with my leadership responsibilities Lexa?”

“Are you?”

“Hmm. I think I’m doing a lot of good but being a leader doesn’t make me happy. You and Madi do.”

Lexa cupped the blondes cheek then leant forward and kissed her. “I feel the same.” 

Clarke sighed in relief and lent her forehead on Lexa’s. “Will you go on a date with me?”

“A date?”

“Yes. It’s when two people who like each other go out and spend time alone and are romantic towards one another.”

“Oh.” Lexa blushed. “That sounds nice.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes. I would love to go on one of these dates with you Clarke.”

Clarke smiled widely then held the back of Lexa’s neck and bought her in for a kiss. They kissed until they ran out of breath. “I don’t mean to break up this up but there’s something else I need to tell you and you have to promise you will not get angry.”

Lexa frowned. “I promise I will not act on my anger.”

Clarke chuckled. “So you’re saying you will get angry?”

“Yes. If you are asking me to promise not to get angry then I most likely will.”

“Ok. So promise you won’t act on your anger?” 

“Yes Clarke, now what is wrong?”

Clarke gently caressed the tattoo behind Lexa’s ear. “It’s about Octavia.”

“Ok?” Clarke sighed and pulled aside her shirt that was hiding the mark from where Octavia cut her. Lexa rubbed her thumb over it gently. “Clarke who did this?” When Clarke didn’t answer Lexa shot up from her chair. “OCTAVIA did this!”

Clarke stood up with her. “Come on sit Lexa, let me explain.” Lexa sat with her fists clenched. “She still blames me and Bellamy for Lincoln’s death. She hates me Lexa. She wished I was dead.”

Lexa clenched her jaw and eyes shut and lent forward on the table with her fingers pinching the bridge of her nose. She was breathing heavily trying to calm down but with no avail. She hit the table hard making the cups and plates rattle. Then she pinched the bridge of her nose again taking deep breaths trying to calm down once more. “What else did she say?” 

“Things that are just between her and I.”

“Clarke...”

“Lexa, I’m not telling you this so you can be my saviour, I can take care of myself.”

Lexa stood abruptly. “Is that why you LET her do that to you!”

“Lexa don’t yell at me.”

“I am not yelling at you! I am just yelling!”

“Well then don’t.”

Lexa started pacing. “How dare she lay her hands on you!” She huffed. “She had a chance to tell me and she didn’t! That coward!” 

“Lexa-“

“She is NOT a good friend!” Lexa turned sharply towards Clarke. “Why did you let her do that!”

“Lexa. Stop yelling at me.”

“I’m not yelling at you! I am just yelling Clarke! I just found out that one of the people I call a friend held a blade to the throat of the woman I love! So I am yelling because you made me promise not to act on my anger! I am yelling instead of dragging Octavia to the fighting pits and beating her bloody!”

Clarke looked at her with tears in her eyes. “You love me?” She asked softly.

“I need to find her now!” She huffed as she walked to the doors. 

Clarke jumped in front of her and held her shoulders. She squeezed them slightly then moved her hands up behind Lexa’s neck. “You love me?”

“Clarke not now! Octavia needs to be-“

“You love me?” She asked again.

Lexa sighed and looked at the blonde. Looking into her blue glassy eyes made the anger leave her body a little. She held the blondes waist. “Of course I love you Clarke. I have always loved you. Even when I thought you hated me I loved you. I loved you since the first moment I laid my eyes on you. I loved you even when you hated me for ordering finn’s death and I loved you when I left that you at that cursed mountain, I loved you so much that I had my people following you to ensure your safety, I had a prince bring you to me and use it as a disguise for political reasons. I loved you when you chose to leave Polis and go back to Skaikru, when I thought I was dying I loved you. When I thought I was dying I died happy knowing I had you even if it was brief and I loved you when I woke even though I thought you were dead. I love you Clarke Griffin of the sky people and I always will till my dying breath.”

Clarke pulled Lexa in for an bruising kiss and moved her backwards till she was sitting on the bed. She’s straddled the brunette and pulled back. “I love you so much Lexa.” Clarke kissed the tattoo behind the her ear. “I love you.” She kissed her on the lips.

“I love you too Clarke now please move.”

Clarke chuckled. “There is no way you are leaving this room after saying all that to me.”

Lexa groaned. “Clarke. I need to speak to Octavia and.” She took a deep breath and looked away. “I’m not ready yet.”

Clarke cupped both of her cheeks. “I know. I just meant you could stay in here just you and I and hold each other all night.”

“Oh.”

“And kiss of course.”

Lexa blushed. “That does sound nice.” 

Clarke stood and held out her hand for Lexa to take once she did Clarke led her to the side of the bed. “Let’s get undressed.”

Lexa nodded and started unbuttoning her pants but Clarke had other ideas. She held Lexa wrist and moved it away and looked at Lexa for permission. Lexa nodded and Clarke smiled as she unbuttoned the brunettes pants and slowly dragged them down her legs. Lexa kicked them off to the side and stood looking at the blonde. Clarke placed her hands under Lexa’s shirt and felt her abs making Lexa shiver. Clarke chuckled while Lexa blushed. “Sorry.” She smirked and lifted her shirt over her head leaving her in just her bra and underwear. “Wow.” Clarke stood closer to her. “You are so beautiful Lexa.”

Lexa smiled. “So are you.” She pulled the blondes top over her and placed her hand over the blondes heart. “In every way.” She said softly looking into her blue eyes. The blonde smiled and kissed her, Lexa pulled back and undid the blondes button on her pants and pulled the pants down her legs. Clarke stepped out of them and lifted the blanket up and got under, she left the blanket up for the brunette to get in, so she did and lied as close to the blonde as she could. The blonde put her over Lexa’s hip and kissed the brunette slowly. 

She rested her head on her hand and looked down to the brunette smiling. She looked down to their hands started playing with the former commanders fingers. “Are you ok?” She asked softly while looking at her.

“Yes.” She smiled back. 

“Good.” She lent down and kissed her. 

“Clarke? Please tell me why you let that happen. I know you can protect yourself I have seen it.”

Clarke frowned. “When?”

“When you weren’t talking to me I watched you train.”

“Oh.” She looked away.

Lexa cupped her cheek and turned her head so she was looking. “Please?”

The blonde sighed. “I guess I blame myself for Lincoln as well.”

“But pike killed him.”

“I know, I just.” She sighed. “I shouldn’t have ran away.”

“Clarke, Lincoln’s death is not your fault.”

“But-“

“No Clarke. It’s not. Pike did it. Not you. We both have to let go of the past if we are to move forward. Lincoln was your friend. But he chose his fate he sacrificed himself for the people he cared for that was his choice and she shouldn’t tarnish his memory or make his sacrifice worth nothing by blaming you and Bellamy. What’s done is done. We are here now and he is not. I knew Lincoln, there would have been nothing that would have stopped him from doing what he did. He loved her. I can not lose you Clarke.”

“You won’t-“

“You let a person hold a blade to your throat.” She said while gently touching the mark on the blondes neck. “I can’t lose you Clarke. Not again.”

Clarke lent down and kissed her. “I promise if there is a next time I will fight.”

Lexa smiled. “Thank you.” She lent up and kissed her. 

Clarke wrapped both her arms around Lexa and snuggled into her neck. “I’m never letting you go Lexa. I will do what ever you ask of me even if it’s to leave here and go live in the bunker. I don’t care, I’m not ever going to lose you again. I love you.”

Lexa turned around in the blondes arms. “I want to stay here. I want to build a life with you and Madi here Clarke. I understand you have responsibilities and even though that is not my life anymore I understand that it is yours. I respect that. I’m not going to lose you.” She kissed her softly. “I want to train the nightbloods.”

Clarke eyes winded. “Lexa. That is excellent. You would be so good at it. Are you sure?”

“Yes. Training the nightbloods-“

“Was your favourite part about being commander. I know.” She smiled. “It’s perfectly suited for you.” She kissed her. “Your perfect.”

Lexa scoffed. “I am far from perfect Clarke.”

Clarke held her close till there noses were touching. “I’m going to marry you one day Lexa. It’s going to be the biggest wedding our people have ever seen. It will be in our history books. People will talk about it for centuries.”

Lexa laughed. “Is that right?”

“Yes.” She smiled. “Wait and see.” She kissed her. 

“What will you wear?”

“I will wear a grand white dress that will highlight your favourite part of my body.” Lexa looked towards her chest making Clarke chuckle. “I was talking about my hair Heda.” She teased. Lexa blushed and hid her face in the pillow. Clarke laughed and pulled her close kissing the brunette all over her face. When her laughter died down and Lexa stopped hiding she looked into Lexa green eyes and kissed her softly. “I love you.”

“I love you too clarke.”

They both held each other close and fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel this story is coming to a end so if you have anything you want to see drop a comment and let me know. :)


	24. Chapter 24

Clarke called a meeting with Octavia and Indra. They both joined her in the throne room. When they entered Clarke was sitting at the table and going over paperwork. She looked up and gestured to them both to sit down. 

“Why are we here?”

Clarke sighed. “Good to see you to Octavia.”

“Wanheda.” Indra intervened. “I mean no disrespect but we have other things to attend.”

“Yes I know. The warriors are looking great.” Clarke took a deep breath. “I’m going to be completely honest with you both.” She looked at them in their eyes. “I’m in love with Lexa.”

Octavia and Indra stared at her waiting for her to explain more. When she didn’t Indra Frowned. “Yes?”

“Oh.... You knew?”

Octavia scoffed. “You’re joking right?”

“No.” She frowned. “I knew you knew I cared about her but I never thought you knew I loved her.”

Indra smiled. “Everyone knows Clarke but what does You loving Lexa have to do with why we are here?”

“Right.” She said shaking her head. “Lexa and Madi are my number one priority, their happiness is extremely important to me but so is the future of our people. Lexa doesn’t want to be Heda and the ambassadors want a nightblood sitting on the throne.”

“And?” Octavia drawled. 

“And I think the answer to our problem is me taking on role as commander. No one would call me that they would most likely call me Wanheda. I would take on the responsibilities as commander until a nightblood is ready to take my place. Lexa has expressed an interest in training the nightbloods. I believe this will please the ambassadors.”

Octavia scoffed. “Where does that leave me and Indra?”

“It would leave you to do what you do best and from what I can gather, do what you enjoy.”

“Training the warriors?” Indra Asked

“Yes. You would both be in charge of the army.”

“But you would command them?”

Clarke sighed. “I hope to never have to use an army ever again for war. But yes I would control the army as has every commander before me.”

Octavia nodded. “I want to speak to Lexa about it.”

“Why?”

“Because her opinion matters to me.”

Clarke looked at Indra. “Indra could you leave us a minute?”

“Sha.” She stood up and walked out the doors closing them behind her. 

Clarke looked at Octavia who was sitting impatiently. “Octavia. I told Lexa about our...disagreement.”

Octavia went pale and swallowed the lump in her throat. “Of course you did.” She shook her head. “Make yourself look like the victim I suppose?”

“No. I didn’t tell her all that we discussed, only that you hate me, the reason why, the fact that you want me dead and that you held a blade to my throat.”

Octavia stood from her chair quickly. “Oh is that all?” 

Clarke rolled her eyes. “If you were worried about her reaction perhaps you shouldn’t have done it.”

She scoffed. “Didn’t know you would tell on my princess.”

“Tell on you?” Clarke shook her head. “I didn’t tell her to hurt you.”

“Why would you then!”

“Because I love her.”

Octavia ran her hands through her hair. “I was going to tell her and now she probably hates me cause you got to her first! This is so unfair! She doesn’t belong to you!”

“Octavia.” Clarke said softly moving around the table to stand in front of her. “I don’t think that way at all.”

“Yeah.” Octavia said with tears in her eyes. “Right. Why is it that you always get what you want and I have to fight for the shitty things I have.”

“Is Niylah a shitty thing you have?”

“Don’t put words in my mouth!”

“I’m not!”

“I need Lexa in my life Clarke!”

“Why!”

“She’s my only friend!”

“By choice!”

“No.” She shook her head. “I’m not the same person I was when we landed and everyone knows it. Everyone is scared of me even my damn brother. But she isn’t. She treats me with respect, she likes me for all of my shitty qualities and she understands what I have had to sacrifice all these years and YOU are trying to take that from me.”

“No I’m not!”

“You all left me here!”

Clarke stepped back and frowned. “What?”

“You, Bellamy, Monty and Harper were MY friends and you didn’t ask if I wanted to come and help save Raven. You all left! You left me behind! I’m always left behind!”

“O...”

“No.” She shook her head and backed away. “Fuck you Clarke.” She shook her head. “Do as you please. Become commander... I don’t care, just Stay out of my way!”

Clarke watched as Octavia marched out of the room and slammed the door. “Fuck.” She sighed.

....................

Clarke made her way to a hill that was over looking Polis. When she got there Madi and jay jay were sitting reading a book quietly next to Emori and the baby and Lexa was sparing with Murphy. 

She made her way to them with a smile on her face. “Getting your ass kicked again Murphy?”

He looked at her smugly. “Pfft. I let her win.”

Madi giggled. “Every single time uncle?”

“Yeah. It’s called being considerate.” Lexa huffed and kicked his legs out from underneath him making him hit the ground. He groaned. “See? Considerate.”

Clarke laughed and made her way to Lexa who was helping up Murphy. She kissed the brunette softly on the lips. “Hi.” Her eyes widened when she realised she just showed affection in front of the family. She looked around for a reaction, Murphy was still groaning from being thrown to the ground, Emori was cooing at her baby and the kids were still reading. 

Lexa noticed the blondes reaction and smiled as she wrapped her arm around her waist while the other arm slung over her shoulder. “Hi.” She kissed the blonde making her blush. “Clarke.” She chuckled. “They all know how much I love you.”

“Oh.” Clarke blushed. “That’s nice.” She kissed the brunette again and then made her way to the children, she sat behind Madi and pulled her so the girl was sitting in her lap. “So what are we reading Mads?”

She held up the book to Clarke. “Snow White.”

“That’s one of my favourites.” She kissed the top of her head. She looked at the little boy and ruffled his hair. “Hello jay jay.”

“Hey princess!” He smiled. “Guess what!”

“What?”

“I helped my daddy cook today! It was so much fun!”

“That’s nice.”

She reached over and stroke the babies cheeks and looked at Emori. “And what about you two what did you both get up to today.” She said looking at Emori.

“Well.” Emori smiled. “We did nothing.”

“Really?”

“Yes it was nice.” She smiled. “Your mother stopped by and told me what it would entail to be a nurse.”

“Yeah?”

“Yes It sounds like something I would be very interested in. She also spent most of the day nursing this little ball of trouble.”

“That’s excellent Emori you would make a good addition to the clinic and mom has always been good with kids I’m not surprised.”

“Thanks.” She smiled.

Lexa sat beside Clarke and Madi and wrapped her arms around them both. “What did you do today?” She kissed her on the cheek.

“That’s something I want to talk to you about later.”

“Ok.” She Frowned. “Is everything ok?”

“Yeah.” She smiled and lent over for a kiss. “It’s fine.”

Murphy groaned and sat down next to Emori and the baby. “I hate that word and gross get a room.” Emori laughed and pushed his face away.

.................

Clarke led Lexa to her room and dragged her out on the balcony. When Lexa sat down Clarke sat down beside her and started kissing her neck. “Clarke.” Lexa moaned. “Didn’t you want to tell me something?”

“Mmm.” She bit down on Lexa’s neck. “In a minute.”

Lexa’s eyes rolled in pleasure. “Ok.” She smiled. She pushed the blonde back softly so she could capture her lips in a kiss. 

They went on like this for twenty minutes before Clarke had to catch her breath. “Can I take you on a date tomorrow?”

“Yes.” Lexa smiled. “Now that you have finished mauling me, there is something you wanted to tell me?”

Clarke chuckled. “You were mauling me to Heda. I’m sure I have to marks to prove it.”

Lexa rubbed her thumb over the red marks on her neck. “I’m not sorry.”

“Believe me neither am I.” She sighed. “I spoke to Octavia.”

“Did she hurt you?”

“No. But have you thought of how you are going to deal with her.”

Lexa sighed. “No. But I’m assuming you have a suggestion?”

“Yes. Lexa, You mean a lot to her and I never realised.” She frowned. “I don’t want to come between your friendship.”

“Friendship?” She scoffed. “She held a blade to your throat!”

“I Held a blade to yours once.” She looked at her sadly and cupped her cheek. “You forgave me.” Lexa held the blondes hand kissing it gently. “All I’m asking is that you hear her out. If you want nothing to do with her after that I will respect it.”

Lexa nodded. “I like her.”

“Yeah I have noticed.” She smiled. “I was a bit jealous when she visited you at the bunker.”

“Jealous?” Her eyes widened. “Clarke you have absolutely nothing to be Jealous about.”

“I know. I was just jealous that she got to spend time with you and I didn’t.”

“Good.” She kissed the blonde. “Cause I only want you.”

“Me too.”

...............................

Octavia was in her room when Niylah entered.

“Hey.” She said softly. “I have been looking for you all day where have you been?”

“Here.”

Niylah Frowned. “Why didn’t you tell me we could have spent Time together.”

“I just want to be alone.”

She sat next to Octavia. “Why what’s wrong?” She held her hand. 

Octavia snapped it back. “Nothing!” She stood. “Fuck Niylah I just want to be fucking alone is that ok with you!”

“Octavia.” She said hurt. “Why are you yelling at me?”

She scoffed. “Because I just want to fucking be alone!” She groaned. “Your always around!” Octavia eyes widened realising what she had just said. She didn’t mean it in that way but by the Look on Niylahs face, she certainly took it that way.

Niylah wiped a tear that fell. “I’m sorry I did not realise that my presence annoyed you so blodryana. I will go.”

“Niylah..” she sighed. “I’m not attacking you I’m just asking for space. Is that so hard?”

“No.” Niylah shook her head. “If it is space you want then you will get it.”

As Niylah walked to the door Octavia held her back gently. “I’m sorry ok.” She sighed. “I have had a rough morning and you know when I get like this I like to be alone.”

“Never from me.”

“I can never get what i want.” She shook her head. “All I want it to be is alone and for you not to make a big deal about it.”

Niylah scoffed. “I’m not Lincoln.” She said sadly.

Octavia turned to her quickly. “What?”

“I’m not Lincoln so I suppose I will never be what you want.”

“No that’s not-“

“Bye Octavia.”

“No Niylah!” She went to hold Niylah arms but she ripped it out of her grasped and slammed the door in Octavia’s face. The queen stood there with tears rolling down her cheeks.

...............

Lexa took a deep breath making her way to Octavia’s room. She decided to take Clarke’s advice and listen to what she had to say. She was lost in thought as someone bumped into her. She held their upper arms to steady them. Niylah has red brimmed eyes and puffy cheeks. “Niylah? Are you well?” 

“Sorry Commander.”

“What is wrong?”

Niylah smiled sadly. “Octavia...”

“What did she do?”

“She’s been pushing me away and I have been fighting for her but I am tired.” She sighed. “I can’t be pushed any more.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Thank you.” 

She went to pass but Lexa blocked her way. “I’ll talk to her.”

“It won’t matter, I’m not him.”

She frowned knowing that the him she was referring to would have to have been Lincoln. “She loves you. She told me so.” 

“If she loved me, she would not treat me this way.”

“But-“

“Heda.” She held her hand. “You can not fix this.”

Lexa frowned. Then squeezed her hand back. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault.”

“If you need anything you can come to me I was telling Octavia not long ago that I would like to know you better. Clarke talks highly of you.”

She smiled. “And she talks very highly of you, always has.” Niylah looked away sadly thinking she would love nothing more then to have what Clarke and Lexa have. To have Octavia speak highly of her. “I will see you later?”

“Yes, I would like that.”

Lexa watched as Niylah walked away. She frowned and marched her way to Octavia’s bedroom and kicked opened the door. “Niylah?” Octavia jumped from the bed. Her face was hopeful but fell when she seen it was Lexa. “Oh. you.”

“Oh me?” Lexa snapped. “You hold a blade to Clarke’s throat. Wish she was dead and I just seen Niylah run out of here in tears! And all you have to say is “oh you?”

“What do you care!”

Lexa slammed the door shut. She took a big breath. “Talk to me.” She said calmly determined to help Octavia even though she was angry at her.

“Why? I know Clarke told you what happened, don’t pretend like you care..”

Lexa pushed Octavia against the wall. “I am really angry Octavia.” She said lowly. “Do. Not. Push me...speak to me as if I was the last person you will ever see.”

Octavia eyes filled with tears. “If you were the last person I’d ever see.... I’d tell you that I’m...... tired.” She sobbed. “I’m so tired Lexa.” She dropped her head on the brunettes shoulder wiping away her tears on Lexa’s shirt.

Lexa squeezed her eyes shut and pushed aside her anger. She wrapped her arms around the younger girl and held her tight. “It’s ok.” She said softly.

“No it’s not.” She cried. “Clarke has everything that I want. Everything! When do I get what I want Lexa?”

“What does she have that you don’t?”

“Happiness.” Octavia held on to the back on Lexa’s shirt and cried.

“You could have that too.” She said softly patting her back.

“No I can’t.”

“Why?”

“Because it’s not fair on him.”

“Who.” Lexa pulled Octavia back. “Lincoln?” She nodded and buried her face in Lexa’s shoulder again crying uncontrollably. “Octavia.” the brunette sighed. “Lincoln was a good man. He did what he did so the people he cared for could live.” She pulled her back once more and wiped away her tears. “It is not Clarke’s fault or Bellamy’s. It was Pike. He pulled that trigger. No one else did. He would have wanted you to move on. Not be like this.” She frowned. “So angry and isolated that was the complete opposite of who Lincoln was.”

“Every time I look at them I’m reminded of him and all the things he could of had. How am I suppose to move past that?”

“By realising that what you are thinking are things that will never happen. Lincoln is gone. He’s been gone for a long time now. This is the present, that woman you just upset.” Lexa pointed to the door. “She’s in love with you Octavia. She is not just your present but she could also be your future. Lincoln is in the past and I don’t know why he was taken from the world but he was, and you got to live and you are choosing to do it alone.” She pulled her back and held her arms so she could look directly into her eyes. “You are one of the biggest reasons why we have peace.” She wiped away more tears. “He would be so proud. He would want you to enjoy it. Not be like this.”

Octavia nodded and hugged the brunette tight again. “What am I going to do?”

“Stop being a fool for one.” Octavia chuckled. “This is where you make Niylah realise that you can be her future as well.”

“What about Clarke?”

Lexa rolled her eyes. “She has the biggest heart. She will forgive you, she most likely already has...I however will not if you ever threaten her like that again.”

Octavia nodded. “Ok.”

“Ok.” She sighed. “You need to eat and sleep and wake up tomorrow and leave the past behind you.”

Octavia stood up straight and wiped her face. “It’s easier said then done.”

“I never said it would be easy. I suppose at the end of the day you’re the only one who can figure out if it’s worth the fight or not.” She held Octavia’s shoulder. “I hope you realise all that you can have Octavia.”

Octavia smiled. “Thanks lex.”

“Ok now I have something of great importance to discuss with you.”

Octavia nodded and stood up straight. “What is it?”

“What is a date? what happens on these dates? What does one wear to a date?”

Octavia laughed at the seriousness from the former commander. “Sit down lex we have a lot to discuss.”

..................

When Lexa left Octavia’s room, Octavia left looking for the one person on her mind. Niylah. She found the woman packing her bag. “Hey.” Octavia said softly. Niylah sighed but didn’t look up. “Where are you going?”

The woman shrugged. “Scavenging.”

“Scavenging?” She looked concerned. “What? No.” She hook her head. “That is beneath you Niylah.”

“I used to be a trader, I’m the most experienced.”

“So?” She moved closer. “You don’t have to do that anymore.”

“I used to like it. It’s fine.” She said putting the bag on her back and moving past Octavia.

“Niylah please don’t go!” Niylah turned. “I love you. Ok.” She walked closer to her. “I’m sorry for the shitty way I have treated you. I’m So sorry babe. I’m just. I’m so angry but not at you.”

Niylah sighed. “Why are you angry now all the sudden?”

Octavia held her hand gently and was relived when the other woman didn’t pull away. “When we were in the bunker I was always busy and now it’s peaceful I have more time to think.”

“And what do you think of?”

“All the things that Lincoln is missing out on.”

Niylah nodded and adjusted her bag strap. “Ok.” She said as she turned. 

“Wait Niylah!” She pulled her back. “I don’t want you to be him. I love you for you. You are so free and I love that so much about you. I love everything about you.”

“But I’m not him.”

“No you’re not.” She entwined their fingers. “I don’t want you to be him or wish you were him. I love you.”

Niylah took a step back. “And I love you.” She said softly. “But lately I have been thinking that if Lincoln were here, I would not exist in your life.”

“Babe.” Octavia walked forward desperately. “I am so sorry I made you feel that way, I don’t know what our lives would be like if he was still here. All I know that he’s not and I love you and I am so glad I got to spend these last years In The bunker with you. You are the only person that kept me sane, that made me smile.”

She sighed. “You loved him and he was taken from you I understand. Really I do. But I deserve more then what you have been giving me and I haven’t made you smile since the doors to the bunker opened.”

“That’s got nothing to do with you, you’re right...I haven’t been happy and that is all on me. I promise Niylah, I promise you make me happy. Let me prove myself to you.”

“You don’t have to prove anything-“

“Damn it Niylah I love you!” She yelled desperately. “Please don’t go.”

Niylah moved forward and kissed Octavia on the cheek. “I need to go Octavia but I will come back.” She said sadly wiping the tears from Octavia’s face.

Octavia wroapped her arms around her quickly and kissed her neck. She held her tight for a minute or two. She had fucked up and she knew it, the thought of Niylah leaving her was hard to handle but this is the part where she had to prove herself and to do that she had to give Niylah space. So she took a deep shakey break and whispers in her ear. “I’ll be waiting.” She let go and made her way to the door. She looked over her shoulder. “I love you Niylah. Safe travels.”

“I love you too.” She replied quietly.

....................

Lexa had just finished having lunch and was making her way to the sparring grounds where she would meet Madi. 

“Lexa!” She heard Bellamy call her name.

She turned and smiled at the man. He had a woman beside him, she had seen her around before, she realised she was from the prisoner ship. “Hello Bellamy.”

Bellamy smiled and hugged her. He slung his shoulder around hers and turned to the other woman. “Lexa this is my friend Rebecca.”

The woman smiled kindly and held out her hand. “Nice to meet you.”

Lexa shook her hand. “You as well.”

“So.” The woman smirked. “Your the one the bell boy offered his sperm to.”

Bellamy groaned. “I am never going to live that down. And who told you!”

She laughed. “Raven.”

He scrunched up his face. “She’s an ass.”

She chuckled. “Don’t tell Raven that.”

Rebecca smiled. “Well it was nice meeting you Lexa, I’m going to go back to the ship I have some plans to make for the school.” She looked and Bellamy and smiled. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

He rubbed the back of his neck and blushed. “Ah Yeah.”

She walked away. “That’s if your not busy trying to spread your seed bell boy.”

He shook his head. “It was once.” He called. “And only to Lexa!” She smiled over her shoulder and waved.

Lexa laughed and nudged him in the ribs. “You like her?”

“What? Pfft. No...”

“Yes you do.” She smiled. “You’re blushing.”

He rolled eyes and crossed his arms. “Well I usually get embarrassed when people talk about my sperm Lexa.”

She laughed. “Does that often happen to you Bellamy?”

“What no..” she shook his head. “I mean....what? No....” he nudged her. “Shut up.” 

“Come on.” She laughed. “Let’s go I have to meet Madi at the sparring pits.”

“Can I Come?.”

“Sure.” She shrugged.

..................

Octavia sat by the sparring grounds and watch as Indra trained the warriors. “Hey.” She heard Clarke say as she sat down beside her. “I just talked to Niylah, She’s Scavenging?”

Octavia rolled her eyes. “Nothing gets past you.”

“She looked sad?”

“Yup.”

“What did you do?”

Octavia took a deep breath. “Pushed her away.”

“Well...that was dumb.”

“Yes. Thank you.” She huffed.

“Things will work out.”

Octavia looked at her. “You sound so sure.”

The blonde shrugged. “Cause I am.” The blonde started to stand thinking that Octavia didn’t want to talk to her.

Octavia pulled her back down gently. “Wait.”

The blonde turned towards her. “What?”

“I’m going to try to be better.”

Clarke smiled. “I’m glad. You should start with your brother.”

Octavia frowned. “I have been nicer to him then I have you.”

Clarke raised an eyebrow. “That’s not saying much.”

“Right.” Octavia shrugged. “I don’t feel like talking to anyone right now and you know my brother is a talker.”

She scoffed. “Believe me I know.” She smiled.

“Niylah has left me Clarke.”

“I figured. She will be back though. It will be ok.”

Octavia huffed. “I have treated her so badly, I will be lucky if she even looks in my direction ever again.”

“Well What is it you keep telling me. Grow some balls and fight for her.”

“I deserved that.”

“Actually.” The blonde tapped her chin pretending to think. “You deserve much worst but.” She shrugged. “I think we have all suffered enough don’t you?”

“Yeah..”

“So how about we start fresh. I will forget that you held a blade to my throat and wished I was dead.”

“Just like that?”

“Yes. Just like that.” She sighed. “And you forget that we left you behind...”

Octavia swallowed the lump in her throat. “I don’t care about that.” She lied.

“O...”Clarke said softly. She nudged her, when Octavia looked back at her her eyes were watery. “We didn’t leave you because we don’t love you, we left you because we knew that you could handle things in the bunker if anything was to happen. You were more grounder then you were Skaikru, they didn’t see you as one of us they seen you as one of them and now look.” She pointed to the training pits. “I can’t tell anyone apart and you did that.” She shook her head. “But I am so sorry that we made you feel like we didn’t care about you.”

“Ok.” She smiled sadly. “Ok.” She held out her hand. “Fresh start.”

Clarke shook her hand “fresh start.”

“I won’t always be ok though.”

“And I understand that.”

“Do you think I can fix things with Niylah?”

“Yes I do. Cause she loves you....”

Octavia looked back down to the sparring rings. “I don’t deserve her.”

“I know what that’s like. Sucks huh?”

They watched as Lexa walked on the pits with Madi with Bellamy trailing behind them. Everyone stopped and watched as Lexa took off her jacket. She was wearing a skin tight singlet that showed of her arms and abs. Octavia chuckled. “I can understand why my brother offered Lexa his sperm.”

“What?” Clarke looked down at the scene.

“Clarke.” Octavia chuckled. “Everyone wants Lexa’s babies.”

“What! Who the hell are these people!”

“Look.” She pointed to the training pits where every woman and man were checking out Lexa.

Clarke shot up from her spot and marched towards the pits. “Hey! Get back to work!” She yelled.

Everyone jumped and starting going about there business. Lexa looked at her concerned. “Is everything ok Clarke?”

She shrugged and looked at anyone who dared to speak out when she found none she seen Madi was giggling behind her hand. “Something funny goufa?”

“You are funny Clarke.” She ran to Clarke and hugged her around the waist. “Me and Nomon are going to train are you going to watch?”

“Sure.” She smiled. Madi ran off and picked up a staff. 

Lexa stood close to her. “What is wrong?”

“When are we telling people we are a couple?”

“A couple?” She frowned. “A couple of what?”

Clarke smiled. “Your adorable.”

Lexa blushed looking around making sure no one heard. “Clarke!” She whispered.

Clarke laughed. “I mean a couple like Emori and Murphy and Raven and Echo?”

“Oh.” Lexa smirked and quickly moved forward kissing the blonde on the lips. “There now everyone knows.” She smiled and kissed her again then made her way to Madi.

Bellamy stood next to her. “Bell is it just me or do people look sad.”

He laughed hard and slapped his knee. “Yup.” He laughed again. 

“Let me get this right? People are actually sad that Lexa is no longer single?”

He laughed again. “Looks that way.”

“What?” She huffed. “What the hell!” She said quietly to herself.

Lexa and Madi made there way back. “Clarke!” Madi yelled running to her. “Don’t go anywhere ok.”

“Ok.” She smiled and kissed the top of her head. “I’ll go sit down.”

“Love you.”

“Love you to Mads.” She walked up to Lexa and kissed her cheek. “Love you to Heda.” She said softly.

Lexa rolled her eyes but smiled and mumbled an I love you back.

...............

After an hour and a half of training Madi, Clarke asked if she could step in. Lexa smiled and moved aside and found a spot near Bellamy and sat down. Clarke was showing Madi some fighting stances when she felt a tap on her shoulder. She turned and was a big bulky looking man that had no fat anywhere on his body, just muscle smirked at her. “Wanheda. A word?” 

Clarke turned to Madi and kissed her head. “Go sit with Nomon.”

“Ok.” She said and ran towards the brunette who was looking at the man curiously.

He held his hands behind his back. “I am Jai and I had just noticed that you openly kissed Lexa kom trikru, former Commander.”

“And?”

“And.” He huffed. “I am much more worthy for her affection then you are.”

Clarke’s eyes widened. “Excuse me....”

“Look ar me.” She smiled and waved down his body. “And....look at you.” Clarke frowned and looked down at herself then back to the man. “I am much more desirable.”

Clarke took a deep breath. “Maybe.” She snapped. “Lucky for me then that Lexa kom trikru likes people of intellect something that you obviously lack!”

He laughed and Clarke watched as a crowd starting gathering. “I don’t need to be smart Wanheda. Look at me.”

People started snickering. Clarke looked back to Lexa and Madi who looked confused. 

Clarke groaned and took a step back to kick Jai in the balls. He fell to his knees. She circled him. “How dare you!” She said so everyone could hear. “I am Wanheda. I am the mountain slayer. You dare insult me!”

He stood up slowly. “Yes.”

“I challenge you.”

He laughed. “Great.”

Lexa made her way through the crowd. “Clarke what are you doing?”

Jai laughed behind her. “Do not worry Lexa. Soon you shall see who is worthy of your affection.”

“Who are you?” She looked him up and down.

“The man on your dreams.”

She scrunched up her face. “That’s disgusting.” 

“Ha!” Clarke pointed at him. “She just called you disgusting. Now tell him how stupid he is Leksa!”

He snarled at her. “I am going to beat you to the ground Wanheda.”

“Clarke.” Lexa said softly. “You don’t have to prove anything.”

“The hell I don’t!” She whispered. She glared an the man behind her shoulder. “Bring it on stupid.”

He laughed again. “Fine.” He took of his shirt and people could clearly make our his big bulging veins in his arm muscles.

“Clarke.” Lexa tried again.

“Lexa.” She said calmly. “Tell Bellamy to take Madi away.”

“No you will not fight this maniac.”

“I can and I will.” She looked over to Bellamy. “Bell take Madi home.”

“What!” He groaned. “I wanna watch.”

“Then be quick.”

Lexa shook her head and moved back. “I’m stepping in if it gets out of hand.”

“You know Lexa I’m offended that you don’t think I have a chance against this idiot. I’m doing this whether you like it or not.”

“Fine.” Lexa huffed and walked away.

Clarke got into fighting stance while Jai stood there laughing. “Look at this.” He waved towards her. “Pathetic.”

Raven walked near the training grounds. “Kick his arrogant ass Clarke!”

He smirked and moved towards Clarke. She stayed still with her fists up. He held his fist back and threw it at the blonde, she dodged it. He then tried to kick her but with his leg in the air she swept his leg out from underneath him making him hit the ground hard. She then kicked him in the ribs three times then the head. She stood back. “The bigger they are the harder they fall.” 

He groaned and stood back up. She ran full speed and jumped on his a  
Back and wrapping her arm around his throat. His face went red as he tried to pull off her arm. He grunted and flipped the blonde over his shoulder. The blonde hit the ground with a thud. He moved to her quickly while her back was turned as he got closer the blonde smirked he went to grab her from behind but she threw back her head and she smiled when she heard a sickening crunch. She then her hand back and she heard him groan in pain again. She then Turned he was on his knees holding his balls with blood pouring out of his now broken nose. “Asshole.” She muttered at she kicked him square in the face knocking him out.

The crowd cheered. People surrounded her giving her applause and patting her on the back. Lexa smiled at her through the people. 

Bellamy ran back and groaned. “Are you serious! I missed it!”

Lexa laughed beside him. “It wasn’t a long fight at all.”

Raven cheered beside them. “Whoop whoop! Go Clarke!” She smirked at Bellamy. “She was so awesome!”

Clarke made her way towards them and kissed Lexa. “Enjoy the show?”

Before Lexa could respond Bellamy huffed. “Ah no I didn’t.” He crossed his arms. “Missed the whole damn thing.”

Raven laughed. “Don’t worry about it Bellamy there will be more people to challenge Clarkey over Lexa.”

The blonde smiled.“Yeah...Wait...What?”

Bellamy’s face lit up. “Your right Reyes! Thanks!”

Lexa chuckled. “Let’s all go eat.”

Raven hooked her arms though Lexa’s. “Now ya talking.” 

Bellamy lead the way. “Wonder What Murphy has cooked up.”

Clarke stood there shocked. “No wait..” she ran up beside Lexa. “What do you mean?”

“Gees princess. Not the sharpest tool in the shed when it comes to Lexa are you?”

“Raven.” Lexa smirked. “Don’t be rude.”

“I’m not!”

Clarke ran in front of all of them and stopped holding up her hands to get them to stop. “Just wait!” She took a deep breath. “Explain!”

Emori walked up beside them with the baby. “Explain what?”

“Oh the baby!” Raven clapped her hands and held out her arms. Emori laughed and handed the baby to Raven.

“Well.” Bellamy smirked. “I think Clarke is starting to realise that her girlfriend is irresistible.”

Emori looked at Clarke strangely. “Really?”

“Ok.” Clarke huffed. “Lexa you are never to speak to anyone ever again.”

Lexa smirked. “Clarke...”

“Nope.” She held up her hands. “Ok that’s a little unreasonable.” She sighed and scrunched her face up trying to come up with something else. “Ok how about you wear unflattering clothes.” She shook her head. “No I like the way you dress...” she trailed off. “What if I announce that anyone who try’s flirt with you should be killed.” She sighed. “Damn it blood must not have blood....” she threw her hands up in the air. “What the hell am I going to do! I’m a busy person Lexa I can’t fight every tom, dick and asshole who wants to challenge me for you!”

Lexa laughed and walked towards the blonde and held her waist. “Trust that you are all I want Clarke Griffin of the sky people. I love you.”

Clarke rolled her eyes and huffed. “I love you too but this is a joke right? Never had to put up with this shit while I was with Bellamy.”

“Well.” Lexa looked Bellamy up and down. “I’m not surprised.”

“Yeah.” He laughed then froze after what Lexa said. “Hey!”

Raven laughed and bounced the baby up and down. “Clarkey just accept that she’s hot and get over it. Come on let’s go eat.”

Lexa smiled and kissed the blonde. “I love you.”

“Love you too.” She held her hand. “Come on I’ll make you something for lunch.”

“Mochof.” She smiled. 

...................

Clarke was sitting next to Abby in the mess hall eating some food. She had worked up an appetite fighting with Jai and she hadn’t eaten all day. Madi was sitting in her lap merrily eating her food while Lexa was in an intense conversation with Bellamy about history. Everyone around were full of chatter and excitement from the fight they had witnessed. 

“Can you believe it?” Clarke asked her mother. She had just finished telling her about the fight and the fact that so many people in Polis found Lexa desirable.

Abby looked at her strangely. “Yes....”

“What?”

She smiled at her daughter. “Honey.” She said quietly. “You know I’m not one to gossip-“

“Mom...that is a lie you gossip all the time.”

“I’m merely repeating what I hear that’s not gossiping.”

“That is the very definition of gossiping.”

Abby shrugged. “Anyways as I was saying, I hear a lot being in a hospital. People talk cause they have nothing else to do. The reason I’m not shocked is because Lexa.” She whispered. “Is always the talk of Polis.”

“What!” She whisper yelled leaning into her mother. “Why?”

“Because honey.” she looked around to make sure Lexa couldn’t hear but she couldn’t, She was too busy talking to Bellamy. “Because people think she’s some type of god and they are always talking about how attractive they think she is.”

Clarke frowned. “I don’t get it.” She looked at Lexa who was laughing at something Bellamy said. “I mean Clearly she is gorgeous but-“

“Honey.” Abby chuckled. “It’s not just her looks it’s the way she carries herself.”

Clarke frowned. “Oh.”

Abby held her daughters hand and whispered in her ear. “You are in love with her honey. She could be all scarred with messy hair and rags for clothes and you would still feel the same about her. These people see her from the outside. They see a god complex. Not....”

“Not Lexa.” 

Abby smiled. “Exactly. You can’t take it to personally honey. She’s like one of those people we used to watch in them movies.”

“A celebrity?”

“Yeah!” 

Clarke looked around the room and seen that almost everyone was glancing towards the brunette even if it was briefly. “Huh.” She smiled. “I guess your right.”

Lexa turned to her and smiled. “What is your mother right about?”

Clarke cupped her cheek and kissed her. “Nothing.” She smiled.

“So.” Abby said interrupting them. “Your date is tonight.”

“Yes.” Lexa nodded. “I have asked muphry to watch Madi.”

“Actually.” Abby interrupted. “If it is ok with you and with Madi of course.” She said smiling at the girl who was smiling back at her. “I was hoping that I could watch her tonight.”

“Oh.” Lexa said a bit thrown back. “Ah. It’s fine with me Abby.”

“Me too.” Madi clapped. “We are going to have so much fun!”

Abby laughed. “I could use some help around the clinic.”

Madi’s face went serious. “I am at you service Abby.” She sat up straight. “The work of a healer is one to be taken very seriously.” She nodded.

Abby smiled at the girl. “I already got Raven to get you a device so you can mark down all we get up to today.”

He eyes widened and then she squealed. “Clarke! Nomon! Did you hear that I’m going to be a doctor today.”

Clarke laughed and kissed the top of her head. “You can be what ever you like Mads.”

Lexa smiled. “Sha.”

“Good that’s settled then” Abby smirked. 

“Mom. Don’t try and make an apprentice out of her.”

“Clarke.” She held a hand to her chest. “I would never.”

Clarke rolled her eyes and looked a Lexa. “When I was a child I will never forgot the first time mom got me my device.”

“Yes.” Abby laughed. “She had followed me around all day in the while little coat I had made up for her when she got home she had told Jake that she wanted to be a doctor.”

“It was funny.” The blonde smiled. “Dad was devastated that I didn’t want to be an engineer and called mom a cheat because he got to me first.” She shook her head. “He pretended to have his heart ripped out of his chest.” She chuckled. “He literally got a fake heart that apprentices use to study and held it in his hands. He carried it around for days and pouted” She laughed. 

Lexa smiled. “You sound a lot like him Clarke.”

“No he was fun and cheeky.” She shrugged. “I’m not.”

Lexa rolled her eyes. “Like setting of cherry bombs to scare people isn’t cheeky or fun.”

Bellamy raised his hand. “It’s wasn’t fun.”

Clarke smiled and shrugged. “Maybe.”

Lexa ran her hand through her blonde locks. “The more I hear about your father the more similarities I find.”

Clarke turned her head and smiled sadly at the brunette. “He was a good person.”

“And so are you.” Clarke tried to look away but Lexa held the blondes chin gently. “You are hodnes.” She lent forward and kissed her.

“Ok.”The blonde smiled.

Abby smiled at the interaction. Madi was looking up at them lovingly. “You know what else they have in common Lexa?”

“What?”

“Jake was very romantic.”

“Romantic?”

“Mom!”

“What?” She shrugged. “I’m expecting to hear how glorious this date will be tonight.”

“Mom.” Clarke’s eyes winded. “Stop.”

“What is romantic mean?” Lexa frowned.

Murphy perked up on the other side of the table. “Sis remember that time I proposed to Emori! Totally romantic.”

Emori rolled her eyes. “You put a ring in my food and I almost choked and died John.”

Bellamy cackled and the rest of the table followed. “Yeah but then I saved you!”

“And.” She pointed. “After you saved me your exact words were. ‘Damn it now it’s ruined, so what you think.’ And held up the ring to my face.”

Raven laughed. “Oh my god!” 

Murphy shrugged. “It worked didn’t it.” He smirked.

Lexa frowned. “Are you planning on proposing Clarke?”

Clarke coughed up the water she had in her mouth getting it all over Madi. “Sorry Mads.” She started wiping her off. “Ah.” She went red. “That wasn’t on the plan for tonight and please do not take romantic advise from your brother.”

Raven smirked. “She won’t tonight but she will one day.”

“Reyes!”

Lexa smiled. “Please what ever you do do not put a ring in the food, that was quite horrific.”

Murphy huffed and pointed his fork at everyone at the table. “I don’t care what you people say it was very romantic.”

Raven wiggled her eyebrows. “Don’t you worry Lexa.”She smiled at the brunette. “I’ll tell you what romantic is later.”

Clarke’s eyes widened. “No she won’t.” She glared at her friend.

“Ok.” Lexa smiled. “I’ll just ask Bellamy later.”

“Excuse you.” Raven said offended.

Lexa smiled. “He will be honest and not make a fool out of me.”

“I wouldn’t do that!”

“Raven.” Lexa smirked at her. 

“Fine! I was going to give you advice on how to romance Griffin real good.” She winked. “But now.” She shrugged.

“Ewwww Raven.” Madi scrunched up her face. “Don’t be gross.”

“What ever little turd.”

“Love you Raven.” The girl beamed.

Raven rolled her eyes. “Yea Yea your adorable we all know. Little turd.”

“Ha!” Bellamy hit the table. “See.” He wrapped his arm around Lexa. “Best friend.” He dangled his bracelet next to Lexa’s.”

Raven and Bellamy started bickering while Lexa sat there amused. She laughed and looked at Clarke who was looking at her lovingly. The blonde lent in and whispered in her ear. “I will propose one day Lexa kom trikru.”

Lexa blushed and kissed her softly. “Not before I do.”

Bellamy and Raven shouted to together. “Get a room.”


	25. Chapter 25

Lexa was gettting ready for her date with Clarke when there was a knock at her door. She opened to reveal a grinning Bellamy. “Whoa looking good Lexa.”

Lexa looked down at herself, Raven lent her some black leather pants and a leather jacket she had made underneath she wore a green singlet that was lose fitting. Her hair was down and waved on one side of her shoulder. “Thanks.” She smiled as she opened the door letting him in. 

“Nervous?”

“Yes.” She sighed. “Not about being alone with Clarke, more so to the fact that I do not know what to expect.”

He sat down on the bed and shrugged. “Surprises can be a good thing Lexa.”

“This is true.” She said sitting next to him. “Bellamy I don’t know how to be romantic....”

“Really?” He looked at her confused. “Romance can just be a small gesture.”

“Like what?”

“Like when she made you that ring.”

“But you made me jewellery also.” 

“That’s true but that was in a platonic way.” He smiled. “Clarke spent all day making that ring just for you.”

“Oh.” She frowned.

“You will figure it out.” He nudged her shoulder. “Are you nervous for other reasons?”

She sighed and lent forward on her knees. “Yes. Bellamy I haven’t been with anyone in over six years.”

“And?”

“And what if I’m not good at it, what if I disappoint her?”

Bellamy rubbed her back. “That’s not going to happened.”

She sat up and looked at him. “How could you be so sure?”

“Look. Let’s just say worst scenario, you get nervous and you don’t perform the best...what’s the worst that could happen?”

“I could die of embarrassment.”

He laughed. “No you wouldn’t.” He nudged her. “Come on think about it.”

“I think I would be embarrassed.”

“And what about Clarke?”

“She would be supportive.”

“Yeah she would then what do you think would happen?”

“I think I would be nervous to do it again but I think she would ease me into it.”

“Exactly! She loves you Lexa.”

“Yeah.” She smiled. “So what are you doing here?”

“Oh um. I am just about to go meet Rebecca.”

“Oh.” She grinned. “To do what?”

“I’m going to ask if she wants to go for a walk.”

“That sounds nice, are you nervous as well?”

“Yeah a little. I mean she’s lost so much Lexa.”

“Yes. Clarke told me. I think if she can see what a good man you are things will work out. Just be yourself.”

“Thanks.” He smiled.

“But maybe don’t talk about wanting babies this soon.”

He rolled his eyes. “Yea Yeah.”

There was a knock at the door and Bellamy got up to answer it. Clarke was standing there confused. “You’re not Lexa.”

“How observant princess. What gave it away?”

She rolled her eyes. “Well for starters your an ass and she isn’t.”

“Oh.” He held his hand to his heart. “That hurts princess. Truely.”

Lexa smiled and stood from behind Bellamy. “I am here Clarke.”

Clarke’s eyes widened taking in Lexa’s outfit. “Wow.” She said softly.

Bellamy chuckled. “Lexa you better get her a cloth so she can wipe the drawl from her mouth. 

Clark huffed pushed Bellamy put the door. “Go on get out.”

He laughed leaving. “Details later Lexa?”

“Sha.” She smiled. Then Clarke frowned at her. “I mean no.” But winked at Bellamy when he was leaving.

Clarke turned towards her and smiled. She held Lexa hips. “You look gorgeous as usual.” She lent forward and kissed her on the lips. 

“So do you.”

She pulled Lexa out the door. “Come on.”

....................

Abby was writing down notes with Madi sitting next to her putting something in her tablet. “What are you doing Madi?”

“I am taking notes.”

Abby smiled. “What of.”

“The patient we just seen. Do you want to her what a wrote.”

“Sure.”

“I wrote that Indra kom trikru was diagnosed with a cut to her cheek which was stitched by Abigail Griffin.”

“Good work.”

“Sha. I also noted that you chose to stitch instead of using glue as it was too deep.”

Abby smiled and hugged her to her side. “Great work. Maybe you can assess the next cut.”

“Oh really!”

“Yes.”

“Abby?” The girl asked softly.

“Mmm.”

“Do you think my Nomon and Clarke with be bonded one day?”

“I have absolutely no doubt.” The little girl looked nervous. “What is it?”

“Do you think that I could one day call Clarke mother?”

Abby hugged the girl. “I think that would make her very happy.”

“Does That mean you will be my grandmother!?”

“I suppose it does.” She smiled.

“Good. Now let us see the next patient.” 

..........................

Bellamy waited near the school for Rebecca. “Hey bell boy.” 

“Hey.” He said rubbing the back of his neck. “Ah hows it going?”

She laughed. “Good. You ok?”

“Yeah I’m just wondering if you might like to take a walk?”

She shrugged. “Sounds nice.”

He waited till she was beside him then gently put his hand on her back guiding her where he wanted to take her. They walked for an hour when they came to a nice little area that looked over the Polis tower. She sighed. “It’s beautiful here.”

“Your beautiful.” He blurted out. His eyes widened. “Ah I mean.”

She chuckled. “You just say what ever is on your mind don’t you?”

He groaned. “It feels like I have no control.”

She laughed. “Hey thanks.” She smiled. “Are you looking for something more with me Bellamy?”

“Ah.” He blushed. “I think it would be nice to go out with you on a date or something.”

She held his hand softly. “Bellamy.” She sighed. “I really like you but-“

“Oh.” He said pulling his hand back. “It’s ok I understand.”

“No.” She said grabbing his hand again. “What I was going to say is, I’m still dealing with a lot here Bellamy and I just don’t know when I will be ready.”

“I can wait!” He said quickly turning towards here. “You are worth the wait.” He said more calmly.

“Really?” She Frowned.

“Yes!” He smiled. “I think your an incredible person Bec. Truely the most amazing woman I have ever meant. Your gorgeous and kind not to mention extremely smart.” He shrugged. “I can wait. You are really worth the wait.”

She smiled and cupped his cheek. She lent in slowly and kissed him on the lips. Bellamy gently held her waist letting her take the lead. She pulled back. “Ok.”

“Ok?”

“Yeah I will date you.”

“Yes!” He threw his hand in the air.

“Your such a dork bell boy.”

He shrugged. “It’s part of my boyish charm.”

She laughed and sat closer to him and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders and kissed the side of her head. “I’m going to romance the crap out of you. People will talk about it for years.”

She laughed and hit his chest. “Well Clarke briefly told me what she had in store for Lexa tonight. You have you work cut out for you.”

“Oh it’s on!”

.............................

Clarke drove Lexa to a lake that her scouts had told her about. The water was tested by raven and came back clean. The area was surrounded by beautiful trees, it was peaceful. Once they stopped Clarke got a basket and a blanket from the from the back and held Lexa’s hand to lead her closer to the water. She lied the blanket out and patted a spot beside her. Lexa smiled and sat down while Clarke got out food she had prepared when she was down she wiped her hands on her pant and looked a Lexa whomwas watching her intently. “Hey.” She smiled and lent over to kiss the brunette.

“Hi.”

“I made all of this.” She gestured to the food. 

“I am sure. It all looked wonderful Clarke.”

“Thanks I’m kind of proud.”

“And so you should be. It looks great.”

After They ate Clarke stood and slowly started removing her clothes.

“What are you doing.” Lexa asked blushing as Clarke lifted her shirt over her head.

“Going for a swim are you coming?”

Lexa stood and started removing her clothes as well, when she was in her underwear she walked past the blonde smirking at the way the blonde was looking herup and down. She went under the water and came up slowly. When she felt Clarke jump on her back. They both laughed. 

Lexa turned and Clarke wrapped her arms around her shoulder and her legs around her hips and started kissing the brunette. They same around for hours and lost track of time as the sun was setting. Clarke led Lexa back to the car and handed her a towel and both of them had dried off. She looked across the river to the other side of the bank and smiled. “Come on!” She said excited and pulled Lexa to the blanket, she pulled Lexa so she was sitting between their legs. “Look over there.” She pointed to the sky. 

Lexa tensed when she her a pop. But then all the sudden the sky had exploding lights. “The lights Raven was talking about.”

“Yeah.” Clarke kissed the back of her neck. “She has been annoying me about it for week so I told her she could practice away from Polis and for our date.”

More lights coloured the sky. “It’s beautiful Clarke.” 

Clarke moved the brunettes hair to one side and ran her fingers down the scar that the flame once had a place. She kissed it gently and hugged her tight. They watched for 15 minutes as fireworks coloured the sky. When it was done Lexa turned towards the blonde and lied her back on the blanket and started kissing her neck. “This Date was wonderful.”

“Thanks.” Clarke closed her eyes as Lexa nibbled on her ear.

“But it is getting late and I think we should’ve heard back.”

“Mmm.” Clarke sighed. “Five more minutes.”

Lexa laughed and kissed her. “Ok.”

They made out for an extra thirty. 

..........................

Clarke smiled as she pulled into Polis, they both made their way to Clarke’s room. “Oh!” She said. “I forgot.” She made her way to her desk drawer and pulled out a parchment and handed it to Lexa. Lexa opened it and it was a beautiful drawing herself, Madi and Clarke lying in bed together. 

“Clarke it’s beautiful.” She kissed the blonde. “You have to stop giving me things like this I can’t ever match it.”

The blonde shrugged. “You give me plenty just by breathing Lexa.”

Lexa put the parchment down and wrapped her arms around Clarke. “I make good bread?”

Clarke laughed and wrapped her arms around Lexa’s neck. “I know.”

“Do not worry Clarke I will figure out this romantic issue sooner or later.”

Clarke smiled and shook her head. “Just don’t take advice from Murphy or raven.”

“Ok.”

“Do you want to stay the night.”

“Sha.”

Clarke and Lexa dressed down to their underwear, facing each other they held each other tight. “Lexa?”

“Sha.” She said sleepily. 

“I can’t believe you’re here.”

Lexa opened her eyes and pulled the blonde towards her. Kissing her lightly. “I am and I’m not going anywhere anytime soon.”

Clarke ran her hand through her hair. “I can’t lose you again. I wouldn’t be able to bare it.”

“Clarke-.”

“No.” Clarke shook her head with tears in her eyes. “This is our someday Lexa.”

Lexa’s eyes watered at the memory, she smiled at Clarke and nodded. “Yes. It is.” She kissed her. “It is, I promise I won’t leave this world easy and we will both protect Madi with all we have”

“Good.” She sighed. “I’m going to become commander till their is a nightblood that can take over. You will train those nightbloods and we will live in Polis in peace.”

Lexa chuckled. “You have it all figured out don’t you clarke kom Skaikru.”

“Well as peaceful as it can get, we still have our annoying friends and family.”

Lexa laughed. “Yes, this is true.”

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Bellamy better not offer you his children again. Or anyone for that matter.” She grumbled. “Murphy is going to drive me crazy and Raven is going to keep us both busy trying to keep her out of trouble. Mom will be overbearing and Octavia is Octavia....a pain in my ass.”

Lexa laughed and kissed Clarke again. “You forgot Emori and the baby.”

“Oh well I like Emori she will cause us the least amount of grief. As for jay jay and the baby...they are to cute to cause trouble.”

“And Madi.”

“Well.” clarke smirked. “Madi is your daughter....so who knows.”

Lexa chuckled. “She’s yours too.”

Clarke gulped. “What.....”

Lexa shrugged. “If you want. I haven’t spoken to Madi but she already keeps asking me when we will get bonded and she loves you so-“

Lexa was cut off as Clarke tackled her to the bed planting kisses all over her face. “I love you.” She kept saying over and over again while Lexa just laughed joyously. Clarke sat up straddling Lexa’s hips. “Does that mean I’m a mom?”

“Yes.”

“Wow.” Clarke smiled and jumped off the bed heading for the door.

“Clarke?”

“I have to go tell Madi!”

Lexa laughed. “Clarke you’re in your underwear.” Clarke looked down and rushed to her wardrobe pulling her pants on quickly and almost tripping over heading for the door again. “Clarke?” Clarke looked to the brunette who was lying on the bed watching amused. “Your shirt.”

“Oh right.” Clarke said running to the wardrobe and throwing on a shirt. She ran over the the bed and pecked Lexa on the lips. “I’ll be back soon.” She called over her shoulder rushing out the door.

...................

Abby woke to someone banging on her door. She rubbed her eyes and groggily made her way to the door. When she pulled it open Clarke rushed passed her. “Clarke?” She rubbed her eyes.

The blonde smiled over her shoulder and made her way to Madi’s room. The blonde stood at the door and smiled at Madi who was buried under the blankets with just her eyes showing. Clarke pulled the blankets off the girl and picked her up and held her tight. Madi’s head was resting on her shoulder as she started to rouse from her sleep. She lifted her head and looked at the blonde. “Clarke?”

“Hey.” The blonde smiled and kissed her on the head. 

“Is everything ok?” Madi’s eyes widened. “The date! How was the date Clarke!”

Clarke chuckled and hugged the girl tight. “I love you Mads.”

“Clarke.” Madi whined. “I love you too but seriously I was sleeping!”

Clarke laughed again and held her forehead on the girls. “Your Nomon said I could be your mother too.”

Madi’s gasped then squealed as she threw her arms around the blondes neck. “Yes!!!!” She Yelled.

Clarke laughed with tears rolling down her cheeks. She pulled back from the girl and looked her dead in the eyes. “I will die protecting you Madi. I will always do what is best for you and your Nomon. I will be the best parent I could possibly be. That is if you let me?”

Madi chuckled. “Clarke. Your so funny. Of course! I love you!”

Abby stood at the door wiping tears from her cheeks. She jumped when she felt someone behind her. Lexa was smiling at the pair. Abby smiled at her. “You are going to have your hands full with those two Lexa.”

Lexa shrugged. “I have commanded armies, I’m certain I can handle Clarke and Madi.” 

“Nomon! We want to go to the river to celebrate!”Lexa looked at them stunned, “It’s midnight....” Clarke shrugged and swung Madi around. Abby cocked her eyebrow at Lexa. “Perhaps I might need help.” She smiled shyly.


	26. Chapter 26

2 days later Octavia and Clarke held a coalition meeting. Lexa was standing beside the throne that currently had Clarke sitting on, Indra and Octavia were to the left, while Lexa was to the right. The room filled in with the ambassadors who still looked at Lexa in awe. “Ambassadors.” Octavia greeted. “I have heard your requests and myself Indra and Wanheda have come to a conclusion that we believe will satisfy everyone.” Octavia looked to Clarke and nodded. 

Clarke stood. “I will become Heda.” She said proudly. “Until there is more nightbloods and until they are of the age Octavia has put in place. 18.”

Trishana stood. “And what of you Lexa kom trikru, why are you not sitting on the throne.”

Lexa nodded. “I will teach the nightbloods.”

Trishana Frowned. “But you are Heda.”

“No. I was Heda. I died long enough to have the flame removed. I have served my time as Heda and now I was to give back by teaching the nightblood children they way of peace and prosperity.”

She scoffed. “We don’t want Skaikru in charge-“

“Let us not forget what the red queen has done for us!” Lexa cut her off firmly. “Let us not forget what Wanheda has done for us and let us not forget that we are wonkru now!” Octavia looked at Lexa and nodded in thanks. 

The broadleaf ambassador stood. “And you would just step aside red queen.”

“Yes.” She said stepping down from the steps to the throne. “My job as your queen was to ensure our survival until the bunker doors opened. My job was done once those doors were opened and I knew once I seen Wanheda that she would lead us to a bright future. I’m not offended that you all wanted to replace me. I was offended that none of you approached me to my face. I have always been an open ear and reasonable leader. I may have not agreed with some of what you have all said but I still listened and I would have listened if you told me that you wanted a nightblood on the throne because I understand and I especially would have understood if you told me you wanted our one true commander Leksa kom Trikru to lead us once more. My loyalty lies to this very Coalition. I was have happily stepped aside as I am doing now. Myself and Indra will train the army for our commander Wanheda proudly.”

Indra watched on with pride and stuck out her chest. 

Lexa smirked knowing what Octavia was capable of and Clarke stood their in awe. 

The blonde cleared her throat. “I think that we all owe Octavia kom Skaikru and Indra kom trikru our gratitude and some of you owe her an apology.”

Everyone but Trishana nodded in agreement.

The ice nation ambassador stood. “The nightblood child? Is she yours Leksa kom Trikru?”

“Yes And Wanheda.”

He bowed. “Do you believe there will be more?”

Lexa smiled. “I think there are more now but people have hid them well.”

Octavia frowned. “How?”

“My mother tried to hide me.” She shrugged. “As have many other parents of nightblood children. No one wants there child to die and before you changed the conclave there was a very high chance that your child would die. In fear of old traditions I believe that there are still nightblood children but they have been hidden. It would not have been hard.”

Clarke sighed from the chair. “Either way, I believe that now that Lexa is training. The nightbloods more people will come forward.”

The ambassadors were happy with the arrangements, everyone left with smiles on their faces excited to tell the people of Polis that Wanheda was taking change and that all future nightbloods would be taught by the greatest Heda of all. 

Lexa watched the ice nation ambassador wearily as he walked out the door. As soon as the doors were shut Clarke stood in front of Lexa and held her arms. “I know what your thinking?” She said softly.

“Can he be trusted?”

Octavia frowned. “Who?”

Indra scoffed. “The ice nation ambassador, Aron. fool.” She shook her head.

Clarke cupped both the woman’s cheeks. “Yes.” She softly. “I don’t know him as well as Octavia though.” She looked over her shoulder.

Octavia nodded. “Yeah lex nothing to worry about. I have worked closely with ice nation. Nia left a bad taste in everyone’s mouth at the very mention of Azgeda so he and the other leaders of ice nation have been working hard these last years in the bunker to re establish ice nations reputation. They even went as far as making there rations smaller to feed the children.”

“It is true Heda.” Indra smiled. “Even I can stand to be near them and you know how much I despised them.”

Lexa exhaled And she became less tense. Clarke leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead. “It’s ok.” She said softly.

Lexa smiled and hugged the blonde tight. “We will protect our daughter.”

Clarke laughed. “I still love hearing that.” 

................................

Octavia was in her room resting when a knock on her door let her know that the Scavengers had returned. She jumped out of her bed and ran out to the streets of Polis looking for Niylah. She seen the blonde in the distant laughing along with something one of the other scavengers said. He hugged her and Octavia could feel the jealousy boiling beneath her skin but she was on think ice and she figured that Niylah would like it if she smashed his head through the wall. So she approached them calmly.

“Niylah.” She said getting her attention.

Niylah nodded formally. “Red queen.”

Octavia frowned at the formality but decided to question her about it later. “And Who is this.” She asked looking at the man. He was tall and handsome with a lazy smile and kind brown eyes. 

“My name is Tom, red queen.”

She nodded once and looked at Niylah. “Can we talk?”

Niylah sighed and followed Octavia back to her room. Once they entered Niylah took off her jacket and sat down tiredly. “What can I do for you red queen?”

“Niylah.” Octavia said softly sitting next to her. “What’s with this red queen crap.”

She shrugged. “I don’t know.”

Octavia held her hands that were in her lap. “You can always call me by my name and besides I don’t run Polis anymore.”

Niylah shot up from her bed. “What!” She hissed. “Why! What did they do!”

Octavia smiled. “It’s ok really.” She held her hands again. “Me and Indra are in charge of the army, Clarke is commander and Lexa will train the nightbloods.”

“Are you happy with this?”

“Yes.” She smiled. “I really am. I’ll have more time for you too.” she added softly.

“O..”

“Niylah. I have no idea what you see in me.” She shook her head, “but I want to be the person that you deserve, give me a chance? Please?”

Niylah looked at her sadly. “I don’t know.” She said Again.

Octavia gently held her hands. “I know I have hurt you and I’m sorry. I hope you will let me prove to you that I’m worthy of your love.” She kissed Niylah on the cheek. “You can have this room by the way. I’ll sleep in the tower.” 

Niylah smiled at her and watched her leave.

.................

News had spread fast that Clarke was now commander and Lexa was the nightblood trainer. The whole of Polis was buzzing with excitement. Lexa found her way to the school to tell Bellamy if he hadn’t already heard. As she walked in she caught both Bellamy and Rebecca locking lips. “Really?” She smirked making them both jump back. “How inappropriate.” She teased.

Bellamy laughed and rubbed the back of his neck. “Ha Ha very funny Lexa.”

Rebecca smiled. “Sorry about that.” 

Lexa shrugged. “It’s fine. I was hoping to have a word with Bellamy.”

“Oh yeah.” She smiled. “No problems.” She turned and kissed Bellamy on the lips. “I’ll see you soon.”

“Yeah.” He smiled sheepishly.

Once she left Both Lexa and Bellamy laughed. “Great timing.” He nudged her.

“Sorry.” She shrugged.

“What did you need.”

“Well first off to tell you that Clarke is now officially commander and I am the official trainer for the nightbloods.”

“Lexa! That’s great news!” He hugged her.

She smiled. “Yeah and I need your help with something.”

“Oh? Is everything ok?”

“Yes. I want to bond with Clarke.”

Bellamy’s eyes widened. He picked up Lexa and swung her around. Laughing with joy. When he put her down she rolled her eyes but smiled at him. “Lexa! I’m so happy for you!”

“Mochof. I was going to speak to Abby first but I want to make this special and I need your help for that.”

“Of course.” He smirked. “Nothing strange about asking your girlfriends ex fiancé advice about how to propose.”

She punched him. “Shut up.” 

He rubbed his arm and laughed. “Come on let’s sit down and talk this through, although I have to tell you Lexa, I don’t think Clarke needs a big grand gesture, I think you should keep it simple.”

She nodded. “Yes I agree. Now will you be our maid of honour.”

Bellamy laughed. “That’s a girls job.”

“Well I guess I could ask-“

“I’ll do it!”

She smirked. “You sure?”

“Yeah but can we call it something else? Like man of honour.” She grinned.

“No. I like maid of honour.”

He laughed. “Fine. I’d be honoured.”

........................

Once Lexa was done discussing with Bellamy ways in which she could propose she made her way to the clinic to see Abby.

When she walked in Emori was beside her being taught how to take blood pressure. Emori noticed Lexa and smiled. “Lexa.”

“Hello Emori.”

Abby turned and smiled widely at her. “Lexa!” She walked to her and hugged her. “Can I watch Madi again?”

Lexa chuckled. “Of course Abby.” She pulled back. “Can we talk?”

“Yes. Of course follow me.” She walked to her office.

Abby sat down in her chair behind her desk and Lexa sat on the other side. “Abby.” She took a deep breath. “Abby I want to bond with Clarke and I was hoping that I could use your engagement ring you received from Jake. It is ok if you do not want to I completely understand-“

“Yes!” Abby almost screamed.

Lexa jumped a bit but smiled. “Really?”

Abby stood making Lexa stand as well. She reached into her shirt and pulled out the engagement ring and took it off the necklace that was currently holding it. With watery eyes she held Lexa’s hand and gently placed it in her palm them shut her hand holding it tight. “That was always going to be Clarke’s one way or another.” She smiled. “When she told me that she was engaged to bellamy I couldn’t give her the ring cause I knew she didn’t love him. She confessed to me just before the death wave that she loved you, I had seen that look before. The devastation of losing someone who you can’t replace.” She smiled sadly at Lexa. “I couldn’t give her the ring then cause I knew she could never love Bellamy like she loved you so I kept it but then I heard that you were alive and well, and I seen the way she was looking at you and I knew that this ring.” She held Lexa fist. “Would be for you to give to her. I have been waiting for this moment Lexa.”

Lexa nodded and stood up straight. “I will love her in this life and the next.”

“I know.” Abby said and hugged her tight. “I am so happy for you honey. You will take good care of each other.”

“Yes we will.” She said quietly.

“So tell me how your going to do it!”

..............................

“Bell?” Clarke called as she entered to school. She walked in and he quickly shuffled some papers away. He looked guilty.

“Hey princess.”

She looked at him strangely. “You Ok?”

“What? Yeah I’m fine!”

“Ah Ok.” She shook her head. “You seen Lexa I have been looking for her for hours.”

“Ah.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “She was here like an hour ago.”

“Ok?” She looked at him strangely.

“Yup.” He nodded his head. “Did you need her for something?”

“No.” She shrugged. “Just miss her is all.”

He laughed. “Your such a sap princess.”

She smiled. “Yeah.”

“Well as you can see she’s not here so....”

“Ok? Where did she go?”

“Um.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “To the clinic.”

Clarke felt her heart beat faster. “The clinic? Oh my god Bell is she Ok?”

“Calm down princess she’s not sick or anything.”

“Well then why the hell is she going to the clinic!”

“I don’t know to see your mother!”

She took a deep breath. “Ok well I’m going to go find her.”

“Such a sap.” He laughed.

.......................

“Lexa?” Clarke said entering the clinic. 

Her mother turned her eyes were puffy like she had been crying. “Hey honey you just missed her.”

“Mom? Are you ok?”

“Of course!” She smiled.

Clarke frowned she knew something was going on but she couldn’t put her finger on it. Her mother dropped her pen and as she bent over her necklace that had been holding her wedding ring and her engagement ring fell out of her shirt. Clarke’s eyes widened when she realised there was a ring missing off of it. Then she realised why Bellamy was acting strange and why her mother seems to have been crying. She smirked to herself. “Lexa was going to try to propose first. “Not on my watch.” She said softly.

“What was that baby?” Her mother said.

“Nothing mom I gotta go I’ll talk to you later. Love you!” She called over her shoulder.

............................

Raven was pacing. “Why would she tell Bellamy first and not me!”

“Um maybe cause your terrible at keeping a secret....” Clarke replied.

“That is not true!” Clarke arched her eyebrow. “Ok. Maybe a little bit true. Still. Stupid Bellamy..... I better be best man!”

“Raven can we please talk about the matter at hand.”

Raven waved her off. “Yea yeah I’m happy for ya blah blah.” She shook her head. “She better come tell me or I’m going kick her ass!”

Clarke sighed. “Reyes!”

She groaned. “What?”

“I need to make an engagement ring!”

“Oh right.” She smiled. “I can do that princess.”

“I can draw up they way I want it designed?”

“Sounds good.” She started pacing again. “You know? Bellamy is just an asshole!”

“Raven.” Clarke groaned. “Is everyone in love with my girlfriend!”

Raven scoffed. “Ah no...I’m not in love with her I’m in love with Echo that’s just gross princess. Me and her have wayyyyy more in common then her and the bell boy! I mean we are both hot as fuck...we are both awesome....both in love with crazy woman..”

“Hey!”

“I mean look at him, ohhhh look at me and my curly hair and ohhh I can teach a bunch of turds crap about crap that happened a long crappy time ago...” she rolled her eyes. “Honestly I can not believe she told him first!”

Clarke threw her head back. “Raven? Please!”

She stopped pacing and shook her head. “Ok. Draw up what you want and I’ll work on it for you.” She huffed. “Can stupid bell boy make a ring? No he can’t....” she mumbled to herself.

Clarke smiled amused at her friends antics, she walked over to her and hugged her to her side. “Your my best friend? Right?”

Raven smiled at her. “Sloppy seconds.” She smiled.

Clarke kissed her on the cheek and left. “I’d be offended but it’s Lexa!” She called over her shoulder.

....................

Lexa made her way to Raven’s work shop. She found the meachic sitting behind her desk fixing up a radio. She looked up briefly to Lexa then scoffed continuing her work. Lexa frowned. “Hello Raven.”

“Lexa.” She grumbled.

Lexa sat down next to her and held her shoulder. “Is everything ok?”

“Mmm Hmm just dandy....”

“Did I do something to upset you?”

“Nope.” She scowled And got back to fixing her radio.

“Do you need help?”

“Nope.”

“Ok? I can not help but think I have done something to upset you?”

“Nope.” She repeated.

Lexa sighed. “Well we can talk later I have something to ask you. I’m going to propose to Clarke and I would like you to be my best man? Or best woman?” She shrugged. “I don’t know about these customs. They are quite confusing.”

Raven turned to her and squinted her eyes. “Who else will be in this wedding?”

“Ah. My brother and most likely Emori. Bellamy and hopefully Clarke.” She smirked.

“I can keep a secret ya know?”

“Ok?” She Frowned.

“Yup. I am very trustworthy.”

“I know.”

“Do you?”

“Absolutely Raven of the sky people.”

“Then why did you tell that asshat first and not me? And I’m not telling you how I found out so don’t even bother.”

“Oh. Well. Bellamy will be what do you call it. Um the maid of honour and I wanted his advice on how to propose.”

“What! That’s not fair why not me!”

“Well I just assumed you would be busy planning your own bonding ceremony?”

She squinted at Lexa again. “Hmmm.”

Lexa chuckled. “You are strange Raven.”

“So I’m the second person you have told?”

“No....I had to tell Abby-!”

“Are you kidding me! Abby!” She groaned and turned back to her radio. “Not talking to you now.”

“Raven-“

“Nope.”

“But-“

“Nope.” 

“I want-“

“Nope.”

“Let me-“

“Nope.”

“I’m so confused-“

“Nope.”

“Your infuriat-“

“Nope.”

“Will you-“

“Nope.”

“I-“

“Nope.”

“Need-“

“Nope.”

“Yourhelpwithsexualadvice!”

“Nope-wait What?” She turned to the now flushed Commander.

“Look.” She said softly. “Me proposing to Clarke is the easiest thing I will ever do in my life. I told Bellamy first because he is good at organising I talked to Abby second cause I asked her for her engagement ring and I left you for last because me sitting here and I’m about to ask you about sex that is the hardest and most embarrassing of all.”

“What?” Raven Frowned. “I don’t understand.”

Lexa held her hand. “Of course I trust you Raven, your the most loyal person I know.”

“Oh.” Raven looked guilty. “Sorry?”

Lexa smiled. “It’s ok.”

“What’s wrong with your sex life then?”

“I don’t have one?”

“What? How? I thought Clarke would have jumped you the first chance she got!”

Lexa shrugged. “She’s not the issue. I am.”

“Oh? Ok. Well what’s wrong?”

“I have slept with two people my whole life and I haven’t been with anyone since Clarke and she has more experience then I.”

“But I don’t understand.” She said softly. “You have been with Clarke before right?”

“Yes. But so long ago.” She looked away sadly.

“Oh Lexa.” Raven smiled. “Look man I get it ok, your nervous but it’s Clarke.” She shrugged. 

“She’s good at that though.”

“What sex?”

“Yes.” She groaned leaning forward on her knees. “I was so inexperienced the first time we made love.”

“But it was still good though?”

“For me yes.”

“Well did Clarke you know?”

“Of course I’m not completely hopeless.”

Raven held her shoulder. “Hey. I don’t think your hopeless at all I think your nervous because you haven’t had sex in so long but I think your overthinking it.”

“Of course I am Raven. I don’t want to disappoint her.”

Raven looked at her seriously. “You won’t. I promise. You just take your time an it will all come rushing back to you.” Raven lent forward and hugged her tight. “It will be ok. I promise it will.”

Lexa circled her arms around her and sighed. “What if I-“

“Nope.”

“Raven-“

“Nope.”

Lexa laughed and pulled back. “You are so annoying.”

“Yeah but ya love me.” She shrugged. “Now shut up and hand me the screwdriver and tell me what you have planned so far. Then we will get to the dirty stuff” she winked.

...............................

One week later

Lexa walked to Clarke room and found the blonde behind her desk drawing. “Heya Klark.”

She looked up and smiled. “Heya Leksa.” Then placed the drawing in her desk and stood up to walk towards Lexa. She threw her arms around the brunettes neck and kissed her deeply. “I missed you today. I was looking for you everywhere.” She smiled playing with the brunettes hair.

“Sorry, I have been quite busy.”

Clarke smirked and kissed her again. “Me too. What are you doing right now.”

“I’m here with you.”

Clarke shook her head and laughed. “No I mean do you have any plans?”

“No. Only to be here with you.”

“Good.” Clarke said. “I though we could go for a walk and do some star gazing.”

“Sounds nice and your mother is already watching Madi.”

“I know.” she smiled and kissed her again. “Come on!” She pulled her out the door.

....................

Clarke led Lexa to the outskirts of Polis, they walk hand in hand smiling and talking to one another. Greeting people as they passed by. The were on a cliff looking out over Polis. Polis was whole again. From were they were sitting they could see the tower and the flames and fairy lights looked spectacular. Lexa was sitting between Clarke’s legs while Clarke had her arms wrapped around her waist and her chin rested on Lexa’s shoulder. “Told you I would fix it up.”

Lexa smiled and turned so she could look at the blonde. “I had no doubt.” She said softly, she turned her body around and pushed the blonde back so Clarke was lying on her back. Lexa straddled her and kissed her softly. She lied on the blonde with her head propped up on her elbow looking down at the blonde lovingly and playing with her hair. “Clarke.” She said softly pulling the ring out of her pocket. “Will you bond with me?” She held the ring out for Clarke to see.

The blonde smiled with tears in her eyes and pulled a ring out of her pocket. “Only if you will marry me?” She smiled. 

Lexa chuckled. “Who told you?”

“I figured it out myself.”

Lexa leaned down and kissed her. “Nothing gets by you?”

“You’re just not as sneaky as you think Commander.”

Lexa smiled. “So?”

Clarke held up her hand so Lexa could slip the ring on. “Of course Lexa. I love you.”

“Good.” She smiled as Clarke put on her ring. “I’ll marry you too by the way.” Clarke scoffed then kissed her. Lexa looked at the ring. “Clarke it’s gorgeous!” The ring was gold with little diamonds and blue and green gems around it. 

“I designed it and Raven made it.”

“Wow.” She smiled. “It’s wonderful Clarke.”

Clarke looked at her own ring in wonder. “So is mine. This was my great grandmothers ring.” She kissed the brunette. “It means so much to me Lexa. I’m so glad my mother gave it to you.”

..........

As they were walking back hand in hand Lexa looked at the ring she put on Clarke’s finger and the way Clarke would glance at her and smile softly. She felt an overwhelming confidence take over her, one that she hadn’t felt since She was Commander. She pulled the blonde to her body and pushed her against the nearest tree and started leaving little bite marks on her neck. 

Clarke moaned. “Lexa? Not then I’m complaining but why don’t we take this back to our room?”

The brunette smiled and kissed her.

................

Clarke and Lexa were standing at the foot of the bed in just their underwear. They had quickly stripped each other down as soon as the bedroom doors closed. 

Lexa reached around Clarke’s back and undid her bra, slowing sliding the straps down her shoulders. Once the bra was off Lexa gasped. 

Clarke cupped both of her cheeks. “Hey.” She said softly. “It’s just me. We don’t have to do anything, we can just lie in bed-“

Lexa cut her off by kissing her deeply and picked the blonde up, Clarke automatically wrapped her legs around Lexa’s waist. The brunette walked around to the side of the bed and moved them both so they were in the middle. She looked down at the blonde. “You are so beautiful.” 

Clarke smiled up to her. “So are you.” 

Lexa lent down and kissed her.

 

.....................

After making love for most of the night both woman lie facing each other. “Wow.” The blonde said trying to catch her breath. “Where did you learn that.”

“Raven.”

“Raven?”

“Sha. I asked her for advice.”

“Oh.” Clarke smiled softly and kissed her. “I know that must have been hard for you. You didn’t have to though Lexa.”

“I know.” She sighed. “I was nervous, it had been so long and I trust Raven. It was hard but not as hard as I thought it would be.” She shrugged. “Although when I left her workshop I was probably as red as a beetroot.”

Clarke laughed and kissed her. “Im glad you have friends Lexa.”

“Me too.” She smiled. “I asked Bellamy to be our maid of honour and I asked Raven to be best man. Murphy will be my other best man, who will be yours.”

“Well.” Clarke sighed. “You kinda stole mine.”

Lexa laughed. “She can be both of ours.”

“Sounds good.” She smiled. 

“I love you.”

“Love you too.”


	27. Chapter 27

Lexa was training Madi, it was their first offical training sessions as mentor and natebleeder. They had been training most the morning and now where having a break. Lexa noticed Aron the icenation ambassador walking up the hill to them, he had a small child on his hip. A little boy, he would have been about three. 

As they got closer Lexa stood up. “Lexa kom trikru.”

“Aron kom Azgeda.” She replied and smiled politely. “And who is this?” She smiled at the boy.

The little boy looked up to her and smiled shyly. He had black hair and brown eyes. He looked like Aron.

“This is my son Roy.”

“Hello Roy it is nice to meet you.”

“Heya.” He hid his face in the mans chest.

Aron carefully place the boy on the floor. “Why don’t you go play with Madi kom trikru while I speak to our former commander.”

“Sha nontu.”

Once he was out of sight he turned to Lexa. “I know that you have a lot of bad history with the ice nation Lexa but I assure you I have worked hard to clear my clans name.”

“I am aware.” She nodded.

“Good.” He sighed. “Back Before pramfiya, I was a royal guard for Roan kom Azgeda. I was his second. He announced to my clan that if his life ended I was to take his place as king.”

“I liked Roan.”

“I know that also. You gave him a chance to prove himself and even though he thought you were dead he kept the coalition together.”

“I appreciate it.”

“I have trust in you Lexa kom trikru As did Roan which is why I am here today...that little boy.” He pointed to his son. “He is my world, I do not trust a lot of people with him but I’m putting my trust in you with him.”

“What do you mean?”

“He is natebleeder, now I know how people might feel about a noviciate being ice nation but I hope that all the hard work I have put-“

“He will be treated like the rest.” She held out her hand.

He sighed and took her hand in his. “He’s a good child. I was afraid for his life but once you announced that you would train the natebleeder I wasn’t afraid anymore. I know how much you loved your noviciates, Aden kom trikru was my nephew from my sister. She married a trikru man, unfortunately they didn’t make the cut and well I’m sure you heard what happened to Aden and the others. He always spoke highly of you.”

She shook his arm and held his shoulder. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

“Mochof.” He smiled sadly. 

She stood up straight with her hands behind her back and looked over her shoulder at Madi and Roy play fighting. “We are at the beginning of a new era Aron kom Azgeda. There will be hardships as peace is never easy. When I look at your son, I do not see an ice nation boy, I see a boy, one that has black blood, one that could one day lead our people and I will train him with the same morals I trained my noviciates with.”

“Thank you.” He smiled.

“But I will let you know now Aron, that the natebleeder will not just be taught combat, I won’t them to have an education.”

“Education? The school?”

“Yes.” 

“I must be honest here Lexa. I do not trust the man in charge of the school.”

She nodded again. “You have worked hard to clear your clans name, bellamy kom Skaikru has worked hard to try and clear his. I would suggest to you to perhaps meet with Bellamy and have him show you the school and what will be taught, then you can make your assessment.”

“Very well.”

........................

Clarke was sitting at her desk looking over plans when the door burst open and Madi came running in. “Hey mom!”

“Hey Mads.” She smiled gently.

Madi jumped in her lap. “What you doing.” She said looking at the paperwork.

“Seeing how we can improve housing.”

The girl scoffed. “Boring.....”

Clarke laughed.

Lexa walked in and removed her jacket. She smiled at them both and made her way to Clarke to kiss her on the lips. “Hei hodnes.”

“Hello.” She smiled. “Have a good day?”

“Sha. I have a new natebleeder to train.”

“What! Who?”

“His name is Roy son of Aron kom Azgeda.”

“Wow.” She smiled. “That’s excellent. I wonder if there are any more.”

“Maybe.” She shrugged. “He’s cute.” She smiled “and very good with a sword and speaks beautifully, an education would do him well.”

“Ice nation are on the fence about the school.”

“Sha. But I spoke to Aron, he’s speaking to Bellamy right now actually, hopefully it will help change his mind.”

“Hopefully Bell won’t screw it up.”

“Have faith.” Lexa smiled and leaned down to kiss her again. “Now stop working and come have dinner with us.”

“I have to sort through-“

“Clarke.” Lexa looked at her sternly. “Did you eat lunch?”

“Of course!”

“Mom?” Madi giggled and pointed to the plate of food that was at least 4 hours old. 

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Fine. But I’m only eating because I want to.”

Lexa smirked and held her hand around the blondes waist. “So not for nourishment?”

“No.” Clarke grumbled.

Lexa chuckled. “Madi run ahead and tell your uncle we will join them for dinner.”

“Sha Nomon.” She ran off.

Lexa held both the blondes hips and stopped her from walking. “Clarke you have to eat and drink.”

“I don’t do it on purpose Lexa I lose-“

“Track of time. I know.” She said gently. “You have to make time for your wellbeing.”

“There’s so much to do-“

“And plenty of time to get it done. You have to learn how to delegate hodnes. Promise me you will start taking care of yourself.”

“What would you suggest?”

“Well clearly when you are in your own state of mind you forget about nourishment so my advise is to have a maiden bring you food at set times during the day.”

“But that’s so weird.”

“It isn’t, its part of delegating. Trust me Clarke. I know what I am talking about.”

“I’m not going to go find a slave-“

“Not a slave an assistant and if you won’t I will.”

“I’m never going to do-“

“Then I will.”

“Your not going to let this go are you.”

Lexa brushed some hair behind Clarke’s ear. “No. I’ll never not think of your well-being. You need to eat and drink during the day.”

“Ok.” She sighed.

“Very well. You go down to Madi I am going to find you an assistant.”

“Can you make sure there not an asshole.”

Lexa chuckled. “Ok.” She kissed her. “I won’t be long.”

.........................

Clarke was sitting with Madi, John, Emori, jay jay and the baby eating dinner quietly. At least until the doors to the eating hall slammed opened. “I said not Bellamy!” Raven raised her voice.

“Lexa gets the last say Reyes and besides I’m the man of honour.”

“It’s maid of honour you dick!”

Echo walked in behind them grinning. She looked at Clarke and rolled her eyes at the two of them making Clarke chuckle.

Raven slumped down in the seat across from the blonde and Bellamy sat beside Raven and Echo on the other side. “If you don’t wear it, it will ruin what everyone else is wearing!”

“I don’t care!”

“Raven.” Echo said gently. “You would Look breath taking.”

Raven rolled her eyes and kissed the woman. “Der, that’s why I am wearing one when we get married.”

Clarke smiled. “What are you both arguing about now.”

“Raven won’t wear a dress.”

“Oh.” Clarke shrugged. “So?”

“Thank you princess!”

Bellamy shook his head. “Shhh princess the grown ups are talking.”

“Do I not get a say?”

“No.” He shrugged. “You have terrible taste in clothing.”

Raven scoffed. “Gotta agree with ya there.”

“Excuse me!”

The doors opened again, lexa walked in with an old woman following her. “Clarke? I would like you to meet Hera. She was my maiden in my rule as commander and she will now be yours.”

“Ah.” Clarke stood and held out her hand. “Hi.”

“Hello Wanheda.” She smiled politely and shook her hand. “I have meant you once before.”

“Oh? I’m sorry I don’t remember.”

“Perhaps that is because you were running from Lexa’s room after making love to her.”

Clarke blushed while everyone including Lexa was laughing. “Haha.” She rolled her eyes. 

Raven smacked the table. “I like her!”

The older woman smiled. “I will come see you tomorrow morning to talk about your daily activities?”

“Oh I’m busy.” She lied.

“Really?” Lexa cocked her head. “With what?”

“I Ah I have a meeting.”

“Oh yes.” Lexa rubbed her chin. “I cancelled that.”

“You cancelled my meeting.”

“Sha now you are free.”

Clarke sat down and pouted. Raven lent forward on the table. “Princess she totally just cancelled your fake meeting.” She snickered

Clarke rolled her eyes. “Well.” She turned towards Lexa and the older woman who were talking. “I do have important things to do tomor-“

“Clarke.” Lexa said sternly. “We have talked about this.”

“Well you talked-“

“You agreed.” She looked at with her eyebrows raised. “You either take the help that Hera and her daughter whom you will meet tomorrow morning are offering or I have my loyal guards follow you around all day long and report to me.”

“You know.” Clarke stood and turned around. “I’m Commander right?”

Lexa stood up in her space. “You are not MY Commander, you are MY soon to be wife whom doesn’t take care of herself when she works. You either take the help that is being offered to you Clarke kom Skaikru or I will find somewhere else to sleep tonight.”

Clarke rolled and sat down in her chair. “Fine!”

Madi held Clarke’s hand and moved her dinner plate towards the blonde. “Come on mom. You know Nomon is right, you have to take care of yourself. Have some dinner.”

Clarke sighed and kissed her daughters head. “Ok goufa.”

Lexa turned “Hera, ill see you tomorrow morning.” 

“Sha.”

Clarke felt the older woman hold her shoulder. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning Wanheda.”

“Yeah, I’m not happy about it.”

“We are going to have so much fun.” She smiled and made her way to the door.

Lexa sat down beside her and kissed her on the cheek. “Love you.”

“Mmm. I guess I love you too.”

Lexa laughed. “Now what is going on?”

Both Bellamy and Raven started yelling over the top of each other.

....................

Octavia knocked on Niylahs door. “Come on.” She heard.

“Hey.” She greeted the woman who was currently reading over paperwork.

“Hi.” She smiled.

“Going through inventory?”

“Yeah we recovered quite a lot when we went scavenging.”

Octavia nodded. “That’s good to hear, So um. Everyone is in the dinning hall having dinner I was wondering if you would like to join me?”

Niylah stood and shrugged. “Sure.” She smiled. 

Octavia smiled. “Great.”

..................

Bellamy and Raven were still arguing about Lexa and Clarke’s wedding when he felt a tap on his shoulder. “Becca.” He smiled. “You made it.”

“Yup.” She smiled and sat in his lap. “I’m hungry.”

He dished her some food and watched lovingly as she ate. 

Lexa was watched, happy for her friend. “Bellamy? How did things go today with Aron?”

“Really well! Lexa He was asking me all sorts of questions he seemed really impressed, I think that he may encourage ice nation to educate their children.”

“This is good news.” She smiled.

“What’s good news?” She felt Octavia sit by her side. 

“Azgeda is considering schooling their children.”

“Oh wow.” Octavia looked at her brother impressed.

Niylah sat down beside Octavia. “That is excellent news Bellamy.”

“Thanks.” He smiled. “But it was Lexa who gave him the push.

Lexa frowned. “You give yourself little credit Bellamy.”

He shrugged. “Yeah.” Becca said pecking him on this lips.

“Sister.” Murphy scoffed. “You don’t know when to take credit either, you are just as bad.”

She rolled her eyes. “Shof op bro.”

He smirked at her. “Make me.”

“Great, training pits tomorrow brother?”

“Hey!” Octavia raised her hand. “Why the hell do you get to fight Murphy but not me.”

Clarke chuckled. “You seen Murphy fight?”

Octavia grinned. “Point taken.”

Murphy just shrugged. “I suppose I am a lover not a fighter.” Emori cackled. Murphy looked at her confused. “What?”

“Oh.” She said surprised. “You are serious?”

Every laughed. “Laugh it up assholes.” He grinned. “I got the girl.”

Raven smirked. “Yeah by almost killing her right?”

“Piss off reyes!” He laughed and shook his head. “It was romantic.”

Clarke chuckled. “Yeah nearly dying by chocking is so romantic!”

Lexa shook her head. “Octavia. A new natebleeder was bought to me today.”

“Really! Who?”

“Roy kom Azgeda.”

“Aron’s son!”

“Yeah.”

“Well that’s shocking. He did a good job at hiding it.”

“Parents would go to any lengths for their children. I have no doubt there is more. So I have been thinking that you as the general of the army spread news that my lessons for just one day will be open for people to watch.”

“Good idea Lex I’ll get on top of it as soon as I am finished dinner.”

“Mochof.” She smiled. 

Clarke wrapped her arm around Lexa’s waist and whispered in her ear. “You’re so smart. It’s so sexy.”

Lexa blushed. “Eat your food Clarke.” 

Clarke laughed and continued to ear her dinner.

Niylah turned to Octavia. “You need company after dinner.”

Octavia looked at her shocked. “Oh...of course if you are free.”

Niylah placed her hand on Octavia’s knee. “Of course Octavia.” She smiled.

Octavia smiled and looked at Clarke. “Hey princess. When can I spar with Lexa again?”

“Oh.” She rubbed her chin. “Let me think.” She squinted her eyes. “In about ummm.....never.”

“This is bullshit! I can’t have people thinking I lost that fight!”

Lexa smirked. “But you did.”

Octavia took a deep breath. Then quickly got Lexa in head lock. “Admit it!”

“No never!”

Madi giggle. “Go Nomon!”

Clarke rolled her eyes. So did Niylah they both stood and gently separated the two of them.

Beca Frowned. “What fight are you talking about?”

Bellamy kissed her cheek. “The great fight between the commander and the red queen.”

“Oh!” Beca exclaimed. “The fight the red queen lost?”

“I did not!”

“Ok.” Clarke said loudly. “We will never really know so time to move on.” She sat down. “Clearly Lexa won.” She shook her head.

“What!” Octavia sighed. “One day....”

“Yes.” Lexa agreed. “One day.”

“Mmmm.” Clarke said taking a bite of Bread. “Yes.one day, Over my dead body.”

Octavia groaned and turned to Niylah. “You believe me right.”

Niylah smiled. “Of course.”

Octavia smiled and kissed her on the cheek. “Mochof.”

“Pro.”

Lexa laughed along with Clarke. She took a good look around the room at her friends and family. She was so beyond happy.

...........................

Lexa was at the training pits with Madi and Roy. Octavia did what Lexa asked and currently the place was crowded to the point where people were sitting on people’s shoulders just to see.

Octavia nudged Lexa’s shoulder. “Good turn out.”

“Sha. Mochof.”

“Pro.” She made her way to Niylah and smiled over her shoulder.

Clarke looked around. “I know you’re up to something.”

“Sha. Promise me that no matter what happens you will stay back.”

“What?”

“Clarke. Please. Just trust me.”

Clarke took a deep breath. “I do trust you, I’ll stay back.”

“Good.” She smiled and kissed her softly. “Now go stand by everyone else.”

 

..........

Lexa gave both Roy and Madi a staff, everyone was amazed at what both children could do. People were clapping and cheering for both the children and Lexa. 

“He’s ice nation!” 

Lexa stopped what she was doing to look at whoever said that. Roy hid behind her leg. She found a man who had shallow valley tattoos. She took a deep breath and looked down to Roy. “Do not hide Roy.”

He nodded and puffed out his chest and made his way back to Madi with his staff. He dropped it on the way.

“Look at him. Stupid ice nation boy can’t even hold a staff!”

Lexa paused and turned her head to the man. She picked up the Roy’s staff and made her way to him. She threw it at him. “Show me you can do better?”

The man laughed. “Ice nation should not be a noviciate!”

Lexa walked away from him then stalked her way back. “He is natebleeder!”

“I will never be ruled by ice nation!” He pointed to the boy. “He is a disgrace!”

“Madi?” She held out her hand. 

Madi nodded and threw the staff to her, she caught it and swung it around. “You are the disgrace!”

“My Name is-“

“Your name is not worth remembering!” She ran at her hitting him squared in the nose with the end of the staff, breaking it. She paced in front of him. “Get up you foolish coward!” He stood and ran at her. She stood calmly and when he became close enough she kicked her leg out kicking him in the stomach winding him. “These are My natebleeder and anyone who challenges them! Challenges me! Now get up!”

He rose slowly. “After all that Azgeda has done.” He spat out blood. “How could you defend that boy!”

Aron went to move forward but Lexa glared at him making him stop. “Do not speak to me about the crimes of ice nation, I have suffered first hand from it!” She kicked out his legs behind him making him hit the ground with a thud. “But that was then...and this is now! We are one!”

Another man ran at her from behind but Lexa could hear him advancing and turned in time to throw him over her shoulder making him land on the shallow valley man. “No clan is free from blood! No clan!” She paced. “The natebleeder is sacred and I will die protecting them! Are we really going to hold the crimes of past leaders on a 3 year old boy! Is that who we are!”

Everyone started shouting no. No no no. Over and over. 

“Anyone else want to challenge my natebleeder!”

A woman ran at her. “No ice nation commander!” She screamed. Lexa picked up her staff and swung it around to hit her in the head knocking her out.

Lexa looked at Clarke who was watching with her fists clenched, she moved just a little but Lexa shook her head making her stop. Clarke looked away in anger but stayed back. 

A big man moved into the ring. “Nice nation took my family!” He Yelled. 

“They took mine too!” Lexa yelled back. “We can not dwell in the past! Look at him.” She pointed to the boy who had tears in his eyes. Madi had her arm around his shoulders protectively. “Look at him and tell me he is a threat to our people!”

The man took a deep breath and bowed. “He is just a boy.”He said softly. “He is just a boy.”

“Yes!” Lexa looked around to the people. “He is just a boy. A natebleeder boy. A boy who was not even born when Azgeda committed the crimes you speak of! He is the son of Aron kom Azgeda. King of Azgeda! A man of peace!” She looked at the boy. “Roy come forward.” He did and stood by her side. “What are the three pillars of being commander?”

He puffed out his chest. “Wisdom, compassion and strength, teacher.”

“Sha.” She smiled down to him. 

She looked around the crowd. “Anyone else!” She snarled. No one else tried to challenge her. “Good. Now move along.”

Every moved out. Aron ran to his son and picked him up and hugged him tight. He looked at Lexa and smiled. 

Clarke made her way to the group of people that tried to challenge Lexa. She circled them. “Mom.” Madi said stopping her in her tracks. “Mom they are not worth it.” She said gently. 

Lexa was on the other side. “Klark?” She held out her hand. “Come to me?” 

Clarke clenched her jaw and looked back at the group. Madi was tugging her hand. “Mom...come on.”

Clarke took a deep breath and allowed Madi to pull her along, not once did she take her eyes off the people on the ground. “Clarke.” Lexa said gently. She cupped both Clarke’s cheeks and turned he rhead. “Clarke.” She said Again. “Look at me.” Clarke looked at her. “I’m fine.”

Clarke swallowed the lump in her throat. “Don’t ever make me stand there and watch people attack you again!” She snapped and tried to walk away. 

Madi has both her hands on Clarke’s back making sure she couldn’t move. “Mom it’s ok.” She said gently. 

“Move Madi.”

Lexa wrapped her arms around the blondes shoulders. “Calm down.”

“Don’t tell me what to do.”

“Klark...Beja...ai hod yu in.” Clarke closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She wrapped her arms around the brunettes waist and rested her chin on her shoulder. “It has to be done.”

“No-“

“Yes Klark. It did. People need to know I’m going to protect the natebleeder I didn’t just do this for Roy or any other natebleeder that comes into my care, I did this for our daughter. I’m taking charge just like you suggested.”

Clarke nodded. “Ok.” She said softly. 

Lexa pulled back and gently kissed her lips. “Can I kill them?” She looked over her shoulder at the people who were slowly getting up off the ground.

Lexa laughed. “No. Blood must not have blood.”

“Right.” She rolled her eyes. “Do you think they will try anything again.”

“No.”

Clarke nodded. “Come on. I want to go back to the tower.”

Lexa and Clarke held hands with Madi walking in front of them. Lexa smiled at her. “How do you like Hera.”

“She’s annoying.”

“Oh?”

“Makes me eat, practically forces the food down my throat.”

Lexa chuckled. “Yes I remember.”

“I like her though.” She shrugged. “Her daughter is nice as well. Not as pushy as her mother though. I like her better.”

Lexa pulled Clarke to her side and wrapped her arm around her waist. “You will get used to it.” She kissed her temple.

“No I won’t.”

Madi giggled. “I guess you will just complain about it then mom. The commander of death more like the commander of sooking.”

Clarke rolled her eyes and chased after her daughter. “Yeah you better run.” She laughed.

Lexa stood back and watched the two play car and mouse. It was like everything had fallen into place. Clarke was now the leader she knew she could be. Lexa had a role she absolutely loved and she was surrounded by people who loved and cared for her. She was going to bond the most gorgeous intelligent person on earth. She had a family. She smiled when Clarke caught Madi. Clarke looked at her with pure bliss on her face. She smiled at Lexa. “Lexa tell our daughter she is wrong.”

“But I’m not a really good liar Clarke.”

Madi burst out laughing.

“You.” She pointed to Lexa. “Are sleeping on the couch.”

Lexa smiled and hugged the blonde. “Ah ha.” She kissed her. “Love you.”

Clarke groaned. “Love you too.”

Yes. Lexa thought as she lead them both to the tower. This is their someday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well that’s it for this story. Hope you all enjoyed it. I might go an epilogue some time down the track. I have been Working on another fic and I have another one in mind but can’t start that till I finished the one I’m writing now. Thanks for the support guys. FYI for all my readers. I’m going to try to be more disciptive in my next fic. So it might take a little longer. :)


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